Breaking Free from OCD Event - Full Coverage

welcome to tonight's event tonight we're going to talk about OCD obsessive compulsive disorder it's a disease that affects many of us in the community but many of us don't know we have it and if we do sometimes we're embarrassed and ashamed the common idea behind OCD that we all think of when we think of OCD is that someone's either extra organized or that they're afraid of germs but there are many many other forms of OCD that played people um that we're all unaware of so forms like intrusive fears of irrational fears of all kinds intrusive thoughts of harming yourself you don't want to harm yourself but you have thoughts that keep coming of harming yourself intrusive thoughts of harming others Gay Thoughts uh obsessing over checking things religious OCD obsessing over social interactions these thoughts just come and you cannot get them out it's a disease that causes a tremendous tremendous amount of pain and suffering a disease that lingers and grows if not treated now many doctors and therapists think think that they could treat the disease but they fail because they're not experts and specialists in this disease you're going to hear that consistently throughout the night now I asked a few people to speak tonight that wouldn't because they were embarrassed and who can blame them that's why we put on tonight's event tonight's event is really set up for three reasons first is to remove the stigma around around OCD the second is to educate you so that you understand what the symptoms are so you can spot the symptoms and the third is to provide you a place to turn for help now people can go months and years without knowing that they have OCD or be wrongly or being wrongly diagnosed and as as I said before you're going to hear that consistently with this disease it's very very important that you find the right doctor that specializes in this disease now many of my friends came to me with different symptoms they didn't know they had OCD and I told them I said you may have OCD they said n no I don't have OCD I said okay maybe you do and things got worse and worse and worse until they finally spoke to the doctor and were changed for the better right now we're not an organization we're just here to help and tonight you're going to hear some incredible stories from people who have a lot of courage to speak so I first like to welcome Victor DW my good friend to say a few words hey thank you so much Ally first off I just want to give a big shout out to everyone I do comedy sometimes and I did a comedy sketch and I shaved uh I didn't shave but I had put on a bald cap lot of people were very worried that I took off my great head of hair I actually still have hair so if you're watching this and you're one of those people I know OCD is important so is my hair so I just wanted to set the record straight I still have hair uh I have some notes Here going to look at it and then direct to the camera first off I want to thank Ally for putting this uh all together Ally you're just like my age we're in our 30s the fact that you're doing this you're a real leader of uh people so thank you so much Al I get to the thing um I want to thank God Hashem I made that very seriously for helping me get the help that I got because obsessive compulsive disorder gone unchecked can and probably will ruin your life it really it can if if enjoying life is being present then suffering from obsessive compulsive disorder completely strips you of being being able to be present in any real way it's a terrible terrible terrible disorder and um I'll going to tell you a little bit about my experience and if anyone can relate to me um in any way uh seek help uh also you can get in touch with me if you want to talk to me at any time I'll you figure out how to get in touch with me but that's uh the purpose of what I'm going just going over tonight is to tell you about my experience I'll let Al figure out the rest okay so um and Aly call me out on time and whatnot all right how much time do I have right now you're good I'm good okay so I'm I'm 38 growing up I was always a little particular uh you know nothing really crazy but things had to be a certain way I found that I liked things in certain positions but uh you know I I guess it was a little uh you know neurotic people would say uh it uh it wasn't anything crazy uh you know my friends would notice you know if the remote moves a little there you know a little over there it would have to move back but nothing debilitating I mean it was just all right that it is what it is um so I never really thought uh anything of it when I was around 17 uh I noticed that um on my math tests uh I would have to go back and reread the question so I would answer a question and I was good at math I would answer the question and then I would feel the desire to go back and reread it like as if I wasn't sure if I filled out the question forget if I did it right but like I wouldn't know if I if I did it's even hard to explain cuz it's so cloudy but I would have to go back and do it again um and what would normally take me like finish a test in 20 minutes I was suddenly I I couldn't even finish the test in the completion of the period and um that started to happen a lot with writing uh very interesting um and then there are some other things but let's focus on that for a second um so I went to my mother and um I said Ma I I think there's something wrong uh you know I didn't get into it cuz you know it's a little embarrassing it's weird I said can I see a therapist she said fine no problem uh whatever it cost she got me a great therapist Community recommended and I sit down with a guy I said I think I have OCD I'm doing this over and over again the guy says no you don't have it start meditating okay about a year goes by and now it's getting worse suddenly um and I don't think anything of it suddenly um rereading everything I have to read things a certain number of times if I think certain thoughts they need to be gone over a certain number of times in my head uh sub vocalized which means you know when you you use your own voice in in your head uh in a certain pattern in a certain way uh walking in a certain way uh in my room as I think it and if I step in the wrong way I have to start all over again suddenly I'm I'm like completely trapped many many many hours uh of many days and people wouldn't know it uh but you know when I go out and I socialize I just can't stop thinking about getting back to check something uh and it it's quite often that a year goes by a year later goes by I go back to my mother ma can I go back to the therapist she says no problem go back to the therapist I tell the guy again and this wasn't some random guy beautiful office uh recommended from people uh sit down with the guy he says I'm telling you Vic you just have some anxiety you don't have OCD maybe have some obsessive compuls of Tendencies to just try and meditate try and relax so all right and I'm 17 18 I believe the guy um let's fast forward I get to high I get to college now it really gets completely out of control I'm not going to go into all the different things but let's just say it really took over my life now if you're friends with me and you've gone out with me yes we've had fun but I really wasn't present a lot of those times um I was constantly thinking about getting back to check or if you were with me for 1 or 2 hours that was like it every other hour of the day I was basically ritualizing I'll give you some examples um well actually since we're uh cut for time I'll tell you the worst of it it it basically got to the point where I I couldn't read yeah okay I couldn't read um because I would just read the sentence over and over again I wasn't sure if I comprehended it the right way um walking I would have to you know if I walked in a certain pattern or in a certain way I would feel off um I couldn't write an email to my uh professors even if I had to um because I would re I would get worried that maybe I wrote something insensitive like let's say um I had a friend who was African-American I'm a diverse individual uh I will think oh maybe I use the n word or something and I would reread it over and over and over again even though your brain understands that okay it's obvious that you didn't do this but the doctor will talk about how the reasoning behind it but you can shake the anxiety um at its worst um a lot of it had to do for whatever re reason with reading um so texts were were uh obviously a big part of communication at its worst I would stay home and it could be anyone's text message uh and I would reread the a single line in a text message over and over and over again for8 hours which if you told me to do that that's like you couldn't even you couldn't pay me to do that I could use the money but you couldn't even pay me to do that um imagine from 12:00 at night to 8:00 in the morning reading the same line over and over again no back bathro break because the bathroom would break up the the ritual uh which the doctor will talk more about what that is so it's just it's crazy um but you know you're not crazy and so you struggle um it's it's uh again the doctor will talk more about it that's not what I'm here for um uh and then it wouldn't just be that it would be thinking things so I couldn't even think the same way I would have to read a text message just certain way my thoughts now started to be like this and I'm not I know this sounds crazy my people who know me is like they know that I'm not particularly anxious what I mean by that is things that would should typically make you nervous don't make me nervous I'm pretty confident in in my life and those areas so it's not any one particular type of thought but I would anything any type of thought I would have to think it in a certain way so if I was thinking about going to lunch with Ally I would would play that in my mind and I would have to do it in a certain way and there's no solving it you never do it in the right way as the doctor will probably tell you in some way so you just do it all the time um at one point it got so bad that at its worst I just I I I broke down crying and I just tore my I I remember I was wearing a white v-neck which was stylish at the time and um and uh I just tore it open like I was in morning and I just got down on my knees in my bedroom and I just said please God help me I didn't know what was going on I knew I wasn't crazy but I couldn't stop doing these I just I couldn't stop doing it it comes to a point where I'm in college and I'm graduating and um I don't know what to do because now I have to go out in the real world get a job have a life and I call my aunt Susan who's uh probably watching this and she's brilliant woman who's deals she does psychology stuff anyway um I'm sure she's like yeah that's my career psychology stuff that's you know but anyway um yeah that's what you do so I called my aunt Susan 2 minutes I'm going to try and make it quick I called my aunt Susan and I said I think I have OCD give me give me three okay say I think I have OCD and she said all right you know well let's let's see what we could do oh no she said all right well I'll I'll get you the help whatever it is because that's it it was just I couldn't function I couldn't leave my apartment in Boston I called my aunt and she connected me with someone in Harvard pretty sure she helped pay for it uh very expensive topof thee line Harbor doctor in Cambridge magnificent office overlooking the green and I'm seeing her three times a week for about 8 weeks that's how intensive my issue was um I don't know if I was really getting better I don't think I was but whatever you're in therapy you know she said I have OCD um I don't really think I was getting better anyway it comes time to graduate and I have to go back to New York and that doctor refers me to a new doctor and the first thing he says to me uh when he gets on the phone is forget everything she told you just show up Thursday and uh in about 6 months I was fine about six months I was fine uh about a year I was really fine now to this day I still struggle with it to this day to this very moment uh but I know what I'm doing I know the tools and I know how to be on top of it and I'm perfectly fine and I can speak to and I can read even though I'm not reading imine I'm still suffering that's why I didn't read but no um so um I'm going to conclude this with saying a few things um is that right Ally just a couple tips so I'm fine now thank God this doctor saved my life so um I'm going to give a few tips to people out there okay um the first is uh treat it like it's a business uh treat your health like it's some sort of a business what do I mean by that uh my aunt and I when we got back I don't know I think it was her idea but when we got back to the Third Doctor um we said we're going to be we're going to partner on this uh when you get there ask him the prognosis which is to say what are the odds you know is it excellent can you live an excellent life is it mediocre like you're going to struggle your whole life how quickly do you think you can be able to get better and what are the treatment how often do you need to come in and then once we get that we're going to see if we like it and if we like it we're going to hold him accountable and if it's not we're going to find another person uh and we treated it very very very seriously and I had a partner in it so thank God I had her and thank God that therapist worked out but if you're going to get help treat it very seriously if you see a therapist and the person sucks dump the guy or girl get someone else there's no shame in it a lot of people are horrible it is what it is um and um yeah the last thing I'll say uh two more things one is I just will say for those out there that are you know worried uh what comes after recovery it really is a blessing for me that I had to deal with this because I'm so so on top of my mental health now and I'm so uh I can't even tell you I've read maybe 50 60 70 non-fiction books all about the mind and uh I'm very on top of it um the third thing is I'll wrap up with this if someone I mean we as humans can barely put together an Ikea table it's almost impossible it's very difficult the brain is the most mysterious organ on the planet to think that you can solve comp problems on your own is very dumb it's very dumb if you have an issue whether it's obsessive compulsive disord or not or whether you have a name for it or you don't there are people out there whose jobs it is like Dr Schmidt who's going to speak who devoted their entire life to fixing you to to to to fixing you so be smart and get help speak to someone like that and if they're not good keep moving don't settle uh you can you can get better and uh that's it that's I have more to say so if you want to you can get in touch with me but thank you for listening I hope I help someone all right thank you so much thanks all right thank you thank you Victor beautiful um I'd like to invite Sarah Harari to please speak thank you Sarah thank you hi everyone I'm nervous no okay hi everyone I'm so grateful to be sitting here today as I honestly never thought I would be sharing with you a story of healing OCD became so prominent in my life I never imagined that I would make it out on the other side and fight it I hope that by sharing my story I can connect with even just one person who might be feeling the same way I did for so long many people use the term OCD lightly they casually say in passing that they are OCD with cleaning or OCD with organizing because they strive for and appreciate order and cleanliness but real estd the actual dating disease the rumination of thoughts the painful disorder does not get mentioned in passing those who suffer from OCD often live in secret distress they don't talk about it they don't acknowledge it they can't control it and they are ashamed by it when left untreated it can take away a person's self-esteem self- love and selfworth this is the OCD that I had mine was easily masked and not spoken of my story began when I was a student I had a strong drive to do well coupled with an intense fear of failure every test announcement sent me into a spiral I'd obsess over how I was going to best study and best manage my time to call me disciplined and diligent was an understatement I was compelled to study hours at a time and I often set my alarm clock well Before Sunrise to review my notes once more I chose schoolwork over friends every weekend on the outside I looked like a dedicated hardworking straight A student but on the inside I was drowning in anxiety waves of panic would crash over me and Knots would twist in my stomach no matter how much I studied and reviewed my mind always doubted whether I had done enough this was my first encounter with the dting disease I thought school was the end of it finally I could breathe but then I became a parent and the fears of failure came rushing back I had to be responsible for the safety and health of my children and I was so afraid of making a mistake I threw myself into parenting with the same intensity as my school work I read every book attended every class and childproof my home in ways most people wouldn't even think of the stomach aches came back as I feared that something I did didn't do could lead to harm the pain doubt and anxiety clouded my mind I couldn't be fully present with my friends nor have a healthy balance of life and my worries didn't stop with me I'd hear about someone else's pain a tragedy an accident and illness and I would feel their pain I internalized it their stories became mine they would feed my already anxious mind if it happened to them I thought why couldn't it happen to me I told told myself that my hypervigilance was keeping my family safe I didn't know it at the time but the doubting disease was growing stronger it questioned my daily tasks convincing me that I could be at fault I became consumed by intrus by intrusive thoughts of what if what if I left my stove top on after cooking what if I forgot to lock one of my doors what if I left the window open and an intruder came in everything would be all my fault and then my mind convinced me that I had a reason to feel this way I was robbed twice as a child and had a close call with a fire when I was newly married my basement windows were broken into and our sukka once burned to the ground from an electrical fire my mind had proofed that disasters have happened before and that surely they can happen again sometimes there were nights where I would check the doors windows and appliances over and over lasting for hours at a time I would get into bed try to rest these intrusive thoughts would show up I would get back out of bed and it would happened sometimes over 20 times 30 times so hours used to go by the DS were like a runaway train that never stop for the most part it was an invisible battle a silent mental battle that others couldn't see but over time my fears and worries began to govern my life I avoided building the Suka because of the possibility of another fire I avoided travel because it took me way out of my comfort zone I hesitated to host Gatherings by the pool and Beach because no amount of lifeguards felt safe enough for the Myriad of ominous possibilities I switched LED lights for Shabad and holiday candles because they felt safer just the sight of a lit candle in someone's home would make me uneasy on the few occasions that I shared what I was going through I was met with advice or rather criticism saying that I worry too much for no reason I should be grateful for what I have and think positive although they meant well they didn't understand that it wasn't in my control I willed myself to be normal but couldn't my self-esteem began to chip away it crumbled no amount of logic could silence the fear inside me that's when I knew I had to find help I couldn't keep living this way with a strong support group alongside me I turned to therapy for the first time in my life I had a name for what I was experiencing obsessive compulsive disorder at first I resisted the diagnosis saying that I didn't compulsively wash my hands or need things in perfect order but I soon learned that OCD has many forms including the overwhelming fear of uncertainty and worst case scenarios my mind demanded absolute certainty that I was safe and responsible but life is full of uncertainty no matter how many times I checked or reviewed the doubt never fully went away it always came back and I never felt safe now I understood why OCD was so mentally exhausting through Expos exposure and response prevention therapy or Erp I was told that I would slowly get better exposures involve facing my fears and sitting with the discomfort instead of making it go away my list of exposures included leaving appliances plugged in overnight lighting candles again checking doors only once it took time and practice and each exposure initially felt unbearable but over time I learned how to breathe through the anxiety and ground myself in the present with each achieved exposure the doubts would decrease and the power of OCD would diminish my brain slowly learned that the thoughts were just thoughts they were not facts or proofs of imminent danger most importantly I began to trust my own intuition today my journey is still unfolding sometimes the fear still arise but I no longer let them control me I share my story with you because I know I'm not alone so many people suffer in silence believing their worries are just part of who they are but they don't have to healing is possible hope is possible no matter how long you've lived in fear and anxiety it's never too late to take the first step toward change thank you beautiful job wow crazy wow Sarah that was really uh that was special thank you for your for sharing all that so so my uh my journey with OCD started a number of years ago um it actually started at a safe event I was listening to someone speak and I was sitting in one of the first rows of the event and I all of a sudden felt that I needed to go to the restroom but I really couldn't get up because if I got up it would you know the person was speaking it just wouldn't work so I tried to sit and not go but as the speech went on and on I just became obsessed with the idea that I needed to go but I couldn't go and it just it just I started sweating and this entire Obsession around I have to go to the bathroom now it just it just took over my body and from that moment on for the next few months years I was plagued with intrusive thoughts of all kinds thoughts of irrational fears like a fire or something else um thoughts that I was going to get into a car accident when I was driving my car thoughts of being stuck in an elevator by myself or with people and I wouldn't be able to get out and find the restroom thoughts that I might hurt myself now I didn't want to hurt myself but the thoughts come in and then you can't get rid of them thoughts that my children would get hurt um and these thoughts just kept coming and coming and I couldn't get them out it got so bad that at some point I would hear about someone else having an issue and I would take on that issue and all of a sudden I would think I have that issue but I didn't but I heard it in a movie and all of a sudden I associate with it as I fought the thought they just kept growing and growing I started to avoid things I stopped driving my car and I would just take an Uber to work I every event and situation I would assess is there a restroom readily available can I handle this and many things I just wouldn't go to everywhere I went I always knew where the nearest restroom was before I walked into the room every basement that I went into I always checked for the nearest exit in case there was a fire I wouldn't hold a knife I would cut steak with a fork Sho parties meetings the tennis court everywhere I went these thoughts were in my mind it took over my life I was completely obsessed it was it was debilitating I was doing some crazy things like if I had a meeting I went to the restroom before I left to go to the meeting when I got to the person's floor I went to the restroom right before the meeting I went to the restroom during the meeting I would schedule in my mind when I'm going to the restroom it was very very very painful I really didn't tell anyone about it I didn't tell my wife the only person I told was a therapist I was seeing at the time and I love him but he told me everything's going to be fine none of these things are going to happen and one morning I wasn't I wasn't getting better it was just I was crying on my way to work it was just it was it was horrendous and one morning I was in bed and I'm reading this article I don't know how the article came on my phone but it was an article about like OCD and symptoms and I'm like oh my God I started associating with all those symptoms I said oh my God I I I think I have OCD so I called my friend Victor who thank you Victor for Having the courage to even tell me you had OCD you know I didn't have OCD yet but you told me you had the courage so I called you I said vic I think I have OCD he's like I have the right doctor for you and he connected me with Dr Andrew Schmidt who you'll hear from in a few moments and I spoke to the doctor and he told me one of the first things he told me is that one of the worst things to tell someone with OCD is that you're going to be fine right because that's something called reassurance and what someone what OCD needs is they need to learn to live with uncertainty I remember the first conversation I had with them I was in a bathroom in Florida crying to him that I didn't know what to do and that I just needed help so I started down that road with him and he Tau me so much he told me that you cannot run from Fear because it only grows we started to do exposures even actually before the exposures because the exposures are so hard exposures are when you expose yourself to the fear he had me right down the fear and what would happen if those fears happened even that was very difficult and then we started do exposures I would need to drive in my car sounds simple but for me it was difficult I would need to go to a meeting without going to the restroom I would need to hold a knife to my wrist in an controlled environment with him there I would need to go on a balcony which at the time was very very difficult for me I would need to take a packed elevator of people like that one when you go to the Port Authority with thousand people I had to take that on purpose I wasn't even going to forget a car and I'm taking that because when you go in there when you are exposing yourself the fear that thought is taking over your body you can't breathe but if you don't then you're living with it forever I needed to change my mentality from one a fear of the thoughts to accepting welcoming and wanting the thoughts right the they're just thoughts our mind thinks of things and I can't choose the thoughts we can't choose our thoughts but we can choose how we respond to our thoughts and I used to tell my mind bring it on baby do your worst we know that we can't control God and that nothing in this life is a given but I tried to get to a point where I had faith that not that the fears wouldn't happen but that even if they did I'd figure it out little by little I started to crawl out of this hole of fear that I was living in and really thank you doctor for helping me get there thank you Hashem for helping me through that still today there's times where I still think I'm thinking irrationally or inappropriately just last week uh I have a fear that my children will choke from eating food so I don't let my 5-year-old daughter eat without somebody watching her but just last week she was walking around the house holding cereal I said no honey you're going to finish eating the cereal here and when you're done you could go and play with your friends and then I turned to my friend I said you know is this is this rational or not they said you know what it really depends on what she's eating cereal she could eat on her own I said okay you know what honey you go eat eat on your own ironically this morning my wife came down and she saw my daughter eating a bagel on the on the table and she goes wow Daddy's letting Eat Alone yeah I heard I heard I was another but I uh I'm so grateful that I had this disease because because because I had it I learned to spot it and unfortunately I've had a bunch of different friends that come to me with varying symptoms and I'm like you probably have OCD and if I didn't have that disease I I wouldn't been able to help them cuz I would have no idea that it was OCD and not only that but OCD gives you tools for Life tools that you could use in every area of your life right tools like not running from Fear irrational fears running toward them and acceptance much of this speech I rode on a train many many years ago during the thick of the disease and I committed then that when I got out of it which God willing I would think Hashem I did that I would put on an event like this so that no one else would need to suffer like this and that they knew that they could get the help they wanted thank Hashem for bringing me to this point I'd like to invite Dr Andrew to speak and thank you again do job hello hello hello it is truly such an honor to be here I'm just humbled by the way everybody has shared their thoughts truly an honor to be here for that reason um my name is Dr Andrew Schmidt or just Andrew um I've been treating obsessive compulsive disorder for well over 15 years and I've been a psychotherapist for more than 20 years what you heard about tonight were three different people's experiences with obsessive compulsive and one of the reasons why I really wanted to be here was because it's such a misunderstood issue people don't understand what it is or as you've heard in the stories that were told tonight it gets misdiagnosed and um wrong treatment plans are suggested that end up doing more harm than good so I'm going to bore everybody for just a minute and talk about what is OBS obsessive compulsive disorder well it's made up of obsessions which we describe as intrusive thoughts that uh people find uh that cause fear anxiety or distress it's also made up of compulsions that's where people respond to the obsessions it's the thing they do in response to it these can be repetitive acts like washing your hands or checking a door or cleaning a or doing some kind of cleaning um or they can be internal acts like thinking certain thoughts to make sure everything's okay it's that connection between the obsession comes in and somebody feels like they need to respond to it that makes the syndrome what it is so to better explain it people are often they describe to me um just dealing with these intrusive thoughts that can sometimes last hours and hours per day they cause fear anxiety distress and of course some amounts of impairment now intrusive thoughts are normal everybody has them so what makes OCD OCD well it's when it starts to get in the way of life when it starts to be so distressing for you so the thought comes in and you can't control it you feel like it's taking over your life and it's causing you so much fear if you feel like you have to do something about it it causes you impairment you spend a lot of time on it that's when you know it's a problem and that's when it meets what we call clinical diagnosis of obsessive compulsive disorder um what you heard about tonight were many different types of OCD and I think it's really helpful to educate people on the different types you heard um some contamination concerns that's more the classic concern concern is about uh germs and cleanliness so people being very concerned with things being clean and uh to make sure that they don't get sick or their loved ones don't get sick compulsions that you see that go along with that are things like excessive cleaning um or excessive decontaminating and trying to make sure everything is uh clean and illness free so these are the folks that you might see who are like lysoling their phone wiping down door knobs doing all sorts of things to protect themselves from illness and protect their loved ones what we heard from a number of folks who spoke tonight was something called har OCD harmd are the intrusive thoughts that someone might cause harm to themselves or Worse harm to their loved ones or somebody else or that harm will be done to them or to their loved ones so the thought is the idea is they need to do things to keep themselves safe or keep their family safe it's awful to hear some of the stories that have been told I think of one of my very first cases in treating obsessive compulsive disorder it was a new mom who gave birth um to their child who was then later plagued by these intrusive thoughts that they were going to hurt the child these thoughts got so much in the way that the mom could not bond with their child they were so worried they were going to do something bad to harm their child in order to control those thoughts they would engage in all sorts of avoid avoidance they would hold the baby but not go near window and eventually and because they were fearful that they were going to throw their baby out the window it was that bad for them they eventually got to the place as the um sort of symptoms increased that they stopped touching the baby and stopped avoiding uh going and started avoiding going near the baby pretty terrible especially during new uh somebody who's newly BN born stops and gets in the way of the ability for the mom to bond with the baby unfortunately she told these symptoms to a social worker at a local Clinic the social worker was untrained and didn't understand what this was they misinterpreted it they thought that what they were they were describing was an actual intent to hurt their baby completely different misunderstanding the disorder they called CPS Child Protective Services which could have been awful and terrible luckily there was a very astute psychologist involved who was able to say what wo hang on a minute this isn't somebody who actually wants to hurt their baby they're avoiding going near their baby they're not going near windows they're taking actions to make sure that their baby doesn't get hurt and that's what makes it different from the mom who act or from the person who actually intends harm they're doing all sorts of things to make sure that they prevent the harm and that very astute psychologist was able to say hang on a minute this isn't harm this is obsessive compulsive disorder that person luckily got referred to me and I was able to explain to them what obsessive compulsive disorder was we designed a really good treatment plan what you heard described tonight was something called exposure and response prevention where the mom had to slowly face the thing that she fears and eventually hold the baby near the window facing the fear that she might do something terrible and learning that oh my goodness she can hold the baby and she might not do something terrible was just as likely people refer to it tonight is something called the doubting disease and that's absolutely true it's never being certain never being sure that everything is okay the examples you heard tonight they included um harm they included uh Perfection and maybe uh uh needing to do things really well there was also a need for Symmetry and exactness so getting things just right and the doubt was what if it's not just right what if it's wrong what if I read that incorrectly so the response to that is is going back to reread it going back to it to like check it to make sure that I did it uh harm was around avoidance another patient I work with who dealt with harm OCD um he'd be cooking with his wife and he got obsessed with this idea that during the cooking he might do something to hurt his wife so he'd be cutting vegetables and the intrusive thought would be oh my goodness what if I stab my wife with this knife they didn't want to do it it was the exact opposite they were so concerned that they were having that thought they started taking precautions to make sure that he didn't hurt his wife instead of cutting the vegetables he'd ask his wife to do the cutting because he couldn't trust himself so this is the thing about obsessive compulsive disorder is that it gets so misunderstood but I would trust people with OCD with all sorts of things because they are the ones taking such precautions to make sure that they do not cause on to make sure that they don't hurt others to make sure that they do it right or do it well and it's unfortunate that it's so misunderstood um because that stops people from getting the treatment that they need I hope that's a bit of an understanding about what obsessive compulsive disorder is other symptoms you want to talk about like the gay one or the religious one thank you yes super helpful um being reminded about the different subtypes and it' be helpful to talk about that so we've mentioned some of them and the classic subtypes as I said earlier is the contamination concerns that's the intrusive thought and concerns about illness and things being dirty or contaminated and the compulsions that follow are the cleaning that's the classic one the next one as we've been talking about tonight you heard many examples very common one as well as about harm it's that themselves will be harmed or their loved ones will be harmed which I referred to earlier the compulsions are doing things to make sure that everybody is safe then there's sexuality of OCD this one is a much tougher one for people to talk about it's considered more of the taboo forms because in involves something that's so difficult to talk about sexual OCD is where people start to have intrusive thoughts of um of a sexual nature that they find inappropriate or unacceptable so uh an example of that is somebody I worked with a man who was married happily married with Children who was having intrusive thoughts about their sexual identity they started to become obsessed with the idea that they might be gay and they started wondering oh my gosh am I gay so they would be with their wife who they were very much in loved with and started thinking oh my God wait what if I'm gay what if I'm with the wrong partner what if she's not the right one for me the compulsions that followed were trying to find that out trying to figure out if they were gay or not um so they would do all sorts of testing they'd be monitoring their arousal they'd be watching certain material in order to find out if they were gay and meanwhile it was these intrusive thoughts that they might be gay and the response to it was trying to figure it out that was really causing the issue got in the way of their marriage it got in the way of of of his ability to bond with his wife and it was only on seeking treatment that he was able to make peace with these thoughts without letting them be a barrier to the life that he had set up for himself now that doesn't mean some people might have thoughts about being gay and they might very well indeed be gay in this case the person was having the thoughts but it was incongruent with the way that they actually see themselves and in congruent with the way that they have been living their life other forms of OCD are something that we call religious OCD and the concern here is usually about making sure you follow your religion well enough making sure you do your religion well enough being sort of like the best Jew that you can be or the best uh follower of your faith things that you might see with that is like making sure you say your prayers just right saying prayers excessively to make sure that they are pleasing their God or being more in touch with their god um other concerns that you see with religious ocds are like following the Like rules of being koser just so making sure that they don't break any of those rules or following Shabbat in a very prescribed and prescriptive way it can be really debilitating because it actually moves people away from what they value and it's more about satisfying the wants or the needs of obsessive compulsive disorder satisfying the needs of OCD rather than doing something that brings them closer to God so these these are some of the uh Common forms of OCD that we hear about you heard about the need for Symmetry and exactness uh that really covers a lot of them if you identify with any of this if you're not sure if you have obsessive compulsive disorder if you're having intrusive thoughts that you find difficult to get out of your mind it's important to reach out to somebody and try to seek help uh the right diagnosis as you're sort of heard tonight A misdiagnosis can be very unfortunate and uh can really cause a lot of harm in people's life but reach out and ask for help because help is available again one of the reasons why I wanted to be here was because obsessive compulsive disorder is such a misunderstood disorder and disease and to be able to educate people about this and to help spread the word that what OCD is and more importantly there is treatment for it you can find relief for it you're not alone and that is why I truly wanted to be here tonight to help uh help people understand that so thank you so much for can I say can I ask oh can we can you say one thing yeah I had someone messag me on my way here they said oh no it's for it's for you I ask you someone uh someone messaged me on the way here and they said uh Vic I don't know about tuning in I've had OCD for 10 years and um I've been seeing a doctor and um it's still terrible and it's as good as I'm going to get if there's someone out there and maybe they've seeing someone you know maybe what do you we say to those people you know so unfortunate thank you for letting me know that not everybody responds to something called you heard the treatment was exposure and response prevention it doesn't work for everybody but it works for so many people and I can ask this a lot of uh often when people call hey Doc how long until this until I find some relief how long will it take for this to work and I can can't tell anybody how long it is for any one person but I can tell what the data show and on average it's anywhere from 17 to 25 sessions of doing exposure and response prevention so if you've been seeing a provider for years and years and years and your OCD hasn't improved well you should reconsider that talk with them about exposure and response prevention 17 to 25 sessions is the standard so I hope that answers what you're looking for yeah switch therapist or yes sop right possibly that talk about medication yes there are two line uh two front line approaches as I had mentioned exposure and response prevention that you heard a lot about tonight um and it's it's truly uh as long as I've been a therapist it's one of my favorite treatments to do because it's so darn effective to be able to say we have a treatment that works in 17 to 25 sessions is remarkable people spend years on the couch talking about this and getting nowhere because they're not doing the correct treatment that's many times what I and it's all natural yeah it's all natural I hear this often from people like hey I've been talking about this for 10 years doing all these other kinds of treatments nothing's working well that's because they're not doing the right treatment seek Erb thank you this man is an angel an angel from Hashem thank you so much for having me here and a pleasure to be here thank you the one the one type of OC didn't talk about which I know some people have is the social OCD which is around you know going to an apart party or wedding and and just being obsessed did I say the right thing did I did I say something inappropriate to this person uh and obsessing over the social aspects of things um so we we put we put this event together to really educate you so you could understand so you could spot these symptoms um for you for your family member for a friend for a child whoever it is we just want you to understand and to give you a place to turn to for help so by the end of the night tonight on our website free from OCD event.com you will have the numbers of the speakers here tonight as well as Simka is an organization in the community that helps with mental health you're welcome to call them they can help you get a doctor that takes Insurance um or you can call any one of us or the doctor directly his numberers there all calls are confidential and we are just here to help so I want to thank all the speakers for speaking tonight and for the courage and um thank you all for listening [Applause]