Mekudeshet Event - Full Coverage

has done this year, where your money is going, what the organization has intentions of doing in the future. That is the most critical thing. We're going to now ask everybody at the bar to please come sit down so we could officially begin the event. >> No, it's okay. We waited for 10:30, so give a chance for everybody to have coffee and get um get settled. I'd like to now call up the wonderful, wonderful host and hostess of this morning's event. Hi, how are you? I'd like to now ask I apologize. I'd like to now ask uh Julie and Stephen Montigu, the host and hostess of this morning's Modesa event to please come up. We'd like to thank you. We'd like to give you a small token of our appreciation for opening up your home, this beautiful, beautiful backyard. Rather David Roseri just came, Stephen, he said, "Wow, it's beautiful. We want and bless them to enjoy their home. So I'm going to uh mention I'm going to thank both of you on behalf of Rabbi Moshe >> Sha I'm sorry Rabbi Shaul well all the Has are wonderful Sha is wonderful Moshe who is the engine behind >> I'm sorry Sha Habber who is the engine behind alongside my cousin Kim Baba they together have founded this organization you're going to hear some of the statistics in a few minutes you are all going to be incredibly amazed what Modes has done what it plans to do it is one of the most vital vital critical organizations that was formed in the history of our community because of our youth, because of the young boys and girls that need to meet and they came up with this. They learned about it from another organization that proved it to be successful. They took from this model. Rab Sha is there day in and day out watching all of the all of the boys, the girls. You're going to hear from me some of the numbers. It's it's just startling to see how many young people have signed up to find their shadoo to find and really to go on a date. That was what Kim Amato go on a date get started and then from there we will see what is going to be. So um we have a small gift for you. >> I want to thank you again. We have this beautiful card for you which we're graciously thanking you for giving us your home opening up for the organization and uh that's beautiful. Kim has the greatest taste. Put it in your bar. enjoy it. And most importantly, most importantly to the Mont family, not just on behalf of my tradition, but on behalf of our community, we want to thank you for keeping up to your home every summer, for one institution, one organization or another. You're always there. The the most important thing is the community knows it can always count on the monthly family when asked. the way that Kim has to give us this opportunity to show I don't want to say show off actually to show off what is all about. The community needs to hear more about it. This is we thank you. Please enjoy the gift. Now I would like to call up the uh engine, the man Rab Sha >> who is behind. He's going to give us a little insight, a little review, a little recap. >> You want to do stats before? >> Okay, Rabbi, come closer because you're on deck, which is always a few minutes away. Kim would like us to give some of the stats, which I will do. And then the rabbi would speak. Rabbi David Ozeri is going to give us a keynote message on behalf of the community. Something he's been doing for many, many years, helping couples to find each other. Give me the stats. I will be more than proud. So in just in just a very very short time, two years, I want to give everybody some understanding of the power of starting a new organization, what it's capable of doing. You just have to believe. You have to trust and you have to know that their intentions and every dollar that we give them to support their intentions are going directly to support and help the institution. In this case today, it is on behalf of Mikuet. So here are some of the stats. 235 couples have gotten engaged. >> That's 470 singles. who found their match. Isn't that incredible? Here's a bigger one. Here's a bigger one. If that if that was a telltale sign, how's this one? Over 3,775 of our sphartic singles have signed up in the database of Modes. That's a big number and growing. More and more are coming on every day, every week. Now, I want to give you some conservative estimates. 70 to 100 new singles join me every month. At any given time, 80 to 95 couples in our community are going on a date. Something I touched on with Stephen and Julie. It's the biggest thing. Go on a date. Let them be open. And that's what Mikadett is telling them. We didn't ask you to get married. Don't book the hall. Go on a date and we'll leave the rest up to Hashem. You get along, you go on a second date. But they are the ones that are putting these couples together. And that to me, and it should be to all of you listening, watching throughout the community as you hear more about it should really be heartfelt about. That's a big thing. We've we've reordered more than 9,500 dates, including 2222 first dates. 6,800 plus parents have reached out to me. >> No, the other way around. We reached out to them. >> Oh, you know what? I don't care which way it goes. whether we reached out or they reached out to us. It would have been nice if they reached out, but I get that and I'm not going to touch on that because I understand how difficult it is for parents. So, Meet has reached out to 6,800 parents to ask them permission for their children to sign up and to enroll. And that's how we got to 3,755 and counting every single week. As I said, uh we we have made 4,800 plus introductions. Another great statistic. And we have 80 plus active matchmakers working every day or constantly adding mainstream people that you know. So let me touch on that and then I'll call up Rabbi Shaul. So, could you imagine having an army in our community of 80 qualified matchmakers that know exactly what to do? They know the people. They know their children. They know their families. They know more or less who would be good for who, who, which girl and which boy would more likely be good for each other. And we have them. We have 80 of them. Rabbi Shagul is overseeing 80 matchmakers. And they are from, as Kim would want me to say, which I knew already because we've spoken and spoken and spoken about Mikuha in the weeks past. They are from all walks of our community. I repeat, they are from every side and angle of our community. Therefore, we want to be able to capture as many of the young boys and the young girls, people come over to me. I tell them to get in touch with me. I tell them that they know exactly what to do for your daughter, for your son. So please everybody, let's give them our support. Let's give them our financial support. Let's give them our love and let them know that they are doing one of those vital critical jobs that this community has ever seen. I wish it wasn't two years, but it's only two years in counting. And we plan to stand here every year and update the statistics. And I believe it's going to be more marriages, more people enrolling, more parents being contacted, more families understanding. This is good. This is something that works. This is something that has been proven over the years. Positive Rabbi Sha make a running out of >> I'm sorry. I understand and I know where he has to go and I respect that fully. Ladies and gentlemen that have come here this morning that are watching and listening on any video channels. Rabbi David Ozeri would like to speak to us first. Good morning everybody. Ladies and gentlemen, um I'd just like to acknowledge for a moment one person that's first of all the Montigue family. Mrs. Montigue, where are you? Mr. Montigue, where are you? Where is he? How are you? Thank you very much. This is magnificent. You know, there's a there's a that says difficult is making a match like the splitting of the sea. So, it's very appropo. We're here today. We see that sea split. We know we're doing fine. Um I just like to acknowledge the presence of somebody who's here today. Jill, uh Kim called me up a few years ago. Said, "Rab, I have this idea. I'm so frustrated with how many singles there are in the community. I think we should start paying the uh the matchmakers. I think we have to make an organization. How do you do this? I said, it's simple. We get in touch with a man by the name of Rabbi Pagra has been doing this for years in the Ashkanazi community and they've made thousands of shidim. We made one phone call to Rabbi Pagra. He came down. He sat with kids. Rabbi Pagra, please wave your hand. Rabbi Pagro and uh he he has been a tremendous help to the organization. I just like to say the following. I'm not going to take up your time. It is something great in heaven to make one bas one shid. Do you realize that if you make one shid that can turn into a family of maybe five or six children? Five or six children will turn into about 40 or 50 grandchildren, 60 grandchildren. that will turn into a few hundred great grandchildren. After 120 years, we're going to go to heaven and they're going to show us hundreds of people. They say, "Yeah, you're responsible for this." You say, "You have the wrong guy. I don't know what you're talking about." No, no, no, no. You made a buzz. This is what came out from that buzza. It is not easy to make a shid. You sometimes are get so frustrated. You could be on the phone for weeks on end. They can go out 10 times, 12 times, and then all a sudden they break up. Where am I at? But is there for these matchmakers, constantly encouraging them, constantly sending them money? Now, we're not going to sit there and make let's face it. But you know what? If you support, you have made, you have made, you will get credit for it. I tip my hat to Rabbi Habber and to Kim Daba for everything that they done to this community. You know, some of these girls that they made was and boys, they're older, 28, 27, TWW, 30, okay? They would have never been able to get married without this organization. We have to understand that and we have to be there for them. And I promise you, if you do it, you if you support me, you will have in your life. Thank you. >> Before I ask Rabbi Schul to come up in one minute, Rabbi Zeri touched on something that that needs a little more elaborating on. Nobody should ever know the pain. Nobody should ever understand what it's like to have a daughter that's home after a certain age that he mentioned and then Kim raised a hand even older than 28 and 30 year old young ladies. So I have to tell you first I'll talk about the girls. There is no more difficult feeling for a mom and dad to know that their daughter didn't get married in her younger years. And there you have they do double time. They put every ounce of effort into trying to find that young lady or match. Now to the boys, what happens to them? God forbid, they can get lost. You got a boy 28, 30 years old and getting a little older, they can get lost. Different things can happen to them. And there you sign up, you get involved, you put them into the program, you leave it to the rabbi, you leave it to Kim, you leave it to Miku, and lo and behold, we're going to have miracles happen. Miracles happen. We cannot ever, this has been David, Rabbi David Roser's mantra for years now. We've come up and screamed about the older boys and the older girls that we feel we're leaving them behind. Now, Mikeshid says, "No one will left behind. No one will be unaddressed. Everybody's going to be addressed and they'll have an opportunity to go out and get on dates because we have the list of who's available and out there within our wider community. So, I had to touch on that because that to me is the most sensitive thing. I know it's the most sensitive thing to Rabbi Aeri. And you know, we get busy. We know about someone. We feel their pain. We go back to work. We go back to what we're doing. Go back to our lives. Everybody has a life. So there is Modes, there is Rabbi Shah, there is Kim, there's the organization, there's the structure that says we'll do this day in and day out every day of the year. Rabbi, Rabbi Shaul, we're so proud of you, your family, everything that the David family stands for. everything that you're doing for us. Hashem should give you the credit to be strong, to use your mind, to use your wisdom, to every day get more and more crafty about getting young and middleaged and everybody that wants a chance to go out and get married, like Reberi said, it multiplies and multiplies and we, our community, get the benefits and the fruits of your hard labor. you and Kim Dava and your team will never forget. You have a team and army behind you. No man is an island. You can't do it alone. Rabbi, >> ladies and gentlemen, yesterday made a basian girl and boy, the girl is 46 years old. She's getting married and she will have a baby. >> You took my whole speech. >> Come on. Okay, thank you for coming. I know that the weather is amazing and really there are other things you could have done today. So, we really appreciate it. >> Also, thank you to the host and hostess Stephen and Julie Mont. You were actually related and we used to walk I don't know if Stephen remembers but we used to walk home from Shaw together from Lawrence Avenue past his father's house. We walk home together also. I would like to thank our team, all the matchmakers and our the people that work with us. Every single person just has one thing on their mind and that is to do and to give and to help people and to focus on people. And if you looked at our texts throughout the day and WhatsApps and phone calls, you would know that there's really no time in the day that we're not all of us busy, whether it's even secretaries or matchmakers or whoever it is. I wake up in the morning, I have five texts at 5:30 in the morning about what are we going to do with this person? What are we going to do with that person? A story. There was a business conference with about 50 salesmen there and they had motivational speakers getting up and giving different motivational stories and things and trying to motivate the people. One man got up and he had a novel idea. He said, "I'm going to give $5. We're going to pair up. Everyone's going to pair up and we're going to do arm wrestling and I win. So, if you win five times, you'll get whatever the amount of money is. If you do 10 times, you get that amount of money. Five for each $5 for each time that you win. What happened? Everyone sat down 10 minutes. They arm wrestling each one. After they were done, one person, one group, okay, I won five. The other one says I won 10. One big guy got 20. And then there were two people who said we got 300 each. So everyone's looking at them. How'd you get 300? How'd you win? Everyone else got 510. How'd you get 300? And the answer was instead of fighting against each other, we just we made a deal. I'll let you win and you let me win. Instead of going against each other, we did it together. Instead of doing what normal people would do, which is to compete, we work together and we instead of doing getting winning five or 10, we exponentially won hundreds instead of five or 10. And if you look at our numbers, if you look at numbers, 237 engagements. And these are real numbers. They're not juiced up. They're the actual numbers that we send out every single day. Harry said 235. It's 237 because since he got his paper to prepare for his speech and made two more engagements 237 9,551 um dates and if you look at the numbers you have to say to yourself and we have 70 to 100 people adding themselves to our app every single month. How do you get numbers like that? And the answer is together. together with the rabbis, together with the teachers, together with the parents, the singles, and everyone that's here today supporting us, together with all of you. And when you do it together, you accomplish so much more. But in addition to a network that's not only sophisticated, confidential, efficient, we also care. And I think that that's the main ingredient to everything that we're doing cares about every single individual signal and their parent. If you talk to us, you call us, I think you would think, if you call one of our matchmakers, you would think that you were the only person that they were working on because the truth is we really, really, really care. I think I see people, you see someone who's single and, you know, you're dealing with hundreds of them. You think after a while you get desensitized and it's really not what happens. Each individual one, I can't even remember like my, you know, my cousin's names, but I'm remembering names of singles. Why? We look at them and we focus on them and we really really want to work with them. And I think that if you're here on one of the last Fridays of the summer and maybe one of the nicest Fridays of the summer, you care as well. And that is the number one ingredient. You care about the 26 year old girl who without a network of people working on her baby would not have gotten a phone call in a year or two. But now because of what we're all doing together, they're getting a phone call once a month, once a week, whether it's an actual idea that pans out or just someone that cares about them, it makes all the difference. Even a 19year-old girl who if not for a network working on her would would have had years of pain and someone calls her at 19 and stops it early gets her married and then she doesn't have to think about what would have been or will have let's say a 28-year-old boy who doesn't have enough confidence to go over to the right girls. So instead he's going over to the wrong girls. Now a matchmaker calls him and says I have someone perfect for you. She's healthy. Our family's good. We know everything about them. Try it. And the boy hates her. And this happens, I'm telling you, every single day, people who are not getting any ideas with the network that has, they're getting ideas for the 22 year old boy who needs guidance and sets them up with coaching. We cover that coaching and we set them up and we guide them. And instead of going aimlessly for years and getting nowhere, he gets set up at 22, 23, makes the right choice, makes a clear decision, and he gets married. And people often ask us, we ended 50 matchmakers at least in the past year. And very often, we'll get this question of what's your criteria of a matchmaker? And of course, I'm simplifying it, but the primary things we look for are you have to have time, energy, and you have to care. You could be from any walk of the community, any part of the community, mainstream, more religious, less religious, shabby, whatever you are. The one thing we're looking for is people that care and have time and want to be busy with this the entire day. At night, middle of the night, they're thinking, they go to weddings. Instead of hacking with their friends, they're looking at people and trying to find dates. It says, and I'm going to end with this week's I'm going to end with this thought. It says in this week's You have to go in all the ways of Hashem. A person is supposed to try to mimic the ways of and give the way Hashem does. And the tells us what does Hashem do the entire day says the Hashem sits and his he makes matches. Now, not all of us are matchmakers. So, we're not going to do that. I myself am actually completely not a matchmaker. I don't think I can set anybody up. I think I made one match in my life. But the truth is by supporting the organization and working in the organization you get that same thing of the you're doing what Hashem does. And let's just remember we do it alone. Each individual person we can make one match here, one match there. But if we do it together, we can do hundreds of matches and set up so many people and change their lives. Thank you. [Music] Heat. [Music] Heat. [Music] Heat. [Music] Heat. [Music] Heat. Heat. [Music] Heat. Heat. [Music] So, I got a phone call one day from one of your matchmakers. She just called me up and said, "Hey, what's up with Mono? I have a guy." And she said to me, part of this organization called Meesh. I said, "What is that?" >> Modes is such an important organization in our community. Community has grown in such number, but there's so many people that don't even know that the other one exists. >> We realized that there were people that haven't got an idea in months and we decided that we're going to we're going to try to tackle that issue. It's a tremendous organization that works very hard. Let's just say started. They knew that I have made many many marriages already in the community and something that really should be supported. It's a very important force. I was 38 years old when I got married. Knowing that I had somebody behind me helping me to find my correct spouse was the greatest gift that I could ever imagine. >> Working with it was very easy. From the time the shaan calls me to tell you the website, finding out information about the person, it was the comfort that she gave me, the advice, the I met the people that know him or I spoke to the people that know him. The whole experience of graduating is very beautiful actually because a person gets to know more or less their actual what are their dreams, what are their aspirations. Think about it in terms of what type of quality match do you want for your child and how will you find out about those qualities? >> In the past is you go to a wedding and it used to work and then recently in the past 10 years I would say people kind of agree with this that that slowly stopped working but it's because of people on their phones or people are shy or you don't know people are ready. >> Being set up is not just about a religious thing. It it doesn't matter what level you hold. It matters that you want to meet somebody and start a family. >> Matchmaking is as old as the hills and as current as today. We're a tight community. We want to remain a tight community. We want our children to marry the type of people that share our values. >> I would 100% recommend liquidation for my single parents or just single people out there in general. I think it's a great way to look into the person you're dating and you know the system is very easy. What we do is person enters their name right away within a day or two they get a phone call from one of our people and they discuss with them what the information they put in and they maybe give them a little bit of of advice within a couple of days. We can allocate them to one specific match. If they don't have an idea with them within a couple of weeks we change that to a different match. So, I got a call and say, "You don't know me. I know you." Um, and I'll be right back. I called my mom. I was like, "Do you know who this is?" She's like, "Oh, God. I grew up with this mother." >> Thank you. Thank you for helping me. Thank you for guiding me. Thank you for never leaving me. And thank you for finding my wife. Hashem, every is one of the ways Hashem is helping every part of life. [Music] Heat. Heat. [Music] [Applause] Rabbi Joey Her is coming up momentarily. I just wanted everybody to know all the money that we've raised, all the money that's being donated today and that will be donated is in baby Sophia Marit Jada, a little six-month old baby girl that passed away a few days ago. We want to give her the strength and the support of knowing we will not forget her. We love her and we're going to do a lot of and a lot of beautiful things that we've done in a memory to remember her Rabbi Joey Aba. We're honored to have you please come up to speak to us on behalf of Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Good morning and thank you very much for having me here. This is a beautiful setting to the Montigue family. I only have filled this home with happiness and but I don't know if everyone back here understands what pain looks like and what pain sounds like. I'd like to describe it with a brief thought. Everyone here heard of Rifka? Do you know where in the Torah she passes away? You look hard enough, you won't find it. It doesn't say that she passed away. Saiu is a whole story. If doesn't say there's one word that talks about her nurse passing away and Rashi says this alludes to the fact that also passed away and she asked this powerful question. I don't understand this one about matriarchs. Why does it the Torah tell us and she says here's why. Because had a child named he wasn't a good man and we were afraid that people would talk when she passed away. This is the woman who gave birth to they would curse her. So in order to avoid that curse, the Torah hides it and doesn't tell us our passing. Now I have a question. I understand she had a challenge. Sai also had a challenge. She had a lot of challenges. She was in world wars. She was taken from her husband twice. She didn't have a kid till she was older. Why? Why s we glorify and we hide? And I think the answer is very real. There are some challenges in life that when you overcome those challenge, you're a conquering hero. You got thrown a curveball. You dealt with it. You deal with it well. Wow. People talk about you heard the story. You heard his before. You heard the after. Wow. And then there are challenges that you're embarrassed of. If man was challenged, why she's embarrassed? She's lonely. She's dealing with it alone and therefore she doesn't want anyone to know the pain of a single girl is not the kind of pain our community had 30 or 40 years ago for the most part is a modern current new pain and it's probably the most common and most difficult pain in our entire community and I get a lot of calls and a lot of texts and a lot emails every single day and they're about all different kinds of issues. But by far and away, the group that's two phones, this one and this one, the group that's emailing and texting and calling are single girls. I haven't gone on a date in two years. My two younger siblings got married and I'm alone. And until now, we had no answer for them. We would tell her, "Okay, go to a party on Sunday, get drunk before you get there, and maybe that'll attract the boy. Maybe if you go to some island for seven days in the middle of the winter, maybe something good will happen. You got seven days. By the time you're home, it's over for 6 months." That's what they're told. Until enter, Hashem gave us the gift that is mikuh. The is there for every girl and for every boy so that no person feels this pain of being alone. And sometimes a matchmaker calls with a good idea. Sometimes it's not the best idea. But next thing you know the next idea is awesome. Only takes one. So someone throws at you three prospects. Two of them are not relevant. One of them is a good idea. You go on four dates and it didn't work out. Okay, there's hope. Two months later, you go on another five days at least to another five days, another 10. Next thing you know, you're married and you have a family. They told you that we just saw already had a baby. It's unbelievable what could be done. There's no stigma. It's gone. I'll tell you the stigma. The stigma is 28 years old and feeling like nobody cares. The stigma is feeling like I haven't gone on a date in three years. The stigma is here like everybody else is building houses and building lives and I am completely alone and irrelevant until Mikesha came along and said your pain is our pain. Your struggle is our struggle. Your future is our future. Your hope is our hope. Your dreams are our dreams. And the work that they've done and it's hard work. That's why people need to be compensated because it's hard work. You get burnt out by doing this. It's so hard because when you're talking to a girl that's in pain and you're talking to a boy who's nervous about what it costs to live in this community, you have a lot of back and forth and I don't know and I'm not sure and maybe I'd have to call my rabbi and my sister, my brother, my mother and then I have to call my rabbi again and then I'm not sure. My friends tell me that I shouldn't maybe I should be nervous about this one. It's so much by making it organized, by creating a database, by focusing on each people individually, by caring, by taking care of the matchmakers to make sure they can get it done, by making sure that this is something that happens. No matter which school you graduate from in this community, Mikuan is for you. I don't care what your religious level is. Doesn't matter how you observe Shabbat. Do there's 100 different levels in this community. It could be any one of those 100 levels. Idea of having someone call you up and say, "I have a suggestion. There's a boy for you. There's a girl for you." Do some research. Don't just meet her somewhere and try to hope that you get the right girl. Do some research. Ask five people. Call their friends. Call their rabbi. So now when you're going in, you're already going in with confidence. If this works, this is something I'm so excited about. The number one pain in this community is the pain of the sickness. And this morning, with everyone's participation, we have the chance to alleviate that pain. Don't let go of this incredible responsibility on you and on me. Thank you.