Elul Preparation (Ep. 340)

Hi, this is David Alowski and welcome to the Rabbi Alowski show. [music] [applause] It's so nice during the summertime we get a more of a live audience [laughter] and whether you're watching with our friends and producers uh with Torah anytime or uh wherever you watch or listen to your podcast, we're always uh happy to have you along for the experience. And uh you can call up on uh uh Torah any time to listen to this sharim. But apparently they started a Rabbi Olowski hotline directly 6053134799 where you can also leave voicemails and uh uh producer Ari sends me all of the copies of the voicemails. I listen to all of them, but I don't know who you are or what your phone number is or how to respond to you or anything like that. But I am listening to everything that you say and it's apparently only 30 seconds, so people sometimes have to leave like five or six little messages in order to finish their thoughts, but I listen to all of them. Just want you to know. Um, and uh, what else? Uh, the merch store. Yeah, raviolowski.commerch where you can buy various things and of course our latest [laughter] latest item which was asked for by the seabore. Yeah, hunk if you're a Rabiolski crazy. Yeah. And of course my some of my children were absolutely mortified that they put a picture of me that are going to be going on people's cars. [laughter] But I have no cover whatsoever. you know that about me already. I I don't I don't care about that. And and fet I said that um uh the uh uh you know people put up pictures of Gdole in their houses. So what's so terrible if they put up a picture of me on their car? [laughter] A lot of people live in their car. What do you think of that? [laughter] who was the rebi of the he was the gabi and the b and the gaba gaba and the shamish in the shaw that those were the only positions he would accept he wasn't a r or a shiva and he would teach anybody who wanted to come and learn and couldn't afford it so uh so a person came to him and said look I don't have a pinosa I want to sell pictures of you can can I take a picture you know I don't know if it was a picture or a painting and sell them and he was like yeah >> [laughter] >> I didn't care, you know, make make a few dollars off of it, you know, why not? Um, I I have a book that I didn't write. A number of people have read it and have told me how much they enjoyed it. I I never read it. It was called the last uh it was called um uh everyone's entitled to my opinion. People said, "What a clever title." I said, "I didn't make up the title. Art school made up the title." Yeah. Um, a fellow by the name of Rab Gindi said he's learning in Kyle and he wants to put out a book of my Tyra to help him support himself in in Kyo. I said, "Sure." And my kids were like, "Did you read it? Do you know anything about it?" I said, "No, what do I care?" [laughter] He says, "But who knows what they wrote?" He goes, "Listen, I'm not worried. You know, I have no reputation to protect. There's nothing I I have to really worry about. You know, you're you're my people. So, you know who I am already. Flaws. You know, you know all my flaws and all my shortcomings. So, it doesn't really make a mistake. So, I don't care. That's why Yadlaim asked to uh to uh interview me about the challenges I had. You know, I spoke about growing up with uh you know um learning disabilities and things like that. So, we like tish to talk about people with difficulties. So, okay. My brother calls me up and said, "Mom and dad abused you." I said, "What?" He says, "They're advertising Revolvski speaking about his abusive childhood." I said, "That's not what I talked about. I talked about dealing with learning disabil." [laughter] So I I I wrote to them and I said, "This is I mean, my nephews are getting calls. Oh, you was your father abused also?" [laughter] So they said, "Okay, we'll change it. We'll change it." But of course it went out already, you know. So someone said, "Didn't you check with them?" I said, "No, I I sat down and I talked and I don't know what people do with it afterwards, you know." So uh I really should be a little bit more on top of these things, I think. [laughter] Okay. Um uh oh, there's still a contest going on. Uh you if you take a picture of your bumper sticker, yeah, on your car or wherever it happens to be, uh send it to [email protected] and the winners will get a shout out. I guess that's the contest yet. And then of course, buy me a coffee. My gosh, as I've already mentioned, I haven't slept in weeks from all the coffee that people have been sending me. And you go to buymeacop.com/rabiolowski. I think we got through most of it. And uh as you can tell, I'm back in front of my bookcase and uh I'm back in um my last two podcasts were uh in my daughter's house in uh in Farakawway, but now we're back with our usual uh videographer Yakob Schlommo, who is uh always here on jolly on the spot doing uh such such quality work. In fact, there was one week we couldn't get him and someone else came and somebody were complaining about the quality that it wasn't up to its usual standards. So, Hashem, we're back. We got our bookcase. We got Yakob Schlommo. We've got you. We've got everything. What more could we ask for here in Shal Kodesh? In fact, um I'm going to be filming some question answers at the end. Then somebody asked me about, you know, going to other places when instead of Austral often times have opinions about things that I like to share. One of them is I don't like it when people say often. It's often [laughter] because otherwise the joke in Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan wouldn't have been fun. you know, it wouldn't be it wouldn't be a joke because uh the pirates of Penzance were orphans and so uh they um uh they would never attack him. It was orphans. So every boat that they captured was manned entirely by orphans. [laughter] So So the major general who they captured, you know, he says the pirates of Penzance, he goes, "Let me ask me, do you know what it is to be an orphan?" And they go, "Oh no, here we go again. >> [laughter] >> I say, "Do you know what it's like to be an orphan?" And they go, "Yes, often." Goes, "That's right. An orphan." You see, you see, so he meant yes, we often know what it is to be an orphan. And if you pronounce it often, then the joke doesn't work. So, just going to throw that right out there. Thank you very much. Okay, we have a sponsor this week. I got so much to talk about back in ter. Let's uh let's talk about our sponsor uh which is sponsored by Lynn and Graceman. This sponsor is dedicated on my memory. This is Lynn's father. Uh memory of my father Ben whose is Zion of my father lived a long and meaningful life one centered around Yiddishkite. Well, how appropriate that you are sponsoring a Rabbi Olowski podcast in his memory because that is our one message. That's we we say it many different ways. Uh Rabi Turski uh I don't know how many books he wrote at the time when I heard this quote. He said, "I've written uh 28 books, but I really only wrote one book 28 times. They're all about self-esteem, you know." So we we've had uh uh this is our 340th podcast and they all have the same theme. Be close to and live a meaningful life like your father Benel. Even while maintaining a demanding accounting practice and teaching accounting, he remained steadfast in his commitment to Torah and the community. You know, it's an amazing thing. This this used to be called Abalabus. Balabas is a person of work, supports his family and sits in and learns. You know, if Noah Weinberg said his father was a businessman, he says, "But I never saw him sleep in a bed except Shabas. He would he would be learning at the table. When I came in in the morning, he was learning at the table. I learned the whole night, you know." So, uh, so a boy writes to he says, "During, how much am I to learn? So he says, "Well, during the benzim you have the dinner of Balabuz, you know." So uh he says, "So Balabuz only has to learn nine hours a day, you know." So he writes back, "I don't do that when I'm in yeshiva during the Zman." [laughter] So yeah, there was a time my friends um he he faithfully attended participated in Shirim, devoted himself to Torah learning and was actively involved in community service, cherished his family. May have an aliyah. And we should all understand that whatever we say this uh this podcast is uh that applies to the Torah and everything else. Listen, one can argue we don't only speak Toryra over here. That's for sure. We always speak Tory tora, but we don't only speak Tyra. We talk about other things. But everything we talk about is aik. That's why I do this podcast because people need today. So all of the that cla getting should be in his memory. Dear Rabiowski, thank you for your wonderful podcast. I truly look forward to each episode. I deeply appreciate your authenticity, your unique ability to blend profound Torah with humor, and your willingness to stand up for what is right, even when it's not the popular opinion. I know because I'm too stupid to know the difference. [laughter] I'm like a little child who just says whatever pops up into his mind, you know. And somebody said to me once, I see every now and then you stop and think, should I say this or not? And I don't know why because you're going to say it anyway. So I don't know. You waste everybody's time. [laughter] It's true. I don't have a filter. I don't I I call it as I see it. Yeah. Um, I also enjoy the lighter moments, your recipes, your memorable pes cleaning tips. Listen, all of this is part of Yiddish. You know, I I found at least six places in the where he talks about foods that we eat uh at different times and why. So, food is very significant. You know, a woman said to me once, you know, you think you think I just I'm a cook in the house. I do. making food for my family to be give them give them nutrition and and you know things like that to to be able to help them uh you know have the have the strength to go on. Yeah. Um my wife really one of her specialties is she makes a tuna casserole but uh she wasn't feeling well so I made it. So since since we just mentioned recipes maybe I'll just throw it out there. Um, you cook pasta, cook it al dente, right? Which means you do it on the dente. [laughter] Means you don't cook it till it's like mushy. You know what I mean? Well, it's still a little firm, you know? And uh then you drain it and you leave it in the pot. You add milk and uh you add cheese and you add tuna fish. Yeah. And like for a package of noodles, we add two pack two cans of tuna fish. Um, how much milk? You have to you have to get a good feel, you know. And cheese, too, you know. Don't be stingy on the cheese. And, uh, salt, pepper, garlic powder, and paprika. Not too much paprika. And, uh, and then you heat it up on the stove top and stir it up until it becomes nice and gooey. And it's a fan favorite. Everybody enjoys it. Very easy. and uh file that one away for the next time the nine days come around. Um I always enjoy the lighter moments, your recipes, your memorable PES cleaning tips, though I'm happy you finally got to open the Olowski family Pesak Hotel. Hopefully, we're going to do it again this year. We're trying to find a hotel. I We were able to sell 150 rooms um in the hotel. They took some for themselves. We sold 140. That was before the war hit. Then when the war hit, a lot of people cancelled. We had to rebbook. But but by Tubishvat, we had a had the whole place sold and a waiting list of another 140 people. Means we could have filled two hotels. So we're looking for a better location that meets our obligation and our needs and uh to provide for you. So we will keep you posted about that. But since she mentioned it, I feel like I should mention it. And the personal stories you so generously share. So I'm happy that I share my stories. My children are not always so happy. [laughter] People meet them and go, "Were you the one who are you the one who?" And so uh what can I tell you? But to be fair, we are a family of oversharers. You know, we uh there are people who play everything very close to their chest. And well, our our branch of the Olafskis are not like that. May Hashem grant you and your family many healthy and happy years. And may you continue sharing your Torah wisdom, humor with Clay Israel, Lynn and Gman. Thank you so much. And uh and it's great to be back. Great to be back in. and getting ready getting ready as we come to the end of bay manim and I've always felt it's a slightly melancholy bay manim because if you are in yeshivas then you know there are three bay man uh from uh after yam kipper under and uh uh that close to three weeks and from tishab until the month of Nissan and uh the one ben and in Nissan you don't say not because it's ben but just because in after yam kipper and and during Nissan for different hokic reasons. We don't say um we don't say tman. This is the only bman where we're still saying. So, uh there's there's something about this Benazman that's a little more melancholy and uh and we're coming out of tishab and uh the we're still we're still feeling the effects of the three weeks of the nine days of the of the of tishab of the it carries over a little bit. colors us. You know when in tre you're coming out of uh Russashana muva yum kipper you're going into sukis it's you may sim yeah and uh and in nissan of course you're coming out of pur and you're going into pes and you know all the simka that's that's associated with that and here it's uh you know just hot it's hot It's long. People eat barbecues. Nothing in a barbecue that you should eat. You know, if you use real charcoal, it's even worse. You know, [laughter] we use a grill. When you use actual charcoal, you get all the smoke inside of it. You know, and uh you know, hamburgers and French fries and potato salad. And yeah, there's nothing there that you should be eating. [laughter] Yeah. Corn. Corn. If you want to grill the corn, that's probably okay. I see they do that now. That's uh that's very uh very in, you know. Um I don't know if you I think some people grill the watermelon, but I think you could just eat it. It's it's it's nice and juicy and sweet and but uh you know you you're into this whole mode and you come out of it as we come to the end and we go into roesh l this week l so I want to speak a little bit about el um as we approach it somebody said to me on tishv I have trouble relating to tishab. And I said, well, yeah, because what did you do during the three weeks to prepare for tishab? You suddenly boom walk into tishov. Of course, you're not going to be prepared. Yeah, there are people who have the min all year that when before they bench they say al-n but certainly people who don't they usually will say it by the sudafis on tishab just before tish in their benjon say but you understand that if you say at least during the three weeks you'll be preparing yourself there are certain people who don't say all year where they get up at midnight to be able to you know say you know uh on the and the destruction and the rebuilding of the temple but at least during the three weeks they try to at least during the nine days but uh we managed to work around a lot of these things so they stop playing music well no of course they don't stop playing music they stop playing music with instrumentation But you can uh get today all this ac cappella stuff and and people are um recreating the sounds of music. You know what I mean? So to the untrained ear, it sure sounds like music. [laughter] And that's why uh I'm I'm not pasining everybody should go to their uh their own particular pisk you know for this but I have heard the psak that it's better to listen to slow sad or deacy music even if it has instrumentation than to listen to ac cappella because why in the world do they make an odi shama you know to uh to ac capella where you can sing oji shama wedding song only everyone's just singing it with their voices. The the whole big problem with music is it's going to get you to dance and and that's what oji shama is for masha if you're listening to you know um you know dus you know which it doesn't have too many like really you know rocky songs over there you know so that even if you're listening with the mil with the music uh so I know I So people granted they were working in Kira who uh rebu told them they could play guitar during the nine days and make a kumz for them. That's not the problem. That's not the problem when when we're talking about music, you know, and uh and if it if it's music that that helps you understand and appreciate it. Yeah. Um, personally I've always felt that elit is a little too upbeat. We sing at the end of tish elit. So, okay. So some places they mamish do it more like a durge but other places like yeah it shouldn't sound like that. I'm not a musician and I don't really understand music. It's one of the many things I don't understand. Yeah. I don't understand business. I don't understand physics. I don't [laughter] there's a lot of stuff I don't understand. But I'll talk about anything. I don't care. But someone just said to me on tishab that musically um elite is similar to the khazar shots that we say on the show I don't know I don't know I don't know from the music but he was trying to explain to me the notes that are being used in the way it's like okay kenzine but Um uh but uh we had somebody laying the migilla I have my little schul here um laying migillas and I was surprised how close it sounded to McGill's Esther. It's uh you know again I'm not a musical person but the the the overlap was much more dramatic. Yeah. I guess it depends really on who's laning it and and how you're how you're saying it over. But you know, it makes sense to me because the person who did the laning for us is uh the very Rabbi Khadar Molen and he's written many many sim. So I guess even his a sounding a little bit like Miguel's Esther but in Miguel Esther there are a few sukum that you read to the tune. I guess you can switch back and forth a little bit to it. But um uh it's uh um it's it's that that time where you're you're coming out of uh of that experience. So if you've spent the three weeks and the nine days appropriately. So then you go into tishov and it's part of a context. But if you've been spending your 3 weeks listening to ac capella and basically doing whatever you want and even though you're not supposed to buy new clothes and new things during uh the three weeks, but there's a heter if it's a da oven. So what happens? All the clothing stores make sales during the three weeks, you know, and they say, "Oh, okay. So it's a bargain. It's a bargain. So I have a head to go and buy it you know and and you know so you you manage to work around a lot of it and then you come to uh then you come to the nine days so you can't can't uh can't eat meat can't drink wine so uh it's okay there's you know I've said this beforehand that you know my wife likes to read all of the uh the firm publications me not so much the only thing I like you know, the recipe sections and uh and they'll have you, you know, an enjoyable menu for the nine days, [laughter] milking treats, you know, and I'm like, I don't think that's the idea exactly. [laughter] Make the nine days as enjoyable as possible. The whole reason we're not eating meat and drinking wine is because and so we're trying to minimize the so we're trying to make the milk into something. Of course, today, you know, they have this thing called impossible meat where you can get yourself a burger, you know, that's not really meat but seems like it's meat. Uh, one of my son-in-laws who is a meat afficionado said we were someplace and he got an Impossible Burger and he says it mamish tastes like a hamburger, you know. Um, I've never found that about soy dogs, you know, which are supposed to taste like hot dogs. Um, but it actually to me tastes like what you would feed to the cow before you made it into a hot dog. But um you know Dy were doing so. So I I remember I was talking about when when I was learning for and we hadn't went down to a schllock house you know. So at one point as they there was a whole row of heads and they just put the heads on these little hooks and somebody's coming by and cutting off the skin that that I guess they used to make um gloves or whatever they use from that that leather, you know. So I said, 'What do they do with their heads? And every Don looks at me and he says, "You never had cold cuts. Where do you think it comes from?" [laughter] So So uh that did damper my appreciation, you know, at least for Israeli uh products, you know, because at least in America, they grind it up a lot. you don't really realize that, you know, it's a head in there or whatever. [laughter] But, um, in Israel, they keep it more or less more solid. It's crunchier. [laughter] You slice open a salami and there's an eye, you know, and then it winks at you. You know, it's like it's a whole different experience. But um you know you you you you [clears throat] manage to avoid feeling any from the fact that you can't have bos that's besides the fact of all the people make sum. Now I remember when I used to write columns in the hamia I spoke about this and how people who are trying to make sum they work their way around the mess of nine days and I got a number of letters from who sayim dapka tried to make sum during the nine days to have meat you know to uh to mitigate the the ts of the nine days. Yeah. So um so I said oh okay I didn't know you know um and I was just now uh in Paracway I told this story uh two podcasts ago and I went to Davin by the Boston Reba and he announced that during the nine days they hopefully will be having every night I see him. So uh so there there is such a concept over there. I'm talking about there was a restaurant in Manhattan where they used to have a CM every hour for everybody who wanted to come to their flesh restaurant and then enjoy their meal. That's certainly not a seabboard joining together to make a sem in my opinion. I don't know. I'm not here to disparage. I heard say that by the time you work around everything and of course when I was a kid you you didn't bathe during the nine days shabas but otherwise you didn't bathe during the nine days and uh now of course people say well times have changed you know so for hygiene hygiene you have to wash you have to bathe you so somebody on one of my online shirum she said actually heard from a RV. If you normally shower every day, shower every other day. If you normally shower every second day, shower every third day. If you normally shower every third day, you should really shower more often. [laughter] Okay. So, it's different today. It's different today. You know, there there there was a time when people didn't shower all the time. I don't know if you ever heard this expression, you know, they would take a bath Saturday night, you know, and they would fill up the big tub and they would soak. I once heard from Yis Rosen Bloom that, you know, he says, "I was staying someplace. They only had a bathtub." And to me, that's like soaking in your own juices. you know, like when you serve the gravy with the with the meat or just, you know what I mean? [laughter] The shower washes away. I I don't happen to agree as far as that goes. I think that if you really take a good bath, it's it's uh you know, it can get you much cleaner. Of course, you should shower off afterwards. That's uh as far as that goes. But because I have to take a shower, you know. So, someone said to me once, "How do I know if I'm showering for hygiene or if I'm showering for pleasure?" And I said, "If at any point during the shower, you do this. That's not hygiene anymore. When I came to it, when we were first married, 1982, we had a half bathtub with a with a spritzer, you know, that's all there was was a spritz. There was no nothing. And what you did is you spritzed yourself off because there was not much hot water. So you would like wet yourself all over. Then you would turn it off. Then you would soap yourself off. Then you'd rinse yourself off. That was called a shower. But this thing where like Americans can turn on the shower and just, you know, for 20 minutes. Okay. That's that has nothing to do with hygiene. That is uh that is called bathing for pleasure. Yeah. >> [snorts] >> And um I know uh Shabas Shabas Shabas in the vision it's mikvah so they turn the temperature down on the mikvah that it shouldn't be so warm. Yeah. Um on Shabashua they turn it up so that you can boil out all the imperfections remove all the ble of is that might be inside. And those who survive have a very meaningful yum kipper. [laughter] Sometimes you walk into these things and not only they so hot, but there's been so many people in them that by the time you go in it's murky, you know, and you think, gosh, just throw in a carrot and a couple of onions and you got a soup over here. [laughter] There's a gross thought. Focus on that one. I don't know. I made some reference and someone said, "Oh, that's really gross." I said, "Okay, how about this one? How about a mikvah soup?" [laughter] And does anybody else find it ironic that they sell dips at the mikvah? I don't know if this happens in America, but here in Israel, they often sell kalas and dips outside. And I'm thinking, you go in for a dip and you pick up a dip and I don't know if you go to the big bells shaw, they have a whole mol outside and uh and I saw also in uh in Tavaria where we were. So um uh sons has a big mikvah also a home call it selling everything there [clears throat] prepared food I all kinds of things it's h wow you get whatever you want to go for a dip go and pick up a dip you know and I don't know what that does with the concept of no double dipping but anyway I don't get involved so uh uh so I've mentioned this beforehand for men going to the mikvah is like sort of a social experience experience. You know, after I had my heart operation, he said to me, "You can't go swimming, you can't take a bath, and you can't go to the mikvah." I said, "Can I go to the mikvah if I don't go in the water?" So, he was like, "Why?" I said, "You know, just for the experience, you know, everybody hanging out, you know, little male bonding going on, you know, [laughter] but anyway, uh all of this was by way of introduction. So we're going to go into rashash shana and people have the same exact problem with rashash shana comes tea shifa and they're supposed to be moved by the tea shifa but they're not because they didn't do their ll preparation and you have to spend an entire month of l preparing yourself for rash and yam kipper and if you miss the preparation it can still be effective, but it's going to be less effective because the more time you put in preparing, the better you're going to be. You know this when it comes when you were when you were a student or if you are a student because we do have a lot of younger uh people who listen to this podcast in spite of the fact that the fellow who gave me my award from Tony Times said all the young people are listening to Joey Haber and they're not listening to me. But I know there are some of you out there. So anyway, [laughter] in fact, somebody said to me, "Nah, that's because all the young people live who listen to 246, you know, and uh you're on 246." So I said, "Oh, okay. That's that's why my young numbers aren't on tour anytime." [laughter] But anyway, but uh you know that the more time you spend preparing for a test, the better you're going to be when you take it, you know. If if you're ready for it, when we came to Harrisi beforeh offered us the Torah, he offered all the nations of the world and he went to as said he went to Torah at you know Moab and he went to every nation of the world and offered them the Tory first and when he comes to us we already knew the answer and Ishma. So how did we know how to give the right answer? because we were prepared. Because we spent 210 years in Egypt and 7 weeks in the midbar preparing for this, we knew what we were doing. We were setting ourselves up for just this moment. And people who don't think about what I'm going to do when that moment comes. Um there's a uh comedian John Panette, the late John Pette. It was very heavy and he did a lot of a lot of jokes about food. Yeah. And uh and uh anyway, he says, "I get so frustrated by these people who walk into McDonald's and they're looking at the menu. It's McDonald's. They haven't changed their menu in 70 years. [laughter] There's burgers, there's shakes, there's fries, you know, just order it and get out of the way. [laughter] And if you can't get out of the line, go and look at it." So, as they go into KFC, they're trying to decide it's chicken. All they have is chicken. There's five pieces, there's 10 pieces, there's 20 pieces. Just order the chicken and get out of the line, you know. So, uh I see this in in pizza places, you know? You go into a pizza place. They also haven't changed their menu since the Yum Kippa war. You know what I mean? You see all the grease on the on the on the board up there. They're serving the same exact things. And somebody finally gets to the counter and goes, "H, what should I have?" I usually get uh two slices in a soda, but maybe I should try a cowzone. I'm not sure. You know, why don't you think about this beforehand? You know, so the more preparation you put into it, the easier it will be when that moment comes. I've said over this vert on the occasions when I am a cohane at a pigeon ben not too often there was a time when nobody wanted me to be the cohen at their son's pigeon ben because I had eight daughters and they were afraid I wouldn't give the baby back so they didn't want me to be the co but actually you know there are certain kohanim um the villagian said the rapper ports Um, Rapaort, by the way, uh, is actually Roof Portos. Portos, which was the main city in Portugal before Lisbon. Uh, that's where Port Portugal gets his name from, was from Portos and and the port wine, which comes from Portugal. So, uh, he he was the doctor in Porto. So, it's roof portos. That's what rap is. But apparently they are. So here in why is anyone gonna take somebody like me you know when they can take somebody who's got back to the second base of mikdash you know but on those rare occasions when uh I am the cohain so I [clears throat] point out the first thing we say is uh the father says you know this is my firstborn son and I have a mitzvah to be ped to him and the cohain then says what would you prefer the baby or to give me five shackles. Which one would you prefer? And uh and I I think it's a you know kind of strange question. Yeah. But uh I said I think it's a good thing for a parent to say yes, I want this kid. [laughter] The longest laugh on radio was on the Jack Benny show where he was outside of a party and a guy sticks him up and he says, "No, no, no. I'm not really here. I'm inside of the party. I just came out for a breath of fresh air." You know, he's trying to convince him that he shouldn't be robbing him, you know. But finally, the guy says, "Your money or your life." And Jack Benny, who played a character who is extremely stingy, goes like this. Anyway, he just is sitting there thinking it was the longest laugh. And finally he goes well he goes I'm thinking [laughter] but you know it it shouldn't be a question what do you do right how how you react um it's interesting when I give my uh you know my opening class for you know most groups that I speak to for the first time I have this thing called why be Jewish why why should a supposed to be a Jew. And uh I tell a story about this girl who was wrestling with intermarriage. Should she intermar or not? Etc. So I said, "Why not intermar?" And she says, "Cuz my Judaism is important to me." And I said, "What does that mean?" And she couldn't answer the question. And I asked her the question that from Jews have learned from the time that they're little. What would you do if someone puts a gun to your head and says convert or die? She had never heard the question. And she thought about it and she finally said, I would let myself be killed. And I said to her, Neb, you broke up with the man you love. You prepared to die for something and you have no idea what it is. But if we ever find ourselves in that situation, we've thought about it. Halai will have the strength to do it. You know, uh there's a typhus that says were willing to be thrown into the fiery furnace rather than to bow down to an idol. But if they were being beaten, they would eventually have broken from from the torture. And yet we've seen throughout history yidden who have stood up to the most horrible tortures and didn't give up their uh their yiddishkite. But when the moment comes, we know what to answer. So we say to a parent, okay, you've had 30 days now to think about it. You want the kid, you know, or would you rather say, "You know what? You take the kid. I just spent 30 days keeping this and he's got collic, so forget about it. You could have him." [laughter] I said, "I think it's a healthy thing for a parent to say, "Yes, I want this kid." [laughter] So, I grew up that generation, you know, where parents would say, you know, you're not even my kid. The gypsies left you at the at the doorstep, you know, and I would go Hey. [laughter] Anyway, my mom didn't know what to do with me. Anyway, so uh and my parents didn't abuse me. No matter what Yadlim says, [laughter] they they uh they were just, you know, parents who were born in the 1920s. [laughter] That's that's what they learned in parenting school. You know, they used to tell you go out and find the biggest book on, you know, modern child rearing you can find and when you have a problem, hit your kid with it. [laughter] But there was a time like that, you know. So abusive. Anyway, so uh uh but if you don't prepare, you're going to go in and rush up and the Kbar is going to ask you a question. Do you deserve another year of life? But take a month and think about it. Well, go home and think about it. We all know the famous story of Amndon within the son of Tok where he was trying to get him to convert and he says, "Give me three days to think about it." And he was horrified that he had those three days. You know, how could I have even suggested for a moment? But uh but if people don't anticipate what the question is, I I have been teaching how to answer basic questions for many years. I taught it in rebbitical training courses. I taught it in other organizations. And I remember at one point one of these uh counselors or advisers at a particular program, they said, "I feel like you don't have any questions, like you're not bothered by any questions." I said, "Sure, I am just not the ones you're asking cuz I've thought about those." When I decided to become from at the ripe old age of 12, I was peppered with questions from people and I had to come up with answers. You were not put into that position. I got plenty of questions that uh uh that I come around to every year, right? When the people said, "Give us meat." So it says and then the they died while the meat was in their teeth. They died. Yeah. And Rashi says he brings two different arguments. Maybe the sadikim died immediately and the rashim suffered for 30 days. Or maybe the rashim died immediately and the sadikim lasted for 30 days. And I say, well, if the sadikim died and the rashim died, who was left? >> [gasps] >> So, who didn't die? [laughter] How many people died in in the misim? I can't find this anywhere. This has always bothered me. So, I mean, I got plenty of questions. It's just the basic questions that most people ask, you know, I had to work on when I was younger. But if you're not prepared, what does it say in Pikas? know what to answer when somebody challenges you. So in order to do that, you have to think about it. And I always say every from Jew has to have a notebook where they write down their questions and they keep track and then work to find the answers. So I could get stumped uh uh you know once but if I keep getting stumped on the same question I'm doing something wrong and I have to make an effort >> to be able to find answers to questions and not just to rely on like you know g I don't know I never thought about it you know well think about it now you know and um fascinating little chapter in World War II. There was so many things that went on World War II. It's such a complicated uh period of history. But the D-Day invasion took place in June 1944 and the Americans were slowly making more and more progress and the Germans were retreating. And came December, they decided that basically the Germans were defeated and it was just, you know, mopping up. And so the troops that were like resting, they put them like you know uh across from the ordain forest because you know who's going to come through with tanks and and things like this through the Ardans. Well, Hitler anticipated this and he decided for one last push and he made a big attack through the Ardens through uh this section. And it became known as the Battle of the Bulge because the lines bulged out where the you know the Germans were advancing and uh it was for the most part unexpected and the 101st Airborne Division were locked down in this little town and they were surrounded and they were just picking them off and there was no way they could fight it off. They were just trying to survive. They were running out. They were rationing ammunition. They were rationing food. They were down to one small meal a day. And they and and they were counting every bullet. And so the Germans came over and offered them to surrender rather than to stay here and be killed. And the answer they gave them was nuts. Guess that meant they weren't going to. But in the meantime, it doesn't matter how brave you are, you're going to get wiped out. You only have two days left. Yeah. of of stuff. So Eisenhower called in all of his generals and said, "Can anybody reach them before the two days are up?" And all the generals looked at each other because everyone knew it would take at least a week to get there. It was impossible. And the Nazis knew this, too. There was no way that they were going to get there in less than a week. There was they they were trapped. And General Patton says, "Yeah, I could be there in two days." And everybody looks at him and says, "That's impossible." And Eisenhower looked at him. Yeah. And he said, "George, you sure?" He says, "Yep." Says, "Go do it. Save them." And he got there in two days. Why? Because when everybody was convinced that the Germans were beaten, Patton wasn't. He thought they still had some fight in him. And so while everybody else was resting on their laurels, he had his staff draw up contingency plans for everything that might happen, including what happened if we had to rush the army over here in two days. How would we do it? And he had it all worked out. He had all the maps. He had all the plans. He had all the orders. Everything was set up. So he just had to tell his staff, "Go." And he came in and he was able to save them. and and the Germans were shocked that they were able to get there in that amount of time. But he considered the contingencies. He thought about it. So you're going in for Russashana. Now listen, I'm telling you the question up front so you know how to study. Yeah. Why should I give you another year of life? I would say even better than that. Do you want another year of life? You know there's so many people who don't appreciate life um mayor in his where it says um next to he wrote m to m why because if we didn't die and life just went on forever so people would think No, there's no point to it anymore. No point to it. If you know it's going to end, then it becomes much more meaningful. Knowing you have a, you know, short amount of time left. I used to ask this question to people when I was teaching. I would say, "What if you had one day left to live? What would you do?" And everyone's thinking what they would do. And one time someone said to me, "What would you do?" I said, "Just what I'm doing now. I live every day like it's my last. [laughter] I'm not waiting to find out. I said, but I will tell you the following. Most people if they know they have one day left to live are not going to take a nap. You know, so people who sleep away their life or they just sit and watch videos or they just, you know, waste their time, they turn around and suddenly their life is gone. It uh it reminded me very much of the uh of the little sponsorship we had Beno where they said this was a person who worked for the community. He supported his family. He managed to learn go to dominion do do mitzvah. He managed to understand that time is precious. When the fas and his brother were coming back from their father's levaya, he said, "No, at least he had a yamim." And his brother says, "What do you mean he died very young?" He says, "I didn't say shunim. I didn't say he had long years. I said he had aras yum, long days. He made every day count." And uh that's what we have to do now as we go into understand as we come to the end of the year before rash sh and we're going to go in and say okay this is ending this what you deposited in my account this past year is ending and I'm hoping for you to put in another deposit and let's decide what we're going to get for this next year and if we Do our will be able to say to why we should be kept alive. Life The greatest gift of all we should be. Now, [clears throat] uh, producer Ari always sends me appreciation comments because he knows that I I teeter on the edge of uh, depression all the time. Hi, Revolves. I just want to thank you for your wonderful and entertaining podcast. It always leaves me feeling uplifted and happy. Thank you. I'm a super busy colo wife and mother. [laughter] I don't know why it sounds like one of those ads from the 60s. I'm a busy wife and mother and I therefore look for ways to make myself more efficient. But I I I appreciate what that means because you know your husband's sitting there in Kylo. I'm sure he's staging a rice. I'm sure he's not smoozing with his friends or going out for a cup of coffee, you know, but uh you are working very hard and listening to a podcast while I get things done is my form of self-care. Hashem, I'm sure you will receive messages from many different demographics, but I'm not sure you've heard from any columies yet. No, I don't think so. We're definitely listening and enjoying it, but we're just too busy to comment. [laughter] You know what? Just knowing that people listen, you know, is is such a tremendous tremendous thing for me. What a co that people who are busy take out time to listen to me when uh when there are so many other podcasts out there and so many things to be able to do. People listen to me. between working, cooking, doing laundry, and taking care of our children. It's so important for the mother of the home to stay happy and calm. I always say this when I speak to a nay group because I think that to be makaz, you know, the the mothers of is so important. Um I even remember as a child being in a different room for my mother. Whenever I heard her singing or speaking cheerfully, my mood would instantly lift. I keep that memory in the forefront of my mind and I make an effort to do things that help me stay calm and happy. Even when money is tight, there are always little things we can do to lift our spirits and regain our sense of calm. My favorite is listening to your podcast, especially during the times of year when music isn't allowed. There you go. And and that's that's for free. The best things in life are free. Yep. Although we are in the three weeks, we lessen our sim, but never outwardly for our children and husbands. We must keep homes consistent and safe. And it's done by being warm. Please keep it up and continue. It doesn't say no. Says less. But of course, you have to have. You're right. One last thought. I would encourage you to stop repeating the nasty comments you receive. [laughter] It gives power to the people who don't deserve it and can darken everyone's mood. I know. But I had a fellow Abe came to my shar from South Africa and he had a lot of deep ideas that he used to share. One of them was I always feel like when you have a bad mood you should share IT WITH OTHERS. [laughter] THANK YOU for everything you do. A grateful mommy. Thank you, mommy. Next. Thank you for keeping me cheerful when it's otherwise difficult. I can't tell Rabiowski how much the brilliant Shiorim. Now, I don't know if if this person is from England or South Africa because when they say brilliant, it just means nice. You know, I used to go there to speak and they would say that was brilliant rabbi and I was like, well, yeah, I guess it was pretty good. You know, that's someone said, "No, brilliant." It doesn't mean that here. Just like when they say gorgeous. Gorgeous just means like, you know, pretty, you know. So, brilliant just means like, you know, good. But I'm hoping you're an American [laughter] and shows that have helped me over the years. But let's just say I don't think I'd be as successful as I am. I actually tried to come for a shabasuda. I think it would have made a pretty good guest [laughter] seeing as I had a bad too and I helped to clean up. Oh my gosh, you should always say that when you're calling up [laughter] always throw in and by the way like like Rabbi Alask brought up poorly to help clear off and and clean up a shabas. [laughter] But it never seemed to work out. And now that I'm married, I guess I've lost my chance. Why? We have married couples sometimes. Sure. when we have people look I got a I got a large extended family so if even like three or four of them come you know that's it my wife is uh sitting in the kitchen anyway and not for religious reasons um just one question where those mashar tapes that you've spoken about so often didn't producer m said that they were being uploaded to the site I guess can't thank you enough to cheerio from a fan from the UK. Oh no. So he just said brilliant like nice jolly good show. Hip hip and all that sort of rot. [laughter] Yes. Yes. Very good. Very good. And that's it. Until next time. You can go and check out my website if you want to find out more about this show or the Rabbi community. We are we are taking over the world. There are a lot of us eventually. We're we're going to be our own little cult, you know, and I went to so I I learned how to run a cult, you know. I had this this these girls from a particular seminary and there were a number of girls there, you know, who were like guy marries the daughter of aim guy and they have girl. So, you know, even though they don't have a girl school, but they were girls, you know. Anyway, so I had like three of these girls and and two of the girls were there and they go, "I don't know. I just feel like is a cult." And they go, "Oh, yeah, sure it is. [laughter] Yeah, of course." You know, they only marry among each other. You know, next generation you'll know who's like, you know, because they'll have like six fingers on their hands, you know, right [laughter] from all the inbreeding. But anyway, so uh you want to find out more about our community, go to website, you can post a question, you can make a comment. Uh you can uh uh download uh other shorimm and articles. You can listen to the theme song, download the theme song. Uh you can uh uh sponsor an episode. We need sponsors, my friends. Sponsor Paran five, sponsor question and answer. Um, uh, you can buy me a coffee, you know. You can buy me a car. [laughter] I came back from America. My front door lock was broken. My air conditioner wasn't working. My refrigerator, the compressor died. The burner in my oven broke. Um the the air conditioner in my room is leaking, you know, and um and the mouse in my computer broke. [laughter] I don't know what happened. Everything's falling apart. So, uh you know, anyone who wants to uh uh replace anything else, feel free. [laughter] Hey, listen. I got a bookcase this way. So, uh you know, in any event, that's it. Uh until uh next time uh and we hope to see you some more and [music] have a wonderful. I am David Olowski and this has been the Rabbi Olowski show. [applause] It's the Rabbi Orlowski show. Torah and Sima ready to go. The Rabbi Olowski show. Knowledge and wisdom will help you grow. Lots of fun in every episode. And we don't have to rhyme though. It's the Rabbi Orlovski show on Rabbi Orlavski.com to any YouTube [music] and more. It's the Rabbi Orski show and ready to go. It's the Rabbi Orski show. Till next time till we meet again. The Rabbi orski show. It's the Rabbi Orlowski show. It's the Rabbi Orlowski show.