Erev Yom Kippur ‘23 - [Archives]

Yes, we do a mission. Certain missions I have to tell you I did and it's relevant. Even when it's not relevant, I can say something as weird as this. I'm going to go to stroll, you say send regards to Rebbe Esterg. When I come back, there's a derech eretz to call you and say David, I sent regards. I have seen sophisticated people do it even though it's not relevant to you if I sent regards or not. It doesn't It's not like you'll change anything you do, but it's a derech eretz to be choyizish shlichus tzel umshaleach. To go back to the one who sent you and say asisi shlichusich, I did your message. Says the Sfas Emes kchuli macham dvarim. Thank you so much for giving. Kchuli macham dvarim l'Hashem means bring words means get focused on your shlichus. The dvarim you're bringing t'Hashem is actually your unique byidaber Hashem el Moshe l'eimor. The deeper that he spoke to you, the job that he sent you on, bring it back t'Hashem. And it means to recommit to our shlichus, to recommit to our task that we have. We all have unique tasks. My sha I was reading I was reading last night about the Ribnitzer Rebbe. It I felt like I felt like um I felt like I I had heard a lot of things about him and I wanted to cyrus before Yom Kippur and I was reading about the Ribnitzer Rebbe. A few things struck me. One of the thing that struck me a lot, he was in Russia doing bris milah. And it was at a time when it was incredibly dangerous to do bris milah. They were fighting three things like hard. The Russian government was trying to eliminate religion and they were actively battling religion and they did not want myalin. They were like They were like That was like a mission of theirs to stop mylim, shoychtim, and teachers of Torah. Those were the three things they were like looking to to really eradicate. And he besides teaching Torah, and I believe he did shrita as well, but his mitzvah that was like his mitzvah he was a myl. He did hundreds and hundreds of bris milah, hundreds. To do one was life threatening. You were risking your life, you were risking dying. He did hundreds of bris milah in Russia and was going around doing bris milah at a time it was life threatening to do milah. And many times he came this close to getting in trouble. In trouble means either death or Siberia. Either a quick form of death or a slow form of death. And he went around, he was doing bris milah. The sense of mission, the sense this was a man possessed, he was on a mission to do something. And traveling around Russia doing bris milah at the risk of his life, but the sense of the servant in the army of Hashem. He was a man possessed with a mission that moved me a lot. I think about my I have seen people my shoe function. There are people who are always tired, who never have energy. They just always tired. Finding yourself very tired often just means you don't have a mission. Certain things energize us. You get strength and you you can speak to Akiva Balsam runs and he does takes on projects and it gives energy. When you have a project, Akiva, you know when people say I'm just always tired, they call it mano and give names to it. It often just means you don't feel like you have a mission. And [snorts] person feels weak and tired and drained. They're not possessed. You see great people, they always look like they have endless energy. The Ribnitzer Rebbe barely slept. He literally barely slept. It describes his schedule, especially all the years of his life, but the man was on a mission. He ran around. The sense of mission and purpose was like very, very strong in his life. And and that like that struck me. The mission specifically of doing bris milah. Now, it's very dramatic and in some ways we all we think to ourself and if makes me think, "Moishe, if I had such a dramatic mission, I'd also be on fire." But the answer is that we all have our missions. We all have real, real missions. I think I think we can reframe a lot of the challenges of our life are actually missions. I spoke shall I share this that, you know, when I was a youngster there was a movie Mission Impossible. And I don't know if I ever saw the movie in my life. I was not a movie watcher, baruch Hashem, but it was very much spoken about because the producer or somebody involved in the movie became a frum yid. And it seemed like on that movie the the the heroes would get like a tape. A tape of their mission, then the tape would implode. And it would like but it would tell them their mission. Hashem gives us all tremendous missions to do. And I think often reframing a lot of us call things in our life challenges when I think we can reframe as missions. We're actually each of us in our own families, in our own families. Could I if I could share I have seen I have seen many people in my life. It's cool as you getting older. I'm not going to give like specific examples. I can I can I I as you get older, you just get to see more. I'm still very young, but you see more. You see two generations. You see you see how things play out more. You just if any observer of life, you see more and notice more. It's funny, you know, when you play Jewish geography, some youngsters get upset at you. I don't know if you have how exciting I had for Shabbos. A friend who was like this with me. We will I love him. And I had his son by my house for Shabbos. I don't know if you have like what that feels like what that means. It was very beautiful. Now, I feel when I was younger that I didn't share myself. You guys have changed me or changing me. And I feel I was very close friends. I had such a go go in for my friend. I want to sit down with him and share myself. I want to talk and reintroduce each ourselves to each other. But all of a sudden, I'm interested if you could picture Johnny one day Morty sandwich his kid eating eating a suda by you. It's delightful. Old friends and the world you just see years and this your friends kid, your cousin's kid. Things get that's just Jewish geography. You know you're getting old when Jewish geography is delightful. The kids >> [laughter] >> The kids here at Var M'Aise are Five alert. Five alert. Yeah. The cut the The The kids here at Var M'Aise is one of the observations I had. I have seen people who had big missions to impact the world. And they might have wanted to be a machanech or a certain type of machanech, a certain type of rebbe. And that wasn't what Hashem had in their in mind for them. But I watched them as heads of families. The impact as the head of a family, you're impacting billions of people in the world. Billions. The impact as head of a family, as a father of a family, the impact on your children, all the people your children meet, and all those people your children meet who they meet, you're impacting the world. I always talk to the dorm counselors and I I said this on Shabbos that when you take four guys to kosher world, you've changed the Yeshiva. Because those four guys walk into the dorm and are happier. I not it's not a joke, you changed all Yeshiva. This Shabbos was one of the great Shabboses in the history of the Yeshiva. You know why? Because Matisyahu had an incredible Shabbos. It should we just changed the Yeshiva. Very silly people look at numbers. I don't know how many were there. First of all, Matisyahu is a world for himself. If you matzel nefesh achas, you saved an oilam maleh. An oilam maleh, what does it mean? A full world? Means not just 8 billion people who live on the earth now, it's whoever ever lived on the earth. Put together all the billions whoever lived on the earth. If you save one person, one person is infinitely valuable. And by the way, you impacted the rest of the world. A person's changed cuz he impacts him who impacts him who impacts him. But you can think about it. You've changed the world when one person stays in Yeshiva. It's possible this Shabbos the Yeshiva changed. Matisyahu had an incredible Shabbos. The Yeshiva just gets all different. I have told parents who've complained, "My son's not coming." Don't worry, his roommate came. He'll be good. They go He goes back He goes back to the room and you just say, "Good Shabbos." He just plays hacky with another guy. That guy is changed. And each each person is is valuable. I've had I've I've seen people who wanted to be big stellers and this type of job and it's all cool. And we come from Avraham Avinu, we have big goals of idealism. We all want to give bris them to all the kids in Russia. I relate to who wouldn't want to go around Russia. By the way, give a bris to your Give a bris to your own children. And by the way, be a father and be a be be a brother to you You have a brother, you have a sister, you have family members. We all have missions that sit right in front of us. I am not saying as opposed to dreaming of doing more and certainly the Ribnitzer was tremendous madregas. Hashem gave him his mission. He was not zoche, he did not have children, the Ribnitzer Rebbe. And he was zoche that he had many children he impacted. I'm not coming to then what our mission is, but don't miss the mission that's right in front of us. And see it. I'd say often a difficult family situation when it's not framed properly is like this the tsiyon I have, this challenge, this difficulty. When you reframe it, it's actually your soul was put here with the mission. You have an opportunity of doing heroic things, powerful, important, precious, cool things, bringing out tremendous godliness. We've seen I've seen guys in yeshiva change entire dynamic of their family. In healthy ways, not not like changing mom like giving her mussar, no. By just shining your light I have seen entire families change, which of course that changes communities, that changes worlds and countries. But we all have our place of impact. Our place of impact and instead of seeing everything, instead of seeing everything as nisyonos, as difficulties, as just woah all these difficulties in my life. I wonder how many things we pray for, "Hashem save me from this, heal me from this." Are actually opportunity of tremendous kiddush Hashem. And I'm not saying not to dive in for it to get better. I am saying to also accept the mission and to function in that way, that I have a mission and a purpose and a place and a standing and something that I can bring very, very beautifully in my life. Of course I have to think how it can look like, where I can be, what I could be in this situation, what it looks like me flourishing in this situation. Right? Guys were said from this that means take your and bring them back to them. Means figure out your mission and start being more in touch with your mission. And that's the task that we all have. And I think this is a much deeper type task. I think we'll talk like beating ourselves. I can't believe I did this. I can't believe I did that. A lot of what causes us to sin is we didn't have the energy of a person on a mission. When I was reading about the I think a big part of his is the person was on fire as an Hashem. He was such a loyalist and so like taken by a mission that's fire. I would actually I would actually assume that's for many many a lot of them. When I when I left Miller's Miller's moved me a lot. Here was a person who was an Hashem who was doing something, teaching the generation something. When I left his street that normally was in a street. I remember leaving his there was no such thing as Hashem. It wasn't like that. I felt like a person on a mission and it was like the of the was barely a year. And I think the more we function as people on missions, a sense of mission, a sense of purpose, and it has to do with situations of our own life. All of our situations and difficult situations that I don't say are easy. We love saying on things in in lives that it's an assayin, it's a challenge. We don't What What I think we have to do better is not just say it's a challenge or this is so difficult having this, having that. We have to ask, what does it look like me flourishing and relating to this difficult situation? There's something I could be in this situation. The Ribnitzer didn't just say in Russia, "What an assayin, they want to kill it." He felt and saw a task that belonged to him and and was willing to give up his life for the task. It's obvious to me I don't know how he came to this. He felt he was the mile in Russia. And the mile has to give bris milahs. I'll die for it. I hear. But the mile has to be a mile. You could even ask, you could clear the halacha, you're allowed to give up your life. The answer is bishas hashmad, you give up your life for a minag. And he saw himself as the mile of Russia. One of the most interesting things in the book. And I can't I can't This exchange was like magic to me. I can't promise this is true. I just don't know. I'm reading a book. I can't like it or you I want to be very careful. I Do I believe Nobody's trying to lie. Sometimes in a book, remember this is functioning in middle of Russia. So, it's hard to like verify and he was a very mysterious person. Who It's hard to say who knew him very, very well. And even knowing him, what that meant. He was a very, very dehaiben, elevated person who was very separate from people. So, I don't know I can't promise the story happened as a conversation. He was very, very good friends with the Skolener Rebbe. They were very close. That's a fact that the Skolener and the Ribnitzer were very close. Reportedly, the Skolener gave him some mussar. He impacted Russian Jewry. He gave bris milahs and he elevated Russian Jewry a lot. Great to see it sleep. And reportedly, the Reb the Skolener Rebbe gave him mussar that he didn't give more mussar to Russian Jewry. Russian Yidden loved the Ribnitzer. They loved him, and he gave tremendous love. And reportedly, the Skolener gave him mussar, gave his friend, they were good friends, mussar that you didn't give more mussar to Russian Jews. Why didn't you rebuke them more? Now, he listened to it. He didn't reply. He took the mussar. Later on, he told people close to him that he felt his word in Shamayim was powerful. And if he rebuked, it would be a kitchrig on Russian Yidden. And it was beshit that he didn't rebuke a lot. He felt it wasn't so pashet for him. It was fascinating to me with how he saw his role, how he lived his role. That was known the Ribnitzer. Any Yid came from Russia, the Ribnitzer would give tremendous time, hours, and attention. He felt that as a mission. He had come from Russia, and he had seen that as a tremendous mission in his life. I say to us all all of us, a lot of the difficult situations we find ourselves in, all the difficult, not a lot, the difficult situations and the challenges of our life are missions for us. And to try to visualize in healthy ways how we can be a big light in the situation with we're in. Each of us with whatever difficulty that we're con- tending to try to picture how I could be a person of a how I could shine in my situation. People could be on fire like that. You watch people who are on a mission, who are doing something and about something, they have an energy. They're crazy. They don't get tired, by the way. They all of a sudden they like flourish like in a certain way. We've watched over the years, I've watched dorm counselors live like supernatural lives. I've watched it for years. Guys who like I have a mission, I have a purpose, I have a plan. Now, it doesn't need to be giving brisk meal to the in the Russia. Doesn't need to be a dorm counselor in the Yeshiva. A guy in his own place, if he gets his situation and he has a visual, it's not lecturing people and he has he has to be patient. But if if he could see [clears throat] in his situation a light that he can bring and an energy he can bring to his family, to his siblings, to his community and he could visualize that and then go out and be patient in building it and being what you can be, a guy would function with a certain energy, a certain strength, a certain passion. He wouldn't be so passive. He'd be much He would gain tremendous tremendous energies and strength. And that's all of us to try in our lives to sense, to see, to appreciate. That's that's that's that's what I'd like to suggest the first thing. >> [snorts] >> I spoke by Shala Shudas about the minute he's thrilled that we take out the the tie, the minute we keep in Yeshiva before a chosson gets married and he's focused on the tie that is marriage. It's cool [snorts] Kol Nidre. So, if you read if you read about it by the Marranos, they made promises. They made shvuos and nedarim to the church and they said Kol Nidre, they annulled all other vows and they said my only promise is to you Hashem. My only loyalty, the only place that I have a person is Mushba v'Omed Mer Sinai. All of our souls swore to Hashem. So, Kol Nidre they annulled other vows. Now, if you're a Yid who's very who thinks things are historical only in the past, Yiddishkeit's always present. May the Hava Hava what was was. We're not a relic of the past. We're very much present. Why do we say Kol Nidre today? Did anybody here swear to the church anything? And I think Kol Nidre is so powerful tonight, what we're going to say is many we we all we all have all these other allegiances, all these other things that we forget our iker tafkidim, our iker purposes and missions. We all make promises and we all make and Kol Nidre says I'm going to focus I'm not here all my other allegiances and I'm focused on this mission of being a sincere loyal servant of Hashem. When I look at any single guy, any single person, the man I've watched this over the years, there are guys sitting right here who changed their whole families in powerful ways by their own accepting of a mission of growth, of a mission of sincerity and healthy, happy, comfortable ways. They've changed their entire families. They've changed but them that's that's you change the world like that. You literally change your whole world which of course has ramifications. I think a big part and I ask every all of us, I want to do this on Yom Kippur. I want to take time, stop keeping up, catching up, making sure I want to pause, relax, very not not in not tense, seriously and sincerely on the day of lifnei Hashem, I want to try to think about the stations you gave me Hashem and how I can be more powerful and more present, more impactful, more energetic in the missions you gave me. Do you hear the words? I want to spend time. Rebbe Akiva smartly gathered a group. I think some of this work has to be independent. I think a group can meet and share. You have to be careful not everything do you want to say and a lot of the missions are really have to do with specific family situations. And it's not what you could do for your brother, who amongst us doesn't have a brother that you want to impact, a sister. The impact when it's family members is not I'm going to lecture him or this year. I'm going to tell her no, no, no. No, no. I'm going to be something. And and again, then we have to picture how we could What's that person? What's that flourishing version of me? How does that look? There'll be setbacks, there'll be difficult and to be that picture of what I can be. How many homes I have seen in Yeshiva? There are You know how many homes and I'm going to give extreme examples. You know how many guys in Yeshiva come from single family homes? Do you know what a Shabbos sukkah looks like when when there's no father to make kiddush? And do you know how many guys in Yeshiva over the years have gone on fire? And I'm not talking about the Now the Shabbos table is full of divrei Torah. Now the Shabbos table has smiles. Actually it's warm. Should people like each other? You know how many Shabbos tables in the Yeshiva have changed completely and there's like love at the table. There's actually like good jokes at the table. There's actually warmth. And Shabbos, the day we experience Hashem's love, the day that we're shiyach to tap in to tidlei this l'Hashem. Do you know how many people have changed the equation? Now again, it's a process. But you know how much energy if you can picture the best version of you at your Shabbos table. And by the way, you There may be two parents at the Shabbos table and a father who's stressed out of his brains cuz he's not making parnassa. A mother who's stressed because her husband is stressed and they're not relating very well. What does it look like by a son who's actually like flourishing and actually like doing well and happy and brings love to the table and and a beautiful person who is giving love to dad and and and that picture of what I can be and being that version and how much impact that has in the world Hashem gave me. Things are not by accident. Our situations were set up by Hashem and Hashem put a messenger there, you and me. And who we macham dvarim says the possibility bring back your shlichus to Hashem. Come with words. What words? The words to Hashem as he sees shlichus. See, I did my shlichus. I don't know if tonight and tomorrow we could say I did my shlichus. I believe the words we could bring to Hashem is I'm starting to understand my shlichus. I actually understand what I could be and what I could do and I'm starting to formulate a plan of how it could look. >> [snorts] >> Now, I get it's delicate and every situation is so unique. I'm talking about family situations, they're any number. We can look in this room and go person by person. We all have our unique conditions and granted they're complex. They're delicate, they're sensitive. I couldn't possibly speak about it and by the way, even in a group meeting, I could picture Akiva as a group on Yom Kippur that I like a lot. They talk about their goals. I could picture being very, very complex because some of the most important places are so subtle and a guy might not want to share what his sister, his mother, his brother, how it looks. But I could picture a guy telling Akiva that I want to be like a fire in my home. And I but you have to picture how that could be. It's not so easy to have that fire. There things that put out the fire, what it could look like, what would have to happen out of the home, how it would express itself. Again, they're all different. Each of us have unique situations, but we have a unique light that we can bring and be and shine that's powerful, that's really, really powerful. I have seen years when I was reading about the Ribnitzer Rebbe being the mayor of in in in Russia, I have seen guys here be like, I watch Rosh Hashanah. I'm going to say this, it's on a tape. There's a guy who's sitting here. I watched him with his brother Rosh Hashanah. I was like very moved. It was an important part of my Rosh Hashanah. Seeing a guy with his brother in Yeshiva brought his brother to Yeshiva. Just watch the love, the friendship, the camaraderie. We all have so These are not by accident the situations of our life. We were sent on a shlichus. Hear the words of Hashem, the words of Hashem saying, "I have a mission for you. I have a purpose." [clears throat] Again, I don't want to say to each of us what our mission. I think there are a lot of things that we just open our eyes, it's like so blatant there was a mission for us. It's obvious. It's like obvious missions. Now, I'm going to say truthfully as we go through our lives, we find places and things, we'll find things in our community that's needed. You'll find things in the Yeshiva that are needed. They're obvious things people need if they're just present to situations and then take it on. Then take it on and do it and and grab it and be it. You'll get so much strength. Reb Nosson Tzvi Finkel said, he said a line, "Achrayus gibt koach." Responsibility gives power. I have seen people just become so much more energetic. The opposite of sleepy and tired and bored and I have seen people become a fire cuz they want to be something. They want to be something and they all of a sudden, like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, what happened to him? He's fire. He's like trying to be something. He sees a mission. He sees a place. I wish I could say names. There are names here I I'd love to tell the story. I don't want to tell the story. I don't want to for the very reason it's hard for guys to speak this out with each other times. I don't want to tell everybody's story. There are guys here that I've seen change their entire families. The energy and the guy knows it and sees it. The energy that gives somebody of being that son. It also is difficult by the way and could be frustrating cuz you might have a picture of your energy how it could play out. This has to be smart and I promise it's not about lecturing. It's about being a light. It's about being sincere. It's about tapping into authentic places in self, the love that we have in us, the the the the the Yeah, and then of course resolving our own things and to be what we need to be. There's a lot of work that would take place. But I wonder that on Yom Kippur a day we're doing chuva we're so busy. I messed up. I speak this. I do this. Bro, bro, we're busy with that in terms of our mission allows us to cure more. If I could give a If I can give a mashal to the guys, I'm very I'm typically not a big fan of going to therapy too young. I don't like youngsters. I don't let guys in the Yeshiva go to therapy too early. I think it's it it creates later on when a guy could actually succeed with therapy. The word therapy to me, I don't I'm not talking about therapists. Therapy to means means resolving, working yourself out, bringing the best versions so you could shine your light into the world, your soul on the world. That's And every person should should work on it and we work in it all the days of our life, but as to do it more intensely the older we get, the more we see of ourself, the more things are brought out, the the we run into things. I have told many guys continue on in life and as you bump into things, blockages and things that go wrong, it's exposing parts of you that you could then work on. So, of course, in terms of all of us, when we start seeing our mission, what a great version of our self could look like in all different situations, we'll also bump into blockages. Why isn't it working the like like I visualized? And we'll discover things within ourselves that we want to perfect and make better and work out. But that's how I believe we even get to our hatam. Often the the mistakes we make come from not knowing what our mission is and then even within the context of our mission, it highlights where I have to fix that cuz something's getting in the way of me being what I want to be and that that causes a lot of a lot of working out all different things, but I wanted to share this with the with the island this this idea. I think it becomes a job in the next 24 hours on a day that we're asked that we're doing children and we're returning to our father who loves us, who wants us, who wants us and wants a close relationship, thinking about opportunities in our life to be connected to Hashem, to be godly, to be a person who is expresses the godliness that's inside of all of us. I think would become an important part of our next 24 hours. I would advise anybody anybody all of us I would advise to spend some time over the next 24 hours in your own life like making a hashbon of where I could be a light, where I could shine, how I can shine, what it looks like. The places to start are a lot of the things you see as the deepest challenge. Oh my goodness, this one's so hard, that one's so hard, my neighbor's impossible. Hello, you might have a mission, you might be bumping on a mission, and you might find that a lot of things you were praying to get rid of, to change, are actually the place where you have an opportunity to shine and elevate it. How many people we've just seen many, many friends change the equation. But again, that that's that's something that I would very, very much advise for each person to spend time thinking. It's a very interesting things Yom Kippur were together with the tsibur, were together with the tsibur, and it matters our place as part of the tsibur. So, on the one hand, there's tfila with tsibur and we're saying Hashem is together, but it's also very, very private time Yom Kippur. Yom Kippur when a person is working out and resolving and figuring out is very, very private. Like figuring out in some ways part of Yom Kippur, I'd love to just be alone somewhere. I'd love to have like a 25-hour retreat of solitude somewhere. The reality is that we're part of a nation, we're part of Hashem's people, and we do it in context of being part of a yeshiva, and that's important. We're part of the Am Hashem. We're doing some private work over Yom Kippur. It's lifnei Hashem. We can connect Hashem, we could feel His presence, we could sense ourselves. It's a school of chaim that we could sense our self, our own connection to Hashem, lifnei Hashem to Torah, our own place of importance, our own place where we could bring out tremendous godliness that's inside of us all. So, these are That would be a Yom Kippur thought that I think would be very, very powerful. One of the One of the ways to be mezakeh and din One of the ways that's spoken about to have success in a din, in judgment, is to be a rav in tzirchum type of person. Is to be somebody who people need. Now, it sounds like a trick, so do things for the rabbin. It's not a trick at all. All of us were sent here to make a big difference in the big picture. And the rabbin like people love thinking about plans they do for the masses. The rabbin like is usually your sister. You had a place and by the way, you affect your sister. You just affected her whole class. She's happier. She Whoever in each of our own lives like never like ready. Each soul was put down to have meaning and purpose and energy and and lift up the next person. So, you think all of us thinking about these things is tremendous husband, but it's not a trick. Like yeah, Hashem's judging me. Oh-oh, I better It's not a trick. It's actually living with the mission that Hashem gave me. So, that was the first the first message I want to have. There's a line we say in the davening that we are judged my say issue of God I say the actions of a person of God I say and his mission. I don't think it's like two things. We're judged on our action and also our mission. I think often our actions come from how much we're in touch with our mission and how much we're very out of touch with our mission. When when you read the story of this great person, he was in touch with his mission. He was living his mission. He was plugged into a mission. I think all of us can be more plugged in in our own mission in our places in our family, the places in our Yeshiva, the places in our community. I watched the guys in Yeshiva who really like care about the Yeshiva and watch them like embrace like engaged that they see they sense they have a mission and a place and the energy it gives them, the passion it gives. You you people functioning with tremendous energy, that affects my sish gufa by being in touch with pkudasai, with his pkida, his mission, affects my sish. So, that was the that was the first the first message that I wanted to share with the guys. One of the Rambam brings people The Rambam brings a list of people who are who who don't have chuva. And one of the one of the one of the one of the one of the people that the Rambam brings is chos v'shalom somebody who's malig al hamitzvos. Somebody who laughs at mitzvos. Let me see if I could find it. >> [snorts] >> Ah, baruch Hashem. In perek V in the fourth perek of the Rambam, I underlined it, baruch Hashem. The Rambam says five things stop chuva. The noyel in darkei chuva he says, chamisha dvarim that block paths of chuva. And one of his five his third things he says a malig al hamitzvos. Somebody who laughs at mitzvos, doesn't respect mitzvos. Since they're cheap in his eyes, he doesn't run after them, and he doesn't do them. If you don't do mitzvos b'mai yeshka. So, a a a negative path that blocks passageways of chuva is somebody who mocks mitzvos. And the opposite is showing respect for mitzvos. One of the most beautiful scenes in the yeshiva is watching guys come in this space mash throughout the day and put on their tfillin. It's a beautiful scene. If ma If malig if laughing at mitzvos are noyel block passageways of chuva, so that in aids to enter into chuva is to show respect. Is to be mitzvahs. Is to show respect for mitzvahs. I spoke on Shabbos afternoon that what unleashes power in us is when somebody respects us. When we are respected it unleashes in us. When we respect the mitzvah says Morty, "Yeah, mitzvah who you shall if you reveal a mitzvah the mitzvah impacts you equally to performing mitzvahs is to respect mitzvahs. Is to respect. Is not to spit at me to treat mitzvahs with the dignity and the respect that mitzvahs that mitzvahs deserve. Respecting and appreciating mitzvahs are huge. It's beautiful that right after right after Yom Kippur will be to a beautiful succos that was that that two precious mitzvahs that I want to speak about for a few minutes. We have a mitzvah of eating in the succah of succos. Yeshivas I shouldn't say eating Yeshivas succah. Dwelling in the succah and we have a mitzvah of minim. And one of the great paths of chuva is greater respect and appreciation of mitzvahs. I have a minute for many years. I hope I get to do it this year going with my sons together and we go to buy the minim. It's one of the great experiences we've done over the years. We go together to buy the minim. I'm very very into my children picking out their own minim and I would suggest here all of us have you're at ages where your father can buy you when you come home and you have it bought for you. I would very much suggest if you can pay yourself better I'll be honest I pay for my kids. I'm not I'm not it's not fire that they pay themselves. If somebody worked better you pay yourself much better. Just better I'm the last guy. I'm not into parents telling but parents buy your kids clothing. Parents say, "I'm teaching responsibility." Just love your kids. Buy them clothing. Buy them stuff. That's the best thing you can do for your kids. I think if somebody here works and could pay, that Rizal was hifligmoidiza. He spoke a lot. I can get a free dollar minimum. I could get I have somebody offers me yearly I would I would never If they got me free, I'd still buy one. That Rizal was very, very into this. Hifligmoidiza. He speaks about it a lot, paying for a mitzvah. I want I respect the mitzvah. I want to pay money for it. I don't want it for free. I want to buy it. I want to pay for it out of reverence the mitzvah. I don't want it to be easy come. I want to pay for it. I would advise guided guys to go to the store and look for an esrog and then find out if it's kosher. You might want to bring it to a rub. This is like the oldest thing. Last night I was not feeling well Shabbos. And I was in and I was I I was lying down and I was in bed. And three beautiful yidden came to my house to show me their esrog. So, my son came, knocked on the door. So, my friend, I'm not feeling well. I said, "You know, maybe tell them we'll see tomorrow." And I said the three yidden left in the world who are coming to a rub to show an esrog. Feel like maybe tomorrow you This is like anything you ever wanted. I got I I promise you the energy I got, I'm still going on that energy. I got tremendous energy. I got energy that three guys came to show their doubts so beautiful. It energized me. It gave me tremendous koach. My son he afterwards I was reading about the rub he said, "You weren't feeling well." I said, "I got strength." He was like apologizing I shouldn't have knocked on the door. I promise you it energized me. Three yidden had a shilo about a straight and then we got into a whole shilo. One of my sons was thinking about a Yemenite esrog. I think I woke up and we and but I called and we handled that. And to me I go to the esrog when you when you after Yom Kippur bring yourself to a store. If you have your own money, spend with your own money. If your parents give you, fine also. That's fine also. You might not have. And pick out an esrog, buy one, find out if it's kosher. Ask somebody, speak to somebody, show it to somebody. Find out what you're looking for. You buy an esrog, buy a lulav, buy a ravis, buy a dasim. Chavivus a mitzvah and then all the days of Yom Tov, Shabbos we're not going to shake. You know why? Because I'm because the told us not to and God said to listen to them. So the first day of Sukkos we're not going to shake the dalet minim this year. Then Sunday, the second day of Sukkos you're going to have a precious mitzvah. Shake your lulav and esrog every day, make a bracha. The halacha is like this. The reason I've seen many guys mess this up. I want guys to do it right. It's a mitzvah that's precious. There's a big problem with dalet minim. The problem is like this. When do you make a bracha on a mitzvah? When do you make a bracha on a mitzvah? Before you perform it. It's called it's a gemara in Sukkah elsewhere it says "Kol hamitzvos kulan the blessing all the mitzvahs all of them you're supposed to make a blessing on a mitzvah before you perform the mitzvah." You know what the problem is? So let's say on tefillin before you tie the knot, Noah, you say and then you tie. So you do it before you perform the mitzvah. My should not the problem with all of minim is the problem is the second you pick it up you're yaitzer ready. So, how do you make a bracha before you perform the mitzvah? So, all of my maybe you should make the bracha when it's down. The problem is that it's way mister claw the bracha should always be made on an item that's in your hands. There's something called over the over when you make it too early it's a false start. False start, 5-yard penalty, redo first down. It's too early. Can we do it? What did you say? No, you can't. It's over the over. It's too early. Why? How does that apply here? As soon as you grab it Such a beat. So, here you're stuck. If it's not in your hand, it's not mister guys who says to make a bracha on a mitzvah that's not even in your hand. And the second it's in your hand you're yaitzer. Shucks. The all of minim has a problem. If it's not in my hands, how can I make a bracha the mitzvah is not near me. If it's in my hand I'm yaitzer. Nope. So, the answer what we do some what you do by the team last you dying is we wash first then we make a bracha. We don't want to make a bracha while our hands are tummy. So, we wash first of drying your hairs your hands is part of the mitzvah. I have seen guys talk while their hands are wet. They have to wash again. You have to wash again. You're not yaitzer the team last you dying. It's ironic. After you dry it people are crazy careful not to talk. They are bad miss if you talk you don't wash again. When your hands are wet and you talk you got to wash again. Do not talk till you dry your hands. Yeah, people are talking while they're washing. Wash again then. You're not allowed to talk while you're washing till it's dry. So, we wash, then we make the bracha, then we dry. After it's dry, it's better not to talk, but if you talk, you don't wash again. While it's wet, if you talk, wash again. The bottom line is is that every bracha you make before you perform the mitzvah on the dalet minim, we're stuck. If it's down, it's weird to make a bracha, it's not in your hand. It's in your hand, you're yotzei. What some do, Taisis Taf Lamed Tes Sukas Eises Kasher. Some Ashkenazic Jews do is they pick up the esrog upside down. Now, I have seen funny people though I don't they don't know anything about the mitzvah. So, they pick up the esrog right side up and turn it upside down. You're wasting your time. Why are you turning it upside down? You were yotzei already. The word is you're not yotzei dalet minim, you're only yotzei derech gedilasun, the way they grow. The way they grow, you're only yotzei dalet minim if you hold it derech gedilasun, the way they grow. An esrog grows, the pitom is on is down here, and it goes up the you know, it's it's stand the pitom up here. It's standing up. Even though on some, if you see a picture of an esrog tree, they fall they topple over, they're heavy. But, the way they are derech gedilasun is like this. So, you're only yotzei if you hold the esrog straight up. So, some Ashkenazic Jews pick up the lulav straight up, but the esrog they pick up backwards. If you're of that type, pick it up backwards. Don't pick it up right and turn it over, you've done nothing if you do that. Pick it up backwards, the point is gently pick it up and pick it up backwards. This way, you're not yotzei, but it's in your hand, make the bracha, and then turn it right side up and shake. So, you pick up backwards. Now, Sefardim a lot of Sefardim do not like that cabalistically, it's very bad to hold the dalet minim backwards. So, a lot of Sefardic din would never do that. Al pi kabbalah, that's not so ice kept to her to hold it upside down is like very not simple. So, there many many Yidden who do not do that trick. They will not pick up the esrog upside down. So, what do they do? Some people have in mind not to be ice so. They pick it up having in mind I'm not don't want to be ice so. Make the bracha. Now I'm ready to be ice so and they do the na'anu'im. They do the the na'anu'im. It's very very important to do the na'anu'im right. The na'anu'im are very much part of the mitzvah, the na'anu'im. And learn how to do the na'anu'im. The basic that differentiates us to what directions, understand the basic thing that Ashkenazic Yidden do is we do three times away, one back, away, back, away, back, three times. Now, while it's while you're doing it away, there's something called kishkush. So, you're doing it here and back and while you're doing it, you're shaking the top. Please, it's called kishkush. So, shake the top one, pull it back. Shake the top two, pull it back. Three and pull it back. The order of the directions are different minhagim to what the order what the order is. No, no, no. There's some shake. The lulav's doing a little dance. It's called kishkush. It's called kishkush. Yes, the answer is yes. Yeah, it doesn't it's not Some people purposely get one that's quite open at the top. You have to also make sure you're not posseling your lulav. But there's there's a kishkush. So, you're pushing it Morty, one back, one back, one back. And while you're doing it, you're shaking the tops. My son, Manny, might be the best in the world with the way he does it might be one of the best in the world. What I'm saying to everybody is is in the mitzvah of the dalet minim, in the mitzvah of the dalet minim, we're zocheh that one of the pathways of chuva is to take mitzvah seriously. I think we have the opportunity of going out and buying a dalet minim, finding out if it's kosher, or asking somebody who knows, showing it. Now, if somebody bought it for us, it's still wonderful. Take your dalet minim and ask somebody, is this kosher? Maybe even they can explain to you. The best is that we buy ourselves, even if somebody buys to take it seriously. I want to continue on. There's much I want to say, but I don't want to forget that behind me is a friend of mine whose name is Alan. And >> [applause] >> Alan! I want to say to the guys >> [cheering] >> I want to ask every guy here in a sincere way. These are a time of a lot of prayer, and I ask the guys, Alan is a friend of mine, to pray for Alan. He's somebody who has served the yeshiva extremely loyally. He loves the yeshiva and has given many, many years of his life to be loyal to help out the yeshiva, and it's something I take seriously. And I want to say that I'm thankful he's doing better. Alan's in the middle of treatments, and he needs a healing or a refuah shleimah. And I say somebody who cares about the yeshiva very, very sincerely and deeply. We made promises to each other that we would keep the I came, Alan was here from the start. I merited to be involved in this high school 15 years. He's been here from minute one. And I want to wish him many, many more years of working in the high school, working for the high school, being part of things here. I want to thank him for all that he's done, all the all the years of doing, but not just what he's done, the attitude, a very very good attitude. He likes the Yeshiva. He wants the Yeshiva. Yeah, it's true. You know, I helped out many kids kids would come to me, ask me for advice. And there's one one one right there. He sit right there. He can tell you what's going on. You know what I'm saying? You know. I helped out. Kids come and I give them advice. They can take it. They can do what they want with it. You know what I'm saying? That's all I can do. That's all I say. Appreciate it. Thank you. >> Thank you, ALLEN. THANK YOU. >> [applause] >> WE I CAN SIT HERE FOR LIKE 20 MINUTES ALL DAY. I DIDN'T KNOW THAT, ALLEN. You were sitting so quietly. I didn't Yeah, I know. Because you know, just like just like when we you were sitting uh You remember that? The apartment Yeah, next door. For a long time I used to be in the apartment, my wife and I weekends and Shabbos nights when the apartment next to Allen, and he used to love the Friday night singing and the divrei Torah. It turned that he would ask me, he was sitting outside the door and he would listen in through the window to the singing and the divrei Torah, would ask questions on things that were said. Yeah, he was listening for a long time. For a long time Allen was Allen was there. WE WE WERE NEIGHBORS. >> [applause] >> DO YOU MISS THE SINGING, ALLEN, OR you just happy it's quieter? Yeah, I know. No, I miss that. It's You know he used to come down there every Friday night. It's true. Daniel Klein was very part of that amongst other chevra. We were singing and dancing. Every Friday night I was like, "Okay, 11:30, almost 12:00, ba boom ba boom ba boom." It's true. It's true, Allen. It's true. Yeah, it's true. Good times. Good times. But um yeah. That this this this point I want to go also the mitzvah of sukkah. The mitzvah of sukkah, a person's allowed to eat a achilas arai out of the sukkah. You could have snacks out of the sukkah, that's 100% fine. Person's on a on a trip, on a family trip, their snacks you could have out of the sukkah to really make sure each time we're having a seudah, it's in the sukkah. If a group of friends are talking, go to the sukkah. We're That's That becomes our home. That's this precious mitzvah, this beautiful beautiful mitzvah of sukkah. That's that's a priceless mitzvah of Hashem. It's a whole body experience. Our whole body's in the sukkah. It's kedai to have in mind when you make the bracha leishev basukkah. You make a bracha shehechiyanu v'kiyimanu v'higiyanu lazman hazeh leishev basukkah to have in mind ananei hakavod. To try to think that Hashem surrounded us by ananei hakavod, Hashem's love of us, his want for us. Ananei hakavod, to think about that when you make the bracha leishev basukkah. And to try to to try to be very strong with that precious mitzvah. If what blocks path is ways of chuvah is malgal mitzvos, to laugh and to take mitzvos not seriously, to take mitzvos with more sincerity. Finding out the laws, finding out how to do it. That is that is a path That is definitely a path for chuvah is taking our mitzvos more sincerely, more seriously. I spoke to the guys I spoke to the guys a few days ago. I want to repeat it. This is the yeshiva about honesty. It's also yeshiva about respect for other people. Both those things are important parts of the yeshiva. I want to say that to ask everybody to be more careful with our friends' possessions. Now, I know in the yeshiva maybe some people aren't careful with your possessions. So, we have to bring a different kind of light here. And I'm asking guys to be more careful with their friends' possessions. I spoke about the Rambam speaks about five people in who are not likely He says there are five things that it's unlikely a person's going to do chuva from. And one of the people he says is unlikely, he says ain has custom lashon mayim. A A person's not likely to do chuva. One of those things is oichel misudash ain mastpecas leba'aleha. It's a vac gezel. It's a piece of gezel. If a guy has something and he doesn't have enough for himself, a guy has a can of soda. You say, "Hey, can I have a sip?" And why is the guy going to say yes, see? Does he really want to give you? No, but he's embarrassed. That's stealing. Says the Rambam that's a stealing cuz you're just pressuring him. Guys get a package from home, be very careful not to pressure your roommate. Can I have some of that? Can I have some of that? Very, very dangerous. And even if he says yes, he's just embarrassed. How many guys get something they don't have a lot for themselves? And by the way, you take one of his water bottles, another guy takes another another, he doesn't have enough for himself. To be very, very careful with your friends' stuff. Even stuff that when you ask him he would say yes, that's called the language Masha the Rambam is sudash ain mastpecas leba'aleha. A suda that there's not enough for the one who's having the suda, don't ask the guy, "Can I have some of that?" Don't ask him cuz he might say yes and he's just pressured. I want to say that that all of us This is the Yeshiva that the greatness of the Yeshiva is the honesty. Sincere, authentic, honest, real are all important words here. Let's be more honest and real when it comes to our friends' money. To be more sensitive, it's his thing. To be careful with our friends' stuff. Yes, Schmul. Is this thing about stealing from your parents? The answer is of course to be more careful on our parents' money, for sure. For sure. The Rambam, when he says loving your fellow Yid, gives only a couple of examples, and one is to be chos al momon chaveiri, to be more careful with your friends' money. To be careful with your friends' money, to be more careful. So, I wanted to bring that chizuk, that chizuk of honesty and being more careful with our friends' possessions. I wanted to bring that up. There's a lot more we could learn together. The hour is late. I want to I want to say that there's a minhag Yisrael to ask mechilah from one another. It's an olam chugim, a very beautiful cool people, cool siblings, and ask mechilah. It's not just a cute exchange of mechilah, you mechilah. There's a beauty to it. We're bonding. One of the great commitments we want in this season is to be connected to another Yid, to be connected and appreciating another Yid. That's one of the great We're talking about the light all of us have is to care and be loving and caring to other people. Asking mechilah and being mochel, letting go of taines, letting go of letting go of grudges is a huge huge avodah that Yidden are busy with Erev Yom Kippur. As best as we can, both asking mechilah from people we have wronged, and both being mochel to the best of our ability, forgiving people. It all The main area that we gain when we forgive people is we all have a light to bring to the world. A lot of our own grudges and frustrations distract us from the light that we could shine on the world. If we could be mochel and let go, if we can as best of our ability, somebody asks my Kayla, it's easier. Somebody doesn't ask, it's harder. If we could try to the best of our abilities, to the best of our abilities, we could say [clears throat] I have a light and I have a mission to bring to the world. You know what? Somebody wronged me, just sets up my mission, sets up my purpose, but I'm not going to focus on that. I'm going to try to be my whole that certainly would be a tremendous a tremendous host. The Gamara Rosh Hashanah says whoever is ma'avir al midosav, whoever is moichel others, Hashem's moichel him. L'mi [snorts] na'aseh avon, l'mi she'over al pesha, the Gamara Rosh Hashanah says. Hashem forgives those who forgive others. So I say to us, well, let's try to let's try to dig deep. It's not so easy to let go of resentments, to be moichel people. Sometimes we have to speak it out with somebody. Sometimes we could find it in ourselves to be moichel. All of us are human beings who make mistakes. We are we are our own judge. We are in the we are in that way moichel others, Hashem's moichel us. We become our own judge. If we are kept on him, No. No. No. I refuse to let go. We don't want to be good as best as we can. As best as we can, all of us to try sometime today. People have on our list, what's happening? We're going to go to the mikvah today. That could be even a mitzvah d'oraisa, dunking a mikvah today. We're going to do kaparos, minhag Yisrael, take a dollar or two and go around our head. It's in it's in the machzor for Erev Yom Kippur. So go to the mikvah today, kaparos today. It takes about a minute or two. >> I sent it out. Ah, perfect. Nachum sent it out. So kaparos and then um Seudah. the mikvah, there's a seudah. The seudah, we're going to go to a seudah, fleishig seudah right now. What I want What I want the minhag Yisrael was to ask my Kayla and to be moichel people. touch look to be done today could be done till I shall not have a but best if you do touch with today will be excellent. What I want to ask is is is we talk it be my whole each other as much as you love people we need to ask my whole of from I want to say to everybody there's not a guy I have zero times and any of my whole belief show many guy in Shiva. I ask my whole of sometimes you don't give enough every guy deserves more common more attention. Sometimes I told a guy I would meet with him and I didn't meet with him. That's an affair. You said you wouldn't you didn't I ask my whole of God knows I many of this I ask my whole of from the guys. I hope everybody finds could be my whole and in general today to all work on it sincerely but to speak out with pain not just to think about it to speak out to ask my whole of from somebody and to verbalize I am my whole I'm my whole to try. It's not an easy task if we could find a few minutes today and it's not all or nothing not all or nothing there's a path towards my whole of there's a path you know what starting I see a sham put the situation people don't mean the whole of on Bish Kaga people aren't sinister people aren't like trying to make our life miserable usually and it's it's it's sometimes their own sicknesses their own weaknesses. If we can come to even a degree being my whole to there's a my drag it's not all or nothing. If we could say I have no tightness that's the best. Even we can say you know what I am hurt from them but I have less I have less in my heart there's such a my drag. It's I have a riot of such a my drag and says true for me era your affairs maze that our affairs become shy gig. There's a my drag in lessening affairs. If we could do that to other people we're imitating a sham. So we might be able to be my whole belief shalom. You could turn their averas into mitzvahs. That's like the highest level. But let's say we could say about somebody before we were like livid at, we could say, "You know what? At least I hear that just, you know, I could even have some rachmanus, some pity, some understanding and lessen the degree, the severity of my feelings to them. I think that's a worthwhile pursuit also that my view is less harsh, less stark. I could get I get places like that also. So, I'm asking us all to spend a little time today those beautiful don't take light those Arabian Kippur calls. Sometimes I go, "This is so cheesy." I think it's beautiful. That a Yid calls another Yid is our minhag are gorgeous. Minhagei Yisrael that Yid nest mechila is popular to make fun of it. You my whole you my whole. Don't make fun. Very beautiful. Very beautiful Yid nest. Now, the best is to mean it. It's a talk of mechila. The call of siblings said I don't I don't call my siblings enough. I have to ask them mechila today. You call up then try to change it. If I do the same thing this year won't be a gishmak. But ask mechila be my whole to so don't take it light that minig Yisrael to ask mechila to be my whole and to speak it out but verbally speak it. I am my whole speak it out. There's a minig Yisrael before Kol Nidre people say tfila zaka where they speak out I'm my whole anybody who wronged me. My whole I let go. If you could have a few minutes before Kol Nidre to let go of resentments be emes but sincerely and thoroughly let let go of resentments my tone my name. That would be precious. I wish everybody here a very uplifting, beautiful, easy, healthy tines. It's a day people remember when they were young. Says a youngster Yom Kippur might have been a tough day. I think it's it's an incredibly beautiful, uplifting day of lifnei Hashem Titaru, of purification, of sincerity. Come into the base medrash and join. And join. Sing with the tzibur, daven with the tzibur, and also do your own work. Your own work of focusing on our missions. All of us should be zocheh to a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful day. To an uplifting Yom Kippur. We should all be zocheh to michilas avonos, to the Torah, to the energy that a Yom Kippur. I love coming motzei Yom Kippur. You see some guys with the motzei Yom Kippur glow. Somebody who for a few minutes found the sincerity. Don't I'll tell you something that happened to me. Last year, the first half of the day, I couldn't connect to the day. I was there. I was in shul. I'm I'm supposed to be the rav, a little bit of pressure. I'm here for Rosh Hashanah, for aseres yemei teshuvah, shabbos teshuvah. I felt a little out of sorts. I'm supposed to run the shul. I just came in. And I want to tap in lifnei Hashem. And I was struggling. You never know. You relax. You try to plug in. You do loyally. I was saying what I was supposed to say. And then you never know. Middle of the day, all of a sudden, for one thought, for one minute, for one It's all There could be a very pre-age kind of love my beshachas. Don't be meya'esh. You never know. One guy by the ego, all of a sudden, the gates open up. By the ne'ilah says Hashem, "Woo, he's in." So, you never know when it comes. I want The last thing I want to say, ne'ilah means to be no'el means the gates are closing. Now, it sounds so negative. Yom Kippur, the gates are closing. Get it in quick. I want to say that the attitude I have for the ne'ilah is that I want to get in quickly, cuz I want to get the gates closed, and I want to be stuck inside. Once you're in, you stay in for the whole year. So, I don't picture the gates are closing. Oh, now I looks at the gates are closing, and I made it inside. I got inside there. If If as long as you start your davening before it's my until you continue if that's how I pass. You know why? Cuz you got in, and once you got in, you're in. And I say to everybody, "Yeah, let's get in. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with the day. It might something You might be sorry if at night to a few minutes. By day, you might be You don't know. Relax. Don't be I'm not feeling it. Oh my gosh, somebody told me you're supposed to be loyal, sincere, be patient. I have found the seat of the shamayim Kippur is lifnei Hashem, you'll have your moment. You'll have your time. You'll be sorry for sincerely. The more pressurized, "When is the moment come?" The more pressurized, more often it works for you. The more a person taps in, does what they can, tries to be present, the seat of the shamayim everybody should have a very wonderful, uplifting experience. A good Yom Tov. They'll be a sooner now.