Cholentface: Shabbos Goys

There's another solution. Another solution is to get a Shabbos Goy. A Shabbos Goy is a non-Jew but here's where things get really complicated because with a non-Jew you can't just tell him to break Shabbos for you. You've gotta hint it and he needs to derive benefit from it. You gotta be like okay all right Jean-Claude If you had 1525 unread messages and three of them were very very important how many would you have left? and while you're at it, check the weather so you can benefit too. I had a Shabbos Goy and he joined the Shabbos Goy Union. He was demanding benefits he wanted a retirement package. I tried to fire him but he wouldn't get the hint. Once you're out of Shabbos Goys then it gets really badly awkward because now you've gotta hint to strangers so you gotta go find people on the street who are willing to come into your home. It gets really awkward. You walk outside. Excuse me, Ma'am I'm very hot. No no. I mean... My children are hot No no... This really happened to me one Montreal winter back when I lived right in the middle of the Montreal ghetto in the middle of the Lubavitch comunity, in the Westbury area I walked outside on a freezing winter Shabbos night Freezing. Barely any cars in the roads and I'm thinking, I'm such an idiot. who's gonna walk in the streets at this time of night who's not gonna go in their car and finally after 45 minutes of waiting this woman on the other side of the street walks by. I braced myself. Ok, this is gona be awkward, Zvi, but you gotta do it. I walk across the street... and she goes, "WHICH LIGHT IS OFF?" I was like, "no, actually... do you know how to cut toilet paper?" I really need it, like now! you