Is there such a thing as a Good Samaritan? With Rob Kurtz

there's a reason it's still here 3,000 years later there's a reason that some of the greatest people you've ever met were a part of it and that the impact that people that make up less than 1% of the world that we the impact we have on the world is so spectacularly huge a proportion for who we [Music] are so it's a a great honor and a pleasure to Welcome to our mentorship podcast um Rob who is not a mentor Mentor doesn't begin to describe he's like a super Mentor Mega Mentor is that a good way to say it I was happy with Mentor I think you that's pretty super had three three mentorships correct uh yeah your wife also my wife has two but probably will take another one soon you guys are really rocking it so let's let's Jump Right In I think that people would be kind of curious about a little bit about your background like where did you grow up what's your professional Journey a little bit about your personal Journey let's try to keep it brief but interesting yeah because I don't know interesting um I the most interesting part I guess for our audience is that I grew up totally secular um Suburban Long Island not the parts that most people know out east near the Hamptons um one of I think three or four Jewish kids in my high school um and uh the Hebrew school they're great um I don't know how best best best way to describe Hebrew school um root cause of anti-Semitism in the world I'm not sure um je je jail okay um but uh while there there was a particular Rabbi who took uh great interest he came from he drove quite a distance and he cared about us a lot I loved him and um he sparked a real interest in me in in in my Heritage and I Grand grandmother who um was just all things good in the world and would we'd visit her on Friday nights and she'd cooked everything for everybody's their favorite thing and everybody was a darling and she loved everyone and I loved her and so it was a real contrast between and my parents were very traditional in in their very supportive nature of being Jewish but you know we were like it's completely secular family there was a real contrast for me from like the people I was growing up with and what my family was about and what our background was so it always kind of created a desire of me to to know more but it wasn't until I got to college and actually not until graduate school till I realized I knew absolutely nothing and um and then started looking into it a little bit more where did you go to college and where did you go to graduate school I went to NYU for film school um as an undergrad and I went to uh I went to stay of New York City and I went to law school at Cardoza School of Law and while there there was a rabbi who taught and I just thought it'd be real interesting course on Jewish law and I took that course and that had an incredible impact on me um it's a brief story but it's a worthwhile one because it really had tremendous impact on me there's um in law all the lawyers who may hear this one day there's something called the Good Samaritan Rule which is a very nice rule it's common in American law it's common in English English common law which is the idea of a good Samaran is a good person it's a Christian concept that this the Good Samaritan and the idea be the Good Samaritan Rule is if you're driving down the road and you see somebody's hurt on the side of the road um a Good Samaritan it removes any liability from the nice person who stops to help them you don't have to stop but if you stop people always worry G if I don't know what I'm doing well make things worse can I get sued or am I liable the Good Samaritan Rule comes along to say no you can't take out a hammer hit the guy in the head you can't be grossly negligent but you can try to help and if you in your chance to help you made things worse you're not liable because you trying to help That's Good Samaritan Rule in a nutshell and then I was I had learned that made sense to me it's good thing it's encourage people to do to be good and then in the Jewish I was taking this class in Jewish law it was like one of those moments that just changes everything for you when they class in Jewish law you discover it's there's no such thing as a Good Samaritan there's no such thing as a Good Samaritan because what do you mean you could keep driving down the road your brother's on the side of the road you're liable if you don't stop you must stop what are you talking about you're seeing your brother on the side of the road so the the non-jewish ideas well listen you can keep going but we'd like you to stop the Jewish ideaas you can't keep going you have an obligation to stop and help him and I remember sitting in that class I remember raising my hand and asking whether ibody to repeat that and he then realized because almost everybody in the class was an observant person who knew basic Jewish law but I didn't so everybody was like looking me like what's your problem don't you get this I what do you mean you're obligated to stop and it just this light bul went off of of a system of obligations rather than a system of Bill of Rights because growing up to that point I was a happy American the greatest document in the world to me was a Bill of Rights and these are all our rights there are no rights in in Torah you know and I went to it just it made me want to like I started reading everything I could and learn anything I could about the idea of a system that you are expecting to be much greater than your Bas based person you have obligations in the world and you're born into obligation and not born it to rights and that was just a really huge defining moment for me I mean fantastic really did you become a law did you become a lawyer or did you I I finished law school and took the bar and took past the bar to make my parents happy but I never practiced law for D um I uh maybe you went to law school because you needed that realization from that one professor in Cordo cordozo no it's either that or the fact that it was great for you know meeting girls um and it definitely um helped U my wife get over the really bad pled sweater I was wearing in our first date so and maybe that helped but um otherwise I have no idea why I went to law school um and did you did you stay in New York or you went to California to chase your dreams what happens the day after the bar exam I went to California and uh and um I uh yeah I wanted to trace that dream that's what I always I always wanted to be a writer and did you did you did that rematerialize yeah yeah I I I wrote for sitcoms for more than 10 years I wrote feature that posted behind me um and I still I I'm a creative lead at a studio right now we make a lot of content for mostly for kids and families and and uh in the streaming world yeah that was that was the bulk of my um creative career anyway that's amazing that's wonderful and I'm assuming just tell the people who are tuning in over here that you're Mar I know you're married I know you have kids I know you have grandkids I've met your wife she's a rock star and I haven't met your kids but if they follow their parents I think they're probably pretty good no um they're pretty awesome yeah um actually my son CJ learns with I think they're mayor guys on he when he was here he's in Yeshiva and Israel but when he was here he was learning with guys on Monday nights on the upper west side um I think from ruter and he did a the program in Montana where he was one of the um the group leaders in Montana and he's got a whole bunch of guys that come out into Israel Vis with him so he's he loves um he loves being involved with with c and um my daughters I think have guests all the time yeah so we they're it's a family it's a family thing they grow up with lots of people around the shabas table who uh didn't didn't themselves not grow up around Javas tables and um we consider it our part of our our role in this world okay so you know most people that I talk to and I asked them I suggest them if they'd like to become a mentor happens to be Jewish people are very special and I think it's fair to say that over 90% say yes very few people say yes they're mte Mente there's a few out there but you know I think we have like one in Toronto and maybe like one in England and that's it um hey you're a busy guy I know that and what is it about mentorship that you find compelling that you want to do this that you're you're you know you're involved you're devoted and to call SP Spade I don't know how many people know this but when we try to cook off mentorship in a substantial way you in the Long Island area getting met Long Island area you and your wife were our ambassadors you kind of took it up from the ground level so what pulls you what draws you about it um on a serious side people mentored me okay on the on the less sincer side what you were saying before about how Jews are different yeah we just like to tell everybody what to do um you know but but I more serious yeah people were mentors to me and people helped me enormously in in the world and and it's a really great thing when with in a simple conversation or a shabas invitation or just sharing an idea from the paraa can really impact people being somebody who was once impacted yeah was over 30 years ago but somebody who was impacted by those conversations once you know the power of it how do you uh it's how do you how do you not want to share it and you know one of the one of the guys that I mentored is now in Israel learning and you know I can't even keep up with him anymore he's just on fire you know but so so I don't know you know there are certain people in the world that whenever they discover something good whether and I think Jews are totally like this whether it's a restaurant or a book you got to read shampoo you just yeah you just got to tell everybody about it and they all have to do it and you know whatever it is you have that's really good you got to tell everybody about it's really good so if you feel that way about a book or a restaurant or a place you went on vacation how do you not feel that way about the whole point of our lives and to you know like you take me back to like you said you know because you had amazing mentors you wanted to you know give that back if you want to call that can you share with me one or two of the people in your past who were your mentors who were life-changing or just were phenomenal um I still have them many of them um but uh you know throughout there were different ones there was there was that Rabbi in Hebrew school I mentioned before he's no longer with us um you know he had been drafted into the NFL and chose to become a rabbi instead you know so I his path really was unbelievable to me he a strong powerful guy and uh well you didn't want to make him upset in Hebrew school that's for sure because he he could punt you but he was when he got angry it was not good but I will say this but when he loved you man he loved you in a way that you know secular teachers can't I mean probably against the law but he he he you know he he was the first time I ever had choas was when he would invite us to his home and meet his family and his kids in Oceanside and his name was Rabbi Jeff wartenberg he was an unbelievable person in my life um Rabbi wartenberg is the kind of person the ass assimilation rate suffi County where I grew up is like 70 80% was crazy and he taught in our Hebrew school I don't know for 20 years a little tiny ew school and only one person ever married it and I think it I think I don't think he was ever at peace with it I think it killed him um wow so you know because after you meet people like that you you touched you touched your 3,000 year old tradition you're not you know just some girl some girl named Mary is going to do it after raway that's for sure um so he was one it was a person in professionally not as a writer but just as a person his name is Howard Sterling was a a mentor to me in La when I first got out there and Howard played a big role in my life in in the fact that I they used to he was one of the chairmans of APAC and I was very involved with APAC and they had their meetings at the Beverly Hills Hotel and there's so much to admire about Howard but the thing that sticks with me always is that Beverly hotel has this big drive up driveway in an LA cars are Beyond status symbols they're they're mini Goods you know what you drive is who you are and there was Howard who is easily one of the most successful people in the whole city forget the hotel and you know he had a four tourist and I just and I when that four tourist pulled up and everybody else would like look at who the schlep and and he would get in go rob want to ride and I'd be like yeah really I do and it was just you know it was it was uh he was a tremendous is a tremendous person and um he taught me a lot and he actually told me one time when I was home for the holidays when I was in LA my home was in New York he said I want you go to place ASA tour and you're going to meet some people there they're gonna you they'll invite you I he made a phone call or two for lunch and it changed everything because I I didn't even know I was like sure I'll go over there and I forgot what y other think it was this over 30 years ago they all became very close dear friends and ultimately I moved from the beach into town to be part of the whole Community there my friends were there the rabbis there were just I love them all and so he played a huge role in my life and currently there's a rabbi that I met when I was in Israel 20 some OD years ago 25 20 more wow years ago um his name is Rabbi Natan Lopez cardoo Rabbi cardoo sure played a huge role in my life huge still does and um he he gave me my my my reala towards My Philosophy towards Judaism and that was um it was a call to dignity was his his whole thing was the king is is showing you how to live in his Palace and and that that was what he taught and was his Torah that's what he said everything you're learning here is he's teaching the king is teaching you had to live like a prince how to be royal in his Palace question is are you is this what you yearn for is this what you want do you want to be on that level do you want to be royalty or do you want to be something less than that and he would challeng regular yeah and he would challenge you to to want to be royalty and that's what he you know and that that philosophy has stayed with me always Robert if you had because there's a lot of people that are gonna be watching this God willing and oh really if you could I apologize you're famous and you had an opportunity to to have a one- hour conversation with a young professional that's starting off you know they've got bright eyes and they're looking ahead towards hopefully a glamorous career and a great relationship with somebody and a wonderful family and kids and you have an opportunity to talk to them for one hour and probably 90% of what you're going to say they're going to forget uh what's the one enduring understanding that you would love to impart to them something that they can come back to that they could think about from time to time as the many different you know stops on their Journey unfold um wow there's so many different possible answers to that question I love that you're thinking guys if you're watching this he thinks that's what you should take from him um I what would be there's so many different approaches to what I would want to share with him um I would want to share with him the idea um okay I'll tell you what El I would share with them so on yum Kipper on yum Kipper we have the ales we're saying I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry most of us are raised to believe like you know you feel bad you're feeling bad for the things you you did well but I had a rabbi his name was Dove H always said to me God doesn't ask you to be anything you can't be so see those as I know I'm so much better than this I know I can be better I know there's I know I'm I know I'm levels higher and I fell down but please let me get back up I fell down let me get back up and I that's how I go through yum Kipper every year now and it's the fastest day of the year for me it's not about fasting it's not anything it's because I'm I'm remembering what I got wrong and what I got right that day it's the whole day to do my recap on the year so why would I say that to somebody now and hoping that they would stick one thing would stick in their mind is that Judaism is big into two you fell down get back up and in order to get back up and become something unbelievably better than you ever thought you could be dive into this dive into this because it's a prescript there's a reason it's still here 3,000 years later there's a reason that some some of the greatest people you've ever met were a part of it and that the impact that people that make up less than 1% of the world that we the impact we have on the world is so spectacularly huge out of proportion for who we are and our size and everything look at Israel I mean look what the accomplishments just in America 1% of the population 30% of the government you know own every Everything Everything maybe too much that's a different conversation but there's something powerful here and that power belongs to you and you should grab into that power there's only one way to grab into that power you have to grab the rabbi landal of the world and say teach this to me what is this what am because I didn't grow up no way this so teach it to me I want to know who these people were because yob and Abram and Sarah and Rifka those aren't names from the past those are that's your blood that's your blood and if you understand that there's royal blood flowing through your veins but you have no idea since somebody's got to come along and say to you you don't even know you're a prince forgive the son of my my here you don't even know you're a prince or a queen or a princess but there are people walking around Nam Rabbi landal you know Rabbi Lynn and all the other wonderful rabbis who are basically saying my whole life is about letting you know by the way you're a prince and that that girl next to you and she's talking about the Ed you know the her job working on Madison Avenue you're talking about her your job you're both Prince you're both royalty you come from an unbelievable chain but you don't know what that is because after 3,000 years of being kicked around all around the world you're not really sure who you are so go find out do that for yourself just go find out who you are who this is because all you know right now is your parents told you you're Jewish what is that what does it mean and why are we so unbelievably great and why do really awful people hate us that's a good thing to know when you see anti-Semitism in the world it's never great people who are anti-semites there always horrible horrible people why do horrible people hate us maybe they just hate greatness so what is this greatness that we're a part of what is this and and when you find out what it is oh man then you tapped into amazing you tapped into something really deep really unbelievable I'll tell you I'll tell you something amazing I was once in the Metro in Washington DC and you know you go down like 500 steps to get to the mentro and some of the stations there and there's this African guy stand not African-American African African from like I don't know heart of African continent and the guy the guy looks at me and he sees I'm wearing a keepa he's probably a new immigrant and he says to me and I'm not gonna imitate him although I really could because I'm really good with imitations he says to me are you a Hebrew and I'm like hebra I've never been called that before I said I guess I'm a Jew he says one second are are you a descendant of Abraham Isaac and Jacob I said yeah he says King Solomon yes I happen to have like a genealogy that takes me back to King David he goes oh my gosh then you are royalty to me and I remember like thank God the Metro came and I didn't have to continue the conversation because it was starting to get a little odd but I remember like it's swirly in my mind I am royalty why is he the only one that sees it why don't we look in the mirror and see it ourselves so your point is amazing and it's awesome I want to ask you just like one final like one final questione please please sure um so for for somebody who's on the fence be a mentor um they're they're pulled in so many different directions and they're giving back to the community they have a family and they have and they have a job and they they try to work on self-development and they study Torah and they're just they're pulling a lot of different directions we're asking them to to be M let's say for a half an hour a week give me your elevator pitch what would you tell them why should they do it I'm doing great why why do I need this well you're asking the wrong guy because I think we should be giving more than half an hour a week but I I um um because I can tell from me I said because you don't really know what real simpa is it's one thing with your own children but it's another to do something I've been blessed to do many times in my life and that's to go to the K of somebody where you're sitting there at Thea remembering the first time you met them and who they are now and that you played the smallest the biggest whatever that you played any role in that and you look at them and you can't even believe this this person going up there and you just open open the door for them to say here's here's here's who you could be here's what you could be here's here's your heritage here's your genal here's your here's everything maybe they came to you for sabbaths maybe they just talked business with you but you were the first religious person they ever met and it changed their world and I don't know how many mentees mentors get to go to their mentees you know I don't know how the relationship say I certainly feel close to mine that I hope to be at their weddings one day but it's an amazing experience it's an amazing experience and I've I've had the opportunity and you you try never to let it just be something else to know that you you played the role in another human being and then when you meet then they get married and you bump into them a few years later and you see their kids in the street and you're and you walk away and it's a mistake not to sit there and say oh my God I remember we're supposed to not remember we're supposed to say okay that was then this is now look at an amazing person they are but it's okay for that moment to sit there and go I remember when I first met them and and look what they've became it I played a little piece of that wow that's it's so funny that you're saying this because just last night we've got there was a young lady who lived across the street from me when I was a rabbi in East brunic I think I met her when she was like 13 or 14 and they're living out of town they're not living in the uh tri- state area and they happen to have been in town you know for the for the winter break and they came by to our house her and her husband she's got like five kids they're amazing they're wonderful and like me and my wife think to each other you know we remember when 14-year-old girl was not you know we no one would have ever dreamed that her husband would be a teacher in the local Jewish Day School that they would have this incredibly amazing home steeped in Tradition and warmth and kindness etc etc and no I don't think we were the ones that had you know that changed anything but like you said maybe we just opened the door we had them over for chabis and this young lady became very much part of our family and like we're not taking any credit but it you you're I think you're allowed to sometimes look in the mirror and be like wow it's so amazing to see what this person became and it does make you feel good inside for sure makes you feel good and you get to say Hashem thank you for let me be a part of that because I got to play a role and I got to play a role in that and you go to these things that's all you get to do is because you know you get to play you get to be the guy who said come on in and and and these those are hopefully friendships that will last a long time and it's just it's different than relationship by far it's very different relationship with your kids and with your co-workers because it's somebody who's saying hey help me and help me out here and you get to say yeah let me see how I can help you out and a real relationship I I I mean the other mentors I met over the over last year and told me that they became you know some came closer than others but they all had a real a real CER it's beautiful thing great Rob I'm so grateful that you've been part of this already for the last about two years right now and your wife was also amazing and I think one day I hope my prayer my dream one day is that like when this thing is big and like every amazing Jewish successful man and woman says you know I want to be I want to connect with another Jewish person it'll be like that that you're sitting in the audience and you'll be like listen I open the door a little bit then you'll have that Nas you'll have that Pride you'll have that fulfillment so God will like that's a that's the dream here yeah the dream is to see to see that to see that whole world that that happened in there and say I got to be a part of this that's all you just get to be a part it's pretty amazing well we're so grateful thank you so much Hashem should bless you entire family and together we should Savor the success that I think we're going to amen amen and like I said hon and up thank you so much Rob I really appreciate your time all the best to you [Music] bye