R' Daniel Mechanic Answers To The Project Inspire Convention 2023

as I had mentioned in my in the two presentations I made already I have had this horse to visit an ongoing basis 420 yeshivas and vasiakos and day schools and all types and I've had this Roseburg Hashem to speak to over 300 000 firm teenagers and Council many many many hundreds so I have my pulse I think I have the pulse of the community and um I'll let you in on a very big secret our kids have lots and lots of questions some of these questions are actually asked majority of them are not asked and they remain inside our kids our adults and in many cases is really eats away it eats away at them so let me share with you and this is what I really wish everyone would be here whoever's coming but I have in my hand is the results of a very sophisticated survey that was done about 15 years ago for 1400 base yaakov girls in a camp summer setting when it's calm you know maybe kids are more open and what they did is they asked 1400 girls from all the base yacos Across America and Canada representing all the different types I can read to you all the names but all the basicles and they asked the girls the following question to write an answer anonymously if you could be in a room with a rabbi and ask them any question you want what would be your 10 questions that you would ask okay so it was Anonymous these were you know base hack of girls let's say higher grades 11th and 12th grade and that the question should not be written in the order of how much like what's your number one question what's your second biggest question not like that just jot down 10 questions not in the order of how much it bothers you okay you got it and I have the results here this was really done carefully 15 years ago I believe the questions some of them would be different today you ready 327 of these 1400 girls included this is one of their 10 questions what is wrong with talking to boys so Akash is under 73 who didn't write that so that was the biggest one 1327 included that question as the top 10 questions that they would ask a rabbi in a privately anonymously 1276 of them what is wrong with listening to non-jewish music three what's the third 1093 Harris work right Hashem new all the foods that I ate today for breakfast because my wife wasn't there Hashem knew exactly what I'd eat and what brachi'd make and that I would make of Russia so I have to make the bracha he knew beforehand so how could I get reward for that I'm a robot we're all robots right I just went like this with my hand like Hashem do that three seconds ago that I was gonna do that famous questions 1081 said all about sneakers where the Allah Etc again where were the other 300 girls how could 300 girls not include that as one of their 10 questions they want to discuss it's interesting 956 of these 1400 said how do we know that Judaism is true right three billion Christians and Muslims how do we know you describe his truth 937 how are we supposed to love yiddishkite if we don't feel a connection to Hashem or tadavaning or the Shabbos don't feel connected I've already had I can't think of how many kids have come over to me in the last two days I don't feel connected then I should do all these weird stuff like you know what is all these you know interesting things okay uh 903 of them asked what is the mashiach all about what's going to happen when mashiach comes you know we could drive cars and the answer is of course okay um 872 work in other words you know remote says you could use a tea bag in the schlichi on Shabbos and the Khazana says that you were Mikhail shab is no shutter for you who's right and then the mother says they're both right and then the kids go huh and then they say how does the hotel the hotel thing what else oh how does Fila work they died with a million a million Fearless for this person they passed away anyway right how does Fila work that was the 10th question what's interesting fascinating is not one that that very insignificant the number one question of all suffering as a shemalao suffering right that's the question that interesting today that's the question well technology is the first question that that they would all be asking me about all the things about technology but I mean it was ass but it wasn't from the biggies those are the top ten interesting nope it'd be a lot it would be different today I believe now over the years many dozens of principles rabbis have made Panic phone calls to my office and they continue to do so in an almost daily basis asking me to meet with yet another kid who has serious questions they have questions in their Muna and be tahon and and sadik varalo and practice like some of the things that we said here and it's not only teenagers and Seminary girls and adults married people of all ages have met with me over the last 30 years to discuss with me there are serious questions on uh on yiddishkite which of course can all be effectively answered except for the suffering one that could be effective answers I don't know about answer it could be effective approaches answers not really and we're not talking here about off the Derek people and people who are not religious anymore no commit us here so this has been my experience and um answers to these questions are readily available they're there in this form of the ram Khao the Derek Hashem rubby are you Kaplan very Victor Miller's books the stipler's farm the answers that you go into any sperm store there's so many books out there I remember how did I get into all this it's very interesting I'm not going to tell you the whole story but when I was a teenager someone approached me a friend of mine that I don't believe I don't know if I believe in Hashem anymore and I was like are you out of your mind like what are you crazy and it was so bothered me I was 16 years old I went and I bought 10 hash kafa books I read them all backwards and forwards and then I used to learn with this person an hour every shot was before and I would show them and prove to them that Torah was true when Hashem exists and I was really good at it because today the person said I'm firmer than me and that's how I kind of got into this but there's so so much out there and many of our kids they're emerging from their 12 years of you know High School in in elementary school they're emerging from these experiences and we're dealing now with the best system in the history of Israel at this point that's a reality yet they leave their their experience of their childhood without these the compelling reasons for why they're from and they're unable to effectively and passionately explain to themselves or to others you know why do I keep telling mitzvahs and we are talking here about the alephase of yiddishkite Hashem is perfect and infinite he has no needs why did he create this world it doesn't get anything out of our filos or our cabanos or Yom Kippur Torah hashem's perfect why do you give us a Torah Hashem needs us to tell him he doesn't inferiority complex like basic questions do you think how do we know it's always true three billion Christians and Muslims out there who think that we're all going to uh down there how we can expect our children to love yiddishka and be inspired if if they can't you know effectively answer the basics sitting on an airplane next to someone from Israeli who says why are you doing this to be able to really explain it and when their questions are answered this is what I do all day for the last 30 years and when they're answered you have no idea what a profound impact this has on them I have thousands of emails texts letters from kids parents principals over the years describing to me how when they clearly understood that Torah is emis it's true yes the inevitable of a roasting inevitable the Sonos okay well the magazine covers through we have the MS what that does for them it's so powerful so let's begin in order to effectively answer kids questions or anyone's questions you have to it's crucial you have to first know where is the question coming from is it coming from their heart or their brain 97 of the time it's their heart if that's where the questions are really coming from and to know what's causing them to ask these questions I remember many many years ago many years ago I don't know at least 25 years my secretary I'm going to talk quickly my secretary tells me uh there's some basakov girl who's got issues she needs to talk to someone okay it's like 25 years ago all I know about the girls that she's a girl that's what I know and that she's 18 and when and is in 12th grade in the base yaakov and her brothers learning Lakewood and brisk okay so I got a kind of picture here so I tell I said tell her to call me so this girl calls me up one night hi hi how's the weather okay then I say this is exactly how it went down and I know she lives in the in between Flatbush and Borough Park that area so I say all right what could I do for you here's what the girl says to me I'm not sure I want to be from anymore I said you're not sure or you have already turned on a light on Shabbos kids do that they turn on a light and they're waiting for the lightning did it happen oh take a piece of chicken and put cheese on it and stick in the microwave let's see what happens I asked where are you holding he said you're not sure you're already not firm she goes like this no no no no I haven't done any of those things and then she screams into the phone yet and then she starts screaming at me I got the chills now screaming at me I'm sick and tired of this time and I'm gonna Chuck this whole thing with a Chuck this whole thing and she's going on and on so when she's all finished I go why would you not want to be from anymore you just got these gorgeous that's what he's out there why would that want to be from anymore she said look you don't know me but I'm a very intelligent girl and I've had serious questions my whole life and the school that I went to no way could I answer these ask these questions and if I found a mower during recess I could ask these questions to I was not satisfied with these answers and therefore I'm sick and tired of being hypocrite I'm sick and tired of this I'm chucking the whole thing so I said what's your name honey so like I said in my previous speech you got to add the law listen to me I am going to answer every single question you have no I said I promise you I'm going to answer every single question you have and I promise you you're going to be satisfied so she goes okay good that's why they told me to call you I said okay go swimming go I go go what are your questions choose now on the phone I go yeah what are your questions and they'll write them down you come into my office tomorrow I'll answer your questions so she started she had 14 questions each question took a few minutes you know we had to understand what it was and I wrote a damn question one all about Hashem how do you know Hashem exists who made him what does he do all day uh things ah so the creator of the Swiss Alps she says to me cares about one inch of yarn over my elbow Holocaust suffering pain what about the million billions of Christians and Muslims what about the whole scientist Revolution and all that stuff all her different questions and we went through each they wrote them all down 14 questions got it 20 minutes later I then sent into the phone so so these are your main questions yes I have a few more but these are the main questions and they say that of course you don't have the answers to these questions you want to go off the Derek and be Mahalo Shabbos and I said and eat on Yom Kippur she goes yeah I waited a few seconds I have no idea who this girl is and I went like this why do you hate your parents so much five seconds later I hear sniffling 10 seconds later crying 15 seconds later uncontrollable sobs and in between the sobs they said when you calm down call me back and they hung up actually going back two hours later and her story was ahara a real horror her parents were not bad people they were mentally ill they were very sick people there was serious abuse going on in this home together with my friends we removed they're in the whole story we removed their in the middle of the night we removed her and one other sibling from the home we have apartments that we have around Brooklyn where we have to hide people that's a long story and We Gather an apartment I raised fifteen thousand dollars from my friends within a few days to pay for her very very serious therapy with a with a you know highly respected professional and got her a job and took care of her life okay three months later I came back to her when things were settled down as I finally a member you call me you want to go to there because of your questions she goes all right yeah oh yeah okay now you're ready now let me answer your questions now Hey listen to this year come to this speech I'm giving read this book and over two weeks I answered all of her questions what's the point of the story her problem was not her scuffle questions although they need to be answered that's part of the process of her healing they need to be answered that wasn't a problem problem was pain suffering anger anguish resentment that was the problem you got to know where the questions coming from and therefore you have to talk to the heart sometimes all they need is some challenge vatconsumable songs and then the hashkafa questions don't bother them so much sometimes listen to this one again you gotta know where these questions are coming from you know I have a highly an interesting life listen to this this is I don't know 15 years ago I pick up the phone in my office I go like this hello and on the other law and the person on the other side goes you got five minutes to prove it that's how it started your hair I go hello you got five minutes to prove it so I'm thinking inside here we go I go prove what he goes you know uh toyra he didn't see he didn't say Torah toyra I go mm-hmm can I ask you a question would you call up Albert Einstein and say hey Albert listen that theory of relativity equals mc squared listen you got five minutes to explain to me I said where's your intellectual honesty he says to me you now have four minutes now you have to know how to do he needs to be put in his place I said listen here buddy all I need is one minute so now we have three minutes to play with I'm not so sure I want to give you my one minute I'm a busy guy I don't know I'm not so sure so I'll make a deal with you you keep to the deal I'll give you my one minute and show you how it's all true I want you to promise me that if I'm successful and I show you that there's exists and the toe is true and I'm successful I didn't I asked him by the way are you from no you keep Shabbos no do you eat on Yom Kippur yes I said I want you to promise me I'll give you the minute that if I'm successful and I prove to you whether it's all Ms that you will not change anything you will continue to be not from he goes what I said I want you to promise me that if I prove everything to you you will not do chuva you will continue to eat on Yom Kippur he started so he's like what are you talking about I said it again do I have that promise from you you will not he says Rabbi obviously if you prove it to me you know I gotta start you know what do you say put on thrilling I said that's right if I'm if I'm successful you're gonna have to change your whole life and you don't want that for no matter what I say to Hashem himself could appear to you you ain't changing your life there's a price tag if I'm successful you hear what I'm saying he hung the phone up hung up on me some people would be oh did I do a mistake it's diary diverse I may have messed everything up here oh you give up no no no no because I'm not gonna be I'm wasting my time with him and he called me back three months later and oh did he not like his Tati oh you give Vault that was the problem the humongous hole in his heart his hatred for any and anything that had hairs on the face you know the hatred when he went through prove it not prove it he needed challenge they needed some little TLC he needs to be shown that his questions you ready do you really want to hear Emma's let's sit down and talk right you got to know where the question's coming from you have to disarm I have to disarm this intellectual arrogance you hear One More Story I was asked to speak in a school for Russian boys school for Russian this is a long time ago right all these boys and parents came out from Russia they're all atheists they knew nothing about either Skype but they sent their kids to Yeshiva because they didn't want him to be in the public school with you know what's going on in the button though you don't know what's going on but what's going on in the public school so I am brought into this room with 100 you know boy Russians 11th and 12th grade boys they'd rather be at a dentist getting a root canal then listening to me tell them Torah so how do we get them you got to get them in the first few minutes so if you were there yesterday when I spoke about the the Hollywood stars I started telling them about the Hollywood stars and that's it I had them I spoke for two and a half hours Baruch Hashem Bloom away Taurus emis now before I started speaking to somebody asked the principal anyone here I should be wary of he goes yeah every single one I go okay is there anyone in particular to anyone that I should really look out for so the principal has this look in his eyes oh yeah one guy his name is Michael 12th grader six foot four 240 pounds he's not because the principal tells me and he's an Eloy he's a genius and he's an atheist and the principal tells me know what this boy does he eats on Yom Kippur he then writes that on a piece of paper what I ate on Yom Kippur you know blintzes fries you know he makes 100 copies come see the Yeshiva the next day and every boy walking into the basement with his thrill he hands each boy a paper what I ate in Yom Kippur principal says watch out for that guy I'm like how do you keep this boy in Yeshiva like what is going on here he says Rabbi we can't send him out he'll go to public school and he'll marry uh you know Christina so we made a deal with him you want to ask for questions fantastic we're the only religion in the world that wants our teenagers to ask if I give a share and a buck or slugs me up show that I know what I'm still know what I'm talking about will you marry my daughter please I want you for son-in-law that's all you didn't know are we the questions we love questions but there's a normal way to do it the principal told them you want to stay in this Yeshiva he was six foot four so he's scoring 50 points every basketball game because the Yeshiva Boys are four foot six so he wants to he knew he wasn't saying Yeshiva this boy so they made a deal with him you have questions no problem but you got to do it normally ask your abame during recess during lunch what's a Shabbos whatever it is the principle says when I told the boys that mechanic is coming this guy came banging on my door now could I finally get up in front of the whole school and say would I have to stay against Hashem and the Torah so the principal puts his arm around my shoulder he says so we have Unleashed him you hear it's like come in I had them in the palm of my hands within a few minutes awesome for two and a half hours the Epicor was sat in the back did not say a word to me say finish I figured I'm not bad not bad God's good as I'm about to leave the room I see him walking towards me with three of his buddies their muscles had muscles right and World War Three is about to happen all the baham the rabaim who had let were leaving they hopped that World War III is going to happen they all came running back in surrounded us yeah the whole thing and Chris there's Mike bottom line is a whole long story I'll shorten it he says to be Rabbi every word you said no what do you say I listened to every word you said and you're a liar 17 year old kid to the Rabb boy in front of 200 you know 150 kids you're a lawyer because there is no God the Torah is not true and and he either said shame on you or you should be ashamed of yourself for teaching this nonsense he used other flowery words because I Look to Him I go wow you don't believe in Hashem he goes no I said so where did the first thing come from the first thing go all the way back thousands of you just go all the way back Evolution that Evolution go all the way back to the first physical thing in this world who made that he goes Nobody that goes through you're saying the world's been here forever yeah I could have to schmattered him by showing him how all the scientists today and all they're all like they all will tell you there was a beginning the big bang that the Big Bang is very good for the Jews means they believe in the first word of the tiger gracious let them spend some time with me we'll get them to the next fewer the barelo Kim we'll get to that the gracious time space matter energy all came it all started there was a beginning I could have showed him that but I wanted to do what I wanted to do I kicked everybody oh I said you want to have a debate about this do I want to have a debate I've been looking for a guy like you for years you better want to have a debate bottom line is I pulled him into a room I sat him down I said okay we're gonna have a debate I cleared my calendar and I said you believe in Hashem no you believe in the Torah no you believe in anything no I don't believe in anything I'm here to play ball who do you say to me was great I'm here to play ball get a diploma make a lot of money buy stuff and then die that's what he said to me character so I said okay we're gonna have a debate but before we start I want to ask you something um so you don't believe in anything you're hearing Yeshiva and you've said all the boys know you don't believe in anything I'm just I'm just curious did you ever read any of Aristotle's books greatest greatest non-jewish philosopher of all time the Ramba mentions them in his firm Aristo Aristotle you ever read anything from Aristotle he goes no I go you never read anything from Aristotle he's like no I go wait wait wait Plato Socrates no uh-huh oh maybe you're just into the Jewish philosophers let's try them there was a man named the rambam he wrote a safer called the the Volcan it's one thousand pages long proving everything that you're denying I'm just curious did you ever read anything from the rumbum no you ever read the the safer uh the first uh the first 40 pages is called the the first cause proof of hashem's existence is brilliant you ever read that it's in English you ever read that no you ever read the quizzari the kuzare wrote a say for hundreds of pages along prove English you ever read that no you ever read kamu Nicha Spinoza David um heschel some other words I came up with he never read anything this is what I did to him I would never do this to a girl or a skinny ninth grade boy you gotta know when to do this I picked myself up I put my arm around his shoulder and I said Michael you're making such a mistake you are not an atheist you're an idiot and when he finished laughing I added and a jerk now you got to know when to do that some kids will don't need therapy for 50 years from that you know he could handle it and he understood my point what's my point you don't know enough to be an IP chorus you know nothing you never read anything he said you should have said to me I hate davening hate it boring that's an intelligent statement go to the Brussels of Romanian but second by The kaisal Who will you who like davening but you're allowed to say it no I don't like them I hate my Rebellion you're allowed to say that I mean that's intelligent statement you hate your arabellum have a relationship with me I promise you you'll like Rebellion I hate Shabbos that's what you should have said to me I'm bored that's an intelligent statement you come to me for Jarvis like he did for six months except twice when there was a snowstorm and today he's plowing through shots married lots of kendallah and loves Hashem you see what my channel does to someone spiritually and physically my wife's phone the point is all he's doing is vibrating his vocal cords I could also do that watch this I'm a bird I said it he said I mean you don't know anything through your research now once in a while you meet someone who did read all the books did read everything and he still and he went to Asia Torah never to throw on the Yeshiva and he still doesn't believe I say to him I respect you you're wrong and when I meet you in the next World you're going to be a little bit embarrassed 97 of people with phds and who knows but I don't believe in this and I don't believe in that I don't believe in the same goes to the Holocaust it's interesting I'm just curious did you go over the 20 000 Bubbies and zadies in Borough Park who who have numbers in their arm and they went through Auschwitz and and the wives are saying to heal him all day the husbands are planning through shots and they love Hashem yes there are others who went off but did you do your research did you say hi I'm a 17 year old boy with pizza shooting hopes the Holocaust but I see you went through it and you do believe in Hashem could you explain how does that work did you do your research I think sneeze is so stupid oh that's so interesting you you read all of gila mandelson's books you you spoke to the hundreds of millions of from women over the last few thousand years who thought it was the most liberating beautiful thing in the world did you do your research you know again when I talked to him it's not this arrogantly and condescendingly it's a little nicer right point is you got to know where the questions are coming from okay now let's go through some of the questions you want to do that yeah why not what time is it okay what's wrong with talking to boys nothing wrong what's wrong with touching a hot stove nothing wrong it's dangerous you could go to the gas station and the guy comes over uh sure Phil or you know High test or low to I have to speak to boys you go buy some milk for your mother and you got it with the guy at the counter um could you put the change over there I don't speak to boys no it's ridiculous I'm speaking to you right but girls are smart you got to reframe the question because deep down they know wrong nothing wrong it's dangerous every relationship begins with a conversation I tell the young ladies who ask me this question every relationship begins you have to have that conversation it's not a moral issue it is a safety issue and then you reframe the question so say to them um so what you're meaning to ask me is how come all the adults in my life I wrote it down here how come all the adults in my life who care about me and love me constantly warn me not to have unnecessary conversation with people who have no interest except you know to use me oh is that your question oh okay that's it what's wrong nothing wrong it's dangerous make that answer you got to reframe it what's wrong with the second question what's wrong what's wrong with listening non-jewish music nothing's wrong Beethoven I mean anything wrong is that a morality issue it's it's more a it's it's the problem is that the message the message that the vast majority of this music is conveying has to make you feel inside is it productive does it help you become the person that you want when you pass away at 120 and your children say your husband for you and what are the what do you want your kids to say wow my mother she really knew how to dance you know to these guys whatever it is you want them to say is that you know what's productive for you what helps you in your life in nurturing you're in a shama and this music is problematic it is not conducive to that it may even be destructive that is the way you answer the question you reframe it okay what else I'm giving you every one of these questions really requires 45 minutes but we only have in the 15 minutes so we're doing quick sound bite answers okay the behavioral question famous question it's interesting how this bothers girls much much more than it bothers boys that's the reality certain questions all the questions on Taurus bothers the girls the girls have five of them boys doesn't bother them at all interesting we'll get to it the behave a question if Hashem knows at three o'clock that I am going to get taken Apple at 305 pick up the Apple make a boy prayer eights and eat it how could I have bahira I have to pick up the Apple make a block on it Hashem with three o'clock at 305 then I'm gonna do that right you got the question the rambam asked this question I told you ready you want to see a beautiful answer you're going to mishnais but look at them first from there it's so easy to understand that it's beautiful here's the quick sound bite answer to that question if Hashem knows what I'm gonna do at three o'clock 305 the answer is Hashem those the question doesn't begin it's like you're playing baseball and they ask you if you scored a touchdown for those of you who understand Healthcare Sports it doesn't apply the question only can apply and make sense in the world of time where there's a three o'clock and a 305. Hashem does not exist in time for us the second just passed the second just passed we all changed in the last second all of our cells in our body became one second older we are changing Hashem is perfect there is no change there is no time he's outside of that therefore when you say Hashem knows at three o'clock stop right there he did not know anything it's three o'clock or 305. there is no past there is no present there is no future by Hashem there's no timeline and if you really want to get deep and it's very scary you learn to Derek Hashem on this from hashem's angle right now when you can't even say right now because that's time but right now there is no world well at the same exact moment he just created the world mashiach is coming simultaneously we're leaving with Ryan he's giving a Torah mechanics talking to you it's there's no timeline there's no past present and future it just is Hashem is outside of that he sees all history all trillions of human beings making their behavior decisions it's one reality whatever that means go ask a baby at a bris what do you think of the economic situation in America okay well that's what's going on here we're trying to we're trying to be like Hashem understand Hashem is that that Hashem knows what I'm gonna do with three o'clock at three or four in hashem's world we didn't eat the apple we ate the apple we're going to eat the apple it's all one thing whatever that means but it has to be if you understand what what this is all about the question doesn't begin and the muscle I could give you is imagine I go into the future I go into a machine I go into the future and I see that I don't know this boy over here in 15 seconds is going to lift his hand and scratch his head that's what I see in the future he's going to lift his hand and scratch his head I come back in my machine to the present and I'm teaching you now I happen to know that he is going through exercises in 15 seconds because I've been there and back does the fact that I know this travel through the air under his arm and pick up his elbow make him scratch his head no Hashem exists simultaneously at every moment in history whatever that means therefore it's not that we answer the question it doesn't begin it's based on a false premise of time got it of course not but that's reality okay that's the behavior question what's the exactly is there was no but the people came late they were we did a whole survey there were 10 major questions that the that the 1400 basico girls had in a certain survey so question for all about sneas look I will just quote to you what one of the biggest post-game in the world everyone in this room knows his name one of the biggest posts in the world said to me years ago I'm quoting one of the biggest gosh I can't read my handwriting ah okay we are doing a terrible disservice to our girls by imposing on them unnecessary and unrequired humorous it is absolutely crucial that we teach them the difference when we're teaching is that we teach them the difference between foreign and you know it says over there um um can't be righteous can't Millennial but righteous can't know the MS and he explains because yes why can't the yamaharas just watch what everybody else does watch what for me eating how they how they do things and then he'll know how to behave how to do Mrs properly says the reviac of kamenetsky because they if you don't know the difference between and minhog you will come to do the wrong thing and you can't be accustomed that's all I'm going to say about this about sneeze you have to know the difference between this and this Min hug okay prove that Judaism is true maybe I'll save that for the uh for the end you could talk hours about that look the basics I did this I've been doing this for years we have the basics we have a mime and harcina we are not a religion we are what's called a massora a religion there were there's 15 000 religions out there 14 999 of them all began with one person making a claim with no Witnesses this is the reality it's hard to believe but billions of people are following religions were the first moment that religion was a prophet saying the lord gave me a book and no one saw it they themselves will tell you that there's no Adam so therefore told a matter of Faith the function of your emotional desire I don't have an emotional desire of this statement Abraham Lincoln was the president of the United States that is a historical fact I've had a gun to my head and had to bet my life my wife my children my even my Bobby was there a man named George Washington who was the president of the United States was there a man named The Ville nagon was there a man named the belshemtov this is not something believe that no historical fact what do you mean I I never saw the I I never I never sort of a KeyBank here I never serve uh the vinegarine there are no pictures there's no videos I know 100 I also know there was a Super Bowl a few weeks ago I didn't speak to a single person who was there I did not see anything I did not hear anything nothing so in the newspaper I would bet my life my children my wife Chloe's throughout every human being that I know 100 sure there was a Super Bowl how do I know because it's all about Adam you take a look at the safer right he writes it beautifully it's all about Adam you know how I know there was a villain going because hundreds and hundreds of thousands of Jews over many years passed through vilna and saw him came home to the Kindle lock and told them at the Shoppers table and they told their kids they told their kids and that's how we know that's how we know there was a first world there was a Civil War in America hang on the Civil War maybe it's all made up and all the pictures maybe it's all made up of course millions of people experienced it and told their children they told their children was passed down it's all about Aiden and we have three million Aiden everybody else is one and this is what we have to tell our children and like I told them if you heard me those who didn't hear me speak it's all about the pace of seder that's it was passed down how many pace of Saddam separate us and the first one ETS with Rahim 40. don't forget that not 334 or 35 40. every pace of seder has 80 90 years there grandparents kids Generations so there's about 40 of them since our Sinai what's 40 garnished the truth of the Torah so we pass this on to our kids what else did they ask let's see I don't feel a connection to Hashem I was asked last night three girls okay I don't feel a connection I said could you please tell me what is it that you're going to feel that you could say well now I have a connection what is it you're looking for Define it I don't have a connection to Hashem okay tell me did you ever have a connection yeah there was years ago I felt it but then this girl in my class's mother died and we adopted so much and now I don't feel a connection so this connection that you felt before that happened what was it I don't know it like well no Hawaiian would say people came we come to the castle I know I didn't feel anything so you'd say well if I told you that you when you go down there you're going to feel a buff stick what's a buffalo stick you have to Define it what does it mean to feel I like to tell this story I like to tell the story of when kids ask me this question I'm not feeling it when I was 17 years old this is September 1976. eriv young Kipper it's a long story but I was in a taxi together with the Godel Hadar of some I was 17 somehow I'm a character I got in three hours before Yom Kippur decided to go to the castle Well everybody's at home having this pseudomo seconds there's a mechanic with his you know gray hat at that time 50 years ago with the Godzilla during his grandson and the taxi driver we get to the castle or the police they see that zombies there they open up the gates and we drive all the way down to the castle there was two or three people around three hours for Yom Kippur there's some zombies gets out of the car I'm gonna shorten the story he must have been about 75 years old then foreign he pulls out his sitter that must have been 800 years old he opens it up and I was standing on the side of the 17 year old kid I did zero diving zero to Helen I was just watching the guadaladar and his whole face I can't I can't I got the chills though he's like an angel a malach whose Mama's shaking and diving into tears started and he's diving care for about 15 feet from the castle and you saw this man he was mommish feeling the caduce and I'm standing there watching this suddenly a holy khayal appears Israeli soldier is watching over us so that I could sit and learn suvus and Cultura and this with a paper yarmak on his head so clearly he's not from with a machine gun across his chest with the whole style thing so he's standing here you know looking at the coattail and I remember me I was a 17 year old kid I look at him I look at represent and I remember thinking just you'll excuse me it's a stupid wall just a wall a rocks it's a wall oh it's old man he was really feeling the caducea he wasn't lying because I was lying really I don't feel nothing it's all baloney but my job is to be a Russia Shiva so I'm going to fake it no he was feeling it it was real it was there Yom Kippur and this guy was feeling nothing zero I remember thinking but it's the same rule how come this guy feels nothing and response feels a ton of kadusha the answer is it's all about having that antenna right right now in this room there's one billion phone calls going through this room in the world if you have the right phone and the right frequency you could pick up that phone call had an antenna to pick up kadusha where do you get that antenna from my voters Hashem it was 75 years in confusion this guy doesn't have the antenna pick it up he can't so any girl or boy the country I don't feel anything that's because their antenna was crushed perhaps it was crushed from a horrific home experience or trauma or pain or whatever it is some of them their intent is not it's not crushed it's broken so when do you get the antenna many boys and girls 10th 11th 12th graders start to get that antenna to feel Yiddish guide and Shabbos as gavaldik many of them especially the girls that year in seminary they get it they get the antenna to pick up ah caduce and many of them for girls at least you're sitting at a table you're married for three years with a man who really treats you well with a beautiful kid not as beautiful as mine and you look around wow this is gavalik it's all about the intent of the clay cable that's pretty much how I approach a kid is I don't feel it what is it you want to feel and and maybe not feeling it because it's not a problem with Yiddish guy I feel it I'm not lying okay okay what else we go on what do we do with the um and also on te Fila Rogue quality stroll I believe has a very very wrong understanding of trilo they think Fila is diving is you come to Hashem with a list of things you want you ask him and he either gives it to you or he doesn't give it to you no Hashem knows before you dive in what you're gonna ask for he knows what you need what you don't need right dominance that you're informing Hashem what you want and what you need and no Hashem will give you what you need or what you don't need do you want to know what the happening is a husband and wife how do they bond gives her nice cards and flowers and he's good there's ways that human beings Bond with certain actions how do we bond with Hashem you ready how Hashem made our nishamas it's so interesting the way in the shama bonds with Hashem is by asking him for things the very Act of asking hi can you please give me this that is what bonds You by saying attogiber you are great Hashem doesn't need that we bond with him by saying you are so great that turkey burn saying nishmas and this and that how does an ishama bond with Hashem by asking for things and telling Hashem how great he is that is what feel is really all about oh you this person is is you want them not to have it Hashem knows you know whether they're going to what should be and what should not be but davening is not a laundry list of what you want okay listen to this sir Moshe Feinstein poskins we all know keeping Shabbos one of the malacca's is special cooking so he allowed to use a tea bag in a clearly shown what are you talking special what about a clicheni also clocus okay watch this what about a cliche like 700 swarm on it so our Moshe Feinstein paskins putting a tea bag into cliche lichi is not Bishop finished holds you know it looks like they tastes like tea smells like tea it's tea so they have a difference I'm not going to get into the whole wonders of this they have a difference of opinions so once his mother wants his user so the girls and the boys they asked everybody who's right they're both right how could they both be right very easy you ready what is the square root of four two and and minus two opposite answers that are the correct answer and they're the opposite it's like a cup that has filled the head up to the halfway point with soda is it half full or half empty both so if you're a depressed person if empty and if you're putting you know you're Chiller yeah I got a half a cup of soda look at that versus salmon have a cup of Fresca valik they're both right depends how you look at it they're not arguing two people in the room one says the lights are on the other person says the lights are off you cannot both be right that is an impossibility if that lights on lights off it's how you look at it Moshe looks at least says yeah but it depends the different ways of looking what is the visual process and how do you define it and therefore they could both be right and then we have a process how help sock Works in America we basically follow a Maisha and Eric and therefore we all make t sense right we all know this stuff girls have five questions girls haven't touched about that hey how do you know there was a Taurus maybe Hashem said go keep shopping don't do means chill do you know however you feel comfortable you're on a beach with a cigar and a martini saying No Limit who says the two-hour answer in four seconds there's not a single midst that you could do in the toy room without a tarishable pet really what about keep it of aim don't curse your parents don't hate your parents really without a Taurus aim three questions are instantaneous one what if your father's a gentile your mother married a gentile you are as Jewish as Maisha bainu for a gentile father too what if you're adopted three what if you're severely abused by your parents and everything you know don't kill finished the terrorist wants to stab you go yeah go right here no we have Taurus of course there is a few hours for that second question girls have is why not because I'd get a get a hernia and supposed Tyra I have a safer at home that's 47 answers to that three who's right no not who's right why is there so much my clocus produce a situation that if you're in high school and there's a halaka test and you don't know the answer go um you got the right answer how could Yiddish kind of have so much unsurdy everything's in my Locust answer nothing's about Locus 99.9 of yedish kite there is no much Locus pesos coming this side of the audience is gonna start reading these 500 page books pesach and it makes you crazy when I could summarize all there have been millions of pages of written on I could summarize all of pesach according to the Torah in one second finished is there's so many men hug him how you do the Kara 700 swarm the brux minig 5000. but basics 99 of the few things in the theoraces okay what's the fourth question who's right which we answered already they're both right five is how do you know the tertiary pay remained intact maybe on hercinia when Hashem said a pre-ates other a beautiful Fruit by sukas then Hashem Whisperer Orange maybe for a thousand years even with carry around Lulu's and oranges and then they were Cyrus said it morphed into an esrogue here's how we know in 1948 when millions of Yeadon started to come there with Israel and over the next three four five years millions of Jews from all over the world South Northeast Norway England France everybody came there with Israel Millions and Circus Time everybody whipped out an esserig no one had a watermelon or an orange and when it said young Chua in the Torah no one was blowing their nose or going everyone pull out a chauffeur they stole the turtle remained intact I mean I could give thousands of examples like this okay let's finish up with supposed to finish yes he's gonna come in here in a minute okay suffering the biggest question of all why is Hashem allow suffering why is he allow pain we all know everyone in this room knows a horrific tragedy may have even experienced a horrific tragedy here's the answer you ready you've waited your whole life the answer is I don't know that is the answer we will not know until the second we die at 120. and the second we die we're going to be like oh my you oh that's why the hell that's why my mother did that's why my that's why I was born to this family that's why my father that's why I was born rich that's where I was born poor each one has its issues the cutscare everyone said could you imagine if we understood hashem's motives of pain oh that's why this person became an armada oh that's why this person got sick then he's a regular guy like us we understand him we know his motivations we're going to serve a Hashem that we understand everything about oh that's why this person suffered and that's why this person I think it's brilliant but it's number one question we cannot spend our lives asking why we're not going to have an answer that's satisfactory oh you could delude yourself that's the reason but I'm not gonna it's a wrong question don't ask why ask what what am I going to do with this pain now what am I going to do with the suffering ahead so I went through you got to be kidding me I hope it's all the rooms not just me you gotta ask what you know by the there's an organization called Ned Mothers Against Drunk Driving these are two non-jewish women whose children were killed by drunk drivers so instead of you know can you imagine losing a child so instead of crying their whole life they have saved hundreds of thousands of kids this whole thing that all of our sons coming up for him everyone knows the designated driver right one guy who doesn't drink the rahmanas case who doesn't drink I remember my son was when my son was going crazy the one year that he had to be the designated where does that come from from these non-jewish women the whole thing Mothers Against the whole concept of designated driver and the millions of videos that have been seen and shown and oh they got together and said what am I going to do with this so there are people out there that have suffered horrific tragedies you know what they do instead of saying why okay what am I gonna do with this you know what my husband passed away Young I will be there for all the women who have children who who their husband passed away young and they could come to me and I could show them how I got out of it and how I came to love Hashem more well the girl who was brought up in a home with her parents they're like just impossible they have no idea to be parents and they're so damaged to kids so I tell them you will go you'll be healthy now you'll go get married you'll go have children and then I'm gonna send to you lots and lots of kids who grew up in homes that were dysfunctional and you will show them how despite that here's how you can grow and here's how you could be a you know successful have a successful life and that's what has to be with suffering and pain and all this we're not going to have an answer but you could either let it you know put you deeper and deeper into quicksand or you're going to figure out a way to get out of it and use that to help other people so I'm concluding basically you know our kids have lots of questions we have to do what we can and our kids have to know with absolute conviction we have the MS we have a tourismus a shraine um we're from and then we dive in for them and we could be assured our kids will remain on the Derek hayasher thank you have a good day