Rabbi Binyamin Yuhanan - Parenting - Building Your Children’s Character by Personal Example

[Music] do [Music] welcome everyone good evening today we're continuing our study of how to be better parents and today we are learning how to develop your children's character how to prepare them for life and how to make them better people and we're gonna see that the best way to do that is by personal example even though every parent has a desire to raise good children and to educate his children properly that desire itself is not enough you need a lot of knowledge it's a an art but with all the knowledge and with all the education you're gonna give your children with all the lectures you're gonna tell them and the rebukes and all the guidance you're gonna give them that's not enough what they see at home what they see how their father and how their mother are behaving how they're speaking will have as much effect on them as all their education if not more and sometimes people make a mistake they think you know i'm gonna be myself i'm just going to do whatever i like and um my children i'm gonna send them to yeshiva their school is gonna take care of their education and uh that's a big mistake yeshiva is very limited because they have a lot of material to cover and so the the the the rabbeim the mo road and the teachers they're busy imparting the information they're not paying so much attention to teach students by example there is no time the student doesn't see so much how the the teacher interacts with others how they are kind and how they control their anger and how they are not egoistic sometimes they actually do see it i remember when i was teaching 10th 10th grade chemistry class in yeshiva at the end of the class on the last day of class one student came to me and he said rabbi thank you very much i learned so much from you and i thought he's gonna say i learned a lot from the classes i i like the way you teach but he said no i paid attention how even though we tried to make you angry you never got angry how you controlled yourself and you i i appreciated his comment i felt good so it is possible to teach students in yeshiva but for most teachers and for most liberty it's too hard and also they don't spend enough time with them to observe but at home from early age and all vacations and all weekends and all evenings and mornings they observe their parents and they learn more than from books and more than from from the yeshiva but there is another reason why the behavior of parents has such an effect on children by buhari people there is an idea of avlot each family is described by a nickname we call it a lot comes from the hebrew word of or beit of which means an extended family and in shidduchim or when you meet someone and you want to know what kind of person they are you ask not only their name but also you ask what is your of lord what is there of lord what is this girls or voice of lord what does avlot mean it means if i want to know what kind of a person they are going to be i want to know what family they're coming from and that's what um avlot means it's a nickname that's given to a family based on their behavior or based on their profession or on on a certain negative fame that they have or sometimes on the way they look and uh when i was young i didn't like it i said what kind of thing is this to judge people based on their family and then i started observing and i noticed that my friend he behaves like his father and his father behaves like his grandfather and it bothered me and i said what kind of thing is this why can't the my friend stop doing the bad things that his father was doing and why can't his father change himself and start behaving better if they see that people are making fun of them they even made a nickname for them why don't they come out of it let's say there's a family that are famous for them before they're being greedy let's just say so why do they keep that nickname why don't they actively change and say i don't want to be called greedy i'm not going to be greedy i'm going to make sure that that name is going to be forgotten it's no longer going to apply to me but in most cases it doesn't happen whatever the name is given to their of law to their extended family sticks with them from generation to generation but does it have to be that way the way your grandparents were and that's how your parents are and that's how you will have to be in most cases it is the truth only rarely we see that people rise up and they struggle out of their nickname out of their afloat so this is one reason why a parent should be eager should be careful to change his behavior because you can't take the risk oh it's okay my children will will fix it it's okay i'm already stuck my children will do a better job no your children are not gonna do better just statistics show that they're not gonna climb out of that that uh recognition so the whole hope is on you you if you recognize that something is wrong i don't want to be like my parents in a bad way of course i'll take whatever good they give me so i have to do something about it i have to change it i will speak late about ideas that that you can concentrate on and try to change but the change has to come from you if you leave it for your parents that negative behavior that habit that addiction that has been in generation will continue being in your family and it's going to only be rooted deeper because it's an additional generation that it's in your family if you notice something negative change it right now don't leave it for your children don't make their burden heavier and just to show you that it is possible but it's very difficult i want to tell you a story about ronald reagan ronald reagan was born into an unstable shaky troubled family he was a child of an alcoholic his father couldn't make ends meet and because of his worry and depression he started drinking and he became an alcoholic and his mother ronald's mother would tell him that you know your father has a disease that that forces him to behave a certain way that he cannot control and when he grew up he told himself i have a choice to make i can either become like my father an alcoholic that's the easiest choice i'm just gonna go in his footsteps or i can be different i can choose to be better and he said i don't want to be like my father i will be different and he became the president of the united states so it is possible but how many people do you know that their parents were alcoholics and they're not again statistics show that majority of people follow their parents example they are alcoholics just like their parents were they are angry just like their parents or their greedy just like their parents are they're arrogant just like their parents are so even though for ronald reagan it worked out and for many of us it did many of us are ballet even though our parents were not familiar with judaism but it requires a lot of work so again make it easier for your children whatever you can do don't leave it for your children have pity on your children the more you fix the easier your children's life will be the most successful they will be because they will already start they'll start on a higher level from the beginning and another reason why it's difficult for children to change their parents mistakes why it's it works like this that children inherit their parents faults is because our children are not only our physical descendants they're also our spiritual descendants we understand that we have genes and and the genes dictate that we're gonna look our like our parents and uh we're gonna be we will have certain basic character traits just like our parents those traits that are built into our genes but besides that we're also spiritual descendants of our parents so what does it mean when adam is shown the first man sinned when he transgressed god's word death was decreed upon him so god had to find a way for him to continue so hashem said don't worry even though you will die but your children will continue after you so god took his soul and split it into 248 parts and distributed those parts into his descendants and now the mistake that adam made he tried to fix it in his lifetime and then when he died his children tried to fix that mistake the problem is that while they were fixing adam's mistake they were making their own mistakes and their children had to fix now not only adam's mistakes but also their direct parents and grandparents why is that because just like adam's neshama adam's soul was split and put into his children so to every one of us when we have children they don't receive a strange new new soul but rather it's an extension of our soul it's like there is a branch and there are smaller branches and then even smaller branches so from my neshama come my children's neshamot and therefore their spiritual makeup their spiritual dna is the same as mine just like their genes are the same as mine and therefore since each neshama is sent into this world for a mission i have to accomplish certain tasks if i pass my tests and my challenges then they are counted as fixed my children don't have the same tests anymore but if i fail in my tests then those tests go to my children because we share the shaman our spiritual identity is the same and whatever the root nishaman did not accomplish it stays for children to accomplish and therefore don't think oh i failed it's okay my children will be better no if you failed then the same challenge will be given to your children by failing not only you're not accomplishing your mission but you're making it harder for your children whatever you don't fix in your character trade whatever you don't do for your mission remains for your children to do and we don't want to burden our children we don't want to be the ones at fault for making our children's lives difficult for putting them through so many challenges not that our children will not have a way to grow but they will start higher and their ch challenges will not be base course challenges but they're going to be on a higher level there will already be fine-tuning their mission their tikkun and that's what happens in families that have a vlot that is basic they're still working on passions on greed and anger in families where their ancestors worked on themselves and fixed the basic character traits now they're working on higher ones so this is another reason to have pity on your children and to say even if i made mistakes i will not leave it at that i will not say this is who i am this is who my parents are i'm not going to change because we are sentencing our own children for hard life and for for the same challenges that we went through in that the the the talmud tells us that there are certain things that the reward for doing them is is given to us in this world but the main reward stays in the next world and the talmud lists them and two of these things are arising early to go to learn torah and waking up your children and raise and raising them and sending them to study torah and the question is asked why the why is it in this order the number one mitzvah for which you get the reward in this world and the majority stays in the next world is when you learn torah yourself number two is when you raise your children to be on the torah path and the answer given is that it cannot be in any other order you cannot hope to raise your children to go on the path of torah if you yourself don't rise early to to to go to study torah which means your children observe you and when they see that you do it then they will follow if you do good behavior yourself then you have a chance of speaking to your children and telling them this is good to do otherwise they'll look at you as a hypocrite and say you don't do it yourself why are you telling us if you tell children oh don't scream and you yourself are screaming the whole day they're genuinely gonna be just like you if you tell your children don't get angry and you yourself get angry at them they're not gonna listen to your your rebuke they're gonna listen to your behavior and uh the common refrain don't do like i do do like i say doesn't make sense and children know it and and they will say you know even if is the right thing yes we recognize it's good to be nice it's good to be kind it's good to be patient but look at my parents they were not able to overcome their character that means i'm not alone it's not so bad okay i'm gonna be like my parents what's so bad about it so you're making it harder for your children when you don't show the good behavior yourself again don't just teach them about good behavior show them the good behavior now let's actually give some examples of how you can help your children by working on yourself and what to avoid showing your children which will be in their mind when they grow up you know when when a child gets old and gets married and in his subconscious mind he always asks himself what should i do in this situation his spouse comes and presses his buttons and every time his wife will press his buttons he's gonna think how did my father behave when my mother pressed his buttons he comes home and the the dinner is not ready he's going to say what did my father do when he came home and dinner was not ready well i remember he got angry he started throwing things he started calling names so that's the right thing and the right way that's what the child is going to start doing even though when his father was doing it he disapproved of it the child looked at his father and said look at this this stupid guy look at him well like a child he's behaving he can't control himself but when the child is going to grow up he's going to behave exactly like that because in the time of in the time of stress at a time when you have to make a quick decision what decision are you gonna make the one that's gonna come easy the one that's gonna just flow go with the flow uh what is it what's programmed in your head what's problems in your head what you saw your parents doing whatever you saw your parents do that's what you're gonna do and that is why we look at the the at the parents and look at the siblings when we choose a spouse because what the the person saw in their house will stay in their mind and at the time of pressing need when they have to make decision quickly instead of thinking they will just do what they saw in their parents home so if you don't want your children to grow up and reveal what kind of family they came from to their spouse and their in-laws and your future grandchildren make sure you show good example to them and uh just one example when your spouse angers you remember that my children are watching they will absorb everything i do my children are watching and they will copy me they will do what i do and i don't want them to be angry to their spouse so i will remain calm and if my wife will do something that i don't like if my wife will press my buttons for the sake of my children and to change their spiritual dna i will remain calm it's not about me and my wife it's about the greater challenge it's about the test that god gives me will i put an extra brick to build my mission to build my palace that i will give as inheritance to my children or will i view my interaction with my wife as a temporary attack on my ego and i will say i will not let it slide i will defend my ego and i will attack my wife back and i will get angry and i will show her is that what i'm here for in my life for temporarily raising my ego for my arrogance i will show her who i am and who she is or is my life for something greater to accomplish my mission to raise my children properly so that for future generations they will refer to our family as a good of lord and not as a lowly of lord so whatever negative character traits that you want to display whether it's arrogance jealousy anger seeking honor think before you display it especially if your children are around do i want my children to see it do i want this image of their father or their mother being angry disrespectful selfish to be imprinted on their minds do i want that picture of negative my negative self to be forever programmed into their mind and they will behave exactly like me or at least for fake at least for just pretend i will behave in a good way maybe that's not who i am but i will pretend why even if inside i'm angry but at least i want to put a positive image in their minds even if i don't change myself but i will fake it until they make it and when they grow up and they go to their spouses they will say my father behaved like this my mother behaved like that even though inside their father and mother were weak and full of bad character traits but at least on the outside they behaved well but it it's gonna benefit us as well because the way you behave outside has an effect on your inside if on the outside you smile for a few seconds you will see that you will become smiling on the inside if on the outside you stay calm you don't allow you yourself to get excited then on the inside you will remain calm and even though what you're trying to do is just to trick your children to thinking that you are at sadiq that you are it's addicted that you are good you will not only trick your children you will also trick yourself and eventually you will become a psychic you will become it's adequate you will become good so if it's hard for you to change yourself permanently at least pretend and if you pretend long enough it will develop into into a habit it will become a new you so let's go through some things that we should try to show our children and through our example they will build their character okay number one it's good to show that we trust god it's good to express our ammuna in hashem it's good to speak about hashem whether hashem is watching or our trust in hashem it's good to speak about how hashem helped you how you rely on him how you pray to him and how you ask him for help and uh it's it's important that when something happens to you where you see hashem's hand in your life you should share it with your children whether daily or write it down and by shabbat table speak about it this way children will understand and see that god is involved in my parents life that hashem helps my parents hashem likes my parents he comes and helps them children will be proud of their parents they will say wow my parents are so close to god god is always helping them and then children will start paying attention to their own life one rabbi even said to their children i will pay you a dollar every time you notice how god is involved in your life and that was the best investment his children then were on a lookout the whole day and every day they came and they shared with their parents oh mommy i was late on the bus and i said hashem please help me and right there i saw that the the bus got and i saw that the bus got stuck just for enough seconds that i came on it and they will come and they will amaze you with all the stories that happen to them throughout the day and it's those few dollars will be very well spent similarly it's important for parents to speak about olamaba to say i want a good all i'm about i want a big i wish hashem gives me a big i don't want to make mistakes it's important to speak about your fear of heaven that i want to keep all the laws properly i don't want to make a mistake because if i make mistake then i'll have to spend another few seconds in the in vietnam i don't want to do that show that you are careful in your observance if you're about to say la it's good if you stop but also tell your children about it they don't know what struggle you had inside of you say oh i was about to say but i controlled myself or say something happened someone was making me annoyed and i was about to get angry and then i controlled myself speak to your children about your victories and certainly never get angry in front of them not to your spouse and not towards your children if your spouse disrespects you don't disrespect them back stay calm because you are being observed it's like there's a camera on you and someone is watching and there are many cameras on you each one of your child has two precious cameras directed at you and their hard drive their memory stick does does not get full the memory never gets erased they remember everything and all the words you said all the faces you made the temper that you showed is going to be recorded and saved so always stay calm and respectful and they will see that someone said something nasty to you and you stayed calm they will remember it and for that reason it's a good idea that uh children should see how their parents are arguing it's okay for children to see that that parents have disagreements it's it's fine but only if they don't go out of hand if your children see that yes the father said this and the mother said that and one got upset at the other and they had a discussion they had a disagreement they had a little fight but then they resolved it then they forgave each other then they hugged and they laughed together that would be such a powerful lesson for your children if your children will see how to have a peaceful argument how to resolve your differences how to forgive each other how to forget how to restore peace in the family that's very important even though it is recommended usually to avoid arguing in front of children but if you know that usually you dissolve your arguments peacefully then go ahead and have fights in front of your children because even though they'll see that their parents fight but it's worth it because they will see how to stay calm they will see how to resolve your differences and how to stay friends and continue loving each other despite your differences another important lesson you can show your children is spending wisely because many problems in life in marriage come because one of the spouses doesn't know how to manage their finances how why because they saw that their parents were were overspending they were wasting their money they were spending on luxuries they were not keeping within the budget and when they grow up they have exactly the same behavior so make sure that you seek help if necessary from a financial advisor or a friend who who knows how to do it better and make sure to teach your children when you go to a store with your children say to them i really want to buy this but i have to ask myself if i really need it and a few times and again even if it's hard for you to do it for real at least pretend go to the store with them and say i really want this even if you don't want i really want this but it's something that we can't really afford so i'm not going to buy it or i would like to have it but it's just going to create more clutter at home so i'm not going to buy well i really want it but i really don't need it i can live without it i really want it but it's unnecessary luxury and go past it don't buy it and your children will learn strength from you they will see that wow i can be just like my parents next time i want ice cream gum cookie candy i'm gonna ask myself do i really need it maybe it's unnecessary can i afford it you will be teaching your children such important skills you will save them thousands of dollars you may save their marriage because finances put a lot of burden on a couple and a lot of times it's because they overspend because they don't know how to manage their finance we know that on rosh hashanah hashem provides you with all the money you may need for that year and why are some people stressed out because of money because they don't use the money that god gives them properly they spend too much they buy things that are not necessary they buy according to a higher level of lifestyle than they really should be on and hashem says i gave you enough what did you do with the money so it's our responsibility to show our children example how to manage our money properly another very important uh lesson is to be optimistic when you are optimistic when you are happy about life about the world about other people about events you're giving your children such a great gift that means that no matter what challenges they're gonna have in life they will stay happy but if you are grouchy depressed then you are hurting your children so even if even if you feel you have nothing to be happy about have pity on your children and smile say when i come home even though i have so much trouble at work my boss my clients the finances i'm gonna smile because what what is it my children's fault that my business is not going well why should they suffer it's not their fault when i come home i'm gonna be in a good mood when i hear something on the news i'm not gonna say oh again oh what's gonna be no why should they worry about it when i hear a bad news i'm gonna hide it from my children or if they heard it also i'm gonna say it's okay we'll trust hashem it's gonna be okay we'll overcome it it's gonna pass let's focus on the good and even if you don't believe in it but at least pretend and say it in any way by the way one of the best ways to create a happy mood in yourself is to smile for fake stretch your lips for 10 seconds count until 10 and by the time you reach you're going to be overjoyed you're going to be so happy so if you have nothing to smile about smile anyway for 10 seconds and then you're gonna smile and then everyone around you will start smiling and you're gonna have a happy home and by the way if your husband is grouchy then you smile and he's gonna get happy if your wife is grouchy start smiling around her and she will become happy another important area to work on is your communication skills don't say oh that's how i am that's what i learned from my parents that's how i talk no get yourself a book a lecture a mentor and start learning how to talk better because your children will absorb your way of communicating and they will copy your tone of voice your intonation if you're speaking in a grouchy way in an angry way they're going to speak exactly the same way i once had a a rabbi and he told us that his son had issues with his voice he had hoarse voice he was losing his voice and they didn't know why they took him to all kinds of doctors and nobody knew what's wrong with him they did all kinds of tests and they didn't find anything wrong until they met one smart doctor and he said to the father you know why your son has such a voice you know why he's suffering because of you because you have such a voice he's copying your voice and once they realize that then they train the child to develop his own voice not to copy the father's voice children copy our voices they copy our words our way of expression and they're going to be exactly same communicators as we are so learn how to speak in a more polite way in a more pleasant way in a more respectful way learn which words are better to use which words are toxic and to be avoided because you're gonna make your children's life better and you're gonna change their destiny they're of lord the entire entire family forever in addition to the the words you choose you also have to teach them how to ignore offenses how to forgive how to resolve conflicts how to give in how to consider someone else's point of view and you can teach it to them by showing it to them when your child comes to you and speaks to you look in his eyes even though you're tired or even though you're busy and you need to rush to your next project say to yourself it's important to him it's important for my child that i listen to him that i look at him that i approve what he's saying i appreciate what he's saying that i smile with him that i'm concerned with him this will teach him communication skills next time when he is talking to someone he will also look at them you will also be patient you will also be understanding and teach your children how to be excited about serving hashem when you do meet sword be happy be excited run be quick zerizu when you prepare for shabbat say le let's buy good food let's prepare good food let's put in effort let's clean the house let's make the house beautiful make midsole exciting and again even if it's difficult for you just for pretend say it anyway they will not know that you're pretending and they will think that you're really excited and they will think that it's the right thing to be excited whatever you do you put on succeed you put on tethylene for a lady you you put on meat parrot you put on a wig or head covering say it's such a good thing it saves me so much time i don't have to worry about my hair style so it's so good to to just put on a key a head head covering i say this to my children all the time when i was young i wasn't religious i always had to carry a hairbrush with me to brush my hair make sure that my hair doesn't stand up now it's so easy i choose the biggest yamaka the biggest kippah i just put it on and hashem for the past 20 years i didn't have any problems with my hair turn everything into into a an exciting description of why keeping hashem's meets what is so good one of the most important lessons we can give our children is commitment to torah study you have to show your children that torah study is important for you how do you do that tell them i'm going to learn torah don't just leave the house let's say you're going to a class you're going to study with your tell them about it say would they ask you where are you going oh it's not your business yeah most of the time it's not their business but when you're going to do a mitzvah tell them i'm going to learn i'm going to pray open a book at home and read let them see that you're not only eating and sleeping at home or watching your phone or tv let them know that learning is important for you and if possible even learn at home with your havruta make a phone call facetime and even try waking up a few minutes before your children let's say you don't have much time to learn at home but learn for the few minutes before they wake up so that when they wake up they see their father is learning they assume you were learning the whole night and before they go to sleep sit down and start learning and as they are they're going to sleep you say goodbye i have to learn and they go to sleep thinking oh my father is going to learn the whole night even if you cannot learn for a long time but at least pretend give them this good feeling that my father is a talmud my father loves learning my father appreciates torah when they grow up they're not gonna know that you only tricked them and you did it for a few minutes they're gonna really think that you woke up two hours before they and you learn and you stayed up two hours after they went to sleep so these are just some tricks of the trade even if you cannot do it for real do it for fake speak about what you appreciate say wow that that person he learns from so much i wish i could be like him make plans make a schedule in front of them oh at this time i'm going to learn this at this time i'm going to learn this and even discuss certain books that your dream to learn oh i wish one day i'm gonna i'm gonna finish uh the talmud make soon why i wish i'm gonna finish mishnayot well i wish i'm gonna learn speak about all the wonderful books that that you dream even if it's unlikely that you're gonna but by the way every person is is uh expected every jew is expected to finish the entire torah in his lifetime and therefore actually make a plan to learn miscellatis from cover to cover many times all the other books of ethics of mussar in addition to halacha and uh and everything everything and speak about it and show your love for books by buying them with a plan that you're going to learn them and every time you buy a book be excited wow such a good book i i can't wait until i start learning it and of course you have to be honest in front of your children make sure you don't lie because if you lie and they catch you for them not only your your esteem is going to be lowered not going to respect you but they're going to learn that it's okay to lie they're going to lie to you and they're going to lie to their spouse and go lie to the children and to the boss and they might be caught not a good um trait to teach your your children now when you say blessings at home say it out loud and you can even say it in a singing way even if you don't feel it even if you don't feel hashem in front of you but say it for your children when you say asher yatsar stop and say it slowly out loud let them see that ashariatsar is important when you say sit down get dressed wash your hands take a bench take a sidoo and say it slowly sing it enjoy the words you will give such a such a blessing to your children they will say birkat amazon with understanding with feeling and they will receive so many blessings from hashem wealth and with concentration and show your children that birkat amazon is important blessings are important before you say blessing on food and stuff it in your mouth say the blessing slowly out loud and uh when you when you go to synagogue go early show your children that synagogue is important and when you take them with you show them that you pray slowly don't rush and then start looking around don't talk in a synagogue because you want your children to appreciate prayer to appreciate their service to hashem to appreciate their communication with a god with god come on time don't rush out choose a minion that's slow and tell your children about it i'm choosing this minion because they don't talk here i'm choosing this minyan because they pray slowly because i want to feel the words i want to speak to hashem i want to express my feelings to him and another very important lesson we can give our children is to ask for advice when we need it and therefore they should know that you have a rabbi get for yourself a rabbi get for yourself a mentor and call your brother in front of your children rabbi is such and such thing happened what do i do rabbi what should i do this or that rabbi what should i do with myself in life this way your children will learn a very powerful lesson that it's okay to ask for help it's okay to ask for advice it's okay to ask others for their opinion it's good to learn from others you will expand their horizons and you will give them permission you will allow them to learn from others you will also teach them importance to have someone on top of you to have to respect authority that the world is not hefcken it's not do you do whatever you want it's important to have someone who guides you someone who oversees you someone who supervises you and one last thing for today is teach your children to appreciate world's beauty this is part of giving them optimism excitement happiness part of giving them lessons about god the god is the creator when you point out wonders of nature when you see the clouds and see such a wonderful view such beautiful clouds look at this beautiful blue sky look at this bright sun look at this beautiful tree point out to them and and and again even if you're not so excited about but but say it anyway it's raining say wow so good water is coming down from the sky like mana came down in times of our forefathers in the desert hashem is sending us water trees are going to be growing plants vegetables flowers are going to be growing thank you hashem for giving us water be excited when you see birds animals even insects then you are giving your children opportunity to be happy their entire life their eyes will be open and they will see nature and the world in an excited way so again i want to review what we learned today we learned that it's very difficult to change what your what your parents put into you physically and spiritually but we learned that it is possible however we don't want to give this challenge to our children we don't want to overburden them they're going to have their own challenges don't add your challenges to them whatever the parents don't fix the children will have to fix and therefore try to fix as much as possible in your life and save your children from extra challenges we learned that what children learn from home stays with them and has the greatest impression on them and therefore show your children your best behavior if you cannot be real be fake it's okay to be fake for good and when you fake enough it will become real and we spoke about the examples of behaviors that we should pay attention to show ourselves in the best light to our children who spoke about avoiding getting angry we spoke about not seeking honor spending wisely speaking about our trust in god being honest observing laws carefully speaking about our fear to not to get punished if we transgress be a giver be generous be involved in the in uh hazard projects invite guests and be happy about it be excited in your preparation for shabbat in your mitzvoth be committed to torah study say blessings out loud improve your prayer and find a rabbi for yourself and make sure you call him and speak to him in front of your children at this point if you would like to make comments ask questions you can unmute yourself and ask or you can ask in a chat and i wish that everyone should have inspiration from hashem to make right decisions to behave properly in all circumstances if you have questions you can call me or text me my number is 845-825-7906 if you need a link to this lecture you can request from me or from sarah b the number was posted on the chat thank you again may we see only happiness from our children and we can guarantee that we will see only happens from our children by showing them good example by training them while they are at home how to behave properly how to speak properly and how to think properly may we all see the fruits of our labor and enjoy long life with our children thank you for listening have a great night all the best you