#2: Behind the Bima

okay we are live we have a few participants here on Zoom watching us and let's just see where we are on Facebook is working here are stringing if he tagged us there we are we are on Facebook we're on zoom welcome back to week 2 of coffee talk I'm your host dry my hair from Goldberg we're joined tonight by by Philip Moscow etcetera by Joshua Brody and I have to say guys that among all of the classes among all the program is among all the things that we've been doing during this difficult crisis in time I received maybe the most feedback about when we weren't teaching but rather when we were just talking and being ourselves when we were letting our proverbial hair I think I'm in the lead on that one for now was not on our topics for tonight so I want to begin tonight with a quick tour I figured three rabbis are getting together we got to share just a quick thought I'll tell you a beautiful form of shore - Donna I Lila's dad this year all of us are asking why is tonight why is this year different than all years but every year Pesach we say why is tonight different than all other night alive I'm sure lucky for our libo says don't read it - Donna have Eliza why is tonight different he says Manish Donna on your day how lie Eliza what will be different because of tonight that we go into the Seder night looking for an experience of transformation that we want to change we want to grow that we want to evolve it should be a night that leaves us changed forever - Donna are you day a lie allows that so quick thought on the on the Haggadah so we're gonna begin as we did last week it's coffee talk Moskowitz actually I see there as promoting his a cup of coffee we've got some product placement this week so sponsored really I'll start this week and tell you what I'm drinking last week the next morning after we did coffee talk I woke up to a text by the owner Shula winery thanking me for featuring his wine it's a pleasure our friends at Schiele did a great job if anyone else would like to sponsor a bottle of anything about a product placement a beverage have us promote it we'd be it would be glad so I want to there's somebody who dropped off at my house this was about how much was left in it we'll finish it tonight of the 30 year old aged Laphroaig I happen to be a unified fan it pairs nicely with the incredible incredible smoked brisket that he dropped off also a huge thank you you know who you are if you're watching thank you so much before like if you're not familiar comes from the island of Isla it's a very smoky very PD scotch it's got a very woody flavor it kind of tastes like you swallowed a campfire I'm very excited because I'm gonna be drinking it in my be ers glass tonight so woman may Carla hi and but that's why anyway I want to thank my friend who dropped it off and this is not what I went through so far during coronavirus this was just for the record I thought i bottled two days ago and it was all for the record that guy and i have that little talk because i'm getting none of that 30 years stuff glasses it's very important you know a lot of the the kiddush club guys who think that they're experts the fine schmucker's to think they know what the drinking you know they'll put ice in their Scotch if you put ice in your Scotch you just read the world with amateur weight we go back to that word it's a real word by the way it's a clue to appropriate word and feel free to look it up but in any way you put ice in your numbing your scotch you've taken away everything it's not the way you drink a scotch and throwing a scotch back is nothing we drink a Scotch either supposed to add a little bit of water water opens up the flavor you're supposed to take off the edge roll it on your tongue take in the aroma swallow enjoy it even rack and we'll tell you that I just got that right so that's what I'm drinking tonight I look forward for my laugh I'm rabbi Brody what do you have for us tonight okay so first of all I got some classic Budweiser now this goes great talk about pairing this with anything it really goes great with anything you could have this with a bowl of cereal in the morning you could have this true dinner doesn't make it every fact for dinner tonight I made to impossible burgers one fret leotta and one for me and I said how come you're not taking your burger I swear this happened tonight except because there's one left on the table she said no I did I say one second you took your burger I'm already halfway through my burger I looked inside I had this huge slice of tomato you slice of it on your birthday and obviously we're out a few of those bug just buds for you baskets what do you got over there first of all the person just texted me apparently I had some of that thirty-year Laphroaig on Purim I just don't remember here too well but I have actually in honour of coffee talk I have a cup of coffee courtesy of cafe Joe who is my corporate sponsor for tonight so big shout out to Erin Schoenfeld and Josh Karsh from cafe Joe and I'm gonna make a little time on this cup of coffee and anyone is interested I will in all likelihood still be up at 3 or 4 in the morning as a result of this cup of coffee but but it's worth it anything from my dear friends at cafe Joe so if I am what I am to everyone but my mouth goes could you tell for the sake of our corporate sponsor to you where people might be able to get their own paths for the drawers of available yes I think if you go on Amazon they sell on Amazon I'm sure if you contact me afterwards I'm happy to put you in touch with them but cafe Joe is is top selling coffee in Israel and friends of our from the community are the distributors in the United States and it's phenomenal coffee delicious recently I've become quite the coffee snob and I'm I'm a big supporter of cafe jobs so we could fill your caffeine needs and also express your Zionism at the same time it's a really beautiful Zionism okay before our wives run an intervention on us and take us offline this is all in moderation responsibly obviously we recognize they're people who shouldn't be drinking if they're kids who are watching you know through everything responsibly in moderation so the hi I'm to those who we wish a speedy complete and painless or foolish llama to the world we wish a complete recovery and a gula and that we should only have the the best of everything so the high in my shame this funds for me for the record if you just heard the Broncos you can answer I'm a nun zoom or Facebook live that's for another time so I want to open up with our first topic for tonight and open up with our first topic for tonight and that is something that we were all really traumatized by last night I was several times today what are we gonna say we're gonna have a release and we gonna put on an email are we gonna talk about how we gonna react we were violated frankly we were violated through a vicious and heinous tap we don't know who the attackers were but we know they were evil and nefarious they were wicked people with wicked plans and we won't rest until we find them and bring them to justice but the truth is what was a very holy activity and a holy endeavor was rudely interrupted our annual hog got a night which we were doing over zum we had about a hundred seventy five hundred eighty people watching just on zoom and the other platforms as well and in the middle of about a third of the way through her blackness was concluding a beautiful DVAR Torah when has been happening to too many people the zoom bombing all of a sudden out of nowhere my kids were watching your kids were watching adults kids people of all ages and all of a sudden people started screaming they were screaming hail Hitler Hitler should have finished the job on your grandparents calling us slurs of Jewish stereotypes and and there were people disrobing there were young women taking off all of their clothing and it was really traumatic and we tried to disconnect right away and I just tell you the rest of the story and then I'll hand it off to my co-hosts there to share their reactions and how they felt throughout the day and how they've recovered from it but there was really something beautiful to the story which was that we disconnected the call and disappeared obviously and we started getting a flurry of texts from people that said hey are we resuming we're back and it's safe now and we thought it was over for the night but it turns out there were 50 60 70 people back on zoom' waiting for Derek Torah we got right back into it and in some ways it's the story of the triumph of light over dark of good over evil it's the Jewish story of our history of should behold Dharma Durham the Millennial Colosseum that in every generation they try to bring us down sometimes it's physically sometimes it's our enemies now it's it's on technology the zoom bombers are trying to bring us down with anti-semitic slurs but we triumph they tried to silence our Torah and we the beautiful hug got a night so that's that's what I tried to take off of them the spin from it but urban Moskowitz as the host of the Haggadah night how did you feel when it was happening you had the controls the reins you were the host of that zoom call you have to react quick Willie walk us through what was going through your mind well first thing they realize was going on I mean if you remember I think Robbie oculus was speaking and someone came on and said he's a hundred percent wrong or something like that and a more you know he's an idiot he's wrong my silence the [ __ ] so I was I was starting to panic and it took me a while to catch up to what was going on but some of the images caught me up pretty quickly the truth is I didn't I didn't really know what to do I want to give him a shout out to our colleague rabbi rail Blumenthal who really uh in his millennial self was able to figure out quickly how to stop that and get us back on but but you actually under you don't actually gave a low ball of the number we have 95 people that stayed on after we came back which is extraordinary in my minds actually mind-boggling and 95 people patiently waited for the last six seven speakers just because they wanted to learn about God and I couldn't agree with you more up I go over to me the story of the Haggadah night is that Torah always wins you had people that tried to break it up you have people that tried to defile it honestly and people that tried to ruin the tour it's not the first time in Jewish history probably won't be the last time and yet as Jewish history has shown over and over again Torah will always triumph and I have to say personally I was really touched because I was feeling pretty down about it last night I was a little humiliated by it and I got dozens and dozens of texts emails Facebook messages from people giving me fizeau telling me how much they enjoyed it telling me how despite what happened they still found it was worthwhile because of all the Torah that was learned so it's not only a statement about how Torah wins but it really is a statement about about less said about ways to do fast said ways to pick people up and about what community means and to me that's the best of what BRS stands for okay one of the most meaningful things will go to you in a second rabbi Brody but was that our sponsors of the evening so Donny and Mariam Oppenheimer who I think are with us tonight by the way feel free to offer your comments questions in the chat on the zoom or on Facebook live a little bit harder to follow for me there that's what I'm looking to the side when I do but they sponsored a memory Moon's mom a very special woman who was actually my wife's teacher and the mother of my dear friend Manoj Shapiro as well and rabbeted Shapiro and it meant so much to them that we came back and the night finished because to have a night you sponsor in memory of someone that you love your mother be so rudely interrupted and that's the way that it ends with so harsh and the fact that we were zoomed and we finished it and came back they mentioned a little it was to them and that that really touched me deeply Brody you know I saw your face when these images came on I saw what were you thinking how did you feel what how did you recover today well I'll just talk friend of mine and they said well didn't your IT department you know step in I said let me explain something about this we don't have any we're hanging out we don't have you know some of the bigger organizations obviously Federation's that these big IT departments and they have people monitoring and obviously that's not what we have but you know I think I'll be honest my initial in the a question I think it was like Moskowitz said that we just thought there was someone challenging something which which trouble yeah this was saying and then it started making me nervous because I'm thinking there's a good chance everyone in this call could probably challenge something I'm about to say so I was like I'm not even gonna speak on this call I'm gonna say hang up like this is a hostile crowd and when Larry Brody what do you thing about this theory rabbi yeah this I was my turn to go next and ya know you if you were to watch not that any of us would go back and watch but if one were to go back and watch the videotape you'd see that the Bombers came on while he said and now I want to introduce so my kids have a theory they think that the the bombers were targeting me personally I said there's no way they just saw Jewish group what do you think about that theory there was a person like a chance well you know what we're talking to ya I'm all in all right now to be in this little little group of Rabbis of some of the greatest these are the greatest rad - you'll find anywhere I was just talking to a from New Jersey goes to one of those big synagogue he says to me says listen what's going on there in Florida he says we know everyone up here in New York knows the biggest synagogue right now is called Bertone synagogue and there's no question this is what happens when you become such a big synagogue you become such a great great leader I'm talking about me I'm talking about my other colleagues on this line you're gonna become a target and I'm gonna say now in all seriousness because I was being serious but you're gonna say it wasn't but in all seriousness this is the real threat I'm telling you you got people out there that are real haters and you know I would hate to think that that we're not gonna be able to do programs like this because they've figured out how to how to beat us but there are people they see what we're doing we put out the biggest website right now any community has dozens of programs every single day on virtual take you to plug that legs talking about some serious haters out there these are people that unfortunately like to do a lot more than just yell and scream and you know dirty pictures up on our website let me ask a few question actually and I want to welcome the people who just joined us I think I think I'm come way she's watching did I see my hero my childhood hero is watching right now Kamaishi this is not this is not for uncle Moishe material but that what we're talking someone just texted me right now that was bearing but yeah anyway wanted welcome to people were just learning us for talking about the fact that last night be arrested on a got a night when we've done this in person we've had three four five hundred people online we were heading towards those numbers when we were rudely interrupted by anti-semites who bombed our zoom call can't happen tonight we're set up as a webinar we've got a totally different so we're good tonight we bomb happen I just want to see Brody's legs for motion but for most of us that was pretty traumatic too but so we're talking about the fact that last night in the middle of our Haggadah night all the sudden a group of anti-semites came on screaming Heil Hitler and calling us [ __ ] and that Hitler to finish the job on our grandparents and at the same time there were women stripping down to their birthday suit and it was really really traumatic so I want to ask you a question you know my kids were watching they're very traumatized they're still talking about it obviously you know we try to raise them with a a sense of modesty and a focus on modesty and and here they're exposed to quantity racial slurs at the Semitic attack and to nudity and I'm curious for the people you have heard from your own experience when you shared that in the moment and we all described that we were shaking what bothered you most what was it the fact that we were violated our space was it the fact that they were yelling anti-semitic was it the images of the nudity in a sacred space of Torah what was the thing if you had to rank it what caused you to be shaking what really bothered you the most moskowitz we'll start with you it's actually interesting first of all I got a few text messages from people saying father that I was more bothered by the language than I was about the images mmm the answer is yes we are desensitized and large from the parts to the images that we see but we and that's obviously a trigger for many of us um for me I knew my son was watching at home my twelve-year-old son at home and my mind immediately released oh gosh I hope my wife was there and turned the screen off very quickly but he got he got a little bit of an education last night and you know the truth is as you and I say all the time every challenge is an opportunity and it's an opportunity to speak to our children about anti-semitism it's enough they speak about hatred so opportunity about speak about the images dangers and the opportunities of the Internet so you know again when the mascots are you telling us that you ended up having of the talk last night because of this I had part of the talk I had part of it which part rest off but what's the commotion so we'll leave it there we're not getting too graphic on commish's on the line when I welcome him he's a childhood hero Hashem Hashem is there some his family everywhere even on our zoom calls we were able to recover and it was a beautiful thing so I'm free what do you think people are most traumatized by the profanity yeah three or the anti-semitic slurs what really bothers to are cool or and here's an interesting you know twisting I got an aunt here is the interesting twist for everyone to think about is does what bothered you most reflect a lot about you yeah maybe it does it's me psychoanalyze me right now and see the images the only image I saw was the again it depends I guess which screen you are on there about 200 people on last night they're about seven full screams I was on the first screen so I guess whoever was on the first week didn't see anything but there was an image that came up I guess when someone's speaking that person gets highlighted right so you get to see they take up the whole screen and there was a point I guess the only image I saw that then was startling was it looked like a skull and it looked like I don't remember what it looks like it looked like a very scary image for me I would say that it's a lot more scary to hear Heil Hitler you know yelled in a group that's that's a Jewish group by someone that's obviously you know saying it with anger and saying it because they we really feel like that they hate Jews I'll be honest never heard that I don't think that's a I don't heard someone walking to my class in my class or into a room saying yelling yelling Nazis you know we want to kill great some of it someone what else is a [ __ ] I never know one's a baby elf I could maybe four I felt like they were yelling it at me we posted two hundred people maybe in that room and I think for most probably it was our first real experience being yelled at those names I know you know you've done march of living many years in a row it's been canceled or and some will debate whether we really need to still have it and and when we see that this is still going on it I think that's what shook me to my core also is hearing those those anti-semitic slurs and and so so brazenly so openly who would say in 20 29 States of America and you know what the zoom platform really is our classroom right now so this is the equivalent of someone walking in in the middle of your home Machir in the middle of your Gomorrah sheer holika sheer somewhere walking in the middle of a program and yelling Heil Hitler and so on and so forth and you know I guess the technology only allowed us if there's any solace that no one thought that they were going to get shot in that moment it really is it almost felt like you were you don't know saying and like we was very vulnerable I'm sad the irony of this is is that in any other year all rabbis would be talking about anti-semitism Chava segundo that would have been the trigger topic for this earth everyone would have been speaking about it the net between anti-semitism in the Seder and because of the events the last month we almost forgot about anti-semitism we forgot what a significant issue it was in the beginning of the year for American Jewry and in last night kind of reminded me that while we've kind of pushed that to the side it's still very much there and very much on their minds but so that's a really interesting point is that this coronavirus has distracted all of us because even the anti-semites have to be distancing themselves and it was a harsh reminder that it's very much alive we spent enough time I don't to give them any more time they shouldn't give them that victory but thank you for the people who are posting all the articles and links to how we can try to set up our zoom or our technology going forward we're trying to our IT department which is right now is very much taking this iteration trying to implement this notation as our Shabbos ago glowed Russia will be over at YouTube live so we can hopefully avoid some of that disaster but we want to move on from the zoom bombing why don't we go a little bit more lighthearted coughing thank you my daughter it's pushing the coffee has replaced the Scotch bottle with the coffee mug the thank you stagehands so let's move over a little bit more lighthearted remember skits tell us in addition to your incredible leadership in and hosting or how got a night you also initiated the first ever BRS virtual talent show talk about the talent show what are some of the towns that have been coming in so far how is it set up maybe some of the people who are watching and we've got incredible we've got colleagues watching we've got the CEO of our Federation watching Brody's white guy got an incredible group and frankly I see that they're really from all over the world this is exciting I think we've kind of broken through we go way to go so Mach was we got really talented people on here now he's going rule by the way I know like some of these some of these shows if your professional then you're eligible like about the first to admit a video we were a very professional is it only for amateurs can professionals compete what's the rule tell us about the talent show so basically a couple maybe last week we were all sitting around everyone was very down I mean and he needed a pick-me-up we needed a couple apps together and we decided to put out this BR virtual talent show basically people can videotape themselves up to five minutes doing the talent a skill something silly something absurd send it in we're gonna take the top five videos that come in we're gonna send them out to the BRS membership to be voted on and the top two are going to receive gift cards to dip miss a kosher restaurant here in Boca Raton so far we have received those incredible videos someone today just sent me a video of himself singing a song which which was a phenomenal we have kids in the community who are doing shtick where they're you know bouncing balls down stairs right into a cup it's like incredible what's coming in and as my wife has texted me I'd like to give a shout out to her it was actually her idea the talent show well did she tell you to send them in with my idea now I'm gonna get a text saying why'd you tell them that I told you to do that but but I want to encourage everyone send stuff in we've got phenomenal videos we've got kids we've got adults we've got older people in the communities what's the rule can professionals can amateurs what how do you what's the rule you know we're making the rules right now so this is the team so I will take anything we'll take any video the second you're trying to be IT team I will be judging the contest I'm broglie is that a new talent of yours right about that you're trying it off here no let me tell you something I remember back almost 20 years ago rabbi Goldberg and I we went on a team mission to Israel doing I think it was and then why don't you remember this where we actually think we're looking for an activity to do with the teens and we did a talent and you want do you mind what I did it I did it I do it so tell me I don't have to go and get it now but it's a talent are you learned in my youth I would competed come you knows I participated competitively in it remember what it was so tell me how many you can do yes he'll everybody knew what it was juggle no how many spoons do you think I can hang from my face at one time it's amazing the average person maybe two or three would be impressive one one on the nose that's what I would say I one on the nose I think it's like he's like eight wait hey hey you know what I think you just gave me my idea for my video my impersonation a bunny thing no anyway maybe I'll do maybe I'll do the tell us about the piano what's going on with piano over there oh it's great the last week where's the talent show even that org slash what's a talent town show one of those I don't remember I'll get a few needs to know that when we resume our coffee talk we're gonna actually be bringing a musical guest going forward you got some lined up incredible musical guests we're gonna interview them maybe they'll sing a song and with musical ghosts George broody we're gonna bring in a musical guest those who know what that's talking yes online or slash talent show that's gonna be meteor videos I want to move over to the next serious subject we're trying to go back and forth here between a little bit more light because all of us need a little bit of a break look I am what I am and and some of the heavy so let's go a little bit more heavier topic and we're treading on thin ice here I'm a little bit concerned nervous to do it but I think it's an important conversation you had and that is who has it harder right now teachers more my parents now the reason I bring this up is because as rabbis we can sometimes get sandwiched in between we're on the one end we're hearing from parents who say and nobody shoot the messenger right now I'm just relaying some things that I've heard and to open it up to a discussion and to hear what you have to say again you can feel free to share your opinion the chat either in the zoom we're going to Facebook log wherever you like but we're hearing from some parents you say look you know the teachers deserve to be appreciated their extraordinary they're underpaid underappreciated general teachers are amazing we love them we appreciate them but you know teachers are very blessed right now that for the most part they're still getting their salaries and even with all the effort this is the parents perspective I'm not saying it's accurate that teachers because they're putting up a couple zooms a day or putting together a few videos the day it really represents a fraction of their normal teaching time so maybe teachers who are about to go on a two-week Pesach vacation and they're teaching only part of the time so on the one hand parents feel you know I want to get appreciated I'm also doing half the job but I want to tell you there's another perspective that's what I want to bring this up tonight because there's the teachers perspective I want you to know I was sitting today my kids rotate I sit with different each day and listen to them and try to help supervise with their work and you know you get to you get to do something you don't get normally do which is you get to observe your your kids teachers when do you ever do that could you imagine you show up at school and you're like yeah I'm just gonna sit in the back of the classroom I'd like to observe you teach my kid no one can ever do that and here we are having the opportunity to do that and I want you to know something when I was watching these teachers who have to adapt who perhaps spent an entire career but not but not doing it on technology platforms or who have to manage a classroom where they're not in the same room and keep everyone's attention and try to discipline teachers are doing an extraordinary job while their own kids have to get their education and while they're fearful about how they're going to pay their bills and while there's so much out going on teachers truly are our heroes but ever appreciated they're having to adapt they're having to manage and there's an extraordinary amount that's going on so I don't know like I said it's dangerous to bring up the subject I just think that like with many other things it's important for each side to to hear the other side and to think about the perspective of the other side until realize that you know everyone's just hurting everyone's just scared everyone just worried and maybe they don't know how to communicate that so I guess I raised it to just make a call to say hey parents maybe you feel you're underappreciated or you're partnering with the teacher or you know you're you're unemployed at the moment and you're worried they'll take that out on the teacher the appreciative show gratitude talk respectfully talk how you could partner and teachers you know realize that when a parent maybe talks that way they're concerned they're going through their own stuff they're worried they're angry so I guess it's just a call for everybody to see it from the other side and if they see things in context and perspective and to realize we're partners in this so anything you haven't shared on that dangerous topic that you both part of the show which feels going to say something which is that I'm gonna have to nice boardwalk back so Phil going I know that was last week obviously I agree I'm I've enormous respect for the teachers I mean wrapping over you and I we say all the time we teach for a living and yet we find teaching on Zoo to be infinitely more challenging then teaching in person it's more draining we find ourselves more exhausted at the end of the experience so I get it I get both sides I get that parents are anxious parents are feeling me uncertainty parents are managing job or job loss the children at home helping keep the children occupied and teachers in many respects are being forced to turn over their entire platform everything they've done some of these have done it for 15 20 years all of a sudden overnight into technology the only perspective I'll add is a perspective that was shared to me by a teacher and it touches upon what you said rabbi Goldberg teacher said for me to go on zoom' now and to teach my students knowing that the parents are observing my classes as I'm doing it is literally like baring my soul in front of parents literally like opening up myself and saying Here I am as a professional judge me in for pitting for teachers that's really putting themselves out there and many especially in the younger grades are not as used to that and many of them feel very violated when parents respond in turn and with with the vitriol and really inappropriate feedback so that's where I I agree with you all wholeheartedly each side needs to appreciate what the other side is feeling and I think you touched upon the key word for me and that's partnership it's not one or the other no one's working harder everyone's really in this together to make sure that we're providing an education for our children that we're providing them with a certain sense of stability in these crazy and uncertain times and the more we focus on that word partnership I really believe that the most important person in this equation which is our children are gonna succeed you made that great point about the vulnerability and maybe I maybe we have an idea that the the teachers should get to tap into the camera in the home for when they're not teaching so that they can judge the parents and how their parenting and then it will all be equal that's not a real suggestion it's an attempt that's a humor as I'm already regretting bringing up the topic but I don't regret it because the truth is we're not trying to fan the flames of a controversy we're actually trying to do the opposite which is you know as urban mosque let's just say we're really just calling it everybody other perspectives to appreciate where they're coming from and that this is the time where the temperatures up for everybody and to to realize that were long together it's a partnership a lot of people are leaving the comfort zone doing things they're not used to doing both on the teacher side and the parent side so if we can if we can be show some empathy and and to see it from the other side we can all we can all do better so we have amazing teachers our teachers are outstanding and are incredible they didn't have time it's not like they spent a whole year going to seminars and having planning meetings that when the virus strikes in five years what will we do this whole thing happened overnight and yet look how school was transformed and people weren't necessarily tech savvy or people who are shy by nature and they're okay teaching a group of young students now have all these parents in the room with them they've really adapted and modified really quickly our schools are doing the best that teachers are doing our best and by the way parents are doing our best when they when they lash out or when they react maybe it's not lashing out I think there is a parent perspective here too they're doing their best a lot of people are really scared they're really hurting and all of us when we realize that we're all in it together we can do better Brody's here it's really say something what do you want to share yeah I just think that it's very complicated obviously have different spirits that have different opinions I know that there's some that I'm thinking wow this is working out so great save a lot of money in tuition I could do home school next year and I know they don't [ __ ] Simone's mom was like I'll paint double weekend this isn't that for us I think anyone who ever contemplated maybe we could homeschool now it's over in one week and then even this morning I saw eight on was on school you know he's only five he said that gets the ec4 program at hello and I hear him fighting with the Hoover so I go in as I knew in this room like he makes his his class and then I realized they've been fighting for 10 minutes the mute is off there's no mute so I mean poor Cindy Hofstede he's trying to just class my kids we're arguing for 10 minutes this is going on where were the parents okay I was on I was talking to Matt I was Matt can you confirm whether you had a conversation with Brody today at all where's the river Samoan that's the question about this and I think I think it really needs to be made I do believe that there are ways to to give feedback that are appropriate and they're they're inappropriate what needs to get feedback and I think it's important for parents to realize that even if they're frustrated and even if they're anxious and even if they're uncertain they have to maintain that standard of Sderot ferrets when they give the feedback to the school not to go on social media and in an inappropriate fashion call out teachers make them feel more exposed but there are appropriate channels to do so and again I just think that point needs to be made the schools want to do good the schools want to move they know it's not a finished product but to go on and to take in appropriate formats to launch this again I really call it like a vitriol what some parents are doing I think that isn't appropriate as well I'm with you it actually brings us to a bigger and broader topic maybe we can transition it was related but I do want to give a shout out because I was sitting next to my son shy when he was in class with the amazing mrs. Brown and she said to him not knowing I was sitting next to him shy tell you Alba I'm really excited for coffee and talk tonight so I said I'm gonna give her a shout out to mrs. Brown thank you for all your hard work and everything you're doing we really appreciate it so you know you brought up a good topic was not related directly to the parent-teacher issue but people using social media to share their opinions about things that are really affecting real people in real lives so you know Rabbi Moskowitz had an amazing had an amazing inspirational words on the oh you call the other day he led the tehilim with the inspirational five minutes and I wanted to be clear for the record he and I had a bet beforehand I told him he was gonna have more people on his call and better feedback he told me he was gonna have I think his the answer was 1/5 of the people and and we went price of right prices right rules on this and and enough tell you Herman if you're listening you're watching you can put in the chat and confirms true by Moskowitz had not only more people on his than I did but he had more positive feedback more donations came into the yo you for him it's interesting I went to the owe you forever Moskowitz we should definitely get a cut of that at BRS and our Tomica Shabbos needs but anyway now they are used great to us they do great stuff for us so on that corner by Moskowitz told the story about a problem yet with JetBlue so he he found online the JetBlue CEOs email and was able to get in touch with him and ask him for help and and the CEO appointed someone who responded to him and never underestimate the Jewish people's ability to try to recover money when we feel that it was inappropriately taken from us rabbi Moskowitz was able to find that and get that back so it's interesting there are mascots you found the email and contacted him you didn't do what many other people do today which is you didn't take the social media to say nobody fly JetBlue it's the worst ia they can you believe what they did to me and that's what many people do to try to get attention but I raised that to say that you know it's one thing if you do that to JetBlue and JetBlue is also made up of shareholders and their employees and it's gonna impact people when you do that but it's one thing when you did it with a corporation but it always shocks me when people will go on social media and talk about a local restaurant they'll talk about the school the shul the rabbi's the educators they'll talk about local people that they interact with real lives real part NASA real reputation real feelings they've got to be better ways for us to communicate more directly more productively more respectfully than by taking to these platforms which really hurt people negatively so every time and I was wondering no someone had a negative never in Bocca because our kosher restaurants are all amazing and people should continue to order takeout from them and buy cards for them that you're gonna give to other people but if you had a negative experience the waiter took a while to get to you or the food wasn't cooked the way you want it maybe maybe the waiter had a bad night maybe the cook had a bad night you never have a bad day in your business so when you take to social media and you rank on them or tell everyone not to what are you trying to do hurt a community deprive it of another kosher restaurant what's the endgame with that did it make you feel better but is that how we measure things so anyway what do you guys think about that Moscow sauce about your JetBlue story did you think about going on online and ranking all over JetBlue I did I was I was enormous ly frustrated JetBlue completely mistreated my family I was really upset about it and and as I said on the call but the most frustrating part of this I'm a mosaic member here be careful okay that's why I have to tag along with you but but but the most frustrating part to me was that I couldn't get anyone to take me seriously like I really felt if there was someone to just listen to me then I completed my case and and they would give me what I what I felt that was rightfully coming to me so I did think about going on Facebook and rocketing something about JetBlue in getting their attention that way and then I realized it's no different than one of my children that when they want attention they kick and they scream in the yell and they throw hissy fit because they know that's how they're gonna get my attention and I really out of a whim I said you know what I'm just gonna email the CEO and it's gonna be one of those stories either he ignores it or someone gets back to me I googled I wrote a very respectful letter we have hope in what we wrote the email did you already have like the dresser you were gonna give out of this in my mind no no because I didn't know how it end I didn't know how it end but uh and it was it was we were actually at AIPAC it was it was like midnight after AIPAC and I was I wasn't even in Boca at the time and I wrote I wrote a very respectful letter and my whole argument to the CEO of JetBlue was part of the reason why I love JetBlue is their customer service and that's why I couldn't understand why they they would treat someone that way ruin so many years of goodwill over a nominal thing and I to be honest I was so surprised they call about the next any nicer it was this lovely lady who works in the corporate office there she's worked there for 17 years and she told me that the reason why she loves working there is because she gets to fix problems she said she loves making phone calls like this in helping people out with issues and that's how you keep clients that's how you keep people coming back that's a beautiful thing I just want to give a shout out because I saw he's watching I hope he's still watching but my colleague my dear friend rabbi kurakin who's the president of the RCA right now he's doing our standing job the RCA and really meeting the needs of this crisis but I want to also wish him a Mazel Tov his son got married last weekend and wasn't planning on talking about this but I see he's watching I hope he's still watching maybe he'll be a guest in the future coffee talk get the inside scoop at the RSA rabbinical council of America his son got married in California Rebecca wrapkin is a prominent rabbi of the the buy it in Toronto Toronto and Rebecca Rankin was not at his son's wedding he watched on zoom his son's wedding because that's what leadership is it's modeling for others and and if we're distancing and you're not able to travel and that's what it takes and and that's real that's real that's a real sacrifice a real loss in fact I hope I won't embarrass him or violate confidence with him but I was on a little chat with a few rabbi friends and I guess everyone was talking about what's going on or complaining about something any road stop complaining in 15 minutes I'm about to attend my son's wedding online and it put a lot in perspective again I hope please forgive me if I just made weddings in the last year could you guys have done that yes it's a good question first of all I could definitely do that was save it I'm trying to convince the rest of my children to get married in the next 30 days since that's the stay home order through the end of April so I got six daughters one of them's married I'm looking for she do come for the next five if you have suggestions trying to get them all married in the next 30 days the rest of them youngest is 10 but is that legal in this country I don't even know what will go for it so could we've done that I don't know Brodie could could we have done that it's a good question it's a good question but I don't know I would say late I want to wish that Mazel Tov throw the kurakin I don't know it's a good question to delay it this is a good transition to our next topic because you know the goal of a wedding it's possible my son was sitting six feet to my left by the way while we're doing this right now I love him Mikey and I love my son my son what is my son I love him the goal of a wedding is to be married right you don't get married so you can have a wedding there are some immature people who they just they're in a rush to get married because they've always dreamt about their wedding and that usually doesn't end well instead you get you have the wedding because the goal is to get married that's the whole that's the whole goal I remember I was visiting somebody very special to us who was who was unfortunately on her on her last legs and our few last days and I was sitting with her daughter talking and she told me the daughter told me a story that on her wedding day they it's an enormous amount of time making sure they had the right flowers the right decor and the the flower truck pulled up and I guess she was getting her makeup or hair done in her mom came in and her mom said to her like really braced herself and I've terrible news me very upset and what is it she said you know the whole flower arrangement the theme that we chose they messed it up they have a different the truck is here it's all it's all wrong so she's thought for a moment it's an amazing woman in our community and she looked at her mom and she said mom in three days the flowers will be dead no matter which ones they were and I'll be happily married I that and three days the flowers will be dead and I'll be happily married it was such a great perspective so I think about at that are my crop goons how it was my son's heroism and I guess I'll be crop can put his sons happiness that the whole purpose of the wedding is to be married don't delay that be married start your buddies lemon bistro we're gonna defeat this virus and is pandemic by letting it not stop us or slow us down but continue to live life and build life and he was willing to sacrifice his own being there in order to do that and I think that's really something which is outstanding what do you think wrote me just made a wedding what do you think I would say just figure out just delay in a couple weeks you know rock-and-roll right after this virus is over I think you listen that the kids wanted it wanted to do it I wouldn't say no but I would imagine that people want to celebrate together it's not like a Ritz but it has to be done at a certain time you know like son now or never it's now we're in a few weeks let's do it in a few weeks but what about the argument that you do the private cookbook cuz the goal all the weddings to be married and when this all passes you can have the biggest the most amazing party of all time so you that's an opinion masculine Bar Mitzvah soon wears what mascots can move that cup because it looks like it's superimposed looks like an image which isn't real lift the cup for a second oh that's real look at that there's nothing in there right I'm gonna be shaking at for no it's a cup of coffee and on the beach it's empty but guys obviously we're all talking here but if push comes to shove these are the situations that my heart mom I mean my heart bleeds for so many people but but those who rabbit Crompton's of the world people who have to sit Shiva and zoom and can't be with family I can't even having been through that I can't even fathom what it would be like not to have that support system not so much of our religion is predicated on community you know we feel it when it comes to feel abit Seaboard oppening Shabbos but weddings funerals bris is so much of this his community in we take for granted how much our community our friends our support system enhances those experiences and gives us comfort so again I know you guys had your your you know cookie cutter answers but the honest truth is oh I can't even I can't even fathom I literally can't even fathom making a wedding without being there with my children having a Shiva where I can't be with siblings and family and have people come and comfort me be having a bris and not having people to celebrate along set to me that it's it's one of the great tragedies of what's going on yeah I think we're grieving a lot of loss actually gonna talk about that on Saturday night in the midst of Shabbos it's Travis ago the drush ah about the sense of grief that we're all feeling even the people who thank God are amazingly blessed to not directly be affected by this or also to say grieving from things that are different innocence which was lost these occasions which can't be fully honored or celebrated or marked or mourned and there's that element I think in all these ways which is it's the tragedy you know behind the tragedy of this thing which is really really sad which is really sad so it'll be interesting to hear that perspective of the people going through it and the difference is teeth so white bro do we got a question if you looking at a question in an answer there how does rabbi bro to keep his teeth so white are they stone say are they saying that you don't just compared to you guys what are they saying that scale of what those veneers is that what their coat or surreal the real everything's real this is real marae right here have natural gray rabbity goldberg yeah and i'll ask you last week was about some of the significant illogic shila's that have been asked and certain precedent and halakhah that's emerging from this entire you know tragic episode so last week we discussed zoom satyrs and i'm sokka that come out from that someone just texted me recently you predecessor our rabbi emeritus rabbi Kenna Brander was featured in a Times of Israel article as saying that breaking up on me a little bit as saying that cremation in instances of coronavirus where there's a risk of it being spread is not not just permissible but is actually a mitzvah that was the headline of the article and that's what was being forwarded around rabbi Brander I know subsequently walked his statements back in a comment to the RCA but I'm curious you know as as as the current leader of okra tones how can I know it's on many people's minds what do you feel about this what do you feel about these types of ha logic leniency is that were relying on in this time period taking into account the historical context of Jews and disease and plague that we discussed last week versus our fidelity Thalassa yeah well the first thing I think is that you're gonna be looking for a new job when this is over the second thing you think about I want you to be careful helping care I'll tell you the truth nobody branders not only my predecessors my close friends I have a lot of respect I learned during Norma's amount from him and he gave me a block of use in my life and for that I'll forever be appreciative I think this is a classic case of some journalistic sensationalism I think that they're both I think my brain is a very devoted to Locke and he understands that cremation is just something that's beyond the scope and it's beyond us and a great tragedy about tonnage the fastest-growing option of a varial or end-of-life decisions in Florida and there's amazing efforts happening to fight cremation maybe in the future will have everybody zone or a beige a liens on will talk about what they're doing in Florida to fight cremation it's a brilliant and innovative so read Brenner knows that and believes that he didn't mean mitzvah in the context that he would of course god forbid support cremation the journal was posed it to him in the sense that if it would save a life in other words it would contain the virus and that were the only option and what Ruby Brenner was saying was it's a mitzvah to do whatever you need to do to save a life and the journalist sensationalized it to create a controversy that's not even there to begin with I give him the benefit of the doubt on that I know that he believes that knows that he's doing great things these are stressful times so I think we probably all agree on that which is that cremation should not be an option cremation is just out of the realm talk about right now though it's it's a big topic I can't tell you how many times I've been called by somebody who says I have a relative want to be cremated I need [ __ ] out of it what should I say that's a difficult tough topic maybe I don't meet rabbi can you walk us through what you say so nobody knows that I didn't were on the same page about that I think we're also on the same page that we got to fight his virus and do it's necessary peacock nephesh saving a life supersedes everything else so it was journalists journalistic sensationalism trying to make a story where there is none but thank you for the rabbi how do you how do you how do you counter that right you're putting sokoloff out there Sokolov as we discussed last week as nuanced by definition but once it's out there it kind of takes on a life its own as we saw by the Xoom case as we saw by the case of cremation so walk us through you get a call from journalists you get a call from the local TV saying we want a commentary from an Orthodox Jewish perspective on you know X Y or Z so what goes through your mind in terms of answering that question what are your concerns and how do you prevent your words from being misconstrued so here's one of those areas where I grew a lot in the rabbinate when I first started I was excited any opportunity you know what they say in that like no publicity is bad publicity as long as they spell your name right I know Brody still believes that like his heroes who preserve his job I want right now but but as you know there's no bad publicity as long as you spell my name right so when I was first a rabbi you know it's exciting a reporter contacts you a journalist wants your opinion about something super exciting so first of all I think you have to be really judicious and smart that who you weigh in on who you take a pass so you say no comment who you even don't get back to because no comment becomes a comment and a story so there is an art and a skill to learning that but I'll tell you the biggest move in the difference that I do now is whenever someone contacts me a story about a hurricane anti-semitism high holiday sermon thoughts coronavirus I say we just do me a favor could you email me your questions and I'm happy to send you back answers and when I do that I know that that way they're taking my words the way I wrote them and I say to them that they only have permission to quote exactly from what I wrote to them and answering their questions because when you do an interview on a phone out of these journalists it's amazing they sit with a pen and paper and you give this really like we're speaking really quickly right now they're like scribble three things and then the quote that they produce so little resemblance to what you tried to say so it's not even efficient or effective so I always say I'm happy to thank you I'm honored thank you for including me in your story it would be much easier for me if you send me your questions I'm more than happy to write you a few answers as long as you agree to quote directly from those answers and that way to us again they could always quote part of it and out of context but at least we've been degree of an elements of control over the answer you're given the best part is when the reporter asks you on the phone can you repeat what you just said I'm like no I can't like I was on a roll don't you have that little tape recorder that they always have on this corner so yeah it's a good question though about the journalists that question was a question was good gentlemen what else is on your mind tonight I'll tell you another thought on my mind we're having a debate right now that I'm not sure if we're gonna get into another coffee talk before Pesach so Rabbi Moskowitz and I have another date really interesting the question of whether we should host a zoo music or service and Carl annoyed pizza and there's two sides to this on the one hand and and of the three panelists on here I'm deeply appreciative to Hashem that I'm the only one of the three of us who was not how did this experience does not say you skir for an immediate loved one so I actually see that my opinion is the least authoritative or significant I [Music] significance but on the one hand there's power to saying yes go with a group to being with an assembly of people who have all experienced loss to have a house and leave the Isco and then fill in your own your own liturgy for your own loss on the other hand I've had a concern throughout this entire episode which is how do we unwind some of this when this is over so what happens next year when please god this is behind us and someone says you know a rabbi instead of doing his grandchildren you do he's gonna follow Morrie there's so many people have trouble getting to shoulder when we can't get the show on time or it's hard to live care whatever the case is and then we say no you can't do it online they said what what do you mean you did it last year online so I think we have to have a certain sense of mindfulness about the things we're doing now can we unwind them later when things are going to be different so and I don't have an answer we're actually debating this and considering it right now there's I think merits to both this argument but what it both of you have to say yes maybe I'll jump in give Robbie Brodie a chance to tap into his emotions but thirty mark once honor once a look at your text yeah Apple to share this I think I think that that many people who have never said before don't understand fully the emotional connection that people have with the recitation of yester I agree a hundred percent the community side of it is enormous and you know we've debated this in the past before I think it's it's completely the wrong thing to do that people walk out of show clock asker a given class about that obviously I defer to the mimic of the show but I think it's so counterintuitive to everything that we believe in that as a person is in their most vulnerable stage they're thinking about a loved one they're feeling those emotions and then they basically say sorry my parents are alive better luck next time I'll see in a couple minutes and as someone who stays into the room certainly someone who started out very young staying in the room it's a horrible feeling I happen to not like us cry don't connect to it but I do connect to the feeling of everyone walking out and making me feel like I'm alone standing there so I think you're in you know your shoes where the people stay yes there are shows where people stay um not many but there are definitely shows where people stay and it's based on that first of all the sources give a little bit of leeway to that and also it's based on that notion that here you have this this communal setting where you're asking people to grieve in to mourn and even if we know that wasn't the source of you skir that's essentially what's become and it's a really easy feeling to watch half the room reporters of the room walk out on you it's it's a very very lonely feeling and to me again I'm just sharing on it's the most traumatic part Iskar it is watching everyone leave so I think that anything that we could do I agree Kabbalah Shabbos Hal's I get the whole slippery slope concept and I get it by you scroll so I just think that for years for there's such an emotional component to it that to not allow people to tap into that is really hard again now that could be our fault that we set you screw up to be this thing that that really shouldn't be but that's what it is now and and I think to not I think we have to think really hard about ways to give people that opportunity to tap into your skirt to tap into that connection with their loved ones to do something on behalf of their loved ones and that's why you and I have been debating it because I feel I feel very very torn about it I feel very private I don't think we're debating even between the two of us we're both debating the merits of birth no a hundred percent yes yes correct not me versus you together we are debating the the pluses and minuses of doing and I feel very conflicted internally as well Rodya is somebody who's been saying yes go from relatively young age also I'll tell you you know you're so good to me was always this mystery I remember growing up in Elizabeth and we used to walk outside my tights told everyone yeah leave and I always wondered what everyone was doing and as as major service going on we're standing outside and then when I remember my first years occurred and even subsequent use occurs up until right now cuz you're not there fellows there but he's on the other side and I always wonder her the whole service there's really nothing that the service is I don't even know with the services I can't look over you and see what you're saying you're not saying but essentially you're saying with it like a kill male you saying one other small paragraph you know use your paragraph and I'm thinking I didn't want to walk out for two paragraphs I mean the whole thing can literally take you one minute and I don't know what everyone else is saying so it's a strange service you're supposed to feel like this whole emotional thing I don't really mean you know me I'm a I have my own issues with my own emotions lack of lack of hours I maybe I'm the wrong guy to ask about this photo but it doesn't I'm sort of mystified where everyone's walking out I thought who's gonna be this very emotional you've gone through this whole thing about people that passed away it's very quick I think most people are saying it and I'm done and then it's like they're waiting for the people to come back in yeah I'll do the sad i I'm usually not up on the FEMA with you cuz there a Mike Goldberg usually leave and I'm up I'm not usually with her buddy go Robbie Brody I'm usually up I'm edema and if you stand next to Martin Judah bits when he says he the skirt it's a very different experience I'll just share with you anyway cuz you've had dozens of people and family they were murdered you know what I mean it's like it I'm saying well in our audience more injure divots is an amazing Holocaust survivor who was beloved by our whole community and for years he's been leading what we do I won't say it's a happy compromise between the two because clearly it's not meeting that need but as opposed to the starcade sees could everybody leave what we say is we're starting your everybody stay we're gonna say the kill Molly for the martyrs the Holocaust the kill Molly for those who give their lives to the family a State of Israel I'm supporting the State of Israel and we say kill Molly for the members of our community we've lost and only then do we pause for those who want to take leave and when they take leave we've entered and we leave outside actually the text of a Fela to say for living relatives so that that time is not squandered and I know gossip but it's used praying for the people who are still alive so even there is a moment or part of your score where everyone is still in and that's the part that Martin Judah boots and please God for many many many many years will continue to so emotionally lead us in the kill Molly for the martyrs of the of the Holocaust the reason this discussion is interesting is because you know the many people watching on Facebook live on zoom' I'm sure have opinions on this but I hope you also get a little insight which is to why we started this coffee talk how we make these decisions those less you think you got an email that either announced we're gonna have a virtual disc or we're not that wasn't a win that wasn't someone texting saying hey should we include it or not we sit and we agonized and we deliberate and we weigh the merits of both sides and this is what communal leadership is about trying to figure out what's right and recognizing the the two sides to the issue and try to come out what you think is the best and hopefully this gives you a little bit of an insight into some of the thinking and debating and about deliberating that goes on behind it hundred percent I'll just respond there's there's a comment in the gym they use screws floats to remind you of your loss when everyone leaves it emphasized that you were more alone than you were before the you lost the person I never viewed it that way um again maybe that's maybe that's correct I'm not sure where that's from but but let's remind yes Kurt is still during yontiff your insurer with everyone else uh we've made it a very somber thing but I think specifically on yontiff it's that community component which is why we do it and so again to me it's just it almost pour is solved on a wound it adds insult injury when you literally have everyone when you have everyone walking out and so I never viewed it that way I never viewed his caress most specifically I'm supposed to feel lonely I've use Korres we're all in this together and in fact I gave a sheer about this on juist last year I'm very passionate about it and a few of my friends who are out the shear actually stayed in Frisco Angeles to be with me and I I cried more that you skir than I ever had before specifically because my friends chose to stay in and to show me that comfort and to give me that emotional support to lean on so again I think there are obviously two very different sides to the story and and you could play out both in your mind but for those who don't stand for your skir for those who have the privilege of going out I'm just trying to share a different perspective on what it's like to stay in what a person staying in craves and what they look for from the community and I think even if you go out there are ways to go out and there ways to go out there are ways to go out respectfully there are ways to go out where you communicate to those who stay in that I'm that I feel your pain that I I'm with you even though I'm going out and there are ways to go out that are slightly more disrespectful when I was a younger rabbi I'm still young but when I was younger I used to announce you know those who are blessed are fortunate to be able to go out four years ago we're gonna pause now and someone came to me and they said you know rabbi when you say that it really stings it really hurts those who are fortunate and blessed to go out is that the rest of us who are in here are cursed and unfortunate and I don't know I was trying to actually give some perspectives to say that if you're going out don't take that for granted but I heard that person and and since then I've tried to adjust the language because language is really really important and how we're communicating feelings thoughts we're gonna talk about that Multi Shabbos that I plugged the shoppers ago the drush enough nine o'clock youTube Live and and several other platforms but we're gonna talk about in terms of optimism the language we're using as we go through this episode even there with us card I learned that that language is really important how you announce that are there any rituals you think I mean let's say we are still going out we're giving a hug to somebody who's staying in would giving them an arm so if you want to touch anybody ever again but assuming that we'll ever be allowed to ever touch anyone ever again was giving like a little arm speed or a little hug a little tap on the back would be a little is that meaningful does it feel like empty gesture is it compound the pain is there anything what would you tell people who do leap for your skirt what could they do differently to try to be comforting to the people who are staying do you want to give a shot at that or cease frozen I'm still trying to figure out what music you're supposed to do right I get it when you say you know you seem psychotic every day for a year [Music] you're thinking about them and you're trying to elevate their neshama of the course of the year but it's it's like I stick to what so I'm the Charlotte for golem or whatever you're gonna say you skirt to remember them you remember them every day so what are you doing now saying it I don't even understand what does it mean you don't remember them today yeah yeah well it's a good question let's just not get into it right now that a lot talk about it what you think is even the word yester we're invoking Hashem and telling him to remember as if God can forget the word here's course use the opening puzzle begins whiskers invoking God to remember I didn't forget but let's say when I were out doing like a tutorial you're asking very important question and the forms of this conversation but again I think this is one of the themes that we have for tonight which is that the two sides to stories and it's really important to hear both sides to see both perspectives and to realize that there are different angles and one is not necessarily more right more wrong more authoritative often they're coming from the person's personal experience and we've talked about in a few different ways right now that people project their own personal experience which often includes their projecting their own worry their own fear they don't hurt their own and so on so the people who walk out they're not trying to hurt somebody's experience a loss they know what that's like and the person who experienced the loss you know they just want the companionship and the support they're not trying to be you know wishing ina on anybody when they ask them to stay and there are legitimate views and you know again it comes down to us as communal leaders and people in communal leadership positions everywhere having to make really really really tough decisions it's really easy I remember you know when I was younger and even right now all of us do it to the head of school to the to the head of the institution the organization heck everybody does it to die just a heck everybody does it to the mayor to the governor to the president when you're not in that seat making those decisions it's so easy to know what to do it's so I deal with that all the time before I was in the seat making the decisions I had a hair and it wasn't gray I look like a young stud and then you get in that seat and you got to make these decisions from the comfort of your armchair it's so easy to always know what to do it's so easy to know whether it's having a having a virtual yeast occur to when you should shut down the country to when you should attack Iran to when you should this to when you should it's so easy to you know tell the head of school the rabbi the the governor the president what to do when you're in that seat these are tough decisions and there's merit to both sides and you're trying to think it through and hear both sides of the argument think and consult with experts and get guidance and and be moderate some are bits one of the more advice you have the more wisdom you come to and it's not not always easy not always easy Brody are you finding that in the Federation world are you are people second-guessing or asking or what's the word on the street what's going on we're in the Federation World Federation is taking a great leadership role right now this crisis I don't know another organization that could do it better than the Federation and you know the community looks to our Federation for guidance and thank god we've got great leadership they make very informed decisions you have a very active Board of Directors some of our good friends are part of that board and that decision decision-making process and I think it's a great example of where you working together with together yeah we always need to end on a light note we've had some serious conversations we have some lighter conversations we really tried to tackle some issues and and you know even we are gonna be criticized on if you're getting texts from teachers and educators and which would wake up the board soon but we're no we're actually just listen I'm already not welcome in New York so just trying to earn more friends here to reiterate we're really just trying to say there's different perspective different sides everybody should feel empathy and love see it from the other side and and get along a partner in this time of challenging crisis it's a time to come together not to be a part it's a time to really be on the same page we got another question that came in from our friend wrote them here I just maybe this is asking dressed it was not any chance that I would make a rule that we only celebrate one day a young have given the circumstance this year wouldn't that be amazing mom did she ask you that one group had a suggestion maybe we should add another Aadhaar and push off or too late we're already into Nissan now so it's too late for that we couldn't make the other some are saying hey one year I've had a bunch of people telling me isn't it okay to kit Neos this year basically everybody's getting in whatever their pet peeve is about Judaism hey can we do away with coalition because of coronavirus like whatever your pet peeve is with with Judaism the thing that you think doesn't make sense to you you're like coronavirus can I meet whoever it is that I've been told I can't do that I want to do mix dancing whatever I want to be doing I can do it's coronavirus so what do you say I'm a Moskowitz can we do one day yeah no no but I get more questions about kid Neos and about swimming a lot of swimming on young tif questions a lot of people are really nervous 3d on TIFF how you can occupy your kids getting really hot here in Florida so I don't know you here let me ask you this one with that and now three Shabbos is with our family what are some suggestions for people how to how to fill those long Chaves afternoons we're gonna have three young tip days coming up it's gonna be a lot of family time together what are some suggestions from suggestions well tell us before we get to the suggestions I want to take a moment to say and we spoke about it last week we came up with solution that we shared since last week I don't wanna call it a solution that's that's I'm feeling exaggeration but we came up with a strategy but I do want to say that you know if we think if you think if you're living in the home even with one other person and you think shabbos are you on to this long I want you to talk about a person who lives alone and what not only Shabbos and on to what every day is for them and our heart goes out to we're thinking about it in our thoughts and our prayers and we're constantly trying to figure out what we can do to help people who live alone I mean that's one of the casualties of coronavirus is loneliness it's loneliness even when you're in a house or room full of people and it's loneliness for the people who are utterly alone you know as as singles have said to me because there are really insensitive people who don't live alone who will say oh I would love it to just read and sleep and you know a single person will tell you there's only so much reading and sleep you can do on a regular long couch talking about a three-day yontiff how much reading and sleeping could you do on a three-day yawn tip when you're not going crazy craving conversation dialogue human contact so that's it's not a simple thing when we came up with some strategies we shared that in an email it's a really really hard thing to do but in terms of yontiff in Shabbos for us I think it's an interesting rabbinic thing which is I may not be coming back from the rabbinate when this is all over because I discovered this on call Chaves I discovered the selling card like spending time with your family having shots shoot us I discovered you could dive in Shabbos morning and then learn and then take a nap and then have lunch not crazy insane you got this whole lifestyle and it was out there and didn't or existed so I'm not dreading it I feel a little guilty about how excited I am for it of course I'm sad we won't all be together I'm sad we won't be true but there are some ways I'll I'll say and then pass it over in kedusha Billie Akana I think gotta prepare so if you prepare games you prepare topics for conversation you prepare good stories you prepare stimulating questions you prepare these kinds of things then yeah that's the first 25 minutes am i did that by the way yeah we were done by 935 yeah what are you we're gonna wind this down because someone just texted me hey stud it's time to wind this down I won't say I won't say now if the neighbor I'm a buddy but I won't say who it is masculine so what are your suggestions about how we do this oh it's a long day lots of family walks laughs to games in lots of books that's that's the best that I got but I'm with you I'm loving I missed the show I miss people I miss feeling seaboard but shabbos is who we knew was so great who knew so phenomenal shallow showed us outside with my kids singing laughing together and we played more games of monopoly and I mean it there's there's something really beautiful about it but to be Daisy on TIF is a little bit long we've got the yushins coming in here actually on the facebook chat mm piece puzzle that'll take you a little while we've got Jenny both the bookies it's a whatsapp for lending out books for one another there's a lot of reading reading it's fundamental Brody you should know that and so last week you know library's closed but Amazon is open or lending books to one another with gloves and well and some social distancing but using using books is a good way learning tore up all the people who say I never have time now that there's time on our hands yeah we're not talking about singles is not easy we're talking about other people to fill that time Brody what are your suggestions well I told my family I said we're gonna have time that we're gonna spend together it's gonna be time for board games we play basically I'm the cube Rummikub this is my focus I pronounce that game and I say we're all gonna have a long time that's also important everyone gets a long time that's let's say you secure your nap no I'm not Nash and she need a long time and that's when I read I spent the time doing a doc and then I've started this new book which I've had I should have two copies for some reason closure Jesus by Ishmael Yatta Yatta and the same comet I was reading trying for survival so I'm reading about shop lights see this it's very interesting to see you never underestimate me everyone out there wants another copy I got two copies of what's wrong coach you Jesus okay just as long as it's kosher Jesus that you're reading is that my Moskowitz what are you that's a good place to end it's a good it's a nice you know this is the stud place to end as we've been reminded so maybe given that a three-day yontiff coming up a lot of time to learn to read share what you're reading right now what do you what's a good lead you recommend to others in this three-day yontiff let me give a Jewish book in a like a Israel book at their non Israel book have a bet so I'm currently reading someone gifted me a book pumpkin flowers which which I just started a few days ago it's about an israeli army soldier in a different perspective talking about different perspectives tonight so my call mine my mother-in-law is a voracious reader and she's part of all these book clubs and Lawrence I called her up for some recommendations and she told me one of her favorite authors is Eric Larsen and he has a new book out about Churchill so someone actually just sent that to me in the mail as well so I look forward to reading that I'm very excited about I read in the garden of beasts which was I think his last book and I'm very excited to read his new book about Churchill and I know you're both are laughing at me yes I'm a history book nerd and I'm proud of it I I also got some books in the mail reason we both have a friend who's really nice once a year before Pesach he sends us he probably thinks we're both ignorant fools on a decade and those are books to try to keep us educated it's interesting the choices he makes for each of us what he thinks that each of us the gaps we need to fill in in our knowledge so we're grateful to have him I was reading when we when we were in Israel for the Brody wedding which was amazing aiyaaa shadow and Jake great wedding so we visited a Shotaro we had some meetings at Isha Torah and we were handed copies of the brand-new book I mean I got a copy and Moshe got a copy of the brand new book honor of know who I'm Berg's at Sal his biography by our friend Jonathan Rosenblum wrote a great book so I been reading that almost just finished that and really interesting I tell you if you want to get pumped Brody you should read that book because I wanna spit yeah we want to get into outreach and really get this fire lit under you that every one of us has to move that needle on assimilation and outreach and all of that and you understand his story and what he went through and and and what he had to fight it's unbeliev I see Jonathan Rahman just joined this RAC you got a shout out before when I taught everybody the proper way to drink a scotch thank you for joining us we polished off the bottle so sort of Nuremberg I finished that also been trying to use this extra time over Shabbos to do little extra learning and kisara normally the documenting is such a fast pace those doing the zero a little extra time I've been learning with my son-in-law is in town which is a great school and a great pleasure I enjoy it a lot and I've also catching up my friend Dan once gave me a book I've only only had time to catch up when I wanna read which what's the name of the book again it's the whole the targeted assassinations of the Mossad remember the name of it I didn't kill rise and kill it's the thickest book I think I ever saw in my life Brody if you sat on that you'd be like half normal height it's a thickest book I ever saw in my life it's an amazing book it's really nice oh he's swell with pride this one only took you six minutes to reference to get a night right tonight but it's it's you swell with pride about like the Jewish army what they're capable of doing and you also filled with fear about our our young Jewish soldiers who are risking their lives still under the cover to protect us it's an amazing amazing book so finished that of Nuremberg book reading that book and I'm looking forward to to getting into the box that just came of the new books my assigned reading for this for this gentes so that's a good place to end I want to thank on what compare notes um to box of books yeah we will looking forward to I want to thank our panelists throw by Josh Brody I returned out my book return synagogue who also has another job at forget where else he works and a special thank you to rabbi Phillip Mass good thank you to our our corporate sponsor tonight who benefited at least Robbie Moskowitz the I benefited to I got I got the guy wants to sponsor my morning show now so we are we're interested in beverage recommendations if you want to sponsor a beverage recommendation yeah I've you know this just came in from our different Matthew Hackerman who joined us I know now that really give her shows over he's joined us and not I'm saying he was on your weinberger of nürnberg Rebbetzin is very much in need of unfortunately much is very ill so we definitely pause and Dobbin for her we wish her a complete and speedy recovery and the best thank you for reminding us of that we appreciate that very much so if you would like to be a sponsor of coffee what's this thing called capita of coffee talk then let us know you could sponsor the program if you want to be a beverage a product placement sponsor whatever your product is if it's an appropriate product you will do a product placement will leave something your brand your logo it can be a hat article of clothing it could be a beverage but there are three product placement opportunities here with the three screens no sponsor it you want you know food shows up at the door we leave the wrapping the bag will let people see where the food came from whatever hat it could be you know in the laptop book whatever it is the product placement we are very into product placement so to our audience we thank you for joining us as we've done this week to we are week two of not knowing or believing that anyone actually would be interested tonight takes the cake for snark in the comments I really believe that yours done a good job also Thank You Josh latest recommended some reading here the plague by Albert Camus who Camus who I want to point out it so I can pronounce his name correctly and all those who watched really thank you for being with us thank you for this fun and it's been it's a very difficult time a very serious time and now we're yeah by the way I'll tell our friends you know who actually is trying to give us a product placement but it would mean one of his home health care aides sitting I guess the desk first product but and it was free to go anytime we're not keeping yeah but yeah so keep going Brody now just wondering in the last like week yeah the money my are Goldberg saying the money goes to B RS it sounds like we want it yes sponsorship of coffee talk is not helping us it's going to help the needy families really quickly figure out any more than four states that might be a family Kahoot that's coming up do we have a family could we have a family cou coming up and and and there are many people from Boston I will say that were very disappointed my answers last week by the way does anyone have any idea the capital of Vermont couple of Vermont and even when they texted it to you yeah I would say I pronounce it I think it's Montpelier yeah yeah let me just remember think so yes what's the slogan trip around though this Bud's for you is is that the rich shouldn't have the wealth and it should be decided free or die I think it's look for you to die freedom and unity I think it is not I think it to look for you that's what those license plate says research team my research team was telling me it's freedom in unity well what Oh New Hampshire's live free or die they're there right next to each other Rhode Island we've been talking for 80 minutes no one had a comment the thought feedback a question you mentioned state capitals and all of a sudden the check everyone's going crazy live that's all anybody cares about state path what is the state capital of South Dakota South Dakota is a Pierre I have no idea but I know that I met the rabbi from Dakota South Dakota wasn't either rabbi South Dakota dude your brother long noses Benjamin yeah yeah he's actually right now is he on Google yeah yeah he's just a faster typer than I am the reason that he wins the queue every year although we're having his team tested for steroids they've been juicing that's my theory but there's a reason he wins the queue he's a smart guy isn't that it's not bad let's not hopefully empiricism the genes to the nieces and nephews I don't know how that would happen but anyway okay anything else on topic tonight before we know no dessert for me tonight you're in trouble so to summarize thank you so much where should you ever want to fight caution with some math we'll see when we schedule the next coffee talk because next Wednesday night our normal slot will be the say their night they stuff night so they'll be monster can we do that's a Shila we should ask this party rabbis party rabbis what the ruling is that leaving the zoom off you talk on zoom and maybe we'll do a special we'll just do some shameless plugs or my mask which teaches a till and class tomorrow morning what time is your class tomorrow morning 9:30 a.m. tomorrow morning tell him definitely important nowadays to story - what was that how would someone join that they could even go on my facebook feed or on a zoom big welcome to joining the BRS zoom programming whatsapp group we send out all the opportunities I more on my Facebook feed tomorrow morning amazing bro do you have anything coming up you're sure yeah virtual dot Jewish polka dot word it's got a listing of BRS is upcoming virtual program suppose every single purchase so when you're when you're finished with Riley Moskowitz thing you say I want something else to do until the next great BRS program we can fill your time you're doing the frontline we are like this week we're doing something special you just became a co-worker tell everybody what Friday Night Live is whether you're in the room with me or you're watching you let me tell you something Friday Night Live let me just tell you this normally when you start one of these zoom classes you mute everyone we make sure no one's muted that's the best part so you've got people that are singing like people are singing all these great songs which we do every Friday night in there they're in their dining room wherever they might be Sigler living room and then this parts will be like okay now we're gonna stand up we're gonna dance you could just imagine there are people that are single maybe they're living with someone maybe they have a spouse they're literally singing shabbos songs and dancing on Friday afternoon coming into shops it's not on Shabbos itself just glorified always before Shabbos amazing that Friday live right yes we came in from Ted Struhl I can't tell which Ted Struhl Boca tedster oh boy touch drill not sure which but he has a suggested reading for the 3d ant if he says why don't you check out a little book known as the Haggadah it's a good one definitely good one there's a lot of commentary on it that's a good one so we got Friday night we got 10:00 a.m. tomorrow morning 9:30 a.m. on doom and Facebook glad we got Friday Night Live Friday night tomorrow I'll be doing a question I answer at 1:00 p.m. with my cousin rabbi dovid the chef Canora but the chef Ken is one of the great thinkers of our time also tremendously humorous has a column in the mishpokhe amazing and will be in our question and answer tomorrow with the question of how exactly are we related and that's really my question to him and I'm so excited to hear his answer to so that's one px you collect how good it is what is your favorite how got it what are your favorite I got is for people out there oh it's the bling tent I just found out it was the boy touch drew my favorite I got I'll tell you the truth I can't really can I turn this right now I get I've got like a couple shelves I've got almost a bookcase oh my god I love how good is because you know that the Haggadah do you know this is a fact did you know true fact Nagata is the text that the Jewish text that is the most commentary of any text we're in the Commish everybody and we know that everybody's written a huh gutter everybody right so I gotta so and through people's Haggadah you learned so much about their perspective of their approach their attitude their way of thinking on life so I collect their gutters and I love how does every year I get some new gutters my father who should live well and healthy for many years and we're together please God mostly for pace off every a free gift he gets me anyone gotta I mean got one this year I don't know if you should do you should write a hot gotta yeah so so there are some great huh gutters great how guys out there so what are some of my favorite huh goddess my sax is I got is like an obvious that's like a slam dunk or my sex as an amazing I gotta although her gutters I don't know if the Haggadah is the most commented on text then rabbi salivate Rick's comment re oh my god ah must have more huh gutters than anything else in the world but we still have a check I was really fantastic innocence acts and to say cuz a beautiful I got I've gotten into her company asked you said gotta I'm so glad I was looking at the Benny hi Sagada from Cassius Haggadah the sifter has a new as a beautiful incredible Haggadah the shambhala how like it how got her golden unlocking the key he's got an amazing together my friends teacher I've been using as a beautiful means I may have got a minimalist I've been using the same of my house now arts girl children's 5 years old the same Haggadah since I was five years old it has my matzah and grape juice in corrosive stains for the last 34 years but me I'm a minimalist I like to sit there at the Seder with the authentic tax you didn't ask me which I got I bring to the Seder that's a difference a der no no no that's a totally different question I'm with you I like the old not the Maxwell House what's the other one with their like numbered lines what do they call that public but I'll tell you what I'm into this year is because you know my grandma I know I don't look old enough have a grandson I get that all the time but my grandson his name is reac and he's not named for him but he had the same name the Kashia Glover the crusher gone he was that a chief Rimmer was the rush diva of time talking Lynn and he has a hot gutta which I happen to notice I have but I hadn't really looked at the Haggadah of the aritsts V of the crusher Glover are you a TV so with my grandson sitting on my lap re AC I've been trying to take a look at the Haggadah of re AC so that became my favorite one so far wipes that I should show you the gross crumbs that have collected over the last 34 years and my I gotta nice it's amazing you know there's a min up that when you get stains on your Kittel from the seder you're not supposed to watch it wash it because when you come on Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur those of a good worn out kettle from the Seder are your suppose they represent you and they advocate for you on the young you may have dim white you do that until I spoke in front of 2,000 people in the UM no rhyme and then my family was like you need a stainless get oh it's embarrassing already I'm just taking a bottle of grape juice pouring it all over my kids all right ladies and gentlemen thank you for joining us please continue to tune into the many classes learning opportunities got a little insight to how we make our decisions again we call on everybody to hear both sides let's work together we're a team wishing everyone only the best health and security and happiness and prosperity and peace of mind and faith in Hashem and growth in Torah and knock us from the kinder and shun bias and good health of man customs a man should be a good chap and say go the long showers a go to 9 p.m. moats usamos optimism glass-is-half-full lessons of Kosovo 9 p.m. no hackers join us be there or be square like midnight everybody see you next time