Living With Emunah (Part 330) - Know the Shepherd

good morning Andes goodes and a and a good Arab shabas it's Wednesday you could say good Arab chabas every greeting that we have every Jewish greeting that we have so should be B we should hear good news please God you know um it's the Gregorian New Year which for us in some way should be meaningless because we have our own New Year it's called rashash Shana and of course the contrast between the two the to me everyone's wishing me a happy New Year happy New Year happy New Year out in the world it occurred to me that on rashash we don't wish people a Happy New Year we wish them a shatova a good year it's an interesting contrast between that blessing being may be happy versus may it be good happiness is not necessarily a Jewish aspiration or a Jewish blessing I don't know that we ever felt entitled to be happy or search for happiness or pursued happiness if you pursue goodness then you find happiness so we wish maybe I'm very Rabbi and daring up a little too much here but when you wish people good so if you have good you find happy but if you wish people happy then it's often Elusive and you're pursuing it you don't have good and you don't have happy so should be a good g a good Gregorian New Year said that rakov ketki the great rash yov Z would turn to his students and he'd say new what resolution are you making so he said rebi it's not rashash Shana it's just a secular New Year we don't hold of that so said is it possible that the whole world is making resolutions and you are not whether you hold of it or not the whole world's busy making resolutions that they won't keep and the membership will be cancel in a month but the whole world's making resolutions Could It Be The Whole World's making resolutions and we're not so sometimes you don't have to buy into something to be inspired by it and to use it to propel us to take on a uh a big practice to be inspired Aruna series is generally sponsored by Dr zav Morgan in memory of RAB Dr Brian galber in memory of Dr Ellen schanzer very grateful as always to the Morgans for their tremendous tremendous generosity he did not write in an email but if you missed last shabas afternoon the conversation with Alex CLA you missed something a story of hhus that was absolutely extraordinary I'm not going to repeat the whole thing he's been on many podcasts you could listen there and we don't have the time and I can't do it justice in his words but the story of what he gave up an incredible career touring with the most famous people because he began to keep shabas and pesak his record label cut him he had no money and he owed his band he was deeply in debt he went to meet with his Rabbi who he was complaining this is my this is my reward I'm starting to keep shabas and I'm losing my whole livelihood and I'm losing my future career the rabbi said you're a modern day ab ainu just like AB sacrificed his whole future when Hashem told him to bind his son yak and he was willing to do it and he was prepared to sacrifice his whole future and Hashem said don't worry I'll make it worth your while you'll be blessed Hashem so so his rebi told him just stick tight and the rest of the story Microsoft was making a commercial for a product it barely ever sold but needed a song and hired someone to find a song when the person made their way to La they stopped at a friend's house first and that friend was one of the hundred people in America who had bought Alex cla's album was playing it right when he stopped by and he heard the song and said what's that and who's that and then he decided to bring that song to Microsoft who loved it and said do you have the rights to it he said absolutely but he didn't he had to track down Alex CLA who by then was learning in Yeshiva and Yim had forgotten about it had given up on his career essentially and he said sure you can have the rights to that song and fast forward I'm leaving out a lot of details but fast forward lo and behold he gave up the rights to the song Microsoft put the commercial everywhere people heard it didn't really care about the product Internet Explorer I think it was but but love the song it was right when Shazam came out which was an app that you could hear a song and find out more about who produced it and download the album and about five six months later he's sitting learning in Yeshiva when he gets a call on the pay phone because he was tracked down by a radio station in Germany who says you need to come tomorrow he said why they said because you're number one in Germany your album is sold this song is number one it went to number three in the UK and number seven in America and it blew up and went viral and continues to this day to have a million downloads a month and provide for his parasa and his rebbi was right he was prepared to sacrifice it all for a relationship with Hashem to keep shabas and Hashem turned to him and said you won't be sacrificing anything I'll take care of you and all story again I'm not doing it justice a lot more details but it was an incredible conversation it was a great shabas with him let me share a couple emails and then we'll dive back into our text dear by Goldberg I want to share with you adopting amuna focused mindset has given me so much more peace where I would normally have experienced stress worry and frustration in my life we've been focused on we're never lost we're never lost and we're never late we are always where we're meant to be wherever we are is where we're meant to beem is in that place now what's our mission and as we spoke about at length last week that is not a perspective that we impose on others you don't tell someone a hostage in a tunnel that's where you're meant to be you don't tell someone in a hospital bed that's where you're meant to be you don't tell someone waiting and longing to be married that's where you're meant to be that's not something we impose on others but it's how we live for ourselves when it comes to others you're not meant to be there and I'm gonna get you out when it comes to ourselves whatever wherever we are after all of our efforts it must be that's where we're meant to be not to ruin the ending but this isn't one of those stories where everything worked out I have a friend visiting South Africa she kindly offered to bring back some goodies back to Israel for me like anyone made alii jumped at the opportunity to restock some of my favorite items from home including supplements I can only get there I had organized everything and paid extra Courier fees to ensure my par off supplements would arrive where she was staying ahead of her departure date I usually follow up on deliveries with all theim and holidays I didn't check again assuming as always The Courier would deliver as per usual then today I received an image from my friend with the item she received to bring back for me and lo and behold my supplements were missing I quickly sent off an email to try and get the delivered today but after much back and forth it wasn't possible I recognized this was just one of those things and getting me getting upset about it was not going to change anything that's the truth always about anger anger doesn't make supplements arrive anger doesn't make the packager come anger doesn't make the red light turn green or the flight leave on time or the person behave the way you want all anger does is compromise your mental health physical health your happiness and push away the people around us each of the emails I wrote to the company was polite in the past perhaps I would have been more CT and rude and I kept saying to myself it is out of my hands if it's meant to be it will happen if not please God there'll be someone else coming at some stage who could bring them I can't emphasize enough how listening to the podcast and learning from the teachings gave me the ability to deal calmly with this after much back and forth on email with maintaining a common amuna focused approach customer support lady apologize she couldn't help me in time refunded me the Courier fees which I did not ask for although I will not be getting the full order I'm grateful I was able to deal with this in such a stressfree way thanks as always for the shum may we see Speedy Return of the hostages and our soldiers be safe warm and dry amain simple insignificant I don't mean to knock her supplements not arriving as insignificant I think she would probably agree the point is just again the more we incorporate and live and apply amuna in our lives the more it empowers us to stay calm and to maintain our Serenity and our peace and our relationships because the opposite won't achieve any result it will only sacrifice and compromise it it'll only sacrifice and compromise it um okay dear Goldberg I'm typing this email on my phone Reagan rington National Airport on my way home from was unfortunately a most disappointing trip I'm a lawyer in my early 30s in my early 20s I seriously considered joining law enforcement but for various reasons I decided to become a lawyer instead from a young age like many other I was fascinated by police work and law enforcement I he gave up on giving a Shepherd I guess that was last week I strongly believe in from people joining law enforcement at all levels local state or federal it's an excellent way to contribute to Public Service improve and develop personal mentally and physically and teach valuable skills like using firearms and handling dangerous situations on a more practical level it's politically important for the safety of Jewish and from communities thankfully more and more from individuals have been joining law enforcement and succeeding that said many agencies are extremely selective they have rigorous standards and the government is notoriously slow in its hiring process just getting an interview can take months or even years for months I've been physically training preparing for the day I would get the call I still have several active and pending applications when the agency I most desired flew me down for testing I was ecstatic they flew me in the night before the exam this was the first time I'd been away from my family since getting married five years ago the next morning the schedule was packed with tests and an interview if I succeeded in those stages the day would have concluded the physical fitness test running push-up sit-ups followed by a polygraph exam the next day unfortunately I was informed I wouldn't need to take the physical exam I had a hunch I hadn't performed well enough earlier so I wasn't completely shocked still it stung I trained for months for that physical exam and I didn't even get the chance to take it I called my wife and we immediately recognized that as a quote Rabbi Goldberg living with amuna moment with a TM trademark I reminded myself this wasn't what Hashem wanted for me at least not right now I told her I believe I could Excel of given another shot but I don't know if or when that opportunity will come if Hashem wills it I hope it happens later that evening I decided to at least try to make it Tom Mar but as I approached my rental car I discovered the tire was completely flat I couldn't help but laugh it was a cherry on top candidates are automatically booked for three nights in two days so pass or fail I was stuck in Maryland on the training grounds until my flight the following evening the next morning I found the close of shakas at 7: a.m. normally that's not too early for me but after the day I had it felt unnecessarily early still I went when I arrived I found the outer gate locked just on a man wearing his Towson fill and came to unlock it and said are you a Coen yes I replied and he said am I and I asked am I the only W he nodded with a smile and replied yes I smiled and chuckled to myself I knew at that moment I was meant to be there I entered the sh he barely had a minion I was by far the youngest person in the room I could tell they were happy to see a new face I don't know why hashm didn't orchestrate things so I could pass all the test and make it and still make it sh as the Coen but it's not how it works I'm still hopeful this position or one of the other top roles I'm pursuing will eventually work out for now I'll hold on to this amuna moment and the story of being the Coen 10th man for a minion in Maryland PS please tell Ben Shapiro to be my best friend I'll be sure to let him know but you know much better than no offense Ben Shapiro Hashem is your best friend what's better than that and no one needs me to tell them tell Hashem to do that again more significant this person trained and dreams and worked hard and wants it and I share these emails with you I read them for myself because the next time we're in a hard situation next time we're disappointed the next time we're frustrated the next time we're tempted to get angry the next time something that doesn't work out the way we drew it up that trademark that living with amuna moment is our chance to rise to the occasion it's our test it's our call to action maybe it's our Min and how lucky we are that it's not about giving up our whole career God forbid our child maybe it's something smaller and yet when we rise to that occasion we are Z we Merit such incredible blessing am insignificant maybe the people around him in his life won't even know it but he trained he worked hard he dreamt and instead of being disappointed and instead of being depressed instead of spiraling down instead of saying minion marak forget you God you forgot me wow in that moment he says that's not where I'm meant to be it's not what I'm meant to be doing and I'm so grateful hashm will put me where I'm supposed to go and I'm so blown away I'm so impressed by that let me read one more we're going up in levels of consequence I don't mean to minimize anyone else's emails or or what they're going through but just for our own experience or inspiration every message is sent at the right time just like I was so grateful for you being AEM in another case I'm very grateful this week yesterday I went for my first prenatal appointment after finishing the scans they found no heartbeat while I was waiting to speak to the doctor I said to Hashem thank you for this act of din of judgment Justice which is wrapped in Rahim compassion I know this could have ended far worse due to my history andem you heard myos that if it wasn't meant to be for us to have another child right now it should be without too much pain and sorrow when I woke up this morning I had in mind what you said last week about the bra Hashem does for us all of our needs I took pause and really thought about how much Hashem has bestowed upon us and we have everything we need we're so blessed in our lives and hashm had to say no right now but I'm grateful for when and how he chose to say no there's definitely sadness and hashem's timing with khaka is making it easier for me and my husband to choose happiness and focus on all the light in our lives thank you for being Hashem once again it's been a journey working on my relationship with Hashem you've helped him bring him to the Forefront now with this bump in the road give me the tools to approach at head on and hopefully become even closer to Hashem remember he's in control and we're never lacking we have whatever we're meant to have and whatever we need by definition wow these are wow moments to leave a doctor's office with no heartbeat and to say well at least thank you Hashem for letting me know this early or in this way without further pain and if it's not meant to be right now I accept that with a full heart and we'll look at the light not at the darkness we'll look at what we have not what's missing we'll look at the good that's there and not what we feel as the bad sad sad as we've shared countless times in this year to deny or suppress or pretend we're not sad is to do a disservice to to ourselves and our experience and our emotions and is unhelpful all it will do is Will bottle it up and it will blow up later lean in be sad cry a tear there's grieving there's mourning there's bereavement we believe in that but against a backdrop and a foundation of within my sadness and within my sorrow there's a sense of there's a Hashem there's a plan there's a reason it makes sense and for whatever reason right now and then I turn and I DAV and I beg and I storm the heavens Hashem give her a healthy baby and let the supplements arrive with someone else and let him break into law enforcement if that's where he's meant to be because who knows if hasem understands what would happen if he were in law enforcement for his family that he hasn't left in five years until then hasem knows best but we DAV of course we DAV we want to break through we want to take our initiative we want things to be based on our finite limited perspective the way we think is best but with all that in the end we say Hashem if you conclude differently if you have a different plan that I am where I meant to be that I am where I'm meant to be if that is the end we're almost at the height of Kaneka tonight tomorrow Z KH Z this is the end the zos the brightest lights brightest lights we're almost there tonight's the last night Savor the moment stick around turn off your phone put it on airplane mode the lotas the donuts the drele the concerts the toys the gifts the wait sit and stare the lights are bright they're burning the brightest tonight this world has so much darkness and we need that light so desperately and so badly and there are people with such Darkness we want and we pray for light in their lives and in ours look at that light Savor that light ingest that light be transformed by that light be that light see in that light the blessings of your life that are often right under our nose that we've neglected and ignored and forgotten about and those lights are right there they're right there they're right there they're right there and be that light for someone else we invited someone over who lit candles with us last night who mentioned they hadn't gotten a happy Kaneka from anyone they hadn't gotten a gift and this was their only kanaka experience if you're lighting candles with anyone else let that light see that blessing in your life think of someone who might be lighting alone and invite them to light with you this last night textt them reach out to them call them as we wrote about this week the research the studies that show eight minutes can save a person's life eight minutes can give somebody eight minutes with a friend eight minutes with a friend could push away and prevent depression anxiety clinical things eight minutes who doesn't have eight minutes in these eight nights eight minutes it's the last night the last chance and if khek is over when you're listening to this you're still allowed to call someone go a good chabus a goodes a good year a good day a good hour a good minute a good moment you're still allowed to you're still allowed to it can make all the difference in a person's life so you light those candles they're burning the brightest eight candles tonight see the blessing that's under our nose if these people if someone could leave a doctor's office with no heartbeat and still see and find and search for the blessing and choose because it's not an emotion it's a decision choose the happiness then we can as well transforms our lives we're on page and this little chapter is the idea paradoxically you got to pray for Faith pray for Faith who are you praying to Faith to whom are we praying for Faith takes Faith to pray so what does it mean to pray for Faith seems it seems counterintuitive or paradoxical or circular so is quoting from sadik this was hasem is my shepherd I shall not lock God you prefare prepare all of my needs whatever I have is what I need I want more I'm working for more you want me to take Initiative for more but whatever I have is what I need you prepare all my needs you are my shepherd I'm not lacking anything I lack nothing but says says no was saying something different may I never be lacking in knowing god you're my shepherd I want to walk around all the time knowing you're my shepherd may I never be lacking in knowing you're my shepher in a doctor's office in a boardroom in the supermarket next to my candles delayed in an airport Wherever Whenever Hashem may I never be lacking in knowing Hashem that you are my that you are my shepherd I'll repeat a story I've shared several times from of Weinberger quotes that he first read it in a readers's digest years ago still they still come out with Readers Digest who knows so they told the story of a poetry reading contest you remember the story G to repeat it anyway because it Bears repeating the poetry reading contest people submitted early they practiced and it came for the big contest the big competition that day people had read registered and submitted what they were going to be reading which piece of poetry and the judges sat and the audience was watching and one by one they came on the stage and the end of the contest right after the last uh contestant had performed an old man with a cane walked up to the judges and said I'd like to read a piece of poetry they said I'm sorry you didn't uh register you're not included he said please decided for this old man they would indulge him they would allow it they would let him so let him read what did he choose Psalm 23 cap and he gets up and he reads A Psalm of David the Lord is my shepherd I shall not lack though God causes me to lie down and lost pastures and so on and so forth he reads cap and the judges convene and they're blown away and unanimously they award him the winner of this poetry reading contest so this young man this young man who had chosen the same reading storms up to the old man and he says to him I don't understand I had a coach I had a trainer I practiced since I'm young I submitted to this contest early I worked hard and I got ready I got up and I read it how did you win last minute you came you decided the last moment to read it how why did you win how did you beat me so the old man turned to him and he said you read a poem about a Shepherd I know the shepherd you read a poem about a Shepherd I know the shepherd I know the shepherd so that's why so that's whyem the Lord is my shepherd I shall not lack Hashem you're my shepherd may I never stop knowing you're my shepherd you're shepherding me through life sometimes I Veer off the path you get me back on the path last week we spoke about mosha the little lamb that he put on his shoulders let me carry you you're tired you're thirsty Hashem says let me carry you you're tired you're thirsty you're lost it's great if you're on the path and you're with the herd and you're doing great hasem says keep going if we Veer off Hashem say whoa whoa whoa whoa wait you're about to turn off the path gives us a little nudge gives us a little patch gives us a little redirect get back on the path sometimes we Veer all the way off the path and he says come let me carry you on my shoulders and bring you back let me take you back on the path back on the D Hashem Hashem you're my shepher I never stop knowing that you're my shepherd even if I feel I'm tempted to feel challenged to feel all alone in a doctor's office with a disappointment where are you how could you why would you no L May I never ever feel lacking then says we read a couple of weeks ago that when and R were Barren suffering waiting for a child opposite is wife all his life we have a tradition that isto is the Jewish people right the and the God and the Jewish people have a loving a marriage is the Jewish people what was mayem always be opposite the Jewish people may wherever we go in life whatever we're experiencing in life whatever we need in life whatever Joy whatever happiness don't forget Hashem whatever low whatever challenge don't forget AEM what was his was what was theem always be opposite the Jewish people and with his he inspired and he strengthened us that no matter where no matter what no matter when whatever is happening in our life we can lean on we can rely on we can turn to we can be supported by we can find him planted in US put in our DNA that capacity no matter what we're going through in life and that's what it means to DAV that we can DAV sometimes a person is going through a hard thing they've experienced a loss and then a loss on top of that loss would be a loss of a relationship with hasem Martin juditz Shalom our beloved Martin juditz we miss Martin Martin one of the the founders one of the heroes one of the Builders of our community very very special man a holocaust Survivor in several occasions I had the chance to interview him onah for children of our community y program and privately we had an incredibly close relationship and I asked him Martin he lost everything his whole family in De he was anle of the de of of the Marcel you see the pictures he shared in the back of his wonderful Memoir as a little boy he lost his whole world he lost his whole family he lost everything but he never lost his faith a founder of our community he was a a pillar a fixture in our daving in building a community in his am and his and how I asked him how could you do it you weren't angry how could you maintain your faith I'll never forget what he answered you could probably find it online I'm sure it's on on YouTube one of these interviews and he said he said I had lost so much I lost my mother I lost my father I lost my siblings I lost my family I lost my community I had already lost both my parents why should I choose to lose my Father in Heaven too it was hard enough to live life without my physical parents how would I manage without my heavenly father so he made the choice with whatever feelings he had and had to work through which were undeniable for anyone who went through what he went through he made the choice that if it was hard enough to live and navigate without his phys phical father why would he try to live and navigate without his his father in sh why would he why would he so he maintained his faith in Hashem because he had lost so much why would he want to lose Hashem too so there is this PR teaches planted that DNA in us we all have that ability when going through a hard time to D into Hashem Hashem I don't see you right now and I don't feel you right now and I don't feel your love for me and I don't feel close to you but I'm asking you let me feel it because it will be harder without you so I'm doing to you Hashem I'm doing to you that I want to do to you I'm doing to you that I believe in you I'm doing to you that you make yourself known to me that I can feel you in my life so very counterintuitively and paradoxically we have a precedent from and we have a notion and idea to DAV that we can DAV to DAV that we have faith it's sounds silly but it's not to turn to Hashem to ask him for help to see Hashem to feel Hashem to want to be close to Hashem how do we acquire this this Faith how do we grow in it next chapter Faith does not come easily you think it should to go to the shear and you read these emails if you listen to and I have a whole folder of these emails in my email online and offline in hard time go back and read them and you read this and you say why in the world would anyone live without it how do you possibly have what it takes to overcome whatever challenges in life without it why would you live without it these emails all end with i maintained my cool my calm my connection to the people around me with Hashem even though it was difficult and it was challenging and nonetheless why wouldn't you but it's not easy you know why because when things don't go your way it's hard when you don't see them or feel them or when when things are incredibly happy and successful you forget about him that's also an enormous danger when you're riding on top of the world and everything's great and everything's going your way how easy is it how easy is it to forget it was him the things that we Daven for yesterday that came through today do we thank him for tomorrow or do we just move on to the next list of things that we need it's so important we're getting up to in it's we'll get back to after kekah we're up to modm modm is my favorite modm is one of the most important modm thankful to be mindful and conscious to pause and to list and to count the things that were're faithful for almost every day Hashem says yes to something we asked for yesterday but how often do we stop to say thank you thank you the drer went well the speech went well the technology worked thank you my children are safe they're at home thank you we got from point A to point B thank you that thing I was so worried about worked out we have a whole list of things that we need that we ask for but how often do we stop and say thank you when it works out we forget we move on we go forward you have to say thank you doesn't come easily it takes enormous effort it takes superum effort mindfulness Consciousness it takes enormous effort to instill to plant amuna in our hearts to work out the amuna muscle to put on the amuna glasses glasses to look at the world through the amuna perspective tells us ostensibly talking about Torah in general that if a person says that or means I put in effort I worked I toiled took effort and I got a result there was a result there was a return on my effort and believe them if a person says you know it landed in my lap you know I downloaded it easily you know it just happened to be it didn't take effort didn't take work didn't take toil just came to be don't believe them no pain no gain you know who said that no pain no gain none of you remember no pain no gain no pain no gain kazal said it it's a mish yeah I know you were thinking about Jane Fonda or uh what was that gym that old gy called no pain no gain I don't know Richard Simmons didn't he just pass away oh blessed memory no pain no gain they didn't say it they didn't say it they didn't coin it our fact corrector our fact Checker will let me know later but they didn't say it you know who said a kazal the says according to your pain is your reward according to the pain is the reward no pain no gain according to the pain is the reward if a person says I didn't go work out I never made it to the gym I didn't lift any weights I didn't do sit-ups and push-ups but I woke up this morning and my muscles are much bigger don't believe him I didn't make any efor but it all worked out don't believe him but the person who says I tried I worked I toiled and and I found that's a believe is not just something like would you believe one day it just clicked and it happened and for the rest of my life I looked at life differently no we say every day in our daving a from talking then out of the effort and the toil and the work of the father of Faith inem his heart wasto so the first thing you need to know before we'll talk about the methodology and the strategy and how to work on it is it takes work it's hard but here's the deal anything in life that's worthwhile takes work and it's hard marriage parenting take effort they take work you know the most rewarding thing in life is children and the most painful thing in life children is children because anything rewarding takes pain takes effort takes effort that was the article two weeks ago or three weeks ago about the low birth rate the people the whole world now choosing not to have children it's inconvenient it's uncomfortable it's expensive and I just want what makes me happy literally threatening Extinction in developed countries prioritizing ourselves over others our present over our future anything in life that's worthwhile takes effort living a healthy life you want longevity you want your joints to work you want to get on the floor and play with your great-grandchildren you want to be around for your great- grandchildren you want to walk down their is and still being push down it then it makes takes effort to exercise to get enough sleep to eat right to do the things today that you have to do to live your future self tomorrow but nobody wants to because those donuts are so good and if you paid $100 per donut you might as well eat it so so it's hard it's very hard it takes effort anything worthwhile takes effort Health relationships marriages take effort but a a wonderful marriage a rewarding marriage a gratifying satisfying marriage if a person is z to really two halves become a whole to live to be a shing person there's nothing better in light in the world the world but it takes effort mindfulness Consciousness compromise sacrifice intention and effort parenting marriage career professional ambition the list could go on and on so what all those things will take effort but Amun is just going to land in your lap that relationship with hem that's just going to be a given and granted to you and a gift it all takes effort anything worthwhile anything meaningful takes effort and that's the hinted to alluded to in the question that we're all asked when we come to the world of Truth when we meet our maker theas shabas tells us we're asked to series of questions when we come upstairs and the first one is did you do your business dealings Faithfully the simple understanding is were you honest did you have integrity was your word your bond were you trustworthy were you reliable or did you advertise falsely did you exaggerate did you cut Corners did you file your taxes dishonestly what happens when you come upstairs and you saym I wasn't in business I didn't do business why is the Heavenly Court asking me did I do my business with integrity and honesty and Faithfully I'm not a businessman I'm not a business woman I wasn't in business that's not question says the question is not literally about your business honesty and integrity the question is did your do the way that people deal with business speak to a driven ambition business person man or woman oh that's all they think about dream about falling asleep in the shower awake doing working out all they're thinking about is their business an idea can mark Market a customer or we can we can cut costs or we can increase our profits or we can hire or we can cut person and business is constantly challenging themselves and thinking and growing taking stock quarterly and annually and looking at and Reporting did you bring that same sense of seriousness did you bring the same sense of evaluating right it's the Gregorian New Year how many businesses how many people privately in their own business are taking stock let's look at the past last year let's look at our revenue and our profit margin let's look at our pnls let's look at how did we do did we meet our expectations come in under or over what are our goals let's set goals for the future year so all of those conversation all that lingo all that language all that effort that we do in business life do we do it to life do we look at our marriage our parenting our character our sh attendance and do we say okay let's take stock quarterly annually do we come in under our goals over goals let's set our goals for the next year how do we do that's the question says will be asked because maybe I'll say I'm not in business why am I being asked that the answer is the question is not about how did you act in business but did you bring to your amuna the same sense of ambition and drive the same evaluation and reflection that you brought to your business to your business we'll pick up with this next week we have to end here because everyone's invited Shapiro fantastic speaker speaking in six minutes everyone's invited into the main sh we'll pick up with this next time but um no she next week on Wednesday no she on Wednesday I'm gonna put out an amuna next week because I'm giving an amuna but I'll be in London it's not if you're in London I don't know yet what's public or private that I'm speaking I'll try to share um but kanaka tonight look at those candles light up your life light up somebody else's life get lit in life be on fire in all that we do and bask in that light that please God will dispel the darkness and bring only a lot of great light for all of us should be a great day in a goodes