What should leaders do when you mess up

my first jli class I taught I stood by a Podium teaching but I was very uncomfortable I couldn't pinpoint it exactly why and I realized why everybody's sitting and I'm standing something is not working here I felt like I'm lecturing to a crowd rather than talking with people okay friends The Story begins the next passage of talmud that we're going to explore which is on 32A and we discuss the interaction between God and Moses after the sin of the golden calf and we learn a lot over here about leadership um this is actually relevant by the way to an upcoming event on the Jewish calendar an unfortunate event the 17th of tamas the 17th of tamas is a fast day and among the atrocities that took place on the 17th of tamos it was The Siege of Jerusalem that had taken place and the um that's when the Babylonians had broke through the walls to ultimately lead to the destruction of the temple 3 weeks later the nth of a but one of the earlier atrocities that took place on that same date mosha breaking the tablets because it was supposed to be 10 commandments not 15 right that was Mel Brooks's opinion but that's not actually the story that's not actually the story in the Torah right mosha breaks these tablets because we were sinning with the golden calf so perhaps the sad thing was not so much that Moses broke the tablets although that is kind of sad but why Moses broke the tablets was the bigger deal now I I just want to give some context here not directly related to the part of time that we're going to analyze but it'll give context as to you know we're trying to learn about leadership from Moshe and it's like the guy the guy lost his cool came down the mountain he saw us mess up and granted we've messed up catastrophically that was a big deal we were essentially cheating on God we just heard from the Ten Commandments themselves don't commit idolatry and we're committing idolatry right which is almost akin to adulter because we're essentially cheating on God and Moses is furious and he breaks the tablets and the commentaries ask well wait a minute if you analyze the text in the Torah it wasn't a shocker it wasn't like Moshe came down and saw us doing what we're doing and we're like Moses is not what you think that that's not what happened Moshe knew about it God told Moshe Moshe look at what these people are doing so when Moshe came down he was warned already so wasn't he wasn't like surprised why did he get so angry and break those tablets so there's two lessons here number one you you don't believe bad things about Jewish people even if God says it that's that's a powerful lesson right um that that is powerful leadership was unfathomable and Mosa's mind it wasn't like oh man but if you look at the text mosha was upset not only that they were sinning but the Torah says explicitly that they were dancing around the S around the calf around the golden calf they were dancing around if you have the urge to sin okay I get it we're human we make mistakes right we're valuable we we're not we're not perfect but you're dancing you're doing it with passion and pride and you're enjoying it and you're waving your flags all over I'm going to get canceled for this but you're you're waving your flags all over the place making a big stink out of your own sins that's a problem Moshe was just so infuriated by the passion and joy that they were investing in it okay so Moshe then admonishes the Jewish people that's between Moshe and the Jewish people but between Moshe and God the dialogue looked very different to us MO is furious we had correction to do but from God in Moses's side of the conversation mosha was serving as our advocate so he's playing two roles here right that's incredible leadership because he cares about us enough to get angry yet when it comes to God he's he's standing up for us he's sticking up for us um in fact the Zohar points out something quite interesting because it contrasts MOS to Noah to Noah as well but it contrasts MOS to Noah I have three leers right Noah opens up shop building this Arc for 120 years and he um you know God made it take that long so he could give people the opportunity to ask questions and repent and and Noah did not succeed in getting anybody to repent Noah didn't even reach outs to anybody apparently he didn't do any out reach imagine opening up a kabad house for 120 years right 120 year construction project similar to Art I'm kidding but but the difference is no didn't manage to get one person in the door other than his own family Abraham though got many people through his door and Moshe not only Advocate you know abah at least advocated for the people of Sadam maybe there's innocent people there mosha advocated for guilty people so Noah advocated for nobody abrah advocated for the innocent people or potentially innocent people turns out there wasn't any it was similar to Gaza no I'm um if when this goes on YouTube they might take me down you might not see this next I'm just kidding um but then mosha Advocates even for guilty people a whole new level and let's take a look at the at the text over here in addition in additional aspect of the sin of the golden calf God told Moshe now leave me be right stop arguing with me that my wrath will be enraged against them and I'll be and I'll consume them and I'll make you a great nation right don't plead with me just leave it the way it is I'm angry and they deserve it and I'm going to take them down and we're going to start over with you I'm gonna make you a great nation now most politicians mosha was by no means a politician he was a man of Truth most politicians would say wait I'm getting a promotion right on the backs of other people this is perfect but mosha was no politician and he didn't go for it right that's when Moshe says erase me from your book because if you're getting rid of them you're getting rid of me right explaining this verse ra one of the sages of the talud said were the verse not written in this manner it would be impossible to in deference to God the phrase leave me be right God says to mosha leave me alone so the T says well leave me alone what's the context here Moshe was pestering God to forgive them right this teaches that mosha grab the Holy One BS be he is a person who grabs his friend by His Garment would right obviously not in the literal sense because God doesn't wear clothing and he said before him master of the Universe I won't leave you until you forgive and pardon them I'm not letting go I'm not going to let this one slide which is interesting by the way there's another situation in the Torah where Moshe wouldn't let God um wouldn't leave God Alone begging to get into the promised land and finally God said leave me alone and mosha listened but over here when it came to the Jewish people mosha wouldn't listen so when it comes to himself okay I'm going to respect your space god when it comes to the Jewish people that he's responsible for sorry this is non-negotiable right this is incredible leadership because again what would many leaders do send the blame downward I wasn't there not my fault right Dave Ramsey says great leaders send the credit downward and the blame upward right it's a beautiful line it's really powerful because this is what Moses was doing he was or at least he was he was trying to prevent the blame from going downward in the same verse I'm going to read the next paragraph in the same verse God promises Moses and I'll make of you a great nation what was Moses's response now before we get to Moses's response what was the average person's response What would most people say h i me right leadership promotion they sinned anyways they had it coming okay you me god let's let's let we're off let's leave him behind uh that's not what mosha did right mosha said no no erase me from your Torah but the there's a the tal would kind of fills us in with what the dialogue was like a little bit more details what was Moses's response said Moses said before the Holy One Blessed Be he Master of the Universe if a chair with three legs the collective Merit of the three forefathers is unable to stand before you in your moment of Wrath all the more so that a chair with one leg like my Merit alone won't be able to withstand your wrath so Moses says to God you want to start just with me well if the Patriarchs which are three ain't good enough how do I know you're not going to dump me but you're dumping them maybe you're G to dump me too and they're three I'm one that's Moses's reply okay we're going to dive back into that in a moment right Circle that for a second let's read the next paragraph moreover but I have a sense of Shame before my forefathers right I have a sense of like I'm I'm going to replace Abraham Isaac and Jacob by the way that's again powerful leadership humility toward the leaders that had come before you humility toward the leaders whom you've uh used as stepping stones to advance now they'll say see this leader that God placed over Israel he requested greatness for himself but did not pray for God to have mercy upon them in their troubled time Moses says God it's going to look bad doesn't sound very alteristic um there's a interesting talk from the explaining how altruistic it actually is um because he's addressing the perspective of people he's understanding where people are coming from not necessarily focusing on his own desires let's take a step back for a second I want to go back to this chair thing right God says Moses we're starting over with you and Moses says God if a chair with three legs Ain't Gonna Stand how much more so a chair with one leg isn't going to stand and the commentary Rashi points out what is this chair with three legs the Patriarchs Abraham Isaac and Jacob but I want to take a step back for a moment where does this analogy chair have to do with anything what is the chair analogy again when we learn the a parts of T the non parts of T right the parts of tal that are that are instructional in terms of Jewish practice are um have a specific way of interpretation and are for the most part literal and need to be contextualized the parts of the T that are more philosophical like we're going through now an anecdotal um you know the sages are essentially speaking in cryptic language and it's important that we try to somewhat decode what did the sages intend or at least suppose what the sages may have intended they use the analogy of a chair but for some reason we have this chair and without three legs it ain't going to stand right what is the that's what is the situation talking about the survival of Jewish people the survival of Jewish people because Mo God says is suggesting we destroy the Jewish people start over with Moses and Moses says there was three legs hold in this chair now you want one leg hold in the chair so what is this chair this chair is something that's holding up the Jewish people well what could it possibly be referring to so I came across a mimer a teaching from the AL author the T and in his discourses where he discusses the par ofi and he analyzes the ha Torah for parus he actually talks about the analogy of chairs because the prophet Isaiah quotes God saying the heavens is my chair and the Earth is my foot stol and wait God has a chair this chair was held up by the Patriarchs we'll soon see what that means right the three legs Moses saying one leg won't work what is a chair God sits my Mones writes that one of the 13 principles of Jewish faith is that God is Not a Human Being God doesn't have human features and don't have we we cannot believe that God has um literal human features even when the Torah says it it's not literal the Torah is speaking anthropomorphically did I get that word right okay the Torah say that six times test the Torah is speaking anthropomorphically it's it's not literal God doesn't have a body to sit in a chair right so what is a chair well let's think about the concept when when you're standing up you have a certain presence you're kind of removed you're you know what I think about actually when I first when we when we had first moved here and I first started teaching so I taught jli right that was one of the first classes I had taught here and my first jli class I taught we had a uh thank God a beautiful good amount of people and I stood by a Podium teaching do you remember do you remember this I never shared this before I was very uncomfortable I couldn't pinpoint it exactly why and I realized why everybody's sitting and I'm standing and there's just something is not working here I felt like I'm lecturing to a crowd rather than talking with people so for future courses I started sitting maybe it's because I'm short I'm just kidding um this is the real reason um but for future GLI courses I started sitting and I felt like I was able to present the class in a way where I'm having a conversation with you rather than preaching at you you see the difference between standing and sitting when you're standing you're removed when you're sitting you're relaxed you're lowering yourself down you're a little bit more vulnerable when you're sitting down than when you're standing up right what do you do to make somebody comfortable in your home have a seat sit down make yourself at home make yourself comfortable so when we say that God has this chair okay what's supports this chair we'll get to in a second God has a chair this chair is God coming down into our world in a more comfortable way because that's the ultimate purpose of creation that's what the Torah is all about that's what Judaism is all about that was what the giving of the Torah at Mount Si was God coming down to Heaven go sorry God coming down to earth down to this world right that's why God's will is expressed in physical action God says I want to integrate with the physical world that's why Torah law is so detailed and everything is like splitting hairs like everything in Jewish law you know it's it's like a whole you could write books and books on how to open a refrigerator on shabas according to Jewish law right it's like start splitting hair on what happens when you open the thing and what electricity is according to on sh because God wants to integrate within every single detail and fabric of society of existence physically emotionally spiritually he wants to be settled here he doesn't want to be the God in heaven he wants to be part of the world he is part of the world but he wants us to experience that to learn that to dictate that to to to practice that that's God sitting on the chair right God needs to be in this chair for but that that translates into us doing our mission God in the chair God being comfortable in this world and what supports this chair three legs what supports God's presence in this world three legs the three legs are Abraham Isaac and Jacob abak and yov the Ben ish RAB ysf Kim of Bagdad he was the chief Rabbi of Baghdad in the late 1800s he has a commentary on on um on the talmud and specifically the parts of talmud that are um nonak the a theak parts of talud very interesting commentary he incorporates a lot of cabala he himself was a cabalist and he writes that Abraham Isaac and Jacob holding up the chair holding up God God's presence in this world what does Abraham Isaac and Jacob represent those are also euphemisms Abraham was the epitome of kindness that's the channel of kindness Abraham had his four-door tent Abraham would travel the world Abraham felt a responsibility toward inspiring other people with faith in God he was the epitome of benevolence of just giving by the way almost to a fault because you know he he he didn't even want to get isma who was a negative influence on the rest of his family he didn't want to get isma out of the house until God said listen to your wife this ain't working get him out and Abraham ended up listening what is y represent the channel of gura the channel of discipline the channel of restraint the channel of boundaries of you know you didn't never even left the land of Israel he couldn't have left Israel he wasn't able to what does yakob represent Jacob represent tet tet means pride and Beauty the beautiful mixture and blend between Andor kindness benevolence discipline and restraint there has to be a balance when you balance and blend them beautifully you have Yakov because what happens if you're too kind let's let's just say from a parenting perspective because I'm thinking of the Patriarchs as parents from a parenting perspective right Abraham is just too benevolent and it worked he inspired his son y but look at isma right um took the opposite approach a lot of restraint and discipline and focus and scheduled and and it worked he had a beautiful child Jacob but look at his brother his twin ASA who wanted to kill him and then you look at yakob who's able to seamlessly integrate both of these like third level the third leg who's able to integrate both of these channels both of these perspectives and he has 12 tribes of Israel each of them are part of the people of Israel in their own ways and obviously they had their ups and downs and Rifts and there was issues there was a lot of family challenges here but at the end all TW 12 children are one of the 12 tribes that make up the Jewish people not CA not the case with as's lineage and certainly not the case with ishmael's lineage because he was able to blend the two perfectly but you know what God says to Moshe or supposes to Moshe this three leged chair isn't working let's try just with you because what did mosha represent Moshe was the tribe of Levi again the Lees are also gor restraint in contrast to the Coen whose benevolence and kindness and love and and and that's why according to Jewish law Cohen isn't allowed to have a grudge when um when performing the Priestly blessings what's the blessing that a Coen says when giving the blessings they're commanded to bless the Jewish people with love right Aaron who the the patriarch of the Cohen family was the epitome of love and peace but Moshe who a Levi a Ley is the epitome of I'm going to say it like it is I'm going to tell you the truth the facts don't care about your feelings and you know mosha was a man of God not necessarily a man of people and he he was restraint he was disciplined he was gura and God says you know maybe there's too much kindness and too much why don't we focus on this one channel let's rebuild from Moshe not necessarily literally from Moshe just from himself like let's kill everybody but let's focus Judaism on being Moshe focused let's give everybody the truth just say it like it is be straight with people discipline because look what happens we're too laxed they ended up sinning now if I represented a personal Channel a specific channel of whether it be or or whatever it might be kindness or and God God suggested that we follow my channel we follow my way of doing things my personality I'd say I like that idea and mosha had the objectivity and the humility to say God the three-legged chair isn't working you think one is going to work it doesn't work that way mosha was asserting that we need the three legs we need diversity we need diverse approaches we need blends of different ways of doing things the sages point out in the talmud the beauty of the holiday of Shu when we had received the Torah being specifically in the third month the first month was Nissan that's when we had left then the month of er the second month the third month is shivas and it says how beautiful is it that the Torah which is divided into three the tanak right the Torah the prophets the writings given to a nation divided into three Coen Ley is and Isel Israelites are given on the third month there's something unique about three and the L had explained in one of his talks that when you're focus on any one channel it may be correct but it's about what you're comfortable with if my focus or even if I'm focused on two channels but I'm but I'm focused on segmented Paths of serving God it ends up being about what I'm comfortable with or what my personality is not about the truth and Moses was saying we can't have a one-legged service even if it's AED kindness or whatever it is it just doesn't work you need all legs because nobody has everything in their personality and if we can have all of these together then it's not just me doing what is comfortable it's me doing what is true because me doing what is comfortable can lead to all sorts of dark and scary places false things in order for it to be real I got to follow what is necessary for the time not just what is my personality which means sometimes I need to show restraint even though I'm a benevolent type of person or sometimes I need to practice benevolence even though I'm a more restrictive discipline type person right sometimes I got to go out of my box sometimes I need to learn how to blend the two which is the third level and I need to do different things that aren't within my personality we got to go out of our personality the one leged thing ain't working even two legs isn't going to work we need all three legs this is what mosha was asserting to God and we learn from here number one the need to not follow our personality but to follow what is necessary we also learn leadership over here I I want to end off with a cute story talking about leadership um and and going out of our personality to do and and out of our comfort zone to do what's necessary not just to do what's uh what's comfortable even if it's holy sometimes we're doing things that are holy but we're still stuck in our comfort zone and it's important to leave and to go beyond our comfort zone I think the epitome of that by the way is the his personality was quite introverted um he was not known as a people's person prior to that um when the previous Reit had passed away and people were pressing him why don't you become the rebbi and he was getting a lot of pressure and at some point he said to somebody this isn't for me and if you guys don't stop I'm move me and my wife are packing up and moving to an island we're going somewhere else because just this isn't working um but eventually the rabbit made the decision that this is the right this is what was necessary not not even if it wasn't comfortable eventually that becomes comfortable but but here's the story I wanted to tell you a little cute anecdote I was reminded of this because tonight today was the 12th of T the day that the previous was released from prison in communist Russia for sharing the Wellsprings of Judaism when he had come to America so you got a picture this you got a picture Sim T at kabad World Headquarters now kabad World Headquarters wasn't the Kad world headquarters that you've seen that huge room it was just a small building at the time it wasn't yet expanded and it's the small SCH and it's t and it's a couple of and young people and they're dancing and there's one yiva student who wasn't dancing he wasn't getting involved in the dancing of now the excuse of I Don't Dance doesn't like that's not that doesn't work like what does this have to do with you right in Judaism we don't dance for ourselves we dance for a a higher cause to celebrate something higher but what was blocking this student from dancing is new suit you ever do that you get a new article of clothing and for like the first three days you can't move because and then at some point you're like yeah what the heck right so he had this new suit and he couldn't he couldn't do it apparently the previous rabbit took two eggs put it in his pocket and went like this boom says now you can dance right now you can celebrate now you can connect now you can go out of your comfort zone because you were so focused on the discipline right and maybe some people are go overgo and so focused on the right we have to go out of that comfort zone and explore all three legs of that chair okay that's my story and I'm sticking to it