Rabbi Mordechai Kraft - באשר הוא שם In Our Present State

welcome everybody to our Tuesday lunch and learns and thank you for joining in and we'll begin now and today we can talk about a topic really which is something very something very dear to me in a way that's something I'd like to speak a lot about especially now as we get close to Russia Shana you know I think about this topic a lot because you know Rosh Hashanah is a day of judgment and today which is Shem is going to scrutinize us and look at us and examine our past year to determine really what we need for the upcoming year and that that's the purpose of it it's not a day of looking to punish God for this a day to like a CEO word for a company look at the past year determine what do you need for this new year what can I do to to help you in this upcoming year you know that that's why we celebrate the judgments so much we celebrated because it's the opportunity that God is giving us he wants to invest in us and but he needs to scrutinize us and used to look at us and at the same time we have to know that our actions really matter you know the life in this world is a serious thing and we are being looked at so there's a judgment aspect of the judgment which is a little bit a little bit fearful but there's aspect of it and mavis important aspect which is overwhelmingly actually I say just exciting in the sense that we know that it's Shem is going to determine what we need the reality is and it really is a dual emotion on Rosh Hashanah you know when you think about the emotions for different holidays so for example Sukkot is - simple cotton was clearly joy you know Pesach it's clearly joy you know even you know Kippur it's clearly joy you know there's coach Brock was saying just speak to me and and ask for forgiveness and I'll undo and turn sins into Mitzvah but what's what's the emotion of Rosh Hashanah if we think about it what emotion I was striving for you don't on the one hand it's a day in which my life is being in the balance you know what's gonna be this coming years it's life or death like we said in the sonnet oak after its it I was the person gonna live or die they gonna make it through this year you know is it is a day you know what type of health law I have this year what type of Parana so wealth whatever it might be it's everything is really on the line and and so therefore it's it's a degree of a fear at the same time we know the one judging us is a sham who loves us so much is our Father and the purpose of his judgment is in essence to determine what we need to perfect ourselves so therefore how could we not rejoice in that that Hashem wants to look at me that a Shem cares about me he's interested in me so the correct emotion by the way is really what dogged America said w Melek said Gila Baroda rejoice in your trampling it's a very interesting emotion give the buddha under rejoice Gila the Rhondda in trembling like here we have both going on simultaneously I'm Joyce in Belgium loves me so much and interested in me but there's no other there's a degree of concern what's gonna what's gonna be you know and now that we want this year to to be in fact sweet as we ask em for and then have the blessings that we feel are our blessings that we would we would like especially the blessings of health and life and to ourselves or our families but there's another part of the day of the judgement and this is what I really want to talk about today there's another part of judgment in which a chef judges us to see have we lived up to the task of being who he created us to be and maybe that's the the the most I don't know maybe the most disconcerting part of it have we become that person that he created us to be not just as he judging us generally but as he do you see judging you know him he's judging us according to to to the level that that we're gonna really live up to the task of the responsibility of being that unique neshama that unique soul and I think that's a little bit scary to some extent because that means that you really have to look at ourselves and really ask ourselves a question do I know who I am have I discovered what's special about me and and that takes time and that takes work to really dig into ourselves and say do can I come before the Almighty and say yeah I am doing my job I Know Who I am I know my uniqueness I know my specialness I discovered that one quality about myself for that that that those qualities about myself or that something I can give to the world that nobody else can give them you brought - shove it down because you need me if I discovered that that I think is a very scary question because maybe we don't spend enough time really researching that or digging into ourselves enough to say like have I if I discover myself you know so how do we do that I guess we'll have to talk about that a little bit how do we do it but it really means spending time with oneself - and and taking a walk you know and and just by what's with oneself you leave with a cellphone home baby and just trying to go to what sign one's mind and one's heart and really want to solve that respected and saying am i if I figure out who I am now that's gonna be a big part of the judgement and I just want to go through right now a little bit from a a mission in Russia Shana and the mission is a fascinating Mishnah and the Mishnah addresses this question and it doesn't in a very unique way so let me read the mission to you and we know the mission we're talking about the the paragraphs or the work put together by the sea which was time after the destruction of the Second Temple but due to the prince really took the old law and compiled it to accomplish diode which is very much a way of sort of condensing their old law in some sort of written form so we have access to it we won't forget it but the same time it's very much in all tradition if you don't have the Talmud the Camaro which flushes it out it's very cryptic I'm gonna read you from one of the mission I owed in Rosh Hashanah and again there's a cryptic part of this Mishnah there's a hidden part of this Mishnah which is is so important and so revealing so let me read what it says it says but our boat rocking about all the meat off four times the world four times a year the world is judged but pets allowed to vote out of what they stock the world's judge regarding produce be at Sarat and revolt and the payroll to Elan and the fruits of the tree but Rosh Hashanah and Rosh Hashana quote by autumn all of the father's when I borrow the entire world passes before him like Bonet my wrong but name our own funny word the word Binet my wrong what does that mean good name I will talk about in a moment shouldn't that Mars it says into Hillel hey yo Tzu Yahud Lee Beom the one who created their hearts together I made you know c'mon say him and understands to what extent all their actions reach will be cut and I'm Sukkot they don't need my love mine and so called the world's judge regarding water this is the mission in Russia shot of the first mission Rosh Hashanah so again the world's judging for tank periods let's not discuss Pesach now we won't discuss Shavuos or our circus you know Pesach for grains and show us for for fruit and and suck us for water the world's judge regarding how much will be in the world of these very important commodities but let's speak about Russia shine the mission that interrupts in the middle and it changes form it says Russia Shana it doesn't say the world's judge regarding man it says a very interesting language and Russia Shama called bio all of all of the fun of cabin tomorrow the entire world passes before him like Bonet morong so most people translated Sofia sheep will offer interesting translations Shen de Mars a sense in the in Sam's a yoke so yaha liebe the one who creates their hearts together how baby no Hamas a him and understands to extent to what extent other actions reach its extending from King David all hearts are together yella Shem understands to what extent the actions of each individual reaches and that seems to be the proof text or the the text that that that fits the word Binet Marone perfectly the entire world passes before a sham or the court the sleigh of Shem like Binet Morano what is beneath my Romney so let's just look at the the the Talmud in in chocolate brush Hashanah and you took us on the Olive 18 folio a ask the question what's his bit name around me and it offers three opinions so you know we say three rabbis four opinions here we have an example of that we have three rabbis three opinions it says what has been a means reading for the Talmud here we translate tog giemo the first translation of the Talmud says it says cooping a I'm run though the first opinion the top so you know what name our own means well let's look at the Aramaic translation the simple arithmetic translation of I'm runnin meat sheep so the first translation means on Rosh Hashanah we pass leave for God like sheep what does that mean that we pass before God like sheep according this first translation you know I guess sheep in the language of the Talmud are always associated with the lack of individuality and if you look at sheep sheep are very docile expression sheep to the slaughter as we utilize not correctly but if about used to the Holocaust it's not true but it required all ways implies to certain facility and a certain saying this jeeps are not individuals they follow the shepherd they follow like they follow the sheepdog whenever the Talon wants to speak about things that have individuality those speaks about dogs by the way goats are very listicle jump all over the place do whatever they want to do that's why many communities have laws you can't have goats in here and you tablet you thought everything but sheep are followers so the first opinion says be name our own means like she's been in fact that's the way it's translated I believe when we read in the sonnet okay santoku visit the kedusha and it talks about who will live and who will die we get here we almost that very plaintiff the plaintiff played prayer and then that's where the constant always says it's emotionally who by firing my sword but the word is that we go before shem I've been in my rowing and and the implication there is like sheep so sheep is the vision of sameness now that's interesting it means that the first opinion the top and says I'm Rosh Hashana we're gonna be judged all the same now that's true to what some extent there are there aspects of being a Jew that we all have in common for example when it's Friday night and this week is gonna be what is to be 6:30 for Africa exact time it's gonna be Shabbos Shabbat here in New York so David that was those for you here in New York not in Bolivia so it's it's it we all know that exactly at that time well we do exact same thing the Sun is gonna set and we're in Shabbat we're in Shabbos so it's there's a sameness to that when Chavez comes in we're going to do the same things Friday night lighting candles we're gonna make in Kadosh how we keep Shabbat is gonna be very similar we're all gonna be careful about the laws of Bora we're all gonna be careful about you know about the laws official but cooking separating we're all gonna be sitting down at the Taylor our tables Friday night and having a meal and Chavez still having a meal so that should be sheet we're all gonna be diving the center-field on for there's a lot of sameness kashrut there's a lot of sameness will all commanded them can't mix milk and meat that we can we can't we have to eat from only from an animal that that's shepherdess love in a certain way that the blood has been taken properly this salting when suka comes around we're all gonna be enjoying to take a little uh Vanessa Logan and we have many things which we have in common there is gonna be a sheep like judgement on Rosh Hashanah to what extent have you followed that which God gave for all of us to do there are 613 mitzvot 2048 pounds of command throughout 65 so we call negative Commandments and many of them apply to us those that apply to us we need to do those our thought is we don't need to do can't do everything without Kings it's like this we're gonna do what men need to do things like that but it's whatever we're supposed to be doing we're supposed to all be doing those things so a sheep judgment as a sheep means guys to the same look as to what extent have you kept that Torah which I've given to you which you're all obligated in but you know if we stop there and we submit is that the only level of judgment that that I'm judged like a sheep I think something wouldn't revolt inside of ourselves I think there would be a feeling that I know that I'm more than a sheep I feel inside myself that there's a uniqueness about Who I am there's some there's an individuality who I am I feel that we sensed that and we internalize we know that in fact you know I think one of the greatest insult you give somebody is disabled person you like everybody else sometimes they say the use the word cookie cutter you know you just come for the same Bowl - just like everyone else nothing special about you that's such a massive insult because the untruth of it cuts to the core of our being and the core of our being tells us that I know that I'm different just please recognize my specialness recognize my you Kadota my individuality just see there's something special about me and if nobody could recognize that we feel lost we feel we feel totally you know kesh matter who's saying it it just just destroyed and and and the greatest please look sometimes ghost right you could give to somebody is to go over the southern Irish I want to tell you about yourself by I'm so pressed by you who you are what you just said how you said it like wow you're so special you know sometimes you do that if you let a person know who they are it's such an amazing sense of strength you give them a giving you can't imagine how much you can do for a person when you do that because our individuality is what drives us today there's a there's a unique ishyama that says just just know me recognize me see me so if if Benigno wrong means were just like sheep I don't know so what about individuality like I'm not a sheep I know I have midslope that we all have to do but like you know we're all so different you know maybe so it's interesting the second there's another thing in the Talmud reish lakish fish luckily she says now you know up the name Marone means it means like the ascent to bait my rom compiled of big Marlin Mo's big Marlin bait Mallard big Marlin was a narrow mountain path in the north of Israel and it was a place that you could only pass through that mountain pass one at a time so what's very lucky say he's saying no what did wasn't able to judge like Boone am I wrong don't traits don't translate banana on a sheet translated Binet from the word Milo bigmar on that narrow mountain path in the north of Israel where you have to go for one at a time in other words what's rich luggage telling us I'm rushing shot here gonna be done one at a time wasn't it one at a time one at a time you're gonna be judged as an individual you're gonna be judged for who you are I mean God is gonna look at us and say to what extent have you lived up to be that person that I created you to be that's what it means to be judged one at a time now okay that's a little bit scarier in the sense that do I Know Who I am like I've I've thought about have I got it to myself it and and and said and I asked myself a question away mine what makes me different what makes me special no I have a question for everybody and I'm just gonna put it out there right now it seems to be obvious that the higher level judgment here is to be judged as individuals that certainly strikes more of a court in who we are you know even we know that that what God gave the Ten Commandments for example it's all written the second person for example it says I know clear Shemin a little I'm ashamed you're God the Aloha means I taught you the second person it doesn't say well okay you're God and they pull you it says here the Seldon note it sucks you shall not murder it's all in the second person as if the God said I'm speak to each and every one of you individually because you have to see yourself as if I'm talking to you because you're not just part of a big group you have your own uniqueness of specialness and that seems to be intuitively the higher level of understanding and judgment and surely touches a deeper part of who we are that were more than sheep to be a sheep as is is how can i how could I live in such concept I'm just a sheep no I mean individual I'm going through one at a time so question everybody why didn't do the Prince you the Nazi when he wrote this mission up why did he have to use the words been a but never wrong well the first opinion the Talmud says well the Aramaic translation is is given a Amuro know what you mean cheap it's only rich luxury just to come in and says now don't read it as sheep read it as my little pig mahram the narrow mountain paths path called baked Meryem why didn't you the Prince human I see we wrote this Mishnah why they simply say I'm Russia Shana we're gonna be judged as individuals a little bit judged to what extent we lived up to the task of being that special unique soul that God brought down to this world what again simply why did you the principally say that why did he use a word that seems to have both connotations it's a word which you could interpret both ways why is he who does not see seemingly purposely being so cryptic so hidden in that word st. straight rushes out of your judge doesn't individual why is it word that applies both sheep and individual just say who I really am I need you really judge to what extent used up the task of being you I'd like to offer something that the marathas then I'll be proud and the mob Leapfrog that we know he could have LOI frog it won't look the great scholar of the the 16th century basically all this is accentuated pride brother the greatest philosophical thinkers that we've had the last 400 years and his thinking and thoughts and writings are are very comprehensive expansive and so beautiful they're all asked this question and he offers such an intriguing answer and he says that had it's simply written now Rosh Hashana were judged like sheep well that would destroyed self-esteem never destroy we are and it's not true yet had he written had the author of the Mishnah written on Rosh Hashanah we're gonna be judged as individuals there's a danger in that an immense danger what's that danger the danger is as follows the need to be an individual the need to be unique is so powerful in the human being that a person might want to jump to that uniqueness but not realizing that in order to really be unique there has to be a structure and a pattern to build a pot they explained me a little bit supposing a person says that they want to find a cure for cancer so he sets a wonderful wonderful ambition hope you succeed what's your plan my plan I'm gonna go into my basement and I have a chemistry set and I'm just gonna take my chemistry set out and we get some books and go online and start researching and try to find that cure we look at that person we'd say like don't waste your time you really want to find a cure for cancer you've is about do something noble for the world and something so healthy and helpful for the world is productive for mankind so the way to do it is well first you got to spend four years in college and perhaps major in biology and then you have to go to medical school and then after medical school perhaps you have to do an internship after internship you have to do some sort of maybe fellowship and then after that maybe get involved in some sort of research and then perhaps maybe after 14 years of investing yourself in the structure of medicine and in the wisdom of those who came before you maybe you'll find something at the top of the iceberg and you'll be able to say maybe we can see it like this maybe we can move it that way maybe I can understand it a little bit like this and all of a sudden guess what happens a discovery is made and something productive it come to the world I think we'd all agree that's the only way that something real can exist if it builds on something which is a platform which has a structure you know in art it's as simple as also this is very similar concept that you know if a person says you're like I want to be a modern artist I want to go and I want to express myself I don't want to use form a structure I just want to do it in a way which defies all all type of convention so most people who would say that I think would produce work which is probably not worth looking at except maybe by mother or somebody but other than that it's gonna be several waste of the viewers time I've never said anyone who really has done well in modern art is somebody who spent many years son cadential art let's draw landscapes and learning to draw shapes and and then to draw the human being and learn to draw nature in a very exact way and once he mastered that then they were able to fake it I could ship by I differently and see the world a little bit askew but still create something which is so pleasing to the mind and to the eye to the heart I think you'd agree that that's the only way that one could produce really really good modern art all right even in music and you're the person assessing of that they want to Christmas of modern music and the really good musicians those especially those were the feel of jazz and things like this of those who are those who really are very good and in finding creative types solos or things like that are really the best ones or those who really have a classical training studied classical music I understand structure understand time they understand music understand pattern understand theme understand just understand the way music works and from within the system they can create something new and really pleasing it to the ear even if might not be so totally in line with Western ideas but it's still beautiful because it's it's coming from a system that came before it and it's fitting patterns that really work so if that's true for medicine it's true for ours is true for music people forget something and this is what the morrow brings out and this is the major inside of you know enough to do to the prince that in the desire of a human being to want to be that unique and special individual they're going to forget that the only way to be unique and special is to stand on a platform that allows them to grow and develop into the spiritual world the world of self-development which is the spiritual world that means the platform of the Torah it means the platform of that which is common for us all it means a platform of the 613 mitzvot he's the platform of doing those things which we all have to do for example one we keep Shabbat what are we doing it's true or commanding it but it's creating a mindset that there's a spiritual essence in this world there's a creator it creates a mindset not only is it creator but he loves him he is interested in me and that motivates me to try to achieve something when we're all keeping cash roots it creates a certain worldview that I'm more than a body I'm a soul and if I can't just put anything in my body of his soul that has to have food that's that's that's that's correct for the Jewish soul it can't be a mixture of milk and meat there's a cruelty in that and that's gonna hurt my soul so the platform that's common for us all it's a platform and once we've mastered that platform oh we're standing on it and we're getting up every morning and we're doffing and we're saying there is a creator I'm speaking to him and I need them and I have a soul that that wants to connect to him and I'm making a blessing over food and I'm recognizing yes everything in this life isn't in this world is invested with a spiritual component and everything I do matters and then I'm doing acts of precedent kindness by the Torah asks for a stir for me to give sadaqa to see the divine nature another human being and therefore not to speak Russian are about that person and be so careful the way I treat that person when I give to that person I do for that person once I develop that pattern God's I said well have you kept the structure but that once you're in the pattern you have that platform so to speak you're mastering a spiritual approach to life then from that platform can you discover something which is unique to you you see if a person's gonna jump in say I just want to be unique I want to be special I want to be different they're gonna be something very superficial it's like the guy who's gonna sandwich I've cure for cancer but I wanna skip medicals a Jew says I want to be unique it's special yeah I stood mastering the guidelines of what it means to live a spiritual life what it means to be a life connected to Hashem and everything that I do I want to master the wisdom of the way God lives and the way God acts and what God wants for me and from that wisdom I could find that area well this is what I can contribute this is what I'm good at this is what I could do but without that all good those create something very superficial and very shallow and that's not what God is interested in and there's you know in in an army you know army doesn't mean privates these officers to be an officer you have to have a specialty you have to know really what you are about you have to know platform would you stand you know I give you that example what I mean you know this is a stripe of the funny story a little bit when I was in college so I was in Amsterdam at one point and I remember I was in the train station in Amsterdam and a guy comes over to me and he says to me were you from and I said New York and he said all this nice I said where are you from and he looks at me he said no where as I said I know where that what you mean nowhere i was like 'hey interesting they said to me have you ever looked at planet Earth for the outer space I said no I haven't he said well if you were to look at planet Earth outer space you would notice something that you would not see Geographic division between countries you'd see one connected contiguous planet you want to see a separation between France and Belgium and Germany and Italy you wouldn't see the connection between Poland and Russia it would be one whole world he said what right do we have to divide the world up into artificial segments said the world is connected and United so therefore I'm not gonna say that I'm from somewhere I'm really from nowhere which means I'm from everywhere that's receptive I said wow that's really very beautiful I thank you for sharing that very interesting philosophy with me then he said to me well it just says do you think you'd spare $10 a little shorter it's the end of the conversation I realized you can have the most beautiful philosophy in the world and you could have the strongest desire to do something we just totally unique and different and special but where's lead you can life at least either asking college students for $10 and train stations so uniqueness has to grow and has to emerge from a foundation of a connected spiritual place and that's the tour offers us so what julep produces teaching us is such a magnificent idea that the author of this Mishnah you do the prince the sooner the varas explaining it to us but I'll explain I'll explain the mission to us as follows said that you are nothing purposely wrote it in a way where Binet Marone leads to things he used a word that has two implications so it's not like the first appeal argue with the second opinion the second is are in the first opinion the first opinion is one aspect of an Emer on which is sheep the second opinion is well let's take that aspect now refine it even further and Judith Prince purposely used the word as to connotations because there's a danger in writing just one of them for example if you said I'm not trying to judge like sheep that's a danger we're destroying myself both sets himself into drowning if you said I rush to China where judges individuals I might think I can jump to be an individual without first having to be a sheep I have to be a sheep first to be the individual so use the word that means both of them and for both of the ones supposed to go through an intellectual exercise and say I understand what you mean you're using a word that has both connotations because there's a part of it that does have any sheep in order to become that you need I need to be other words he couldn't choose a word that just says you're a sheep destroyed two morality and he couldn't you say good Russian judges an individual because the person will judge junk through the individual but will forget that they've been individual you have to do it with a structure of a spiritual approach to this world which is to a structure that trains us how to look at God and know that he exists is real to look another human being and know that he exists and he's real in that human being I think that we look at ourselves that there's a soul inside of ourselves that's what it was training us train is the spiritual sense of who I am once I know that then I could find my real inner essence but I don't have that platform what I find is going to be very superficial and so out of the box is probably leaving nowhere but again the word implies both it's interesting by the way there's a third opinion in the Mishnah rabbuna says the name is small no don't read like that what does it mean read Marone as Maros meaning sovereignty and lordship or like an army and Russia Shani or the judge be judged as part of an army that's the third opinion what does that mean well what's the purpose of an army an army is everybody working together for you to find goal so that seems to be the end result take your cheapness I have a spiritual approach to life discover your uniqueness and then place and put your uniqueness into the army of God into the Jewish nation and all working together all utilize our unique this together we can bring the world where it needs to go that seems to be the final stage but then it's descent questions we ask them the first two parts if that seems to be the ultimate goal why didn't you - the prince when he wrote the Misha simply say on Russia Shah know you're gonna be judged to what extent you fulfill your mission in this army called the Jewish nation and the answer would be in a person's desire to so serve the army there's such a there's a calling inside of us there's a feeling every peon being that I want to be part of the big I want to contribute but in our desire to contribute we will forget that my contribution is really only of value if I first develop myself and of course to develop oneself one needs to have that spiritual platform so sure the prince uses a word Binet morrow which means sheep it means on that mountain path individuality and it means morose which means an army the same word three nuances the three opinions the tablet are arguing with each others not three Robi three opinions each one is giving a more advanced a heightened vision of God's judgment it has to start with sheep it has to lead to individuality and individuality has to lead to what extent I'm applying myself to this greater picture called the Jewish people so in his brilliance he uses a word which meets all three because the same brush sense will be judges part of the army I say okay I want to serve the army but you know like if we could take medicine as a metaphor person said I want to serve and I want to help people I want to heal so I want to just take a medics course and be a paramedic nothing more than being a paramedic but maybe that person had the potential to be a great surgeon through researching I've spent time and study and devote yourself to it you know in the rabbinic field there are many people who say you know I really want to substitute people earn a year or two and you go I'll go out I'll make a difference people's lives I would say to such people you know that's a beautiful motivation but if you really want to make a people the lion to make a different lines of Jews you have to spend a number of years looking get to devote yourself seven ten then Yakama beyond 14 years devote yourself to really gaining the wisdom of the time I think you can make a difference in the world you need to develop yourself first to be a value they are in a very significant way not that that any value say anything is not a value but to really discover our uniqueness it takes time and then we can serve the army so again the word Marone the name iran has all three connotations because to write one without the other this is the word tomorrow would be a tragic error if it said sheep destroying the morality everything individuality I figured I first have to be a sheep and if it said you're gonna be judged to what extent you're part of the army I would so desire to be part of the army I forget that to be part of the army I have to develop myself first and develop myself first a little platform of spirituality so the word means all three things that's the brilliance of that word been am I wrong the Mishnah and the truth is as Shep is going to be judging us on all three levels of masterchef have we kept that which is common for us all and we living as Jews were supposed to live we all have the same bits for our we do it properly the work that was standing properly but then guys had a look at us and say what about you have you discovered yourself and it did I created you to be somebody different they spent time reflecting okay nice and number three we're gonna be judged to what extent we utilizing those special unique talents we have in order to contribute to this beautiful glorious picture called the Jewish people all three are gonna be part of the judgmental Shoshana now it doesn't mean that we discover who we are and we just know who we are and it's not always so simple to find our uniqueness and I just want to give a few maybe a few hints to how a person might discover that uniqueness so number one there's need to spend time with oneself and and enjoy one's own company the degree to which really one enjoys one's own companies really degree to which one really has their own inner sense of self first doesn't like being alone it means the person's doctorly in touch with who they are but should enjoy time alone enjoy time driving in the car and just being able to think taking a walk she bought this a beautiful time for this in our modern world number two a very interesting concept that the areas in our life where we think what we'd like to be successful if we feel like failures often times is a key that that's a place that supposed to try to perfect myself why is that it's because in a place that we have a ruts on where we have a a desire that desire is coming from a very holy place desire in general ruts on a will to to do good and to to to really be something cos it's from a very holy part of the soul and if we feel like a failure in that area it means that there's a gate Sahara they get so hard stopping us that the it's our hearts trying to suppress our ability to succeed there however the it's our heart is trying to suppress our going to succeed there it's indication it's because we have tremendous potential there so I think it's very important to monitor those areas of one's life where one wants to succeed especially the spiritual activity yet one feels that I'm not going to succeed there's a voice that says you're feeling you're never gonna make it there that's indication that the s are speaking to you there and that you have a great potential you know I just have just on a personal note that you know I remember my many years and learning in yeshiva I had a voice in the back of my head that would always seem to speak a language of of your who do you think you are to be a teacher of Torah that you're gonna be a failure usually try to teach each other that's not who do you know you're gonna fail as a rabbi as a teacher that don't try I heard that voice repeatedly and looking back in retrospect and looking at my own life's work which is really in teaching tired I think that perhaps the eighth Sahara was hitting me in my self in the area where I had potential for personal expression where I had the potential to be who I'm supposed to be you know just you know the flip side is you know that I don't know if those would play basketball right I've never heard a voice in my head saying you know you're never gonna play basketball like LeBron James I've never heard that boys why because the answer doesn't need to work on me there because it's self-evident that that's not going to happen but where you are supposed to be who you are that's what the eights are hits so monitor the areas of one's life where one wants to succeed but what feels like a failure that were three the whole time right welcomes time rights monitor the areas that one feels a certain attraction to certain the Tia pull towards you know might be in whatever it might be it's are the acts of kindness or certain myths folk are certain there's a certain that touches you particularly that's a pull the sole saying that that's an area where you're supposed to have a degree of self perfection the valar gone rights in the other way around that would probably say something very very esoteric we'll probably won't Gil ghulam in this world today well brought back for to fix ourselves up reincarnated souls coming back to correct something about ourselves so usually we're trying to correct is the area that we failed in in the previous time around in this world so it's interesting the places in our life that are difficult things that we have a struggle with instead of giving up on that and saying that's not for me that might be exactly where were supposed to try to perfect ourselves we were brought back in the world to fix up that part of ourselves but we didn't perfect before and maybe our individual unique this is gonna be expressed in developing that area so I guess my own humble opinion we have to take all of these into consideration and we have to think like the cop says and focus on the areas that made a natural material traction towards easy for we have to look at the areas that the Vilna Gaon points out that are difficult for us to do maybe that's the area we have to try to perfect we have to exam and that part of ourselves will be affiliated so hard speaking and say you're gonna fail because that's oftentimes education that's what we can succeed and of course we have to spend time with ourselves and and just have a dialogue with ourselves and get to know ourselves a little bit better and really ask ourselves that question what am I supposed to be and ask a chef of course for help in coming up to that understanding ask a job for wisdom and guidance and seeking that answer but we have to discover it we have to know it and that's really what is Jones asking of us it's gonna be such an important part of the day of Rosh Hashanah and I think it's such an inspirational concept to understand that there is a uniqueness in who we are and God really wants us to express it and God really wants us to pick it out I wish everybody a a wonderful new year a healthy new year a year in which you fulfill all the dreams of your heart be sharply back the Tov and a year in which we get the wisdom to understand what our uniqueness is and the wisdom to know how we can utilize that uniqueness to help the Jewish people and to help make this world the world that God wants it to be I wish everybody not told