Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser: Mastering Free Will 2.2

character traits yeah courageous keep going guys confident conviction so we'll call it self generated because we spoke about that earlier okay software what kind of like they were saying the two participants that they're self-aware ever they realize their souls okay self-aware what else we got good strong [Music] what else what else no no we need character trans rebellious a character train mmm no we're taking what would it take to be real what's the character will hmm okay and willful that's part of strong kind of any others yeah inner peace okay that's part of self generating but uh I'll be kind inner peace it's more but that's more the feeling you get yeah that's what you get yeah I don't know I feel like that's it only works if Y is a good thing but you can really done that Y is a good thing nothing about if wise it is he didn't just go off and become like a neo-nazis he's added to his or her life in some way that's that's big enough that it's affecting others any others what ruin it okay ruin it these look pretty good that's the right word that's usually a negative what when we say committed you see how committed fits there to stay away okay open well there we're open enough to become a why their own enough to go check it out open up to becoming okay everyone did really well you missed the number one one we just fine I've never taught this where the group got it so you're doing great okay um but I love dropping the bomb later it's a lot of fun as a teacher are you still want a guess whenever I usually even have to spell it like it slowly told people couldn't catch on as a spelling off just leave the lumps okay here we go imagine when like I flew to Jerusalem MIT ruff North Weinberg life heard about Tara proofs of God you know its discovery program and you know the torah's divinity and I'm like I was totally why and I fly back to the US where you know my basically reform or conservatives relatives and you know they're all just doing ever they want and they and and I come in like turbo jus you know I would didn't have these but you know I was gonna keep uh and I got my cosmic dental flaws then I'm just like hava nagila you know and there and eating kosher and you know I had to go to a family event I'm like eating my own little weird or whatever and do you think like my do you think like my Beverly Hills family came up to me and said like like wow that mango st. John yeah Wow John it's just amazing you are so courageous and confident full of conviction self-generated self-aware as strong and willful rooted committed and open you just must be full of inner peace is that what she said no yeah I remember the conversation it was like it was like you were in a really weak place I get that you were you were really in a weak place and you were you were you were suffering and it makes sense that you you found something because coming from that like insecure place you were at like yeah I get it meanwhile I was like I was like Arnold Schwarzenegger you know like keeping kosher in Beverly Hills and I was just like you know super Jew you know like like keeping Shabbos you know where nobody's giving Chavez and I'm like dealing Chavez you know and it was like it was taking every last bit of moral strength and character that I had to be able to do it and that was the interaction you were weak you get where I'm at now that's the attack but then we go to the number one word what's the number one word what belongs up there sure okay I'm not writing anymore until we get the word because if he was here that means I'm late whoa hey we're gonna spell it yeah let's get let's cut to the chase why integrity because it comes from the word into creation you want a definition those are taking notes was almost nobody but you want a definition of integrity integrating what you know with who you are think about if you tell a thief how bad it is to steal until he can repeat the reasons and then you watch him on a camera a surveillance camera enough co-op sorry in a shop and you see him steal what does he lack integrity doesn't integrate it he says yes I get it I realize these are the reasons why and then he goes in steals that is a person that lacks integrity so again the definition of integrity is when you integrate what you know with who you are if I plug this phone into my home stereo the whole system works for my phone now it will integrate the sound the songs the amplifier the wires the speaker wires the speakers everything gets it gets integrated into the system you know rhyme the words are if it's true it's you if it's true it's you and you become a why but the sad thing is is that and I get to see this sometimes and I hate to see it is when someone actually thinks they're gonna make it as an Y in X land and they don't necessarily on a scale one to ten they don't get a ten on all these character traits what happens is they start developing an appendage and they slowly like become an X and sometimes when I'm traveling I'll be in a class you know I'm teaching a class a couple hundred people wherever Vegas Seattle Washington LA wherever there's a big crowd of people don't just notice I recognized some guy in the back who used to be a yeshiva boy at here at age I knew him when he was or Sameach her Birds a woman who was got all turned on to Judaism wound up in seminary and there she is in the back of the class in pants and a t-shirt and and you know and she's come back because she really wants to talk after the class and get a little strength but there are many people who get worn down and they developed that appendage and they're back to X so you got to really know you got to know when you're ready rabbi Ellis and I hope you teach in the next class on what what's that class huh yes so he's gonna be teaching class called in pursuit of pleasure but the two of us can tell you that we have seen a direct correlation for how long someone spends in the Shiva or in Sam how long they spend in Israel with whatever newfound worldview they've gotten which may be just a different way of looking at their Yiddish guide even if they're raised observant but we could cap we could just tell you after years and years of teaching that if they leave too soon if they leave before they've integrated and then they go back to where they're from a little too early so then they eventually develop that appendage because people don't know what it's gonna take it's really nice you feel inspired while you're in your Shiva or Sam in Jerusalem but you need time with it you need to integrate it integration takes time you got to live it you got to walk it got to be it and and it could be for some people they should never be there you know I probably should never have been after I found Judaism I probably should never have been in West LA West Los Angeles and I never did go back besides visiting my family but it wouldn't have been appropriate because it's a fish out of water it's a salmon swimming upstream it's a it's constantly being in the wrong environment for your growth and so and so I listened to my rabbis when I was a young whippersnapper here at Asia Terra and and you know what they told me they said if your parents had any idea cuz my parents wanted me back in LA if they had any idea what they stand to gain by you staying here they would chain you to the distance to your yeshiva table to study Torah it's just that they don't get it they weren't here experiencing all this and that was enough to know that I'll do it for my parents I'll stay and that's why I'm standing up here and you're sitting there cuz because I listened to my rabbis I didn't do it my way I wouldn't let I've less everybody that today's installment and mastering freewill that you all get the courage to reevaluate your lives so that so that you can live a life you love and happy healthy from the sole domain rabbi Ellis I imagined there might be some bathroom stops I went really late today I'm sorry five-minute break