Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser: Practical Spirituality 1/27/19

shut up and welcome to the possible you that's the name of my seminar Ellen welcome to practical spirituality or in the Old City of Jerusalem in Asia or overlooking the Temple Mount happy to have everyone here and happy whoever's watching this online wherever you watch it and just make a broth of both nod a knife and they a new mayor enum shy Haku me a bit bow so the world works in interesting ways this world out here the physical world is is basically a holographic projection a physical dimension that is that is just a thin membrane of the outer of a long long process that takes place where light becomes matter so in physics that's called it's called theoretical physics is is the work of daniel key move to that side theoretical physics is how how light they're trying to describe how light energy becomes matter and it's full of theories because there's no way to know that you can only theorize such things but we have Kabbalah and Kabbalah teaches us exactly how light becomes matter and the way it works simply and as I've shown a million times on this board is just like this light is this light is shining down and I blocked the light so then you get matter you get you get an actual image on the board it's not a 3d image because of the nature of this setup but but the way you get an image is by is by obscuring life when you obscure life well you get images on the other side and the entire creation is made of what's called the or anus of the the light of the infinite which God causes to shine into creation and then that via these worlds that God filters out that light so that we can be here right now but that's what's really going on I mean that's going on all the time your souls they're only a thin membrane of your soul is actually in this room present to this class and meaning your soul has five levels and those five levels also exist in these parallel ribs the top realm is called the Adam Kadmon and then there's a level call that sealers and there's a level called Berean and let me call it seiran there's level called sia and we are in the level of Asiya here with our bodies but in Asiya it's got multiple levels and you don't want to get trapped in some of those levels those levels are until you're in this level where you're not really trapped you're just kind of here for a while may you all live long then you're just here for a while to see how well you can do with mitzvos because we're all here to do mitzvahs in this world and that's that's kind of the point now anyway the but the five levels the soul is there's the ajita that's one with god that's the feeder which connects to the world called autumn cosmo then you have a then you have a higher which connects to the world of sealless then you have a neuroma which connects to Berea then I Ruach which connects to you Syrah and and then the kind of connects for the Yeats are like your Yeats the Ruach the wind because sometimes it's blown you in different directions that's the world of Yudhisthira and and then the final ones Asiya I see as a our world but we're at the very bottom of Asiya and so your soul comes down a sea a dynasty and denisita and then right about where the little white is on my pinky fingernail that's where US ki usb-cable plunk plops plunks locks into your neurons your cerebral cortex he's telling you're that little membrane of yours you know that you're hearing English right now that the temperature is the temperature the feeling of your clothing on your body there on your skin that the the site of your eyes all of that is is being reported to that thin little membrane it's funny how attached we get to not even that thin membrane it's amazing how attention get to the actual mind which are actual minds because like for example my I'm traveling this Thursday night for two weeks and and I'm also I'm leading a lot a lot of things and meeting every single day I'm gone major events I'm starting with a thousand people for Shabbos and then I'm bringing like 15 businessmen to Costa Rica where I'm in charge of all the programming that they're coming with me on this crazy journey into the rain forests jungles of Costa Rica and then I'm coming back to lead another probably 80 people on very intensive possibly you seminar journey so my mind can go there and I just immediately get short of Wrath nervous anxious and and what's happening there is this is now and that's like next week and the week after and what happens is they don't like it's like a drawbridge they can all just dump on now and that's that's the source of anxiety anxieties where the future lands on now and that's why it's important for anyone having that feeling is to take a deep breath and say I can always handle now try that deep breath together I can always handle now I can always and now none of the sim girls did it because they're just who knows what some up most of their arms across so they're like prank coming off some gateshead type rabbi then they don't know what to do with me exactly so let's try it again and we'll just keep doing it until they all say it I can hand what I say I can handle I can always handle now inhale I can always one more time this time touching your elbow I can always handle now okay and yeah and it's really true it's really true so so what happens is we get doubly hijacked cuz one look wait we get hijacked is our overthinking meaning we get trapped in the thoughts as opposed to the being the awareness of our thoughts cuz are you all aware that you're aware are you aware that your way not I'm saying now are you aware that your rate is that one in this room aware that they're aware for sure so that's two different awareness its meaning is the awareness that's got me as an object to the front of the room speaking so there's an object you have your brain collecting the info then that's one awareness but you're also aware that you're aware of that that's the little membrane of the fingernail that's the nefesh and so you it's really important that grab that as often as possible so you don't get hijacked by the thoughts which as I said before I generally lead to anxiety and so and so being aware of your awareness is the is the access to the soul know how much of your soul that little thin membrane which is point zero zero zero zero zero nine percent of who you are on this eternal spiritual reincarnation cycle system you're on meaning 99.9999% of you is is already dead end point zero zero zero zero zero or one percent of you as that thin membrane Mazel Tov you're already dead just kidding the your so that's just a little party and that's why it's it's important to recognize that you're already dead because if you recognize you're already dead then meaning most who's already in the spiritual world so then you're you're much more likely to stay focused on the majority of you which is the vast majority of you you're gonna make your decisions based on that and you'd be really silly to make all your decisions based on like us you know stopping out a rest stop that had a 7-eleven with Slurpees and like making your whole life around the Slurpee sand like everyone's waiting for you in the car and they find you and they're selling like lounge chairs at that gas station and you're chilling an allowance shirt you know and your family comes in and says what are you doing you're just slurping a little Slurpee and a lounge chair at a restaurant on the side of a highway and what are you doing it and you're like this is it there's this final stop for me have a great trip you know and but that's the way most of us ours we're really really attached to this world it's also it makes a lot of sense also in this world is too is that there's a certain you can actually practice with death and it's called the ego death because what's the hardest thing and dying it's not the body part it's the ego part every one of us think of it we're all gonna lose everything we ever have and half you young people never even built anything yet I mean you're just like one giant question mark you look like a fetus you're like a question mark and what meaning seriously who are you gonna marry we're gonna live what are you gonna make money how many kids you're gonna have what's gonna it's like question mark after question mark after question American question mark and then what's gonna happen during the next ten years is you're gonna create the question mark you're gonna like send it to a chiropractor or something and it's gonna become exclamation points this is one Mary this is where I'm living this is what I'm doing for a living there's how many kids I'm gonna have business with a city I'll be in like all these exclamation points no smart thing to do is attach yourself to Tara because otherwise when you turn about 50 all your exclamation points become question marks again sorry 40s in your 40s all your exclamation points they like revert back to question marks and so you got to watch out for that it's very interesting to watch Polly - I've been watching all my faults you have friends or all in their 40s now and they're all my votes here my friends are like you know they're all like they're all kind of regressed back to like meditation and and all that meaning it's not a regression obviously Jewish Judaism's deep in meditation but they're like many of them are like I mean they just all they want is craft beer and cannabis you know and it's like didn't you come from there like 30 years ago and they're like yeah and so it's kosher yeah and they're and so they're but they're back you know like with a vengeance you know they're buying four-wheel drive trucks and and there isn't it got money now you know they're at the part of the line they're running businesses they can afford all this stuff so they're like so thank you meanwhile their kids are just like whoa dad you know because their kids are raising your shiva's with black attitude and like you know the kids like what's going on with mom and dad so bug cheer was also become a bit of a question mark later but but if you really attach yourself to Tara so then and make that your exclamation point it can survive any midlife crisis in your 40s and 50s you make Tara you just drive those stakes drive your tent stakes into Tara yeah like they like that the tablets that were engrave and like engrave your heart creating raving of your relationship to Tara and you are saving yourself a lot of money and heartache heartache if you know you know in the secular world they wind up usually having an affair or something but money is like a harley-davidson was a lot safer than a fare believe it or not but the but the by driving your stakes into Tara your you're going to stay true to your decisions that you made as a torrid person so you want to really drive those stakes in deep and and don't wind up don't wind up with a bunch of question marks later which is really lame and and in the end death becomes a no brainer because because your your if you're into Tara you're already half there I mean you're you're spending your life doing things that have eternity and you're minimizing the time you have to do that's like temporal like things like eating or going to the bathroom work you got to make a living but those are temporal things and you minimize that as times and you maximize your eternity choices and and after a while you build yourself quite a spiritual realm but it's a totally different I don't know if you guys are getting this but there's a very different perspective on afterlife and probably most people most people say like this is it you know and then and then you get your reward when you die or something like that I'm saying this is that this is that this is that what just because you have this big holographic projection around you I mean I know it's pretty thick you don't like bang into it too strong and like you know you don't hit it too strong because I understand the physical worlds quite you know compelling but but if you spend your life now already in the spiritual realm which means that your deep dedication to Tara you're in deep dedication of deep dedication to holiday experiences Chaves of deep dedication to mitzvahs deep dedication to to when you pray you meditate not to mention other times a meditation but at least when you're praying you're in full meditation not just lip service it's not it's not the service of the lips prayers the service of the heart and it's a Buddhist ship of late and so we do the service of the heart when we pray and if you if you make your life about that so you're already living in the next world you're already there really and then this thin crust is like it's like just entertaining it's just for your own entertainment the physical world and it is quite entertaining now so we're talking about these parallel rounds and there's there's all these realms coming down and and we're in this thin memory now we spoke about do two types of awareness first it's just you're conscious of just your awareness of my voice speaking right now that's your frontal cortex that's just stimulation of the neurons then you got your awareness of that awareness that's that thin membrane and then you got what that's connected to which is this massive spiritual entity called the soul now that soul is not unique to you you may actually have you can have probably twenty four people walking around the planet who share your soul because the soul the soul like pops out like in various ways I what would be a good analogy man there's something like kids toward that when you squeeze it stuff like comes out the and it's like a next ball it's like an egg sometimes there's a net around a ball if you squeeze it like little balls come out of then out of the holes you know in time out yeah if you have to see my kids with these things anyway so you were thinking that big ball when you first saw it and didn't realize what it was for until you start squeezing it you probably would have seen it as one soul um you know it's got a body it's got a soul but actually when you squeeze it it's it's really one soul but it's got multiple bodies coming off so we have we have multiple bodies coming off single Souls and and there's then there's like major souls that have even meaning let's say your body's coming off a specific soul that's gotta let's say another 24 people around who you share their soul but and so you'd all say you're one soul just with 24 bodies but there's I don't know but in a visual I mean it's a little hard to explain it individual visual I'd be like maybe like that this is the soul this is the body let's make them friends and so on and so on and so now you think this is one soul but it actually has it is one soul but it also is bubbling off of another one which bubbles off another one because because there are certain souls in the in the world's name most were not in our world I know because we just would kind of run out of people like this but there are souls that encompass whole categories of the souls and those are called tsadikim and that tsadikim are these people that like literally like all the souls are coming off those souls and there were even a couple souls that had all 600,000 root souls coming off that one person meaning we knew there was an actual human being who embodied all 600,000 root souls we're all part of these six hundred thousand results the reason I said 24 is if you divide 14 million into into four if you divide 14 million by 600,000 you get to about 24 so I was doing even math but who knows like how many people are really around but there are people who embody all the souls no one's like that today but but two of the people there's a tradition of many different people but two people we know for a fact where everyone agrees like whether you're Hasidic or lit Fisher's fart is sure well you're you're Aaron agrees that the soul of Moses contained all the souls diamino passion of emotion of the that moshe was part of our soul structure and in also the other one where I just was I just came back from there it's rebbi shimon bar yohai the human bio coil so he was the embodiment of all the souls this is why it's really interesting that that on his yard site the the day he passed away is one of the biggest parties on earth they say you can see it from outer space it's a really big party like seven eight hundred thousand people ascend to his tomb and it's free food and free drink and it's thirty hours long and there's a dance floor that holds maybe a hundred thousand people like it imagine 100 thousand people going like hey because the band you know what bands will slow it down and bring it to a jump imagine how the foundation from it's amazing to watch and they're in the women's section though yeah they're not summer jumping but most are just crying the whole time no quarter million women going like this I'm just crying crying and it's like it the most joyous place but they respond that this isn't a cry of pain this is a spontaneous combustion going on where the whole soul just leaps out of your heart and you just start sobbing and a lot of the men are stopping to go like you'll be in the middle of dance and you're sobbing it's really a special day the question what are what's everyone doing they're like half those people don't even know rebbi shimon bar yohai is they're just drawn they're the souls are drawn there and i can meet people the week of and i said so when he going up and you know like going up the day before are you gonna have the day IV going over the morning then the the if they ever say to me I'm not going what do you mean when am I going I'm not going I say to him why have you never been and he says how did you know I could be talking like a 45 year old cabinet how do you know I've never been I said because had you been once you'd be going the only way you're not going is cuz you've never been there be once you've been there you're going and I I met a French secular kid kid from Paris his brother his brother became observant and he invited you here in Israel and he invited him to to this York site and here the secular French kid 14 years old comes to rebbi shimon and ever since then he has to fly in every single year not at all connected to Torah he doesn't even know who every Shimon bar Yohai is I met him already in his 56 year of coming there and and anyway that's the way it works and everything's free which is which is really awesome you don't have to bring money you know you bring your body there's no room for you anyway just bring your soul just bring your soul forget leave your body in Jerusalem and bring your soul to rebbi shimon and a but he's also part of this whole experience and there's another reason why why the Hasidic world's a very good route for people and to be a Hasidic Jew and when I say a City I'm not timeout any particular type or I'm not even saying anything about clothing you don't have to have these you know that it is but but because of the Hasidic recognition of the spiritual realities of the world as opposed to just the law like just the Shannara which I oh my gosh I've been I was just a trebius of Cara's hip graven in the author of the the occur in the compander that something of the Shannara the base Joseph but it's not just that I threw a meditative party last night underneath his sure where his face tinge sat and you can't even get in there really you need a key to get in you gotta speak to the family that's there since Egypt there in spot since Egypt and they have the key they're there for like 40 generations and they uh and just those who roll with me know that there's no there's no the word no isn't in my vocabulary so but I'm not manipulative at all I just I just set my vision on something and and so here we are in there but it's not just his based and we're worth we're having all the candle lit you know meditations and stuff with simply spot the band like one of the best bands out of Israel ever are the band for just what was there maybe 15 of us in there the band and and it was simply spot you rehearse simply so I thought amazing anyway but inside is a cave and in that cave was where and we sat in that chair meditated last night was where the bass yosef yeah and don't forget for those who raced lit fish those who raised lit fish and get this he would he would who's the patient okay way before the receive him inland foxes it's like 400 years ago he wouldn't repeat Michener's he'd find a Mishnah he would repeat the Mishnah over and over again until he went into a trance when he'd go into the trance his voice a voice would start coming out of his throat and the voice in his throat was called the Maggie many people have had muggings over the year but the Basie us have had his own moggy for years and years and the Maggie would speak out of his voice and we teach him all parts of Torah that were not available anymore just because of the exile because you know since the Romans ransacked everything like we've had a rough time keeping things and knowing everything so the Maggie Tootie taught him all the parts of Torah helped him when he didn't know a holophone among it would help him with a lot of it to make sure many of the helices in the Shannara are from the Maggie the Maggie coming out meaning their Mamaki coming out of his voice the he he also to cool a Lewis came from the Maggie that what hassidim read on Shavuos that was from the Maggie and that's the it's a little bit of each parsha throughout all of Tanakh and some other things but what we read from the Maggie days and what we read on Shavuos is from the Maggie he also and the Maggie though is tricky one of the experts in this was telling me that he was there with us and he said that the moggy will actually try to trick trick someone who's on this level by going against the torah the mag will actually say things against the torque to see if the person that he's inhabiting will keep the Torah over the magnet it'll actually test the person because you're getting total this is coming from the upper worlds and it'll start messing with you just to see with your faithful to God or faithful to it and so he was getting tested but he was he was could so I feel so car you know he's like he could hack it and and anyway anyway with that I got to be in that place like right in that spot and all of us were taking turns going in there and meditating this little spot then coming back to the band and over there how'd we get on we even get on this OS thing about the proceeding is that the the Hasidic world is very much into this and this part of Judaism is half of Judaism so you don't want like a you want to live half of Judaism you know a lot of people think if they dot their eyes and cross their T's and like didn't break Halawa because they you know we're dedicated to new it so well but whatever you're missing half of Judaism because there's two types of study in Judaism there's the study there's their I turn around there all these loving people there's two types of study in Judaism there's me mood a Shem and then there's called me mood a rustle a shape so there's Lehman a Hashem and then there's lean would date ruts own Hashem there's much more of this than there's a Miss but the Shiva's only study this if you got anyone ever go to yeshiva or as part of the issue of environment this is what you studied now could be obviously some great Torah scholars are secretly on you know like involved in very and by the way doing this Nia Slee is the highest way you can do it to do this with great modesty and secrecy is to study them with a shin but leavened a rut son of Shem is the is what is generally studied and and so what these words mean is is this is the study of God or spirituality this is spiritual studies is to become a spiritual person and eliminate ruts and a chemise them is the learning of God's will and that is the hahaha doing doing the will of God which is the positive negative commandments to avoid them negatives keep the positives and and this isn't a question of importance because one you do with your body is what you do with your body meaning the negative things keep your body away from these things like pork or light switches on job is like keep your body away from that stuff and get your body shaking cosmic vegetation on it suckas you know get your body doing these things this is like this is the important things where to put your body but this is where you put your soul because that's the whole study of the spiritual realms and this is something that aspartic and Hasidic community are very into studying and again the scholarship of the non Hasidic world they study it but otherwise they leave it they they do not share it much and I'm sure high level scholars many other scholars don't study it but but many do and the where is in the Hasidic world you're really supposed to be studying this now it never was institutionalized so no one should think here and none of these young whippersnappers think that you get to go to a Hasidic yeshiva you're gonna study it they don't study it either you shiva's are further what to do and what not to do you study the law so apropos we're talking about this right now it's precious miss Parshat Mishpatim which is very interesting because last week's partial pressure sores about revelation mediation okay you're done with your revelation and then you gotta like avenge you're gonna stop going like that and you like okay now what you know imagine you guys are like don't get that gonna come before Mount Sinai and after a while it's starting to wear off you know cuz it happened already the revelation happened and then all of a sudden you see some waitress walk by with like a holding up tray of like you know steaming hot burgers fries two coves she just walked by and you're just like and then and then you catch yourself like oh my gosh like I think that was such a physical moment like I'm I mean like spirituality right now and that's why we have partial submission Parshat Mishpatim is the law how to keep the law how to do too long why what's the connection connection is well first of all think about it every time you've ever had like a climactic moment in your life you're your inner voice always says how can i sustain it or it says it's such a shame that's gonna and you know how many of you have been in that don't raise your hands for this but how many have you been in a relationship with someone where you gave your whole heart it could be just a friend in school whatever but you gave your whole heart but party it was always scared like this is gonna end you know like this isn't gonna last forever and there there's always that feeling inside that whenever you get to a peak moment there's a part of us that's broken over the fact that it's going to end and so and so what is Mich bucked him this week sparsh right after purchases for the revelation the answer is well what if you were to live your life based on Jewish law so that you would be a vessel for the continuation of Revelation but if you can live your life based on Jewish law Aloha so that you would be a vessel so that so that revelation keeps moving in you be a vessel for Revelation and sadly the overemphasis on me moved a rust on a sham which is the law this is I guess we'll call this the spirit an experience or ancient versus ritual origin together they make spear ritual and to be a spiritual person you're gonna have spirit and ritual but they but what happens is we get so busy with the ritual of it all what not to do what to do that we lose the spirit of it all you know and and I've brought this up many times that you can see it mostly marriage it's like a super easy example that if you're if you're only keeping the do's and don'ts of your marriage but you never say I love you you know no hugs no ins Mizzy yeah how's that what kind of marriage that ain't nobody got time for that she says over okay in the opposite what about someone who's just the most or she and they are that you know the most romantic couple ever you know cuz they're just in the full spirit of love together but they completely and totally ignore each other's needs yeah that's also gonna be not gonna work very well and this by the way for young single people I know a lot of people here from observant backgrounds but you know when watching this maybe it's not but the that for young single people this is why you don't date until you get married meaning you don't you don't get involved deeply with a person until you're married because if there's no vessel that's what we just hit this is the vessel if there's no because think about it why would you give your heart to someone who you're not wheeling or take that heart of someone you're not willing to do what they'd want and avoid what they wouldn't want why would you if you're not willing to carry this person's needs why would you give your heart to them cuz they're not ready to carry your needs either so will you fooling around with your heart for this person can't handle you they also don't get your heart the way someone earns your heart is by agreeing to carry you with everything it takes to carry you other than that no tickee no Washee yeah no you have no heart no heart you know no commitment no heart and I've mentioned this before I mention this last week I can't mention everything we love it the that that this is why marriage requires sorry relationships intimate relationships require contracts it has to be so hard to get out that would probably ruin your life otherwise don't mess with it it's too dangerous and they you know they thought they thought in the 60s that when they got rid of birth control no we don't have to worry about this stuff anymore like you know it's easy huh it ain't easy it's deeply entangled and it's a massive spider web that you can get caught up in it's extremely sticky they took away one tiny element compared to the elements that happen you don't give your heart to someone who's not willing to hold everything that you that it takes to hold you you don't give your heart to someone like that you wait until there's an insurance policy on your finger you're wetting your finger until you have an insurance policy on your wedding finger you have no business giving your heart to somebody and they have to deserve it and have to understand the seriousness of it to the point where they're willing to to be that committed it has to be damn hard to drop you you know don't get involved with people and by the way I feel about to say this for anyone involved in relationships already but I mean you should leave that person immediately because if they haven't popped the question yet that means if they're what they're really saying is I'll be with you till something better comes along that's ultimate what they're saying cuz if they're that into so why are they only that into you but not all the way the answer is that okay you'll do you'll do till something better happens and so any the the fact that anyone and another thing is it's what you need to do to develop yourself into someone worth Mary no offense but what you need to do to develop yourself into someone worth marrying that means if anyone's dating you that means they're a loser because they're willing to get date you before you're ready which means which means that you're dating a loser who's willing to date you don't date anyone who's willing to date you exactly but but develop yourself develop yourself into someone worth having and then you see who lines up develop you something to someone worth having see who that attracts into your life and and that's the kind of person you want to date you know and and not not someone where you're at now you gotta you gotta don't get near anyone who would take you right now you gotta get in a much higher level before you'd even consider someone who wants you now you slap them just slap them and they really should probably be slapped because that person's probably not even in for the long haul so they really need to have slapped ya how do you know you're ready you know you're ready when the people you're close with because in the Jewish community we're very close with Mentors very close with mentors we Rabbie's Rebbetzin like you know we're close to people and they have great experience these mentors and you're at their house for Shabbos and you help with their kids and you're like part of their lives and they eventually it might be your own family by the way it might be your own family and they and they eventually say to you hey you made it it's time you know and a great indicator is when your older sibling got married if you're from an observant home where the older siblings get married at a certain age that's very helpful for you because it creates an internal deadline that you have to grow to and whereas I pity the fool who ain't got no siblings we got married at a normal age because that there's no there's no red line of where you are ready it just keeps pushing back and so you're you know you don't develop yourself much because it's just like it's it's a it's a nebulous it's a nebulous border when it's time it just keeps going and so therefore why should I really develop myself because of no real edge to that and we're human beings are amazing with deadlines we're good with deadlines and when your siblings got married that's an excellent deadline as long as they're young got married young and you got a nice good deadline you'll probably do your development naturally just knowing deep down there's a deadline like that and no one develops more than the strong deadlines people like I have neighbors Hasidic neighbors that you just don't get to 17 or 18 without getting engaged everyone every single boy and every girl gets engaged 17 18 and and it's just such a lock stock barrel deadline that no one gets married before they're ready because it's your just your heart does all the work to develop itself to get ready they they're they're gonna laugh their way to the bank but but the problem is they don't know how to do money meeting meeting these people are they super simple you know like you know in the gold road types you know they they don't they don't belong to a gym let's just say yeah these people are their their own breed like amazing Mount Sinai people who are like they just never caught on to modern day world now you can raise you can't raise your kids like that but people who still can't why not why not everyone seems pretty happy over there and I I made this silly mistake of thinking I could and only real I mean it didn't take me long to realize but after a little while I was like I think I'd like my kids to be a little more well-rounded than the entire community I joined and so my kids are like my kids were like a they're like a clearinghouse of information for these kids it's almost like I have to tell my kids like don't tell them too much about everything cuz cuz they're lined up to be married at 17 18 and they're gonna figure everything out later with their spouses and you don't have to tell him everything but my kids I in the end I wanted them to be you know well-rounded I was younger dumb you know Russian I think my kids have a great appreciation for the world they were raised and even though they're not you know that world they fit in much more with a Hasidic American scene you know Europe Belgium London those types of Hasidic places my kids years and now like you're saying that like we're really not ready what's the what's like what's the idea what's a healthy ideal in a 21st century so probably girls 16 boys 18 I mean for our generation yes what would be AI mean ideal ideal would be girls 16 boys 18 that'd be ideal but to be real in our generation I would say I would say boys should get married between 1720 and girls should get married between 16 and 20 something like that I think that private what I would have been ideal my daughter got married it she got engaged right for 18th birthday yes she already had a kid when she was 18 so why it's good because there's nothing you can do it this money life but make trouble so if you were ready to get married you should be already building something you can't build anything when you're single till you're married you're not building sure she did with a baby yeah she's as a study Business Administration yeah and and she works as today she's the manager of a business it's a business it's what she does so anyway the yeah so the this being single is is a disaster it's a disaster you know no one should be single once that once they're feeling those feelings like boy would I like to invest my heart into a relationship every second you're single after that is just it's a disaster and and therefore you got to do everything you can to to just make good micro moves towards towards marriage we're gonna make good moves you gotta make moves but you're gonna make those micro moves don't want to stay single singles singles dangerous it's dangerous and you don't want to be 40 and single and and because think about what someone does from 40 on it's the only meaning in their life is just the meaning in their life is just this the generations that created are really the meaning of their life now it's not that you can't distract yourself but you can and distract yourself I know plenty of servers in California who are just doing a hell of a job distracting themselves they're doing fine they really are doing funny you know I mean distracting your zone you want to be you want to be living the deep meaning that God created the world for you okay it's four o'clock ladies and gentlemen I'm gonna develop yourself