Rabbi Benzion Klatzko : When Bad Things Happen to Good People

hi good evening everyone so um it's actually been a long day this is my I think six or seventh speech today so uh hopefully I Sav The Best For Last right I actually I want to share something so beautiful with you does anyone here listen to radio Hut you should listen hiut radio so um I I think mainly it's in Brooklyn although it's growing but it thousands of people listen and uh I I speak in radio Hut on Mondays at between 10 and 12 and each week I try to speak about something that would you know people should be interested in it and we'll speak about the situation of shim or kids at risk or divorces and who's taking care of them or we'll speak about what def finds Jewish music and whatever it is whatever is on my mind that week and maybe it's tied into the parha maybe it's tied into current events and it may not be it doesn't make a difference if it's on my mind that I'm passionate about it I'll speak about it and hopefully we'll get a a nice reception and people will call on the show and they'll text and um it'll be an exciting show so this morning I decid I'm going to speak about Shalom bias always relevant you know people who are married and even people who are thinking of getting married have to consider the ramifications of learning how to keep peace in the home and what happens is we usually speak about what the issues are and of course when we speak about issues people have a lot to say and after about 10 minutes of the show I changed my mind I said I don't like where this is going you know people should call up and say oh we're having a problem at home I don't know it's sort of a downer at 10:00 in the morning and I just I I I said you know what I think the reason that sh and bias is an issue in many homes it's because we focus on the negative in the home instead of focusing on the positive POS and all of those positive and virtuous traits that our spouse brings to the table we take for granted because we're used to them and whether those whe whether that's just the fact that your husband brings home a paycheck or you bring home the paycheck or the dishes are washed and the laundry is folded and he's patient and she's kind and they do and you know that's all expected so what we do is we focus on yes he's all that but this is what really gets to me it really bothers me or she's all that but I you know I really wish I wish you wouldn't be like this in this particular issue and then we focus on it and focus on it until all of the other things recede into the background and all we could think about is wow this is really an issue for me and eventually if you build up the issue in your mind in a big enough way you're going to say you know what I I'm just not comfortable with this marriage it's not what I bargained for and you know there is divorce out there and sometimes divorce is necessary I had a I had a son who asked me just recently over y we had many divorces and one of my sons said to me he said t out of all the people are divorced here how many people do you think could have made it if they had worked a little harder So my answer to him was I have no idea CU I don't know their stories and even if I knew their stories it would be on a superficial level and not on an emotional level but the idea that one of my children should understand that just because there is rift and dissension and argument doesn't mean to say goodbye say the end sometimes it's just we have to focus and appreciate what we did gain from our spouse so on this radio show I said you know what in the non-jewish world they have a they they have programs that play music and people can call up and dedicate love songs to the one they love oh play such and such because it says how much I love you okay this is going out to Cindy Cindy this is from John Da D okay he loves you right just the just like the words of the song so we don't have that but I said let's do something similar to that I'm going to open up the phone lines and I'm going to open up the the text where people text a text and then I read it on the air I'm going to open this up and CLA Isel tell me what you appreciate about your spouse what do you want to thank Hashem what do you want to say for when you look at the one who you love what do you want to say thank you for him we set a record this morning a record our phone lines burnt up the text messages came in so fast and so furious and I think you know in the media they say bad news is good news because in the bad news everyone sells newspapers so when you speak about something positive no one wants to speak about positive let's speak about the issues let's speak about hurt let's speak about pain well CL proved that wrong on this day because there was so much love one lady calls up I want to thank my husband for making shabas in our home full of kadha she says I know some husbands they speak about mundane things to the table and it brings down the shabas table and then the and then the wife is like honey maybe have and the wife tries to get it back on track and give it some kadosha she says I don't have to do my husband knows how to keep kadha in the table and a man call up and say and I would like to express on the air my appreciation for my wife who changed just smelly diapers yes yes they smell but they smell just as much for her as they do for me and she does it and she does it with Simka and she does it and I want her to know I appreciate it two people called up and they said you know we're married for one year but we see so much every day that we're married we see more in our spouse and we thank I more each and every day and um and it it was so beautiful it was so beautiful and there were twice during the show I had like com compos myself cuz I was about to cry like when you see so much of raw emotion and thanks instead of the typical let's bash let's speak about kids at risk let's speak about this at risk and this is bad and this is wrong and the K this and this that no let's speak about what we appreciate in our spouse it was so wonderful so the show finished and I went on to my next speech I spoke at M bakov and as I speak at M bakov I get a text and the text says in the spirit of your amazing show I want to express my to you I don't have a day that goes by without thank Hashem for having you in my life I want to let you know these sentiments your loving wife shie it was from my wife so in this Spirit of the show there was so much love so I have to start off with this because what I want to speak about tonight we're going to speak a little bit about sadic valalo when we look around the world and we see pain and it's a deep and difficult subject we're in SP and there was a lot of pain many people were during SP many of the of RAB and we see pain and right away we have a problem we have an issue how could hasem why did hasem and so on so before we even begin I was thinking to myself how appropriate this show is today right before we speak about sadic falo because I had a student who said to me I don't believe in God okay you know that's I work on a college campus and that's where you get a lot of people don't I said why don't you believe in God so he says to me because why do so many bad things happen to good people I say I don't understand what a has to do with B he say well I don't believe in God because so many bad things happen to good people I said so why so why don't you believe in God again he says because I said because so many bad things happen to good people I say what does that have to do with God maybe God maybe God is bad why are you assuming God is good and therefore if God is is good then he can't exist cuz so many bad things happen maybe your assumptions wrong maybe God is bad why why why is that not a good answer for you what does bad things have to do with God existing but it's simple the simple reason why this person jumped to that conclusion is because we assume that if there's a God he must be good now what gives us that right to assume to assume that why do we assume God is good says one person once said well if there's a if God is bad I'd rather not live in that world that's a silly answer because it's an emotional answer which does not address the question whether whether you want to live in this world has nothing to do with the fact of God being bad or good I'm just take I'm just look at your equation you said I don't believe in God because God because so many bad things happen to good people and I'm saying back to you maybe God is bad you don't assume God is bad you know why you don't it's very simple because if you take all of the bad all of the tragedy all of the disaster and you put it on one side it doesn't equal even a small fraction of the good that is happening at the very same moment while 200,000 people were dying in a tsunami 7 bill million people were being fed and even during the war even during the Holocaust even at the darkest time and the and and the and the most desperate hour Hashem still made sure that our hearts would beat Hashem still made sure that people would be fed and Hashem kept this world going with all of its beauty and with all of its Splendor and therefore when a person looks around the world they do see beauty they see Majesty the only thing is it seems to be inconsistent it's there seems to be an inconsistency and therefore and therefore they say if God is good and I'm assuming God is good because I see so much good happening then why do some bad things happen as well that's their question so there are five major approaches to this question there are five basic approaches to this question why do bad things happen to good people the question is a legitimate question and it doesn't need me to say it's legitimate M himself said explained that that means that said why do bad things why do bad things happen to good people there was a man by the name of her Kushner who lost a son very tragically it's conservative Rabbi so after he lost his son he decided to write a book and he named the book why do bad things happen to good people sort of stunning that there was never a book written by that name until Harold Kushner but Harold Kushner wrote it and that that book resonated with many people and he made tons of money became very famous as the why do bad things happen to good people so what was his great answer his answer was it must be if God could let my son die it must be that God created the world and then let the world be and has no as does not control anything he made the world and then pulled away now besides that intellectually that makes very little sense intellectually speaking when the the way we understand Creator is a Creator invests in the creation and makes very little sense to create and then okay now let's see them fight it out let's see them destroy themselves makes very little sense right aside from that the whole the whole notion is a very self-serving notion because why do you assume that you're a good person right and that's that's we learn the way we learn and the way we learn as far as muser goes is we say you know what I have done enough wrong in my life that if anything happens to me I could pin it on a number of things that I deserve it for whether it's Brana or lashara right there's no lack of things that Hashem could look at me and say you know what clco you got plenty that that on your kban Hashem should protect me from it but if something happens I don't have to oh I'm a good person how could a bad thing happen Shem should watch us and wait until we do tsha but really the question itself does not make any sense there are certain questions that sound very legit but the question makes no sense and when you hear the question you say oh that's a good question until you think about it I'll give you one of the famous examples is the old philosophical question to disprove Hashem and the question is is can God create a rock that he can't lift have you he that question can God make a rock and either way it proves there's no God why because if he could make it then he can't lift it so God is not all powerful and if he can't make it then he's still not all powerful so either way he's not all powerful sound like a very legitimate argument right no not legitimate you know why because its supposition is incorrect because really what's the question really what's what's the hidden parentheses in that question it's not can God make a rock that he can't lift if you look at the way the questions asked in philosophy it's if asked can God make a rock a rock that he can't LIF and you know why they put in the word if asked because it takes the Free Will out of hashem's hands because if you just ask a question can God create a rock that he can't lift the answerers that question makes zero sense because what what character traits did he create within that rock did he does he want that rock to be a rock that he could lift then he could lift it does he want it to be a rock that he can't that that he can't lift then his will is that he can't lift it either way he's all powerful it asking that question is almost like saying can Hashem say yes and no at the same time can he create a rock that he can't lift well what was his gavana who his kavana was that it shouldn't be lifted then he's all powerful cuz his cavana was fulfilled and if he wants it to be lifted then he could lift it cuz that's his kavana so that's why we say if asked so someone else wants it to be but that's not Hashem right if it want you phrase that question like that then you're not speaking about the same Hashem that I recognize because Hashem is the one who makes his own decisions right hashem's not asked okay you you understand that was sort of deep and quick but I think you got it so too why do bad things happen to good people is a question that is full of hidden parentheses okay should we explore what what is the question hey why do bad things happen to good people I'm so smart well let's figure it out the very first parenthesis in that question is the following it's not why do bad things happen to good people parenthesis why can't I understand end of parenthesis why why do bad things happen to good people that's the real question because if you take away why can't I understand so then you have your answer why bad things happen why why do bad things happen to good people you can't understand it so that happens the things you can't understand well why can't I understand you you understand so okay are you following this get a little deep so the question of why do bad things happen to good people is really asking why can't I understand why bad things happen to good people but when I finish it there's a brackets within the parenthesis cuz Who Am who am I why can't I understand who Am I who am I I am a I'm a person I'm a person so what is a person by definition well by definition of person is very limited we're weak we're fragile we don't know the future we're not all powerful we're not all knowing right that's the definition of an i why can't I meaning why can't people unless I think I'm not a person so if I'm a person I'm say why can't I brackets who is a person who is not all powerful not all knowing weak don't remember what I had for breakfast and so on why can I understand why Hashem or why God what second what's your definition of God I'll make sure we're speaking about the same definition anyone want to give me a definition of God all powerful all powerful all knowing all knowing definition of God if you don't think God is all powerful all knowing then you're speaking about a different God than me okay so now let's look at the entire question why can't I who is not all powerful not all knowing have have very very little say and what goes on in the universe why can't I understand why God who is all powerful who is all knowing makes bad things happen to good people well now you have your answer the answer is in the question the answer is because you're you're you're you're 3month old I can't understand why you pay taxes cuz you don't know money exists so you want to understand why you can't understand that being was all knowing well that's cuz you're not all knowing you don't know history you don't know the past you know the future there's very little and that's not even addressing the Bad and the good because how do you know what bad is why why why do bad things happen you know what a bad thing is to good people you know what a good person is shimu didn't know told that you see you see with your heartart you see you see with your eyes I see in the heart so the question itself is lacking yeah I don't think that's the question which I don't think that's the question I think the question is why didn't God give us the ability to understand what happens why didn't he give us the ability to understand gave us the ability to understand that then I don't think anyone has that in mind when they ask the question but if they do if they do then I can give you an answer to that as well I don't think that's a why didn't Hashem give me the ability to see the future the ability what he didn't even give MH the ability trend is that right why is it that we don't even have the power to understand it okay so why don't we have the power to understand why bad things happen to good people right that's that's really why don't why didn't Hashem give me that power so part of that power is going to be the power to know the future because most if not all of ramifications or outcomes of what a person does is not known instantly so it's played out over time so if you want to know why didn't Hashem give us the ability to see into the future or we should all be I can give you he showed mosha the future he still even mosha even Mo no he didn't show mosha the exact future he gave one example mosha didn't know the future if mosenu had known the future then he wouldn't have hit the rocku did not know the future Hashem once in a while would give a Nai a glimpse into the future but the the the lack of free will that would incur from knowing the future would uh would negate our reason for existence if I know what's going to happen let's say a person cheats if they know the future they're going to get caught and thrown to jail would they ever cheat I wouldn't but you think you'll get away with it some of them know and they still do that's true some people are like that that's right the the criminal returns to the scene of the crime right he knows the police are there but he can't help himself but in general Hashem is not going to give us that ability okay so you got a question okay so that's on a simple level level but lot so so therefore before we even go into answering the the some of or using some of the approaches to understand why do bad things happen the first thing we need to do is we need to come with a tremendous humbleness and understand that we know less about the konos the calculations of Hashem than a three-month-old knows about paying taxes we know less about what Hashem does now my three-month-old does not know that money exists he barely knows that I exist and he certainly doesn't know a government exists and he doesn't know that streets have to be upkept and he doesn't know that firemen have to be paid so he doesn't understand taxes and yet he still understands them on his level better than we understand how Hashem runs this marvelous universe and therefore we come with the humbleness now sometimes Hashem will allow us to glimpse into the future or to look back and see how his master plan is laid out sometimes he does it and we don't even put we don't even connect the dots and when that happens it's our own fault I want to tell you a story six years ago we moved from Los Angeles California 5 years ago our house burnt down oops my house burned down my wife calls me up I was in Texas I was training in some rabbis over there for a new col and I get a phone call my wife gets on the phone and she says I have a question does Hashem love us now my wife is a basak of bar Park girl and that just that question just seems very out of character of course Hashem loves us why are you asking she said one second one more question is every thing Hashem does for the best I said a sh now you're really scaring me what's going on she says Okay first first of all everyone's okay she she says that to calm me down she doesn't realize that scares me much more because you're like if we're talking about life and limb that means like till there so she says first of all everyone's okay but I just want to let you know that I'm sitting outside on the front lawn we have six fire trucks here and our house is burning down now we owned that house we we we had that house um one year and we bought it at the top of the market like the very next month the prices the bubble burst and prices went all the way down so bought at the top of the market now that house is gone and that was it so I told I tell the rabbis a middle of training okay got to go they said where are you going back to New York why well my house just burnt down no really Rabbi why no really my house is bur down so I put it down and I had this long flight to Jet Blue and I'm thinking to myself oh no here I have to go and rebuild the house we have to hire a contractor and contact insurance and get an adjuster and just one thing after the next and we have to find a new house and it just it's it seems like an insurmountable amount of work and remember I bar 11 kids I think we had 10 at the time enough to make it a major Challenge and to tell you how big the challenge was all this happened a week before pesak a week before p and so yes everyone came over to me and Sh hey I I guess you did beer I guess as if and I had to laugh each time as if that was the first time I heard that funny joke which wasn't funny anyways cuz it was my house well at least you did beer as a matter what they don't even realize is when I was young when I was 15 years old my house burned down also on the exact same day a week before PES exact same day my house burned down I don't know what that means sometimes things happen we don't know why Hashem does it and we just say you you know what Hashem you run the world I don't know why you did it you know we don't always have to have you know everything wrapped up in a nice bow say ah the reason why we don't know I'll tell you just to divert a little bit after I got married two weeks after I got married I was on my honeymoon in Cleveland in my parents basement very romantic and as I was honeymooning uh I got got a phone call I picked up the phone and I heard some terrible news I heard that one of my dear friends whose name was yakob y Goldstein was in a car accident and he was neft and he was a he was a dear friend I was very sad I actually had another friend I was very close with who was thrown from the car who had his arm ripped off and then a third friend who had a seat belt on and barash he he uh he came away with without a scratch but um one friend the friend who lost his arm they had to surgically reattach it and Yak Goldstein was left there so my wife saw my face and she was so uh she saw how destroyed I was so she said you know what I think you should fly in for the levia so I said okay I'm going to so I took I took the flight very early in the morning I got to New York I used my in-laws car and I drove to the levia now usually at a levia you don't expect anyone to even notice that you're there such a tragedy but the father Rabbi Goldston came over to me and gave me a hug and a kiss he said you know I know you just got married and it it was so meaningful that you came in for the levia that it meant so much to me and and I said you know we should see each other with Sim he was such a good boy and I felt so bad gold so at the end of the the end of the levaya I decided to drive down to the hospital where my other friend who had his arm reattached decid to go and visit him and I'm driving down the BQE and there's a place in the BQE Brooklyn Queens Expressway where the where the street Narrows and you go from 50 m an hour to 5 m an hour there's almost always traffic there so I'm driving towards the hospital and I get on the BQE and all of a sudden traffic slows down from 50 to 5:00 so I slow down I look in the rear view mirror and behind me is a truck and clearly the guy is spacing out cuz he doesn't notice that the traffic had suddenly slowed down to 5 miles an hour I had a moment to scream which I did and the truck plowed into my car and it hit it at 50 mph a truck and this car accordioned boom like an accordion and it was a Nace I was sitting there in the driver's seat the car accordioned so badly that I ended up facing the roof of the car the seat itself buckled under me but without a scratch it was a nice nigler I come out of the car and I'm shaking and the truck driver gets out of his car he didn't know how many people were in the car he thought wow he for sure must have killed somebody cuz the car was crushed and he looks at me and he say I'm so sorry I don't know what happened I said it's okay I was the only one in the car I'm okay I was still shaking I said let me have your license to registration he said sure sure sure he takes out his license he gives it to me I begin to shake cuz his name was Yak Goldstein how was his name he was from Israel this person is on the license of Jacob Isaac Goldstein an Israeli truck driver y the same name as the person who was n what does it mean I don't know I don't know what it means I don't know I just told you this because not everything wraps up in a neat bow but we know is moving the pieces around in his own way so that was it so we lost our house now the difficulty was we had no place to go for pesak so I called the Traveler's Insurance and I tell the insurance you know we need to go to a place like a PES hotel that can accommodate our family that has kosher food that has a minion and the and travelers insurance they said okay how much will it cost so we priced it out and it was about for a family our size about $220,000 so I call the insurance and I say it's going to be $20,000 and they laughed into the phone we're not paying $20,000 for eight days in a in in a hotel we'll put you in a Holiday Inn or a motel six or whatever it is and you know for 60 80 bucks a night and that's it we're not paying 20,000 I said no no that's not going to do I need a place for for PES so they wouldn't budge so we we we call out the big gun guns we called aoda and the head of aoda was a man by the name of Kim please okay there's by by the name of K D weel and Kel is the head of the AA and he calls up travelers insurance and he says I'm the head of this organization that has hundreds of thousands of members one of our members just had a devastating fire they we have Passover and they need a place to stay and we understand that you are their insurance carrier we just want to let you know that we expect you to accommodate this family and if you don't accommodate them we will have to let our constituents know that um that uh Travelers does not uh does not take care of its religious members a mere few minutes later we receive a phone call Travelers Insurance had a change of heart they didn't say why but we knew they said okay you can go well at that point we actually have to find a hotel that would take us right before PES and even though we had the money the room that's an issue there's no room so finally we found a place um sponsored by the Heritage Center of poroi and he and he had a place in his hotel so he said ra clat I'll let you come if you agree to speak let's say four times over Yan so I said okay I'll be I'll be happy to speak I'm a rabbi I like to talk no problem no problem so we had a wonderful y of the food was great the food was fantastic was amazing was very it was a very nice Yan and I spoke over yant at the end of yan I get a phone call and the man on the phone says hi my name is Rabbi Kim Samson and I work for project inspired I think he's the founder of project Inspire and he said I I was in the hotel over Y and I heard you speak and I want to know if you could speak for project Inspire I say sure he said okay how about this coming Mo shabas to speak for the Kila and Mony I said great meanwhile that week middle of davening I'm thinking to myself wouldn't it be great if there was a website that could connect every Jew in the whole world with shabas maybe with SH wouldn't that be amazing and I thought we'll call see you on chabas later on it became called shabbat.com I thought wouldn't it be great to have such a thing of course I couldn't afford to pay for such a huge project I know what I'm going to do I had no idea but while I was there speaking for project inspired that M shabas I said you know what KRA I want to give you a vision imagine if every Jew who had has availability for shabas where to open up their home every person needs a place Al singles were to sign up to be a guest wouldn't it be amazing you'd be able to take care of Bal truv you'd be able to take care of of of of of all of CLA after at the end of the speech a man comes running over to me his name was Lai needlman and Lavi says to me Rabbi I want to help you start off I'll be your fundraiser you'll be my fun yes I'll raise the money wow how amazing is that so we started and we began to build this infrastructure here we are a few years later and each week 6,000 people get invited for chabas think about it fire in the house 6,000 people a week are ending up with a place for shabas disaster fire in the house is that a disaster moves the chest pieces the chest pieces he moves them here and there Andes says trust me my dear children I know what I'm doing I've run this world for longer than you even realize trust me another story a fellow calls me up and he says oh I just want to let you know I found a place on shabbat.com he was an a from guy an older single and he says I want to tell you what happened happened to me this shabas this shabas I ended up by a family in Highland Park New Jersey and we I was enjoying shabas Friday night eating by this host from shabbat.com and in the middle of the meal this host is R I'm speaking about his Kila he said arila is wonderful but there is something that's going on that's very depressing and I said to the r what's the matter and he said well there's this lady in our community she's been in auna for 15 years the husband won't give her a gift get the best years of her life and it's it's so sad it's so depressing so this fellow in the middle of the conversation in the middle of listening to the r he says tell me what's this lady's name and the rav says okay this is her name this aun so the R so this guest says you know what I know this lady I was actually at her wedding 18 years ago Not only was I at her wedding I even remember something curious something that bothered me about that wedding so the r said what was it so the fellow says well you know I was at the wedding and they called up the aam for the kushan and I I knew one of the ADM and I knew I knew him personally and I knew he wasn't sh shabas and I was surprised that they used him to be an aid because you got to be shabas to be a k Aid the rub begins to shake after shabas they track down down the aid they track down the witness it turns out that the witness does admit that at that time he was not sh shabas today he is but at that time he was not sh shabas they then sent the letter to rebel yashiv and re they got back up they got back an answer that she's not Naga because legally according to T she wasn't married and thus she's not Nuna she is free to remarry now think about it it think about it fire in my house and auna can remarry who are we what do we really know we know what do we know maybe I wanted that particular guest to find to find this R so that the auna can be freed and the was a website that only had the the that was only Built because I had had a a donor a guy who would raise funds and I only found him because I spoke at a hotel and I was only the hotel cuz I wasn't at home because my house burnt down it's simple it's ABC no you put a lanter do I go to Lancaster that with I mean that piz I don't remember where it was well yeah year yeah I it was a beautiful I I tell you I ate so much mat were you and meet this this year you were project inspired this I spoke at project inspired this year I was at home we had 70 guest it was beautiful One More Story one more because we got the Connect the Dots here in the year 2010 on December 26th there was an epic snowstorm and I do mean epic which was which seemed to be very unfortunate because I was supposed to fly to Israel that night and it was it was really something for the ages I remember going out I had to give something to one of my sons rabim and the snow was coming down so quickly that I could barely make it from my house in from from my car which for some reason I drove a few blocks all the way till the RB's house it was ridiculous no one in their right mind was going out at night except for me cuz afterwards I decided to go to JFK cuz maybe the plane's going to leave what I was thinking so usually from month to JFK is an hour hour and a quarter it took me from 6 in the after in the evening the flight was 4 I don't know 12 12:30 I figur okay 6 hours enough to get to the airport wrong I left at 6:00 and we got the JFK at 3:00 in the morning 9 hours nine hours we drove and even that bar I had this amazing driver I wasn't driving myself and he just he just kept knowing how to get out of these situations everyone was littered at the side of the road I get there at 3:00 in the morning to find about 220 students who are part of our organization who were supposed to go on trips to Israel to learn about their Judaism at 200 20 students are there at JFK airport trapped and when I say trapped I mean trapped because half of those students were already on the plane L had kept them on the plane for also almost 9 hours saying we're we're going to go this Israeli mentality we're going to Goat but in order not to waste fuel the the engine was off which means that the air there was no air so there was sitting in a swell Sheltering plane for 9 hours finally L gave up and these people all sweaty and sticky and feeling disgusting went back into the terminal 220 students you can imagine the mood was Bleak it was so bad that there were people who said I don't want to go I don't want to I'm going home I'm going to call a pinch I'm going to go home and these are people who are going to experience toyra for the first time in their lives and now they're not going and food forget about it when people realized how big the snowstorm was everyone ran to the store and they bought all the food so there was no food there was nothing to drink in the airport no trucks were able to come in and out and everyone was Mish trapped so what do you do so what did I do I went to shabbat.com and I did a proximity search it's one of the features on the site I said find me every host within 10 miles of the airport remember this find me every host and select all message all boom I select them I message them all I said hi I'm Rabbi clco founder of shabbat.com we have 220 students they're getting depressed they're sad they have no food they have no drink they feel sticky and disgusting and hot and we need to help them out what can you do a few minutes later we get a phone call hi I was one of the people who received your message I'm on my way with a SUV full of food 10 minutes later I'm not on my way I got into the crash little crash not bad but he's not coming to the airport I think wow no one's going to come wrong a few minutes later my phone began to ring in such a in such rapid fashion never in my life one person after the next Rabbi what do they need what do they need let me bring I'm bringing this I'm bringing that one person brought 50 Pizza pies 50 five Z the next person brought tons of Carlos and gabbies tons of the most delicious food one another person brought another person brought cases of orange juice bagels cream cheese locks you name it so much food there ended up being an army of people who brought so much food that there was enough food not just for these students for this meal there was enough food for all the students for all the meals and everyone else on the plane over 800 meals were brought by this Army not only that but half of our students about a 100 or so students were offered and accepted to go into the SUVs to drive to far Rockway which is right near JFK Airport these people brought the college students to their house allow them to shower to to rest because the plane's not leaving for a while some of them were then brought over to sh Yash where they were able to hear some Torah and a sheer other people were able to relax and some played played pool at some wonderful house and they they just chilled and they felt good about and these people who had no connection to frite some of them had never met a from person outside of their Rabbi on campus suddenly saw a community give them a great big hug and they didn't know what to do with themselves and there was some students who said the best part of their trip to Israel was when the fari community welcomed them not even before they they they flew off to Israel and then they were brought back to the airport with plenty of time to go and we all flew off eventually 48 hours later we flew off with kashem and that was the power of our house burning down are you seeing it are you seeing it it's it's it's so obvious isn't it house PRS down 220 220 students are are are Mur K was made it was on in many newspapers if you Google it you'll see the story only one I think only one newspaper gave the credit shabbat.com others say I sent an email how do I have the email of every of every host in farak it's it's on the site obviously I don't have everyone's email anyways well we say why do you make bad things happen we have to stop and tell ourselves even when things are very share even when things seem Bleak and we're in gulus and we've had some very sad things happen recently you all know what happened in France such such tragedy Unthinkable monsters you know about this fire where all the kids in the house were were were killed and so I think the mother was the father was a father a father what was it five kids a father and five kids how does that mother even go on with life I don't get it and so on and and we see tragedy and tragedy itself we have to learn how to deal with it do we absorb it well you can't absorb all tragedy it'll destroy you right in the olden days there was a tragedy in pinsk they didn't know about it in Minsk happened in naric they didn't about Inka every tragedy was very local today thanks to newspapers and the internet that when the or the the Jewish press come to your front door you have the you have the culmination of all the tragedies that are happening to the Jewish people this week and it's depressing so if you absorb it you'll be ice match you absorb it it'll destroy you if you let it bounce off of you oh you got so sad okay but now let's continue our lives so then you become callous cold and cruel so we're in a very tough place so the only place where we could go is to say what you do and why you do it is beyond us that's this week's paron Aon kept silent these wonderful wonderful these leaders of the Jewish people Hashem why and the middle of you keep quiet you don't know and even when you think you know and even when I think I know oh the house burnt down because of this I don't know one millionth of a millionth of a millionth of the reason that made that happen and when I eventually when I found out I'm going to say Hashem you're so good to me everything all I could do is all I can say is Hashem you know what you're doing and I don't know what I had for breakfast you know you know it's beautiful story it's tragic story there's a family named a shaloma and they lived in AR Israel and it was a mother a father a son and two daughters and one day tragically the father was nther shalom shalom was n and this mother was very Miss Shalom was was was heartbroken she was so sad such a tragedy at the funeral while her husband was being buried her oldest son de goes over to her and gives her a big hug and says IMA I'm going to I'm going to look over you I'm going to guard you I'm going to take care of you I'm going to be the man of the house and he gives his IMA a great big hug and she knows she's got to she's got to go on for the sake of her son and her two daughters she has to be strong for them little while later D was called up to duty he was called up to serve in the tahal and he was called up for an operation called operation castled and you know she said a tearful goodbye to D and he was thrown into battle and in operation castled in Israel they were looking for tunnels that were made to smuggling arms to the Palestinians and they uncovered one of these tunnels and then they had to send the soldiers in in order to clear out the tunnel and then eventually destroy it so D was one of the first to go in and he never stood a chance there was a sniper there and the sniper shot de and killed him on the spot a medic came running to try to save the D not realizing D was mortally wounded and and the medic was shot although the medic survived he was very seriously injured but the was nft and when miss a shaloma heard that she lost the second man in her life she fell to Pieces she couldn't get out of bed she was so sad she was so heartbroken and it took the last of her energies to say I have to be there for my daughters KH and Esther I have to be there for them but it was pain and one particular morning she woke up and she woke up crying missing her husband missing her de and she says Hashem I need another hug from my de I need that hug I need to know that he's here and she's she cried all of a sudden there's a knock on her door it's khah Hannah says mom tonight there's an art show they're demonstrating how to do different kinds of art Lil KH was a buding artist and Khana said ma can you take me to the art show at the beginning miss a shaloma thought to herself I can't go I can't go out I can't go I can't I can't muster the courage and the energy but then she thought to herself you know what why should KH suffer because I can't pull it together so she says that's it KH I'm going to take you and he and she takes KH that evening to a large Auditorium there were many people there and the art demonstration began was all into it shaloma she was spacing out she was thinking she was full of sadness and all of a sudden she feels a bang on her head didn't hurt but just felt like a banging she turns around and there's a little baby with a toy hammer hammering on Miss shalom's head the parents when they realized what was going on they were mortified and they said said they said de come back come back D so so miss said that's okay don't worry don't worry but then M said I'm just curious you know how did he get that name it's a very rare name d even in Israel how did he get the name d they say this young couple they said it's an interesting story we've never told it to anyone but I guess since you're asking I I I'll we'll tell you you know one morning we we woke up up and we were reading the newspaper and we read about this terrible tragedy there was a lady her name is Miss ab shaloma and she had lost her husband and then she just lost her son he was the first soldier that was kid killed in operation castled and we were so moved and so sad and heartbroken by that story that my wife who was pregnant at that time and I we discusted and we promised that if the next baby would be a boy if our first baby would be a boy we would name after this Brave Soldier de but we never had the guts to tell Miss AB Shalom you know we didn't know how she would take it if she'd be if she'd think we were being disrespectful one day one day we're going to tell her we just we don't know how she's going to react so miss AB shaloma she's so emotional she says I want to tell you my name is Miss ab shaloma and that Dev was my son he was my son you named your son after my son so the lady breaks into a very warm and compassionate smile she says wow sh it's it's like your son came down and gave you a hug that was it was Shalom began to ball she began to cry and she said I'm sorry what did I say she said you don't understand just this morning I D to Hashem and I said I need a hug for my son I need a hug for my deir and here you're saying it's like it's like deir gave me a hug it's like I got a hug for my son D he said that's the most amazing thing to know that D is giving me a hug so I tell I tell this story I tell this story because the story doesn't have a particularly happy ending de did not come back to life Miss AB shaloma still has to proceed and continue and be strong for her daughters but it's a little bit of a glimpse the do cracked open just a little bit to let missal know that AK still loves her and AES cares about her and there is a nitus there is a next world and Miss AB shaloma you're getting a hug from your son D and he he's he's he still cares about you and he loves you and he's looking down from on high and he is sending that love why do bad things happen to good people someone said to me Rabbi why did 6 million people have to die in the Holocaust I said I'll tell you why for six million different reasons that's why do you want me to give you a blanket reason I know why everyone died not arrogant not Hashem I don't know why 6 million people died but I do know know that every person who passed away has a who knows what he's doing and whether a house has to burn down or whether there's an even greater tragedy and life does not come back but the Ripple effects and who that person may have inspired and what they may have done in their life and afterwards who runs This Magnificent world and we ourselves we just have to say there are other answers to this question who knows what's bad who knows what's good maybe there are gulim and maybe the person's come came back because they're a Gilgo maybe has a greater plan for the world in general that's the E answer there are many answers but the answer begins with Von the answer begins with a a level of humbleness so a Herold Kushner can jump up and say hey God how could you let bad things happen to a good good fellow like me but we with a humbleness we say you know what you love me more than I love me isn't that true you think you love yourself more than hem loves you Shem loves you much more than you love yourself and wants what's best for us in this world in the next World for our for our so I tell you that story actually we'll end we'll end with one last story just because we have to end on a little bit of a high I'm not sure if I told this story before but if I did it's still fun to hear there was um I I was in Atlanta and I was flying home and I I arrived to the airport early when you arrive early you know you try to take an earlier flight they used to not charge for that recently they charge like $50 to go on an earlier flight but they didn't didn't charge so I get to the airport and I'm 3 hours early so I go to the front desk and I say you know what can you get me on an earlier flight so the lady behind the front desk said well the only earlier flight is leaving in 15 minutes and you're never going to make it so I said to the lady let me try let me at least try ladies you're not going to make it and we can't issue a ticket it's going to mess up the system if you're not going to make it's invalid so I said to her one moment I didn't show you what I have yet and I had this beautiful box of kosher cookies I take it out and I handed there I said you see these these could all be yours for the price of a ticket change so she shows it to her friends and there was a consensus that they would make me a ticket so they made me a ticket they split up the cookies and I was Off to the Races little did I realize that here I am in the largest airport in the United States the Atlant airport it's humongous so okay here we go I got 15 minutes I'm running running running and as I run I run all the way till the X-ray machine of course the X-ray machine could take a long time especially after 911 time take off your belt take care off your shoes take off this take off that take off that take off that and you're taking everything off and oh you forgot this go back go in so by the time by the time it was all done it took a long time I looking at the time okay well I guess my plane is leaving right now but who knows let me try to make it anyways so at the time of liftoff I had just gotten through the X-ray machine and now it's time to go to the right terminal because I wasn't in the right terminal everything is connected VIA trains underground trains so I get on the escalator and it is one of the largest escalators that you ever see it's so large it has its own escalator music you know you're going down you're going down it takes three minutes huge now we're underneath the ground and I say okay great as soon as I get down there the train comes I said okay great at least I'm going to hopefully catch a train so I'm in terminal C and I have to get to F so I said okay great CDF I get on the train gets there just on time I go and I get on the train going the opposite direction oh no so close not even so now I have to go c b a uh baggage claim ground transportation terminal okay now wait till everyone's on by each one back bag terminal ground transation baggage claim a b c d f by the time I got the F you you know I missed it by like 25 minutes okay one second I got to go up the the escalator same escalator I'm taking my time you know it's taking forever ever everever I get to the top and then I begin to run because the gates 20 gates away and maybe I could still you know how we do things that make no sense like why are you running where are you running to your train your your plane's not leaving for another two hours no got to run who knows so I'm running running running I get to the correct gate and sure enough the door is still open the plane was delayed the door is still open so happy but the the plane was basically full and there were just a few people who were there waiting on standby except that since I had a ticket I go before them so a few people already gotten on on standby but I was able to be right away just to go on so there was this young fellow he's a you know 18-year-old fellow not Jewish and um he looks at me and uh and he's like you can see the sad eyes like one more guy on the plane means one less spot for him so I look at him and you have to remember we're in the South Atlanta is the South it's very religious so I look at him and I shake my finger and I say if the Lord wants you to get on you're GNA get on the Lord so he nods a religious religious fell the Lord okay whatever so I'm waiting there in the terminal I'm not the terminal in the in the this little tunnel and all of the sudden the guy in front of me says you know what I forgot my carryon in in uh in the terminal I got to go back out of the out of the tunnel so the lady the steward says you can't go back out we don't let he say I have to she says if you go back out I can't let you back in I got to go out so she says okay suit yourself he runs out she points to this guy he says you come on in yes so as he walks in I shake my hand I say the Lord wants you to get on you're going to get on so here's a few he's a few guys behind me meanwhile it's still not guaranteed that we're going to get on because what they do is they keep you in the tunnel and then as there's a seat of Hill okay now you can go there you can go there so a lady comes out into the tunnel and says listen we don't know if we're going to be able to get you all in but in case we do in case we do I just want you to know that there's no more room in the overhead compartment so give us your carryon we're going to gate check and we'll give it back to you so all these non-jews very daintily take out you know their headphones and that's all they need but you know I packed all yish and I got everything all piled up in one mess got that's filling and and and my Talis and my gar and this and that right like everything is in one big rly so I said okay I sit down on the floor I undo it I begin to try to take and find underneath what I'm looking for and a few people behind me were getting all antsy I say you know what go go ahead of me just go ahead of me so by the time I get what I need it the only people at the end of the line were me and this other guy so he looks at me he says why'd you let them go ahead you may not get on this plane I said you're forgetting if the Lord wants you to get on you're going to get on so he nods you know well one person after the next get on until all the only people left in the tunnel were me and him and then his threw comes out and she says you're the only two left I said yeah she said well we regret to tell you that there is no more room in coach so you'll have to go first class I look at the guy so we sat next to each other in first class in the lap of luxury the Lord wants you to get on you we you know we're we're not the chest Master here we don't know we don't know so when things happen whether the outcome is wrapped up in a beautiful bow or whether it's something that's a mystery within an enigma all we know is when a person says why do bad things happen to good people all he says Hashem runs this world and whatever happens with Von it's not that he resigned himself I don't know so I'd rather not know is the right answer because we say Hashem you love me more than I love myself and if Hashem wants something to happen it's going to happen and it's going to be for our good thank you very much