Men: This Is the Most Powerful Thing You Can Do for Your Relationship

I'm not telling men to breadcrumb. I'm not telling men figure out the bare minimum amount of attention you can get away with giving your wife, right? That's not what I'm saying, God forbid. What I'm saying to men is I'm encouraging men, and women, if you want to judge this, you can judge this, but you're not helping yourself by by by jumping down my throat and and telling me that I shouldn't give this advice to men when this actually improves marriages. That men often think it's it's too much of a tall order. I can't bring it. I don't have enough energy. I don't have They get intimidated before they even start. Men have to know it's actually not that much of a tall order. Just give her attention. Just ask her how her day was and actually listen. And care. And you don't even have to offer any answers or solutions to her problems. Just listen until she feels truly heard. And then you want to know something? That That investment that you made, and people got mad at me when I used this in another place. Oh, you're making it transactional. I'm not making it transactional. This is not a business. This is building a home together. Okay? An investment doesn't have to be transactional. You know, if if you plant the tree for future generations that you're never going to eat from, that's also an investment. You take the seed, you put it in the ground, and you wait for something much bigger to come back much later. It's also an investment. The word investment is not inherently a dirty word. And anyway, if men make that emotional investment a true one, not not manipulative, not as a strategy, but truly truly truly make that opening move. When you come through the door, focus on her, ask her how her day was, bring her a tea or a cold seltzer, whatever she enjoys, tell her to put her feet up, and just listen to her. That investment that you're making going to come back into your home in an upgraded fashion, which you as a man can never muster on your own. It's impossible, just like you as a man can't get pregnant and have the babies even if you want to. Okay? So, this is an emotional pregnancy. It's pregnancy with with with emotional energy. So, men, please understand your primary value and what makes you unique and what will always make you indispensable is your ability to initiate. Initiating means walk through the door and instead of trying to get from her, trying to get attention, trying to get validation, resist that desire and just give. And just give. Give and give and give. I promise you that what you will build together when you take initiative is far greater than what either of you could build on your own.