Why Do Others Have It Easier? | Letter #26

All right, good evening. Welcome to 30 letters in 30 days. This is letter number 26. 26. Shame Havaya. Um, we are really getting close to the I won't call it the end, but I'll call it the culmination. And uh I do hope to have news soon about whether there will be an event and what form that will take as far as the last class uh on Olive Nissen. Uh regarding the books, as I mentioned last night, the booklets are printed. They exist. They are actually physically printed. Um go to 30letters30days.com for more information. [clears throat] Get your book. Okay. Yes, I'm looking in the chat about the message about the previous letter. Yes, I saw your message about Teteres. Yes, that was a great message. Should uh someone's asking what was your favorite letter of the series? Mine was the last letter about growing a beard. Okay. Yeah. What was I'm say I'm reading what this the person's writing in the chat. What uh what was my favorite letter? So, uh, difficult to choose. Um, maybe I'll think about it and, uh, on the last night I'll share what my favorite letter was. Okay. We're going to jump in. Brooklyn shalom. The ninth day of year 5719 Brooklyn shalom which means the writing to a man greetings and blessings in answer to your letter from the third day of in which you write the general gist the main chapters may overall about what happened to you and how it all is worked out now. Uh basically you went through a bunch of stuff and now you're in a more I guess stable situation and then you conclude with a with a wonderment. you sort of uh are perplexed. mitzvah. Why is it that that when you want to ascend level after level in Torah study and mitzvah observance, you're suddenly beset with obstacles and difficulties and and and if that's not enough, you're doing the right thing and you're seeing uh problems, obstacles at the very same time, you young men meaning your peers who are uh not following the same path of Torah and mitzvah and they're living without these difficulties without toil without effort etc. This is a classic question of why do bad things happen to good people and there are many many egress that address this question. Why? Because many many people asked various uh iterations of this question. The Reb is obviously going to answer this person in a way that fits the way that they're asking and where they're coming from and what their situation has been and what it is. We know that. Um, in other words, what I'm saying is this. There's [clears throat] not like a a file where you pull out the formal answer to why the bad things happen to good people and when somebody asks a question in that category, you just sort of cut and paste that answer. That's not how it works. The deb is going to answer in a way that's individualized. Of course, right? Everything I'm saying here is uh is obvious at least to the pe the the people who have been studying the Debb's letters with me for a while now. You know that. Okay. So, how is the Debb going to answer this person? Let's see. Let's see. You understand the guy's problem? He's chosen to live a Torah observant life. Now, I don't know if he's coming from a secular background and he's newly observant or if he's coming from a religious community where his peers or many of his peers have left the fold. But either way, it could be it could be. I don't know. It could be either. But either way, his complaint is he's the good boy. He's keeping the rules and he's having more difficulties in life. It seems that he's talking about getting established and um sort of I mean it appears from from the letter I'll just without spoiling anything I think mostly he's talking about professionally getting established in a field and uh financially and he sees like he's doing the right thing and then he sees peers his peers who are not making those decisions and just doing whatever they want to do and they're living the good life and uh he sees them having very rapid success and becoming established in their fields and making money and it's like what's up with this? I mean this this isn't right. Why is this happening? So that's what is complaining. All right. So how's the deb going to respond to him in a way that is individualized just for him? Let's find out. Boom. The answer to this is in your letter. And I just want to repeat this and maybe you're tired of hearing this from me because I know I say this a lot, [snorts] but one of the things that I [clears throat] love about the Debb's letters and one of the things that changed my entire my entire experience of reality, the the the way that I view life was radically changed. When I understood the Reb's fundamental belief that problems are not merely solved by way of solutions, but the problems themselves contain the solutions. And therefore when somebody presents a difficulty you don't have to import an answer that addresses that difficulty. You have to look right at the difficulty. See it see it as it is. And within it you will see that the solution is already right there. And there's so many ways that this expresses itself. This idea expresses itself in the Reb's not just in egress where the rebba is corresponding with people but really everywhere the this is a fundamental concept and we're going to to see an illustration of that concept at work here in this letter. Your question young man of why do bad things happen to good people? Why do the wicked prosper? Why do the righteous suffer? Classic question. And I could give you a classic answer, but I'm not going to give you the answer. I'm going to give you your answer. And what do I mean by your answer? I mean your answer. You already gave me the answer. I'm going to say that again. I'm not just going to give you the answer, the correct answer, the official answer. I'm going to give you your answer. And by your answer, I don't just mean an answer which is tailor made for you. I mean the answer that was tailor made by you. You sent me your answer. You think you sent me a question. You sent me an answer. You know the famous story of Jonathan Saxs. He says, "The labba changed my whole life without saying or writing one word." I wrote to him, "Should I become the next chief rabbi of England?" So he said, "The Reba knew editing marks." Because he used to work for Kahos. That's when the Reba came to America. That's how Jonathan Sax explains it. He knew editing because he worked for Kahos for the Labavich publishing house. So Jonathan Sax says that Ebbett took the my my my letter that I wrote to him. should I become the next chief rabbi of England? And he made the transpose editing marks where you switch words and he just flipped it like the little symbol and now it said I should become the next chief rabb send it back to him. Boom. There you go. In other words, Jonathan Sax sends the a question. The deba takes Jonathan Sax's question, turns it into an answer or really reveals that it was an answer, sends it back to him. Okay, that's just the EBA's approach to everything. [gasps] There's real there's no real darkness. There's only light. [laughter] So if you think you're seeing darkness, look more closely. There's the light. All right. The answer to your question is in your letter. In your letter itself. Let's see. You describe how you your arrangement, your current situation is that you have to train, you have to learn sort of I think apprentice would maybe be the word we would use uh in your field for three or four years. maybe even called a paid internship. So there's a three or four year period where you are learning the trade. And now what you do is you get you you're considered like a regular um whatchamacallit uh what do you call it? You're working uh a laborer. A laborer. You're you're you're you're a laborer um in in fitting or in keeping with your current knowledge. Meaning you don't yet have the knowledge that you're going to have. You're learning in order to have that that knowledge, but you don't yet have it. So now you're just getting paid like any other laborer. Now you're going to become more than a laborer, but for now you're getting paid like a lab laborer. So mistaka lesh 110 liter. They used to have the liter system of currency in you just get 110 liter a month. [clears throat] In other words, it's not enough to do because you you're doing right now. you're a laborer and you're getting paid less than what you're going to be getting paid when you finish your your training [snorts] rather you need a period of preparation of study and then after you complete that then the work [clears throat] and the pay will become much more. Okay, so far don't be surprised that you don't understand how to put together this answer. The deb is just establishing very practically what is the situation. Now, of course, the deb is going to use this as a mush as an allegory for life, for life itself, which answers the most profound question of why do the wicked prosper and why do the right righteous suffer? But you understand right now just the situation that Deb is describing. He's saying the guy is in a situation where he has to do three or four years of study. It seemed to me that the study is connected to the work that he's doing now. It could actually it occurs to me it could be two se totally separate things like he's working his way through school and he's [snorts] he's a laborer while he's earning enough money to pay tuition while he's training in another field. But for some reason, I I think it's one field. That's that's how I took it because it sounded like it's one field. Uh at any rate, the point is he's in a phase right now, which he knows how long it takes. It's a three or four year training period where he gets paid a very low rate. He gets paid like a laborer. He gets paid like somebody who does not have any special skill or uh education. However, after the 3- four year period, then he will have he will be allowed to do a more uh specialized form of work fitting befitting his specialized training and and education [clears throat] and then uh commensurately he's going to get paid a lot more. He's not going to get paid like any other laborer. He's going to get get paid well. And that's why indeed why you know he's he's he's sticking through this 3 four year period. Okay. So that's that's the situation. [snorts] [sighs] [clears throat] The reason for this is simple. Like why should it be that you're not getting paid well for three or four years until you do get paid well? It's simple. It's obvious. The bigger the goal is, the preparation has to be bigger and wider. In other words, you want to go from a regular laborer job, which I mean it's like minimum wage we would call it in America, uh to something that pays really well. So obviously you don't just go straight into that. There's a process of paying your dues and in this case it takes three four years. And it makes sense because the bigger the jump that you want to make then the the bigger the preparation in order to make that jump. Conversely, anytime you have a very small uh aspiration or even no aspiration at all, meaning you're not really moving anywhere, you're not attaining anything new. Then then there's less preparation. Obviously, you don't have to prepare to do what you're already doing or you if you're going to do something that's a little bit more than what you're already doing. Okay. So, then you prepare a little bit and it doesn't take that long. Or sometimes you don't even need need any preparation at all. Fine. That's the guy's situation. That's what he wrote to the Reb. He wrote he explained to the Reb his situation right now. The Reb is going to take this guy's present situation and use it as a mushel, as a parable, an allegory to explain to him [laughter] the answer to his philosophical quandry of why his peers who are not to observant are succeeding in life already when he's not yet succeeding in life. You following? Now you probably even are starting to figure out where the deb is heading. Let's see. All right. So along the same lines now that is pivoting into the explanation. A life devoid of meaning. [gasps] [sighs] tragically somebody who's living a uh a shallow existence. You don't need any preparation for that. You want to just eat, drink, and be merry. You can just roll out of bed and do that. Doesn't take any special preparation to figure out how to do that. Anyone knows how to revert to their basic animal survival mode? It's pretty simple. [clears throat] Any pleasure that one does experience while living that way is fleeting. It's but momentary. So why should it be surprising that one needs no preparation in order to lead such a life? follow what the is saying? Your friends who unfortunately are leading lives that lack depth and meaning and they're already they've already quote unquote arrived. They're living the life that they want to live already. Yeah, of course they are. because it doesn't take a lot of preparation to be able to arrive at a goal that has very little meaning to it to begin with. So that's why they're already where they want to be cuz where they want to be unfortunately is is not something that's ultimately rewarding and that's why they can just start already now. This means to say anyone who will contemplate about his future even for a moment. You don't have to go sit and meditate for hours. Just think for a minute. He'll realize that it's worth it to work many years at the requisite preparation whatever it requires whatever is needed to prepare for his life because through this through this preparation even if it takes years He's going to exponentially improve his life over the coming decades. So you stop a second and you think, I'm going to put in a few extra years of work and I won't immediately be where I want to be. I'm going to be in an intermediate preparation phase, in a liinal phase. Oh, those liinal phases, they are tough. All the in between transitional phases are tough. The twilight zone literally, you know what they say in life, when one door closes, another door opens, but it's hell in the hallway. [laughter] [sighs] Transitional phases are rough. This is the idea of liinal space or liinal time, you know, like there there's a whole aesthetic called liinal art or images of uh places that are not destinations or starting points, you know, like a a truck stop along the interstate. Nobody starts there, nobody ends there. It's just a place people pass through. And it's tough being in those transitional phases. But here's the thing. Here's the thing. Of course, it's tough. But when you realize that there is a reason for going through these transitional phases, that they are not just um downtime. They are preparation. They are necessary preparation. It's not just, oh, please go sit in the waiting room until I call you. Right? That feels like a waste of time. But and I want to speak to everybody right now. If you're going through a transitional phase in life, you're waiting for something, whether it's a career or it's a shiddok or it's a it's an answer from Hashem, whatever it is, everything's an answer from Hashem. I want you to know, you're not sitting in a waiting room. You're not just [laughter] It's not that God is too busy and he can't deal with you yet. And when he has time, he's going to take care of you. God forbid [snorts] we go through liinal phases, but they're not just sitting there and waiting. They are preparation. You're on a highway. You're getting to your destination. And as the Rev is explaining, the greater the attainment that you're working for, [sighs and gasps] yes. Yes. Unfortunately, but this is the reality, the more prolonged the liinal phase is going to be. But if someone would think just for a moment that Ebba says about the exchange rate over here that spending a few years investing in your future, preparing for your future is going to pay off exponentially, meaning it's not a one:one ratio. It's it's it's an exponential uh increase. So then a person is going to easily accept upon himself those difficulties. All right, let's continue here. Uh I love that expression like the sharp short or short sharp maybe you'd even say the pathy statement of our sages. Agra according to the pain is the gain and I know in English they say no pain no gain um that lacks a certain dimension that the laavd that the kazal has uh it's good it's close it's close to the Jewish concept but no pain no gain is a categorical statement it's binary talking about no pain, no gain. But the mazal is a spectrum. It's a scale. Agra in accordance with the pain is the gain. So you know when you say no pain, no gain. Okay. So I don't then then I know I I can't get by with having no pain. So just give me some pain. Just give me a little. Does it have to be a lot? Just give me a You're not allowed to get around having the pain. So, okay. So, give me a little just just Yeah, I'm good. Yeah, I'll have a taste. Yeah, just a little. But when you understand it's according to the pain is the gain. Okay. All right. Hold on. Let me psych myself up for this. All right. Give me as much pain as not not any extra pain. I'm not looking for any superfluous pain, but however much is necessary in order to attain what I can attain. Okay, fine. I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll do it. So, that's what the Reb is saying here. the and and not only is it proportionate, it's actually disproportionate that the gain is disproportionately greater than the pain. It's not just uh the more pain the more gain but it's the more pain and then exponentially the more gain. It's it's a it's a disproportionate uh reward. That means to say that if you double the toil and the effort, you don't just double the reward [clears throat] and the results, but you exponentially multiply it many many times over. And when you think like that, then yeah, it becomes a no-brainer to sign up for the more difficult track. So here here's the answer. You're saying, I signed up for a life of Torah mitzvah. I signed up for a good life. My friends signed up for a meaningless life. and they're already enjoying their their their lives. They're already reaching their goals and I'm on this slow track to get to where I want to go. And the Neba says, "Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Because what you are headed for is so much greater than what you're able to have right now. There's a process you have to go through. But here's the deal. Go through it and the reward will be exponential to the amount of effort that you invest at this time. I hope that these few lines will be sufficient for you to meditate upon. In other words, I hope that I've given you sufficient food for thought. You can take this letter and you can read it and reread it. And I hope this is going to help you to get into the mind space that you need to get into in order to embrace the period of life that you're in right now. And then after you do the proper meditation, you'll be able to come to the proper conclusion, the true conclusion that you will use out. you will make use of these years of youthful energy uh as as a time of necessary preparation for your future. Don't waste your youth living it up, enjoying it now. Use your youthful energy in a way where you're investing and then you're going to see a return on that investment in a way that is exponentially greater than what you put in. So that you will ultimately be happy physically as well as spiritually. The never wants us to have both. Mez and uh there's only one way there's only one path that will bring you to true happiness both materially and spiritually. What's the one path? It is the spiritual preparation of learning tra which is called a Torah of life of and to keep the mitzvah of which it says you understand here very important mitzvah is not just mitzvah is and the mitzvah are [sighs and gasps] I've said this before I'll say it again in the in in the Reb's worldview there's no such thing as a trade-off between spirituality and material bounty can't happen in God's world that you would have to sacrifice success in the conventional uh definition of the term in this physical world in order to have integrity and and and live a life of principle. It's not possible. Why would that happen? The same God who made the world is the God who gave us the Torah. So the Tory is a Tory. It's a Tory of life meaning everyday life. It is how to be successful in life. Not just up in heaven but down here. And the mitzvah about the mitzvah. The Tyra says and live with them. Not lose your life because of them or give up your life because of them. But this is the way to have your best life is through them. Let's listen to this poetry. The Reb says that this is the fulfillment meaning living a good life spiritually and materially is the fulfillment of the the and the bos means a request. Id means encouragement means a commandment. [laughter] The Reb uses each of those terms to describe the the the the phrase and you should choose life. Hashem says to us as a request, as encouragement, and as a commandment, you know, sometimes the request is enough. Oh, hashem requested. No problem. Sometimes we need encouragement. It's like, ah, I want to do this, but I don't know if I can. [laughter] And sometimes the tivway is necessary. Like, no, no one's asking. No one's encouraging. Do it. Do it now. to live your best life now. But at any rate, what is it that Hashem is requesting and encouraging and ordering us to do is to live our best lives. Choose life. A true and happy life in this world. also in this world in the most practical sense. It's all going to come together beautifully for you young man. You're going to have success not just in your field that you're training for, but you're going to have a good life. And the fact that you're investing a few years in that right now, [sighs] don't be frustrated. You're not missing out on anything. You're making a wise choice which is going to come back and pay you exponentially for for the work that you're putting in now. You're gonna have a great life. God willing, he'll report good news and all of the above signed by the secretariat. Amazing letter. All these letters are amazing. Maybe this is my favorite letter. I don't know. Right now, it's my favorite letter. [sighs and gasps] Okay, we'll see you tomorrow night for a double dose, a Thursday night double dose. And I'm going to have a surprise for you. Um, I'm shooting [clears throat] on location from a very exotic local. You'll find out when you tune in tomorrow night at 1000 p.m. Eastern.