Thought for the Week Parshas Vayeira Moral Compassion, Rabbi Yaakov Winner 5784

how are you I hope everyone is I hope everyone is healthy strong and happy physically and spiritually today is and tomorrow is the fth who founded the network today is the yite of one of my most important mentors and that is who was a famous Mas spiritual guidance counselor in the mor so today I want to dedicate today's she and his honor so So today we're going to speak about the connection between all these things and my dear but first as usual we'll start with a prayer right now our brothers our sons our daughters our children our family is in Gaza and we're fighting a war so we have to add so until the war is over we're going to add s to our regular routine Shear on Friday thought for the week first we'll start with so I had in mind that we should win the war swiftly and we should be successful in rescuing all the hostages and there shouldn't be even one casualty now going to give in honor of the situation so that it all be work good now let's talk some words of t as we spoken many times it's amazing amazing how when you look into T you see the messages you see guidance for what the situation is that we're going through right now and we spoke about the last couple of weeks in this week's Pasha there's something so amazing the very very core of the issue right now in the war is the subject we're going to talk about today and that is which says Whoever has Mercy on cruel ones in the end he becomes cruel over merciful ones and that's the issue right now with the world opinion talking about cease fire and that we should have mercy on the civilians of Gaza guess what the Torah teaches us this week the very stark contrast between different types of kindness and what is the Jewish perspective concerning kindness and this is the very story in this week's para which touches upon it but first we'll say that it seems to me that the central theme of this week's Pas is self- sacrifice which means selflessness in the beginning of the par we see that God appeared to appears to everyone knows the famous story which is repeated many times in the talks of the rebi that the re rashab was 5 years old and he asked how come hasem never appeared to me anded his grandfather answered when a Jew is 99 years old decides to circumcise himself so then he's worthy of God's revelation that he should appear to him so again that a 99 year old should circumcise himself is selflessness then comes the idea of kindness and this is the epitome the idea of kindness that this week's par even though last week we spoke about the kindness involved in the war but traditionally and in the M the focus is on this week's story about how hasem is convers with and notices the guests who comes first the guests or Hashem the guests why because that's what Hashem wants but what's the point when it comes to your being intimate and one with hem in the revealed way so you're reaching levels of spiritual Heights is selfish it's your spiritual Heights it's making your you feel good your best in the glory of the Lord but running and and and um bothering yourself to deal with guests sometimes you're not in the mood sometimes it's hard and especially in this case where abam was in the height of pain because of the circumcision and this is the whole wonder of the story Hashem made it very hot that the sun should come out so that shouldn't have to bother with guests little it it turned out to be that a was more bothered by the fact that he couldn't exercise his kindness trait his kindness muscle and that was more pain for him than the fact that he was suffering from the circumcision so again the point is abam represents the the the ultimate picture of kindness as it's spoken about inim and we've spoken about this many times of was the epitome in brief no meant that he bothered himself physically sometimes you have a rich person and he has Butlers he has Maids they cut up the meat they carry the plate they clean up afterwards no by says he came to the door he was the porter he took his suitcases he ran up the stairs he sweat physically to exercise his kindness that means he was he was generous with his body sometimes a person who's a very great intellectual likes to be to himself doesn't spend time with the lower class people and they're they're not his level it's very difficult it's one thing to give a person a plate of scrambled eggs and do kindness but then to actually engage in conversation and have patience and tolerance call whatever you want and to actually love the lower class so to speak and over here the ver is that he sat down he talked philosophy he talked spirituality he spoke mysticism monotheism to construction workers and as explained it meant to people that were inferior so to speak they bowed down to the dust on their feet there's a level of feet there's a level of dust on the feet and there's people that bow down to the dust on the feet and mean to say the concept the metaphor is these people were connected to the lowest of the low like in physicality mentality and sitting over there with them he's giving up with his time to spend time and to talk philosophy godliness spirituality with these people so some people they're not break they don't have broad mindness they give a small check but there's others that think big they give a big big check they just give and give you see by the re by dollars by the way the re is always it's amazing to watch videos someone says can I have when the re gives dollars so grandmother says can I have dollars for my grandchildren says how many she says 20 gives 20 what guy comes this going I have dollars for the whole my whole floor in the hospital medical staff or the whole Hospital how many 100 the Reb starts giving the Reb is a giver anyways so again what's kindness true kindness and this is the point true kindness and this is what we're speaking about by has to come from humility and it's all about the other okay so now we have in the first words of the para selflessness because he circumcised himself then we have the story of his kindness which means it's about the other not only sympathy but empathy a lot of these concept we spoke about before so we're not going to go into it at length then later in the Pasha comes the ultimate of self-sacrifice which is the story of thata which we spoke already about once before but today I want to talk about the Crux of the issue the story this week's para of the ninth test and what's the ninth test the ninth test is that AB had a son called ismo and S told Abraham that he has to expel banish is from their home now there's not a talk about parenting this is a talk about ISO and this is a talk about what the lessons that we're supposed to take about it and how it is relevant to the current situation as we speak so what's the story it's called the ninth test the 10th test which is thata is a greater test obviously but first let's talk about why this test is the ninth test that means a level of degree of hardship of challenge only that kada which really truthfully is incomparable unparalleled but still this test the ninth T was greater than all the previous eight and the answer is cuz this was home we say sometimes that person has challenges this test was a test nothing hit home nothing was as painful nothing was as disturbing as this story that happened until the AR but until the story of the ninth test nothing really was such a challenge to like this test and over here not like the other tests over here the P explicitly said that had a problem with it as we'll soon see so s gives birth to S sees that is a problem and we'll soon see how the problem is what the problem is but when s tells a that he has to expel ISO just to want to bring out the point it says the matter greatly distressed it doesn't say which would be interesting enough would show how challenging it was for but it says means exceedingly so we see that this was a very very hard test s told you have to banish okay what's the reason because before that the PK says and that was the little translation ising says so Rashi brings down that this word could be interpreted as the three cardinal sins of idolatry immorality in relations and murder and actually as Rashi brings down she saw how sorry how is had arrows ped pointed so this is the point first let's talk about what it says simple and then we'll go to what says so the simple story over here is abam has a child from Huger brought up in his home and he gives him a certain a certain education and this child is rejecting he represents everything which is the polar opposite not selflessness but selfish Gil means no morality when it comes to relations no loyalty just he you do what you want and the same thing is idolatry you're not sticking to one God and then murder you murder cuz you're more important than the other person and like Rashi also brings down he didn't want that should get the inheritance so there's one point over here that it was a matter of s knew that was the one who was going to be yish and as the says right over here when was distressed and disturbed by this hasem tells him that is the one y was the one who's going to carry on the values the virtues the principles and everything you stand for the Jewish Nation so number one it was a question of security and defense s is had the arrow pointed to number one number two it's about the Reit brings out other places that was threatened by is a couldn't have is in the house who was crushing and destroying and decimating the entire culture of the whole and therefore was a it was a threat to as we said before but it was also a threat and the message is don't the you have to go with the 100% And if you feel there's a threat to it then you have to get rid of that threat okay now according to and this is connecting now with how we started the year about having kindness what's the right kindness so therefore let's go back to this case so it was the ninth test yes and why was it the ninth test because it was close to home and what did you e have to exercise similar similar but in a much smaller form in a much less degree like we explained concerning the AA that what makes the AA the greatest test According to some commentators because to exercise gur the most kindest person in the world was asked to slaughter his son and to slit his son throat so therefore explains that this test wasn't in the mode of his regular disposition and and temperament and characteristic which was kindness a represented the epitome of kindness he was the personification of kindness and here hasem asked him to do something which is seemingly the most cruel thing to do it'll be difficult for a regular person to kill his own child all the more so okay that's that but now in a miniature form was a similar thing is Son and the abish is telling him and that's why he had difficulties doing it it's his own flesh and blood s is talking out the mother it's Huger but it's still his own son and it's in his home and it's in his Dal it's not close to home it his home and what does he have to do now he has to exercise gur a sense of banishment a sense of of expulsion a sense of expelling the opposite of kindness so therefore this was the ninth test because it was so difficult for him and here we come back to this expression of if in this case he wouldn't have exercised this he would have said I have to be merciful then only negative would came out of it sor was the one who was cuz who knows what could have happened to it would have ended up being a situation who was thead who represent what was right what was just would have been hurt and who knows how much so okay now let's go to how sidus explains it and we'll take this concept of correct kindness correct benevolence proper generosity or Twisted generosity perverted generosity warped kindness and this is really very much connected to the uh Progressive woke Etc I don't want to get into examples right now I'm a teacher of but so we'll start and I think I want study this in withes Sim B one of the most famous it's called this was a letter that Al wrote after the story of where he asked not to gloat at the ones who were their opposition before but to take the kindness that hasem bestowed upon them that the AL was released from prison in a humble Manner and in thises he brings the contrast between of is and of first I want to say that the some Genesis what I'm speaking today is found in over there the re gets into this concept of two times of kindness see there but I'm going to read you from T so the AL says like this he speaks about that he's so humbled that he was released from prison and he said that this is this is the kindness to and he said I am but dust and Ashes which reflects ab's humility and then he goes on to say this is jakob's trait and then he brings out we talk about the other side this is the of so even though in this story itself that we just discussed that banishes but really in essence what is going on over here this is the story of is of Kusa kindness of Holiness which means it comes out of humility which means it's not about you which means there's a higher authority and therefore it means that you're not b by it according to your nature that you're kind but it's connected to a higher authority which is really aity because it's not about you and therefore if you know that the the real purpose right now is to exercise a bit of gur banishing the sun then you'll be able to do it because it wasn't about you in the first place you do have a kind nature and that's beautiful but you're not limited by a kind nature you have true kindness which has to include sometimes an element of discipline as we'll soon see and that's the contrast between of and of is yes is is's Son and therefore there's the but because BYO it's connected to his nature and his ego therefore in the end it's going to be twisted therefore they can never transcend themselves and therefore if it's a question of because might inherit so therefore I have to kill because it was never really about something greater than you you're still stuck on yourself so you'll have generosity when you decide to be generous or you can end up doing something the most warped and twisted and still think is generous but you're the one who the arbitrator you decide not some greater higher authority so really it doesn't come from humility let's look inside the greater kindness that's bestowed upon him the more kindness is bestow to him the greater success he has he becomes bigger by himself his ego becomes enlarged and that's the opposite by a Jew the more kindness is best him more success he has in life the more humbl he has like he brings before the ver we've spoken about this subject many times I don't want to elaborate this is really the rashi rashi says later on and rash says the we are the The Humble ones not we are minority that's why God chose us we're the most humble ones that's whyem chose us and then he brings by by by by by some of the Gentiles the greater success the more the ego become enlarged in direct measure of the success hey I'm the best and the more measure of the success the greater becomes the ego and by the Jewish people it's the opposite way around the more success the more humility but that's about kindness that's SP out upon you you're the recipient but now we're talking also about being The Giver same idea in Judaism we say when you have kindness it's cuz you look at yourself and the re speaks about the over there you look at yourself as you're undeserving and in general I'm just a trustee I'm giving the from what's his in the first place and I think to myself why did they make me a multi-millionaire because he trusts me to dispense of it properly and I only should take what I need and the rest I should give away that's one attitude that's that's when when you're humbled but then you have another attitude you know why I'm successful cuz I'm a smart cookie cuz I'm a businessman I'm a man and the more money I have my eego gets bigger I'm a big man yes you're generous but when you're generous it comes out of the sense that you're greater you're bigger you're more important and therefore you give to ones that are lower than you I was once talking to somebody I was pretty shocked because he was talking about an institution uh Mo and and how he is going to help and he says there's no one else who could do it there's no one else who's who's on the horizon that's that's rich that's you know like he was thinking to himself that it's him and then he lost his money they should up every single should have cult you have to be very very careful not to let it go to your head that's not the Jewish way the Jewish way is that the more money you have the more humbled you are it should even pain you that you're the one that has to be the giver and he has to be the recipient you should D into the as you have your millions and millions that you should make it that the other person should also have millions and the same thing is true in someone who's rich in knowledge sometimes a person's rich in knowledge When anybody ask them a question they make the other person feel bad they ask him a question and they go that I have to spend time talking to the person to share with the knowledge instead of ding to hasm there should come a day where everyone will know you everyone will be a everyone will have the knowledge so in the Jewish view the Jewish perspective the more you have the more you have to give and the more that was given to you the more humbled you are and you're humbled in how you give it's beautiful beautiful beautiful when you hear stories of people that are B right now in Israel and the whole Jewish World we see these stories of and I'm always so touched when you see how we're ready to give our ourselves selflessness and care for the other and go to the length that were unimaginable just to help another person so now let's connect it first to selflessness said that the whole point of the was he says to make a time I can't elaborate now because the video is already late but he said that he wants that the T should be like soldiers and he says which means we all have to be soldiers right now my friends there are soldiers that are going to Gaza and they we should protect them every single one of them right now and we should be able to get out of there and should be mission accomplished but right now they're there and right now every single one of us has to be soldiers and what does it mean to be soldiers selflessness they're being soldiers and they selfless with the physical body we have to be [Music] selfless as we see by and what does it mean drop everything thing this thing when the war broke out over 300,000 reservists came from all corners of to join up wow look at that at the snap of a finger of a moment's noticed they dropped everything and they were in Warrior mode ready to give up their life that's selflessness and that's the whole training of you're graduate of you're a graduate of Special Forces Navy Seals Commandos Marines and what does that mean every single person the training is to be communal conscience there's a higher authority there's a greater being give yourself up to it and the same thing concerning me I want to say one thing I've spoken to I've spoken about it many many times his nature was more being to himself I know maybe some other people talk of him when he was older and it's a different experience but from my experience and my friend's experience he had the nature of an intellectual and the more intellectual usually a person is the more he's to himself a bit aloof and a bit cold not as just the nature but when he would say and for bring with the B I cannot tell you how his true be Beauty and love came out and maybe it had to do with his with his personality psychologically speaking that he was a very private person a very private person is uncomfortable shedding their initions letting it all out doesn't come natural and especially he was just so AAL he was a very refined unassuming person I don't have words to tell you he was an elevated Jew he was so special I consider him one of the greatest of the last 50 years and there's so much to talk about him in any case when he said with the he went out of himself more than any other with a beauty a holy Vite he got up on the tables he hugged he made F he sang s songs unbelievable he sang songs he went into a circle he made soms it was an unbridled love which was projected and radiated from him I I don't know of any other Masia who his for was in that style he ended off the fors in such a way that that there was a climax of Joy most of the M when they fored they go to a certain point and the car runs out of gas it stops it could go a whole night but that's what happens usually at the end he was the only one I can't think of any other Mas when he F brained it ended off on this spiritual high in the heights of joy and happiness and you think such a personality if you saw him on a regular Tuesday afternoon it'll be the opposite but this is called M this is the beauty of yish kite this is the beauty of how person can go out of his nature he says but the true beauty comes out his the purity of his soul of his that he transcends his nature like transcends his nature the that if you have to exercise to banish you have to do that if for it meant to reach out and embrace and hug and just shine with love to everyone in his R in his dalus he would do that and the lesson in general today is very much so I don't want to elaborate it's about these social justice Warriors who sometimes can care more for trees and frogs and whales and chickens and they don't know what it means to really be attentive for five minutes to the person the human being that's standing in front of you and so on and so forth right now talking about what's going on with Israel those people that are talking about Seas fire and those people that are talking about having Mercy those people are actually exactly the point where is ready to kill and we say but he's only a lad but we have to realize exactly said before that means it's coming from your nature which means it's not really true goodness it's not really true kindness and the end therefore therefore the best way forward always in life is to remember the speak to look into then you come to [Music] the and the which is which is the came down it tells us that even in such a situation that sometimes an has to banish and this was the ninth test that we should be strong with our and the should make it to be like it says in [Music] the any Jew that has to be helped in whatever area of his life that he has helped she'll be helped right now in the Merit of posting from my home your man in Melbourne