Between Hashem & Me | Rabbi Fischel Schachter

So I'm at a Kiruv Shabbos. It's a gorgeous Shabbos. It's right after Pesach and it's Sefiras HaOmer time. Friday night, they were davening very early and they were counting Omer very early. Now, in Shulchan Aruch it says what to do. You should count along without a Bracha and make a condition that if you remember later... but I said, Eh, I'll remember later. Beautiful Friday night meal. Met so many amazing people that you can't possibly imagine. Came Friday night, I get to bed, and you know how it is when you fall asleep and you're thinking to yourself, I missed something. What is it? And it was almost morning, and I woke up and I said, I didn't count Omer! It never happened since my Bar Mitzvah that I missed day. Wait a second. You only have until עמוד השחר. That's like a little bit pre-dawn. I grab this little blue calendar that I have, and it says over here when the עמוד השחר is and the only light is a little light coming from the alarm clock. Can I still make it or not? And I have to find my... When you get my age, the only way to see the small letters is you have to put on your glasses, then lift them and close one eye. That's how it works. You're not wearing your glasses, it doesn't work. I have till 5:43 and right now it is 5:42. I have one minute! And I throw on my robe and I wash my hands. And wow! There's nothing a Jew likes more than make something at the last second. It was beautiful. Anyway, comes Motzei Shabbos and they're davening Ma'ariv and the person says: Today is 12 days in the Omer. And I correct him: 11. And they all turn to me and say: No, today’s 12. I said: It can't be, if last night was 10. They said: Last night was not 10. And I realized I checked to see when the morning is, but I didn't check to see which day it is. I counted the wrong day, 24 hours passed, I can’t make a Bracha. Okay, fast forward. I'm telling a story to kids by Shaleshudes. There’s a big Rebbe that's over here. And Motzei Shabbos I have Yohrzeit and I had asked that I can come up and daven Ma’ariv for the Amud. They said: Yes, you can. There’s a big Rebbe there and there's people standing on the bleachers and I'm davening Ma’ariv and in the middle of Shmoneh Esrei... Boing! I can't count Omer with a Bracha. What am I going to do? All these people are here. I'm panicking and I'm saying: Well, maybe I can. I mean, there are opinions, I think, that you could. I mean, maybe... Maybe I'm not sure I counted for sure the wrong day. And I'm, like, I'm beginning to think... Come on, I... God doesn't want me to be embarrassed in front of all these people. Then I said: If I make this Bracha now, it's not like all the people from the Parenches are going to say, No, no, you can't! No one knows. It's between me and you, Hashem. I said: I can't do it. I just told the person next to me: I can’t make the Bracha. I missed a day. I was sure the guy was going to say: How could you miss a day? No, he didn’t. He just jumped in and took over for me and it was really great. And I felt I... It was one of the greatest Nisyonos in my life, because it was between me and Hashem. And someone told me later that the Divrei Yoel, it once happened to him, once he had a medical emergency and he skipped the night and they came running over to him and saying, There are so many people on the Parenches. We have a way of doing it. There is a solution. You can ask someone, who could make a Bracha, not to make the Bracha and you're making the Bracha to be מוציא him. And the Rebbe said: I'm not looking for היתרים. No, I can't make the Bracha. I skipped a night. Yeah, but all these thousands of people on the Parenches, they have to learn from the Rebbe what it means to make a Bracha. They have to learn from the Rebbe what it means to say: If I can't, I can't. A Vayimaen moment is between you and God. Be careful with those moments because they're very special. It changes your life. Trust me.