Holy Pride | Rabbi Zev Smith

I once told a Bochur, You know what you need? A little bit of Gaiva. And he was shocked. Gaiva? I said: The Chazon Ish expressed a similar sentiment. Let me explain what he meant. You know, I merited to know R’ Moshe Feinstein. I watched him often. His diligence, his righteousness, his total command of the entire Torah was breathtaking. And I could say if I would live a hundred years, I wouldn’t reach his levels at all. But you know what else I think? What R’ Moshe’s eyes merited to see, and what my eyes have to see. R’ Moshe lived in a world that his heart beat only to the rhythm of ‘Praiseworthy are those who toil in Torah’. A world of holiness, of Torah. And we live in a world where we have to ask a Halachic question, Is it permitted to go into the street during the summer? And I think, Gaiva? For what? But then, all the more so. The Arizal told his disciple, R’ Chaim Vital, you have a holy Neshama, maybe greater than those that preceded you. And R’ Chaim Vital says: What? Greater than those that preceded me? He goes: Yes. Because greatness is not measured by actions, it’s by where the actions take place. And we live in a world of so much impurity, and you still do the Mitzvos with such devotion, you have a holy Neshama. The Arizal said this a few hundred years ago. What would he say in 5787? What would he say about our Mitzvos, our performances in 5787? And I told him: You’re not expected to be R’ Moshe Feinstein. You’re expected to be the best you could be in the world we live in. And everything counts so much more, because there’s so much darkness out there. You know, we talk about Shir Hashirim in awe. Our sages tell us, All songs are holy, the Song of Songs is Holy of Holies. What makes Shir Hashirim in a class for itself? So look in Rashi in the beginning of Shir Hashirim. Because Shir Hashirim was going on exile and widowhood, our being in exile as widows. You think about it, a widow is often associated with someone that’s forsaken, left alone, hopeless and helpless. Exile, widow, is the greatness of the Holy of Holies. Because in normal times, we could achieve holiness, but in times of exile, we could be the Holy of Holies that outshines even the previous generation, like the Arizal told his disciple. The Steipler writes in a letter, When a person in our times overcomes a challenge of a desire, it’s a light of holiness that lights up the world from that greatness. R’ Shlomo Lorincz was once faced with a difficult situation. After the founding of the State, it was arguably the first provocative act that the government wanted to take and build a mixed swimming pool in Yerushalayim. And he asked the Brisker Rav if there should be a protest. And the Brisker Rav was not certain. He said: Let’s leave it. A few days later, R’ Shlomo Lorincz met one of those that were pushing this new initiative and he decided to talk to him in a nice way, to maybe change his mind. But as soon as that person saw R’ Shlomo, he says, Who are you? What are you? Who do you think you are? Who do you think you are anyhow? I’m not worried about you. We’re going to do what we have to do. And he went back to the Brisker Rav. The Brisker Rav heard what he said, he goes, Now we have to make a protest. What did the Brisker Rav see? What changed? I’ll tell you. Because the greatest threat to a person’s success, the greatest danger to success is when we forget ‘who are you’ and ‘what are you’. And the Rav felt that if we are not certain what we are, what we stand for, what we could be, we lose our identity, we lose our Gaiva D’kedushah, we don’t stand a chance. And that’s what we have to hear over and over again. Who are you and what are you? Not the forbidden arrogance, but the holy pride of holiness, that in this world that I’m living in, I could achieve what no one did till now. Let’s remember and never forget, who you are and what you are.