Who I Truly Am | Rabbi Motti Neuburger

Often, when we try to gather Chizuk in terms of עניינים of being מתגבר on our Yetzer, we find it difficult to connect to individuals that are described in the Gemara, whether it be the Amora’im or even Yosef HaTzaddik. But there are people that were מתגבר in much recent times, people that had their own Vayimaens throughout the Doros. We all know R’ Shimshon Pincus and the great heights that he reached. We're talking about an American-born boy in the 1950s. He was a person who Shmiras HaEinayim was something very, very central in his life. From a young age, he was very, very Makpid on Shmiras HaEinayim. One time, someone asked him why he's so careful always to take a cab rather than a bus. He says: How much money do people spend on glasses, to have perfect vision? Why wouldn't I spend a few Shkalim in order to spiritually save my eyes? But when someone once asked Rav Pincus how it is that he mustered the strength, where does he gain that Chizuk from? And Rav Pincus said that it wasn't always so easy. And when he felt himself being נתרשל in his Avodas Hashem, when he felt himself being challenged, he would often climb to a very high building in Me’a She’arim, a building where he would be able to overlook the מקום המקדש, and looking at the מקום המקדש, he would scream to the Ribono shel Olam, those words of Dovid HaMelech. And he said: Sometimes I would scream those words more than a hundred times to the Ribono shel Olam, reminding myself of who I am, where I come from, who I truly am, what my essence is. And the truth is, that's what Yosef HaTzaddik did, as well. When Yosef HaTzaddik was challenged, his moment of Vayimaen was him not allowing himself to fall into ייאוש, into despair, but rather, Yosef HaTzaddik says: My forefathers, that were Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov, my forefather Yitzchak was asked to be an עולה על גבי המזבח, and I'm going to fall prey to the Yetzer Hara? Yosef HaTzaddik taught us, We don't look at how distant perhaps we have fallen, how far we have fallen, but rather we look at who we truly are. That's what elevates a person, that's what allows a person to reach their heights. The great Mashgiach, R’ Yeruchom, would tell his Talmidim, What leads to every חטא is A person doesn't realize his יקרות, his value. He doesn't realize who he is, ולא יבין, then, as the pasuk continues, he’s נמשל לבהמה. The essence to a person's growth, the true trigger to make sure that that propels us to the highest heights is a person has to realize his יקרות, how valuable he is, that deep down at his essence, it's a לב טהור ברא לי אלוקים.