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Why you need to walk away #narcissism #advice

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SoulWords—Rabbi Shais Taub avatar
SoulWords—Rabbi Shais Taub

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How does somebody become a narcissist? The classic question. And the psychologists all have different theories, and just for your information, I'm not a psychologist, and so I don't have the answer for you. And you'll go Google it, and you'll look around, and you'll find out that there is no consensus anyways. But here's what I think is much more important to ask. Not how did a narcissist become a narcissist? Because you know who never asks that question? The narcissist. >> [laughter] >> The only one who sits up at night and asks, "What is the villain origin story of my narcissist?" is the person who is being abused, who is being destroyed by a narcissist. So, here's what I want to tell you. If you feel right now that it's bringing you comfort to try to understand how this person became the way they are, go for it. But what I want to do is give you permission to just not worry about that. Why should you have more self-awareness on their behalf than they have about themselves? They're not asking how they became that way, so why are you?